[Taken from Gdocs]

Zoe craned her neck to look up at the large building… probably the biggest building she had ever seen. Not in like height, as it was only one story. She had seen grand tall skyscrapers, and stadiums and theatres, but this building just covered an astounding amount of land. She popped an altoid into her mouth and offered the little tin to her room mate, who had suggested they go shopping, or at least browsing some new furniture.

So, like all people who needed s**t for their homes but didn't want to spend every time to their name, they had headed to Ikea. Zoe had never been to an Ikea, and she wondered that if in the pinch of a zombie apocalypse, that civilization could start over again within the confines of this building, with all the amenities of home only some assembly away.

It was a thought to keep in mind. Zoe had seen some weird s**t, so a zombie apocalypse wasn't as far fetched as some of the other stuff that she knew was very real. As it were she walked through the sliding automatic doors marked with a very blunt “in” and peered around curiously “ you ever been here before, Elijah? “ She said, once again letter her accent have its way with her name.

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Ikea was a prime choice for furniture despite the amount of money his grandparents gave him. Apparently all this time that he had been paying rent to them, they had been saving it for when he decided to move out. He had been paying them a base of $300.00 every month for rent since he was 17 and held his first job working at a Safeway. Shafty old people, they never seemed to surprise him with their kindness and he was so grateful to be raised by them.

Eli blinked when he heard his name, ignoring the shiver that ran through him, glaring slightly at the short female beside him. Did she have to keep doing that? “Yes, I've been here plenty of times...What rock do you live under that you haven't?” He wasn't trying to be a d**k, but damn….How could she NOT step foot inside an Ikea? It's like the poor man's version of Sears or MOR.

He grabbed the catalogue that was resting in a neat pile and a cart. He wanted to stay under 1k since they didn't need too much but a lot at the same time. Eli was hoping to save up some more money from his job to get a car. That seemed like the next best step for him. “What do we need the most?” His voice was a casual cool as he addressed Zoe, pushing the cart with a bored look on his face. Hopefully, no one would notice the awkward couple while they talked.

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“ A very very controlling rock that thought offspring were for seeing, not hearing, and certainly had no choice in the furniture in the home. Heck I didn't even get to pick my own pillow cases. “ She said offhandedly, sounding a little distracted as she herself plucked up a catalog and flipped through it curiously. Anything she owned had been second hand from a pawn shop or goodwill, or reclaimed from the office junk when Jason had given her the office studio.

She thought about it for a moment “ Well, My first thought would be maybe one of those shelf things? Ya know the wire ones so you can hang things? No closet, and the things I have are just in studs with cup-hooks. But your main concern is probably a decent set of bunk beds. “ She said, chomping her altoid into oblivion. “ I don't mind sharing the futon though. You keep your hands mostly to yourself “ She said with a grin, and under her breath she said something that sounded like pity, but strolled on into the store, keeping fairly close to him, because while she had a little bit of money, she had just payed up several months rent with the last big gig check she had received.

So, no rent was truly due for a while, but she was little in the ways of pocket change, so Troll was also the purse today.

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Ah...He supposed he could understand that.

“Yes...bunk bed….We do need that.”

He turned to her with a frown when he thought he heard Zoe muttering but didn't pursue whatever she was grumbling about. Far be it for him to actually care at this point. He was on a mission to gain his own bed and separate octopus limbs from him...He did not want to deal with unwanted surprises from his lower half everytime Zoe decided to get cuddly. Eli tried not to look overly uncomfortable with her this close, making sure to keep a pace she could follow with those short legs of hers [that were VERY soft he had to admit to this like a man], and so she wouldn't get lost in the crowd.

When they finally made it to the bedroom section, Eli stopped and pulled the cart to the side, gesturing to the various bunk bed frames available. “Take a look around, just try not to be overly expensive….”

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Zoe looked like a kid on Christmas morning really. She had never been furniture shopping before, and it was a new and exciting experience. She talked into the rows of faux bedrooms set up, which would have been creepy if she wasn't having so much fun. Or maybe that’s WHY it was so much fun. It was like walking into someone's house and getting to survey all of their stuff, only there was no chance of getting arrested here.

