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 Posted: Thu May 26, 2016 2:08 pm
Now, I do love my disability. but it limits my friend making skills. sad
Well, I can't really mingle. because I can't drive, make money or be safe.
I'm lonely a lot. I have more spare time then is healthy. and forced to be a hermit, really.
Makes me very sad. and I don't even do much inside my apartment. I'm bored constantly. NOT. FUN.
Don't get internet unless you pay for it. and I'm not a reader. There are tv shows I like, but....tv is just meh nowdays. help me. i get on the net on my phone, and that's all fine and dandy, but very small and typing is time consuming. Rather annoying.
The apartment building is for the disabled and elderly. It's great safety-wise, but I don't really wanna make friends with anyone. The elders are really kind, and I absolutely wouldn't mind hanging out with them, but...making friends is one thing I never learned.
The disabled there are rather low-functioning. This one blind guy keeps asking me back to his room for drinking. I smell weed in my hallway sometimes.
I'm pretty positive I'll be single forever because imagine how much care I need. That would really drain a person I think. Very sad.
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Posted: Thu May 26, 2016 8:27 pm
That's not necessarily true. The situation is, your person out there will need the kind of care you can provide and vice versa. That is how love works for folks that have a little extra baggage (I know this from experience!) there's gonna be people that can carry your suitcase full, and you can carry theirs.
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Posted: Thu May 26, 2016 9:45 pm
Well it may not be the same, but I know there are a lot of people here on Gaia who would be more than happy to be your friend.
What kind of TV shows are your favorite? Do you have any hobbies? Small conversations like these can get you started and before you know it, you'll find something in common that you can enjoy discussing!
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Posted: Thu May 26, 2016 9:47 pm
[.Volatile.] That's not necessarily true. The situation is, your person out there will need the kind of care you can provide and vice versa. That is how love works for folks that have a little extra baggage (I know this from experience!) there's gonna be people that can carry your suitcase full, and you can carry theirs. Firstly, I need to meet people. My safety skills are at the level of a 4 year old. I get lured by free candy. This is why my mother is my legal guardian. I've been raped three times. You think I would learn. I really have no idea why I do that. Safety is not within my power. Don't be sorry. This is one of my limits and there's nothing anyone can do about it except watch out at all times. And no ones gonna want that. They have their own things to do. Even if I do win over a person, they're not gonna have time. Secondly, I don't drive. I like to go out. Third, I'm a feminist and can't hold a job. Emotionally and mentally it's not possible. I have no money. I can't spend. What guy is gonna see that as ok? I don't like staying in. You need a car and money to go places. I need those provided for me. There's more, but who's gonna be ok with all of that? I wouldn't.
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Posted: Thu May 26, 2016 10:16 pm
Forelourne Well it may not be the same, but I know there are a lot of people here on Gaia who would be more than happy to be your friend.
What kind of TV shows are your favorite? Do you have any hobbies? Small conversations like these can get you started and before you know it, you'll find something in common that you can enjoy discussing!
im trying to keep up with Skin Wars. I missed the last one but I'm hoping for a rerun. I can't have Netflix because of a complicated web of reasons that I can't even find a way to reason out. I like Big Bang Theory, Young and Hungry, Girl Meets World, Younger...but can't find out how to keep up with new episodes. I love things that make me laugh. I'm a Criminal Minds freak. Loooove it. Not for the crimes. I love the characters and how they interact. I want to be Penelope Garcia. Those are the kind of friendships I want. I want to interact with people that way. Oh don't get me wrong. Internet buddies are all great. But I need to mingle and really be with people. Hobbies, sadly, no. Write, read, draw. I write a good bit actually. I have two diaries, a blog and a book of lists. I'm not comfortable if I don't have a spare notebook. Reading isn't my thing. My reading comprehension is where my brain damage really shows up. Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter fan though. Don't worry. Also Little Women. Draw? I make attempts but coloring is my creative outlet. I am a movie watcher for sure. But my body really doesn't like sitting for hours. My back is starting to really scream at me and I don't know what for. I rarely make origami. By rare, I mean once a year. I like to use my hands. I loooove to type. Building Legos is fabulous. But once you finish the thing, it's super hard to tear apart. It stays that way. Yes, great. But you can't take it apart without frustration, anger and injury. Perler beads are amazing. I have sooo so many pins on my boards of doing stuff. But they all require supplies that I don't have. Time,yes. Money and car to get them, no.
