[Solo] We don't have to wait anymore. [ Ren x Tsu ][Fin]

[Chi Sohma]

I'd be under the sea, but you hold me above...

[ Text Count: 1,721 ]

 

[Chi Sohma]

It had been some years’ time since she had seen her mother, it reminded Rennoa of the Kimi's departure. That feeling nearly killed her, but unlike Kimi, she didn't think her mother would come back. Not after leaving so many times during their childhood but now for years straight. The worst of it, was when her mother had been around, she had shown them a bountiful amount of love when she was around, it made it even more heartbreaking when she would leave.

Yes, Rennoa and her siblings knew of their half siblings but the constant separation had made them numb but that didn’t apply to their father. No matter how long it took her to come around, their father would wait for her, greet her with a smile and all the love of the world like he had done to his children and others. It was as if his loneliness had disappeared completely when she came back and the problems they had to face before her arrival seemed meaningless. That was love. That, was a suffocating love. One that straggled you and pulled you in to the sea and would watch you drown without a second thought. That was the kind of love that killed.

When the pain was too great, they would run to their father. He had always been in the same place, waiting. No matter how much Rennoa tried to budge him to come live with them, he wouldn’t. ‘What if she came back, and he wasn’t there? She would be lonely?’ It was heartbreaking each time she would hear the same excuse, and even then, he would smile while saying so. It reminded her of when Kimi had left, the denial, the grieving, and the thought he would never come back, then letting him go. In some ways, she saw her resemblance of her father and of how in love he was with their mother. The only difference, was that Ren moved on in the physical sense, but her heart had remained with the departed one. Just like her father. When Kimi returned, she was finally able to get her heart back, and give it to her love. Finally, she was able to move on, and that was what she wanted for her father…

The sound of the waves crashing.

All Ren could see was a muzzle trying to gasp for air in the distance, the tide had pulled Tsu in and swallowed him. Fire had burned the sands beneath her as she nearly flew in to the water, getting thrashed around by the sea. “FATHER!” She screamed rabidly as her arms flailed then dived in after him.
As he twirled within the tide, and thrashed about.

His paws began to fight any way he could to find where ‘up’ was. Disorientated, lost, and exhausted from fighting the waves, his paws began to slow down. His anxiety nearly ceased, his body jerked as the air began to dissipate from his lungs. When he finally looked up, his paw raised, the surface was above him but he hadn’t the energy to move. He jerked again when the last bit of air left his lungs. He had forgotten how to swim. For a moment he saw his life flash through his eyes. Kirara… His children… His friends… his friends children… and finally Sobie. He had cared about Sobie, and began to need his company, was it because he was lonely? Because he was thrown away? But he loved Kirara, he couldn’t betray those emotions and it would be better if he did die here… than destroy what they had.

When he drew his last breath in his lungs, his eye rolled back and his patch slowly untied and floated above him… The turmoil he felt would finally end. If this life, it was hers, even if it killed him.

The world began to feel lighter and there the vision of a shadow at the end of the way… Looking back at him then disappearing.

Finally she found him, grabbing him from the scruff as she began to pad as hard as she could to the surface.
 

[Chi Sohma]

How she got out of the waves, was a mystery, even to her. He was so deep within the waves, and how many had overtaken her and thrashed her about as she held on to him for dear life. Multiple times they went under, yet still she pushed on to get them out of the water. It was by miracle that she could feel the sand beneath her feet and immediately she pushed further til finally she could back out to shore and dragged with her the huge body of her father. He was a lot lighter than she had ever known, and now that the water flattened his fur down, he was incredibly skinny. Immediately when they were out of the tide’s reach, she turned and jumped on top of him. CPR, the best way she could, and how he had taught her before. Pushing all of her weight on to his chest.

“father-!” Exhausted. “father!” Pushing her weight on his chest again. “Wake up! Wake up! Come on dad please!” Breathing in to him continuously and this went on for the longest few minutes of her life. “Don’t DIE ON ME!”
He was free, until he was jerked back in to life. Something, someone was pulling me on the other side of the beach. Where the woods were. To he, he knew that this was the heaven of sailors. The sound, the beautiful sound of a siren’s song… Tsu’s ears went back. He was happy. Free… But when he tried to take a step forward, it weighed too much to move. He looked around, and behind him was an image, a strong one.

“Is this the way to go, young pirate?”

He couldn’t move his body.

“What do you mean?”

The shadow shook it’s head.

“Do you believe this where you want your path shall end?”

Tsu didn’t respond.

“I remember a time where you did not stop at nothing. Now, you have given up.”

Tsu looked back at the water…

“You can fall her in to the ocean… or. You can go back to the land. Which do you choose.”

Tsu went to make a decision before he heard his daughter’s voice. Ren.
He looked around.

“Everyone’s time expires someday. This is nature, you should understand. If you believe you have nothing else left on land. Go… seek the siren.”

’Don’t DIE ON ME!’