She looked from frame to frame, passing from one “room” to the next, not exactly sticking to Eli’s side and bypassing frames that were clearly meant for children. It would seem the “dorm” section was more what they were looking for, sometimes even with futons on the bottom instead of a traditional bed. That way it could maybe double as a sofa during the day? She was getting ready to turn back around a corner back into the section that Eli was still loitering in, when she caught sight of a couple walking towards them, the man talking quietly to his petite wife, and not exactly noticing her.

s**t s**t s**t s**t s**t. Zoe ducked back into the section where Eli was quickly, the normally calm and flirty girl covered with a look of panic and her hands buried in her hair. Maybe if they walked quickly they could just leave without being seen. It was a big store. you know what. They didn't need furniture. Eli could have the bed. She would sleep on the floor. It was cool. It would be like camping. But indoors. Yeah, the floor was juuuuuust fine. Her mind was bouncing around like crazy as she walked quickly back up to Eli.

Eli couldn't resist a smile watching his room mate wander off like an excited child. He only casually followed her, looking at some of the bed choices himself, taking note of one awesome [and space effective] futon bed that would suit his tall frame and budget just fine. He was about to send Zoe a text when he saw the girl walking towards him with her hands in her hair.

Eli didn't speak, he just waited to see if she would say what was wrong.

Did she hit her head or something? Seems likely…

“We can get this one if you want…” said the almost always monotone voice. He wasn't without feelings, just didn't voice them all that often.

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Zoes eyes snapped up to him “ You know what, we don't need furniture! ILL BUY YOU SOMETHING NICE NEXT WEEKEND, I GET PAID ‘ She laughed nervously, and basically looped her arm through his and was getting ready to drag him towards the entrance when a group of people came in, and eye balling some of the master beds on the other side of the isle, blocked their way.

“ s**t “ She muttered. She could hear them coming closer. That distinct accent, stronger than her own, the whispery responses of the woman. A feeling of defeat filled her, and she looked up at her tall friend, and her eyes narrowed, and then wander down over him to his feet and back up again, and she flicked her eyes to the way she had just come over to him. If he looked really hard he probably could have seen a light bulb turn on over her head.

“ I don’t have time to explain, but I need you to do something VERY IMPORTANT for me. Like, the most important thing I'm ever going to ask of you. Just play along “ She said, with a resolute nod at him.

And without giving him time to respond, she sort of… hopped at him. and hooked one leg around his waist. For being such a small girl, she had very strong legs, because she got all the way up to face level with him, sort of koala-holding onto him, put her hands on either side of her face, and leaned over him, planting an extremely passionate kiss on her room mate.

Just in time for a couple to walk around the corner, not elderly, but past their prime, in their mid to late fifties. A man with a mop of blue curls atop his head, followed by a tiny woman who looked like she was of mixed asian descent, with vivid blue eyes that matched Zoes.

They stopped dead in their tracks.

Zoe broke her kiss, and slid her arms languorously around his neck and shoulders “ Let's get the big one, I like it best “ She practically purred out the words.

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Okay clearly something was wrong, but he really didn't want to pry at all so he simply blinked slowly and quirked an eyebrow even as she was trying to drag him away. Uhhhhhh, no….He wanted to get the bunk bed now damn it! He was tired of waking up with a terrible back in the morning and he really didn't want to share the bed with Zoe for his own personal reasons. Eli was about to give her a talking when he heard something familiar.

Where could he place it though?

He didn't even register the “just play along” that should've came his way before he felt weight, legs, hands on the side of his face then lips. Eli’s eyes widened and instead of pushing her off like he was trying to will his body to do, he simply responded back with twice as much passion, arms coming around to hook themselves in her hair. He didn't even notice the middle aged couple that was literally right in front of them. He looked at her with a slight haze in his eyes looking every bit the proposed sex god his friend and co-worker claimed him to be. His answer came out breathy and a bit husky.

“Y-yeah, sure…”

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Zoe smiled at him with a passion to match his own, and gently touched his nose with her own in an innocent little nuzzle, with what seemed to be genuine affection. She was acting… right? It was impossible to tell, honestly, with the way she was looking at him. “ you spoil me “

She gave him another gentle kiss and loosened her leg so she slid down the front of him till her foot touched the ground, and she unhooked herself, still leaning heavily against him and sliding a hand around his waist like a thousand other couples she seen on a daily basis, turning to look very intently at the ornate cherry-wood sleigh bed on the other side of the isle from the bunk beds that they had come here to look at.