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Posted: Thu May 26, 2016 10:34 pm
Green_crayon42 im trying to keep up with Skin Wars. I missed the last one but I'm hoping for a rerun. I can't have Netflix because of a complicated web of reasons that I can't even find a way to reason out. I like Big Bang Theory, Young and Hungry, Girl Meets World, Younger...but can't find out how to keep up with new episodes. I love things that make me laugh. I'm a Criminal Minds freak. Loooove it. Not for the crimes. I love the characters and how they interact. I want to be Penelope Garcia. Those are the kind of friendships I want. I want to interact with people that way. Oh don't get me wrong. Internet buddies are all great. But I need to mingle and really be with people. Hobbies, sadly, no. Write, read, draw. I write a good bit actually. I have two diaries, a blog and a book of lists. I'm not comfortable if I don't have a spare notebook. Reading isn't my thing. My reading comprehension is where my brain damage really shows up. Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter fan though. Don't worry. Also Little Women. Draw? I make attempts but coloring is my creative outlet. I am a movie watcher for sure. But my body really doesn't like sitting for hours. My back is starting to really scream at me and I don't know what for. I rarely make origami. By rare, I mean once a year. I like to use my hands. I loooove to type. Building Legos is fabulous. But once you finish the thing, it's super hard to tear apart. It stays that way. Yes, great. But you can't take it apart without frustration, anger and injury. Perler beads are amazing. I have sooo so many pins on my boards of doing stuff. But they all require supplies that I don't have. Time,yes. Money and car to get them, no. If you like Younger, definitely check out The Mindy Project. If you're more for the drama than the comedy, I recommend Faking It (not sure if geared towards a younger audience, but that doesn't stop me).
I enjoy reading other people's writing works, do you have any links or can you tell me the name of your blog? I would love to check it out. :]
Do you prefer the Lord of the Rings movies or books? Sadly I didn't finish the books (school got in the way at the time), but I do enjoy the movies a great deal.
When I don't feel like drawing, I like those zen coloring pages. I'm almost finished with one I've been working on the past month <3 If you can, definitely try them out!
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Posted: Thu May 26, 2016 10:48 pm
Yo, fellow disabled person here- though I'm physically disabled with a personality disorder. I know the feeling of forcefully being a hermit. It sucks. It sucks big time. I live with my parents, and I live in a basement apartment all by myself. Used to have a fiance that I started dating prior to my illness, but he left me in december after 8 years because of my disability and personality disorder. Dude was an a**. What else is new. I feel like I'll be alone forever some days now for the same reasons. It is a lot of baggage to ask someone else to deal with. But I'm also kind of sure I'll meet someone who's not a douche and will accept the whole disabled with a personality disorder thing.
Being stuck in the house is hugely boring though. I stay busy with tv, movies, music, and my plethora of pets. Idk, can you play an instrument? That's pretty time consuming. If not, my friends say ukuleles are easy to learn and pretty dang cheap.
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Posted: Thu May 26, 2016 10:57 pm
I'm nearly housebound at the moment (finally got a diagnosis of MCAS last December, trying to make up for 15+ years of illness), and struggling to keep up with what was already a meager social life. Plus I had social anxiety to begin with, so... gonk
My spare time has turned into odd hobbies, mostly animal-related, and the best friends I have are people I've met through groups like the local herpetological society. All we had in common at first were snakes and geckos, but it turned out we had the same favorite movies and bands, similar political views, and other mutual interests. I wish I could spend more time with them in person.
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Posted: Thu May 26, 2016 11:33 pm
i like Mindy. She has the same body shape as me. She's funny too. I'm on Wordpress as greens23 or 24. I forget. Well, for me theyre very much the same but diverse also. It's unfair to pick one over the other. Movies and books are so totally different. Oh, I have like 10 coloring books. I'm good on those.