Her voice… He turned around and began walking towards the ocean. Feeling the cool water against his paws. He could feel the sensation going in to his brain and felt his memories begin to dissipate… Was this, death?
Then he was about to jump in to the water- the water turned in to the most precious memories… They were leaving him. Then he realized what was happening. ‘No- NO! NO!’ His memories began to ripple. He turned around in panic. The image of Sobie came upon one ripple, and he began to try and grab on to him and hold it. What is the cost of the freedom that death could offer? Is it worth, your memories?

“Where are they going- I don’t want to-“ Trying to grab on to the water where his memories were slipping through his fingertips.

“I thought you wanted to die?”

“I don’t want to forget! No! Take me back to land!” He yelled.

 

[Chi Sohma]

He was shot back in to his body, and his breath joined his daughter’s as he coughed up a huge amount of water, nearly choking on it as he gasped for the air once more. Ren’s tears had fallen and even more so when he lived. Throwing her arms around him as she cried on his chest. She hadn’t done so since she was but a young child was a horrible secret.

“Father- I thought you died!”

He was disorientated, and splotches of different colors painted his sight. Shaking his head and beginning to breath on his own.

“Why did you go in to the waves like that! You know it’s low tide and the currents are wild!! WHY!”

“I don't know...” But deep down, he knew.

More tears came… “Please. Come with me to our home, we will take care of you, you don’t have to be alone here.”

“Your mother-“

The very moment, Ren snapped, and with every fiber of her being she screamed. This was the reason he couldn’t move on, this was the reason she could not move on, and she looked dead in the face to the man who raised and loved them. Harboring the same amount of pain she had. For once, maybe she could teach him something.

“SHE IS NEVER COMING BACK DAD! Don’t you… get it.” Shaking her head. Her heart was breaking to have to tell him. Grabbing on to his chest… She hadn’t ever seen her father cry, and this time…

He did. Tears fell from his eyes, the paled white one too. Curling his paws around her, one a white sock, and the other, nub, for his peg leg must have come off during the tussle of the currents.

“I need to stay… for her… what else do I have?”

Grabbing on to him once more, she let out a cry that caused a spark of flame to flare from her maw.

“YOU HAVE US! YOU HAVE SOBIE! YOU HAVE MY SONS AND DAUGHTERS WHO LOVE YOU!” Shaking her head. “You can’t sit here waiting for her all of your life! Damnit father!” She yelled at him once more. “You CAN’T WAIT ANYMORE! SHE HAS LEFT FOR YEARS! YOU CAN’T GO ON LIKE THIS! WE CAN’T SEE YOU LIKE THIS ANYMORE! IT HURTS!”

He held her tighter. All he could reply is with tears. The fear of letting her go, the fear letting go was nearly too much to bare. Enough to have him want to go in to the sea.

“You are hurting those who love you..” She whispered in to his ear.

He didn’t want those memories to fade. He didn’t want to forget.


 

[Chi Sohma]

“I remember… one day… I was but a child then.” She started.

“You held me close, and my tears seemed endless and my heart… was shattered in more pieces than I could count.” She continued.

"I loved so much and when my love went away. You held me close, and said to me that I would find a new love one day, and if it is true, they would never leave me, to wipe my tears so they don't ever have to see me cry, and lift my head high. You told me that dad... you told me I had to let them go, because love doesn't hurt this bad! Love doesn't make you want to die with it!" All her tails had sunk low without emotion. In times of great emotion, fire would spout from their tips, but even then, they had no life to them which to spark.

"We can let this go, in our hearts, we can let them go- we have those which would love us to the fullest. We don't have to cry anymore... we are not lonely. We have love, daddy... We have those who love us, but if we go on like this... we will shut them out, and what then would we have left...?" Slowly she crawled to his head, and lifted it, as her tails found their way beneath him. Softly pawing his face.

"It hurts so bad it's unbearable, but my once love, I forgive him, he forgives me..because it wasn't meant to be, and it was time to let go so we could see those around us who really love us, in a way that no one else could... I believe in love that heals and I don't want you to die of a broken heart, I want you to live to the fullest with someone who loves you, and together you can pick up the pieces...." Pawing his face and looking down at him.

Tsukouru could feel the subtle tears upon his face now. He was crying, and it seemed like he was in and out of consciousness but he did hear her, and felt every word. It was painful, and unbearable but he could feel her share her pain with him, and rise him up from the water he had drowned in, not only physically but mentally. He came back for his memories, but he knew he had lost some, because although the pain was even greater knowing that parts of his memories with her were gone, and the eminent decision on letting her go, was his only option.

How long had it been since he seen her face, he couldn't...remember...

"We can... let go..."

Ren's ears perked up, and she rose her head in surprise. A smile reached ear to ear as she curled her arms around his head.

"Yes... daddy... we can."

"Water..."

"Woah! Yes- I'll get you fresh water, stay here!" Laying his head down in to the sand as she ran off.

Tears dried entirely too quick, it was the sand within his fur that soaked it up. Was this what it meant, to let it go... He lifted his good paw ( his nub paw ) in to the air, when he did, he felt something leave him...Something immense and heavy, left and the only thing he could feel now, was the wind within his fur, and the scent of the sea.