She did feign surprise when she saw the couple staring at her, the man’s creamy coloured face flushed red with rage, but he said nothing and turned around, stomping off the way they had came, dragging his tiny wife behind him, the woman still looking at zoe with eyeballs wide and startled.

Zoe visibly relaxed once they were out of sight, a sigh leaving her in a rush and practically slumping against him, resting her forehead against his chest, as if by not looking at the store for a moment she could have just a private moment to collect the bits of her scattered brain.

Well.. that had been really fun. And she was only being partially sarcastic.

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The nose nuzzle is what caught Eli off guard, but he slowly returned to his usuall self, arms still holding her as she slid down. He didnt know what came over his roommate, but he would do to be more careful next time. Gotta watch them temptations after all. Once again, he was about to ask her what the ******** was going on when he followed her gaze and put two and two together.

Oh.

That must be her parents.

This makes more sense now.

Eli was starting to turn red, but not out of embarrassment for once. He could tolerate being jabbed at for his attitude and lack of sexual experience, but he DID NOT appreciate being used as a ploy for some girl to piss her parents off for some rebellious reason or the other. Once he saw that her parents were gone, he dropped his arms to his side and made his way calmly over to the bunk bed they were supposed to get, jotting down the number and waiting for Zoe to catch up with his back turned to her.

Grab the bed, a bit more furniture, and they were getting out of here where he was going to set up said furniture then get the hell out of dodge for a bit. Maybe he would go swimming in the cold a** water, he didn't know...All he wanted to do was vent some frustration and maybe punt a kitten or two.

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Zoe could tell he was mad. Not because he said anything, but because he was indeed so calm. He didn’t say ANYTHING. Which made her very nervous. In her split second decision, she had come to terms with the thought of having to deal with him angry and yelling at her, but she had absolutely no idea how to handle this silent anger that radiated out of him, calm and quiet.

So she sort of strolled behind him, aloof and casual on the outside as normal, but on the inside she was tense; very confused, much nervous. She sat silently in Brian's car after the furniture was loaded…. waiting… cautiously side eyeing him on the drive home.

“ Sooo…. wanna get some dinner? “ It was the most neutral thing she could think of, and the silence WAS KILLING HER. SHE WAS DYING.

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Eli wasn't hungry, and he really wanted to get home as soon as possible so he could fix their furniture and go out. “No.” was all he said while he drove them up to the house, parked and got out. The furniture was heavy, but it wasn't anything he needed help with so he grabbed what he could and made his way towards their home without saying a word.

She would know that he wasn't the one to be toyed with quite early on.

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Zoe flinched internally at his single word reply, and had to physically fight to not hunch her shoulders. Why was this bothering her so much? So he was angry with her. Big deal. She upset people left and right, it was sort of like breathing for her. She blinked as he hauled pretty much ALL of the furniture on his own. How could she forget what a large individual he was? Sure she lived in close proximity to him, but he didn't really throw his bulk around, and he treaded lightly so sometimes it was easy to forget ( as unlikely as that seemed when he was so large and she was so small ) that he was very very strong.

So she picked up what was left; One measly lamp and some towels because the ones she had, while they swallowed her up like a blanket, barely stretched around his hips. While that had delighted Zoe to no end, Eli had NOT been pleased.

She followed him quietly up the stairs in what would probably be considered her version of meek, and shut the door behind them, watching him set furniture down and started tearing into various boxes.

She leaned against the door and watched him in silence for a moment, still holding a bundle of towels in front of her.

“ …...I’m sorry “ She said quietly.

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Eli was already frowning at the instructions for putting together the bunk bed when he heard Zoe apologize. As much as he liked to think of himself as this stiff d**k that didn't really have a heart, it was the exact opposite. Instead of ignoring her and carrying on with his little project, Eli sighed and looked to her with his usual glare. “Apology accepted….” he grumbled. “******** hobbit….” with that, he turned to begin the task of putting their new bed together.

He hopped she wasn't expecting any warm fuzzy hugs or some pansy a** s**t like that, he wasn't a cuddle bear…

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Zoe smiled at him, and chucked the towels onto the computer chair, walking over and flopping down to the floor beside him.

To bad Eli, because zoe WAS a pansy… well kinda. She gave him a smacking kiss on the cheek “ Grumpy troll <3 “ and turned to the assorted parts of their furniture, helping where she could as they got the inner workings of their home set up.