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Posted: Thu May 26, 2016 11:47 pm
Friday_Dora I'm nearly housebound at the moment (finally got a diagnosis of MCAS last December, trying to make up for 15+ years of illness), and struggling to keep up with what was already a meager social life. Plus I had social anxiety to begin with, so... gonk My spare time has turned into odd hobbies, mostly animal-related, and the best friends I have are people I've met through groups like the local herpetological society. All we had in common at first were snakes and geckos, but it turned out we had the same favorite movies and bands, similar political views, and other mutual interests. I wish I could spend more time with them in person. oooh. Never heard of personality disorder. Hmm...beh. Don't have people to have common interests.
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Posted: Fri May 27, 2016 8:35 am
OK, you're disabled. You made that abundantly clear. Now what are you going to do about it? All I'm saying is, don't let it control your life. I've met lots of disabled people throughout my life and they were all very capable of being something other than their disability. Don't let it define you.
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Posted: Fri May 27, 2016 4:50 pm
The thing is with a disability, you don't have to love it. You don't even have to like it. It doesn't define you. You just have to adapt to life with it. Even with a disability you can accomplish things and live a very fulfilling life. I have a mental disability that means at 26 years old I can't tell the time on an analogue clock, my memory is absolutely terrible and it takes me a while to connect a consequence with an action, but I'm on my way to graduating college.
Sometimes you might need people to help you out, but it doesn't mean you have to live life as a hermit. Around here there are groups for disabled people to get to know each other and do all sorts of things, so hopefully there might be one near you.
The first thing you need to ask yourself, is there anything you really want to do?
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Posted: Sun May 29, 2016 7:32 pm
NARS Persia
OK, you're disabled. You made that abundantly clear. Now what are you going to do about it? All I'm saying is, don't let it control your life. I've met lots of disabled people throughout my life and they were all very capable of being something other than their disability. Don't let it define you.
but it does control my life. Do you expect me to just remove it or be ashamed? Or do you see me as victim and playing for sympathy?? People can see me however they wish. I like how I see myself. There are things I can't do and things I need help with. It's annoying, but that's just how it goes. I can't do anything about those parts. What can I do something about? My attitude towards the situation. This is why it's good to talk to a person before judging them. Your question was what can I do? I am limited. But I can do anything I want. I just have problems finding out what I want in life. It's a brain damage thing and there's really nothing I can do about that. So why feel bad about it? Yea it sucks. But what can I do? I don't know. My brain damage is part of me. There's no way to disentangle the two of us. I have my moments but I take great pride in it. There is no Sarah without the damage. It does define me. What can I do? Deal with it. Just like being a woman. Life: you are female. Me: ok Life: you are disabled and special needs. Me: ok
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Posted: Sun May 29, 2016 7:47 pm
AngelBiscuits The thing is with a disability, you don't have to love it. You don't even have to like it. It doesn't define you. You just have to adapt to life with it. Even with a disability you can accomplish things and live a very fulfilling life. I have a mental disability that means at 26 years old I can't tell the time on an analogue clock, my memory is absolutely terrible and it takes me a while to connect a consequence with an action, but I'm on my way to graduating college. Sometimes you might need people to help you out, but it doesn't mean you have to live life as a hermit. Around here there are groups for disabled people to get to know each other and do all sorts of things, so hopefully there might be one near you. The first thing you need to ask yourself, is there anything you really want to do? I'm still trying to come up with answers to that. I live in farmland. There's nothing for a person unless your a farmer. This town's lifeblood was oil and an icehouse that is now overgrown. There's nothing for me around here, but it's cheap and mom grew up here. I can't do anything without her consent. She's my legal guardian. I'm a very "go out on the town" person. Mom is a homebody. My disability is well taken care of. We're set up. But I don't like it. I'm very social and mom's just not. I'm unable to attend college and there are no groups. It's just an unfortunate spot for a social person. You're right. You don't have to like your disability, but you do have to deal with it.
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Posted: Thu Jun 02, 2016 9:29 am
Is there any kind of transport system for people with disabilities in your area? Some places have those sort of taxis that can be called to help someone disabled get where they want to go. I've heard good things about the system from a few of my friends. But it sounds like you're in a small town, so there might not be one. Still, something to look into. That way you can join a club or something and see people besides the people you live with
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