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 Posted: Tue May 17, 2016 9:30 pm
Hey guys. Im beyond sexually confused. Ive been straight my whole life but have experienced a horrific interaction with a very evil guy I once trusted and his friends. The best way I can describe it is that I feel ive been emotionally raped. I dont think I will heal from the cruel way he treated me because it was and is abuse on every level.
I have found myself feeling a girl would never do that to me. The degree of violence he directs at me is horribe and its caused me to feel unsafe with men.im a very feminine soul. Is it possible to choose to be lesbian after experience with male violence?
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Posted: Tue May 17, 2016 10:48 pm
A psychological trauma can cause you to be afraid of entire gender, but in the end that wont necessarily make you gay, rather more open to the idea. In the end, when dating, you just have to genuinely care about someone and of course them back. But as for your sexuality as a whole if you identify as strait, you may not physically like a woman.
Remember that romantic and sexual orientation are two different things. If you feel open to dating someone of the same gender then go for it, but if you don't feel sexually attracted to them that's okay. You can be Bi-romantic, but heterosexual...and remember, everyone has a chance at someone being an "exception" you may just find a girl you feel safe and love them mentally and physically.
Just take care of yourself, take it slow, one step at a time. Don't rush into anything, take your time so that you may discover yourself, your boundaries, and your identity.
Take care of yourself hun, we are here for you emotion_bigheart
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Posted: Wed May 18, 2016 12:22 am
Sheriff_Caitlyn A psychological trauma can cause you to be afraid of entire gender, but in the end that wont necessarily make you gay, rather more open to the idea. In the end, when dating, you just have to genuinely care about someone and of course them back. But as for your sexuality as a whole if you identify as strait, you may not physically like a woman. Remember that romantic and sexual orientation are two different things. If you feel open to dating someone of the same gender then go for it, but if you don't feel sexually attracted to them that's okay. You can be Bi-romantic, but heterosexual...and remember, everyone has a chance at someone being an "exception" you may just find a girl you feel safe and love them mentally and physically. Just take care of yourself, take it slow, one step at a time. Don't rush into anything, take your time so that you may discover yourself, your boundaries, and your identity. Take care of yourself hun, we are here for you emotion_bigheart Thank you for this great information Caitlyn ^.^ Yes, I think I feel fear toward men because of what happened. I also feel hatred toward myself at times for being female. I am not sexually attracted to women but I do see beauty in all women. I also admire women physically and emotionally. I am sexually attracted to men but they also scare me now. I love what you wrote about exceptions. I do believe that. In fact, I have experienced this I think. Thank you for telling me to take my time and that you guys are here for me heart
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Posted: Sat May 28, 2016 7:48 am
lesbianism can definitely be a form of self-care
your feelings are valid even if they are a reaction to trauma
i encourage you to explore the many positive aspects of loving and being loved by women
if that turns out to not be your thing, then maybe you just need to take a break from relationships in general for a while.
i know its hard to feel forced to go one way or the other, but just remember that you come first. healing takes time and patience and exploration
and who knows, maybe you'll find out men arent so bad after all. it may take time though
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