Here you will find entries in Rasiel's locked journal that will be transferred into his Student Journal once the plot reveals his role in the current story.
There's messed up stuff in here, so it's probably best you don't read it. >___>;;;;
Posted: Sat Jan 23, 2016 5:04 pm
Sick Of The Lies
Delilah had returned alone to the main building after putting the two young children to sleep in their room in the dormitories. She entered the Headmaster's office where Rhun was sitting alone at the desk filling out paperwork. She closed the door behind her and approached, looking down at his bandaged hands, confirming her suspicions immediately. Her stare grew cold with a twinge of anger. "Explain."
Rhun's eyes glinted upward to look at Delilah, "Oh, Delilah, did you find what I asked you for?" he wasn't sure what she was talking about so he continued the conversation anyway. "It will help with the research about Mane's and Malices."
"....no." She reached into her bag, pulling out a book and tossing it haphazardly on the desk.
He was confused by her actions. "No? What's wrong?" he looked concerned but mostly perplexed.
She pointed her finger at his hands.
"Oh this? I was just-.."
"Liar." she didn't have to let him finish to know he was about to lie to her.
Rhun's eyes became stern and he exhaled, his eyes showing the pain he had been hiding. He stood and approached Delilah, "Delilah, you don't understand..."
Delilah eyes narrowed hard as she let her hand fly, smacking the taller man hard across the face. "Don't!" she commanded while her stature stayed completely calm. How dare he. Of course she understood. And this was just another test just as she had with Melody.
Rhun instinctively gritted his teeth and drew back his hand to retaliate.
"...you're despicable.." she spoke suddenly, her eyes filled with anger.
Rhun's eyes widened as he halted, looking over to his hand about to hit her. He drew back, scared at his own actions. Her words had hit deep enough that his eyes darted around. Unsure of what to do and what to say. "Delilah,... I"
"No! Y-you listen.. h-here!" she started in, "This h-has to.. s-stop!" she was direct as she took a step forward. "You-... you think you c-can hide... b-behind a mask... a-and think y-you can r-run from y-your s-shame... like t-that!" she was really letting him have it. Rhun had remained silent, taking in her words as she approached. Delilah pointed a finger in his face. "H-how dare y-you!" she exclaimed.
"I'm sorry.."
"Y-you don't.. g-get to just.. s-say sorry, Rasiel!"
Rhun's eyes widened, looking at her as his stomach churned. She knew? How long had she known? Did she think he was a murderer too?
"I-I... thought... y-you were trying... t-to r-redeem yourself... f-for her! B-but u-underneath.. that m-mask... y-you're s-still just a-as much a c-coward... as the d-day you r-ran away. I c-can't believe y-you! H-how can you e-except to help o-others when you a-are becomg s-something worse than t-the demons that p-possessed us..."
His voice went low, showing his true shame, "It's a long story, Delilah..." he sighed, fighting back tears from beneath his mask. "A lot happened.... I never meant to.."
"W-what kind of m-monster are y-you if y-you can't even k-keep your a-angry from your l-loved ones?! D-did you h-hit him?"
"I was.."
"DID YOU HIT HIM?"
"No. I just... I scared him. Which is probably worse... "
"I-if.. you e-ever let... t-that anger... g-get out of c-control a-again... I won't h-hesitate t-to stop you m-myself..." she threatened.
"I understand." he replied solemnly, how pathetic was he to get scolded so badly by the girl he once raised. But what she said was right, he needed to control his anger. He wasn't even sure he could anymore. He sighed, as he brought a hand up to his cheek to feel the sting of where her hand had hit him.
Delilah turned on her heel to leave, reaching out to the hand to open it but paused. Without turning to look at him, she spoke. "D-do you r-really think.. p-people are g-going to b-be stupid e-enough to n-not do b-basic math and f-figure out that Melody i-isn't Alice's?"
Rhun hesitated, he was bad at lying, and it was painfully obvious that this was one of those badly made lies.
"Y-you should t-tell him t-the truth..."
"I can't. He won't-... What if he leaves?"
"T-then he l-leaves... W-who are you t-to stop him?"
"His b-... His ex."
Delilah gave a little snort at what he almost said. "y-you really are s-something else.... i c-cant believe y-you are going to d-do this to h-him again...y-you don't e-even know w-what you're g-getting into... R-rasiel... Y-you are a mess..." she scowled lightly as she turned the handle, opened the door and left.
Rhun was left alone to think, never a good thing. His anger already welling up as he swung his arm, knocking over the desk lamp into the floor. He sat down in the chair behind the desk and shoved his face into his hands.
You're pathetic.
Delilah had only stood outside the door as she heard the crash of the lamp hitting the floor. She sighed, her eyes growing sad as she stared at the ground. Maybe she didn't understand what the Malice's really did to their hosts. She had wanted to mention the Mane inside Melody, but she chose not to. She didn't know what she should do, but in the mean time she'd have to keep a close eye on the two of them. Rasiel had changed. She now understood why he was Rhun, and the distinction between the two.
Rasiel walked the streets of a city he barely knew, he'd spent the better part of the last three years trying to hide. His face markings and wings more than gave him away no matter where he went however. He was known by everyone as a murderer. A monster that killed his own sister. Even all the way out here near the deserts he had spent a lot of time in, he could no longer find a place he could call safe.He went to the only place he knew would not turn him away, the one person in this world that would be more than happy to have him.
His arm was broken from his last scuffle, he knew they'll find him soon enough if he didn't act quickly. Knocking on the door, his gaze shifted to scan the area to make sure he wasn't being followed. The building looked pretty abandoned but he was sure she was here. The townspeople had already started to murmur about her existence within the city. She was never one to hide herself, always being pretty flashy about her presence. It felt like an eternity before the door pried open ajar and a set of slender yellow eyes peered back at him from the darkness within. If he looked hard, he could tell the figure was already grinning at his presence.
"P-please...I..." he winced slightly as he had tensed slightly at the sight of her and it was causing his arm to coarse with excrutiating pain.
"...there will be plenty of time to beg... come inside..." the female voice beckoned and the door opened wider. Rasiel slowly stepped into the building, the darkness obscuring his vision as he tried to get his eyes to adjust. Where did she go? He grasped at his arm as he whipped his head around to search for her.
"...I have to say... I'm surprised to see you so soon... What brings you here?" the voice seemed to come from all around.
"...make me... more human.." he asked, the pain was really starting to get to him as he was getting pretty light headed. Something suddenly grabbed his working arm and twisted it behind his back hard as the force knocked him face first to the ground, he cried out as the a surge of pain shot from his broken arm.
"You don't get to demand anything of me." her voice was different as Rasiel struggled to turn his head to look at her as she came to sit against his back, leaning against him forcefully. As her face came into view, Rasiel's eyes widened, being stared in the face by his sister, Alice. The girl leaned in close next to his ear and whispered, "..beg me for it.."
"Please... i beg you... to make me more human.." he begged as his voice cracked from strain.
"You can do better." her grin grew wider as she pushed up on his arm with increasing force.
Rasiel let out a scream as the bone itself threatened to break from the tension. "Please! I'll do anything! AHh!" he screamed out.
The smile faded from her face as she stopped pushing, but kept his arm twisted. "This is no fun if you give in so easily." she commented, paused, then the grin returned. "Maybe you need something to fight for..." she snapped the fingers of her free hand and a manifestation of Deskri walked out from the shadows before them.
"Deskri..... Stop!" he shrieked as her closed his eyes tight, wanting no part in it.
She clicked her tongue against the roof of her mouth, "I wouldn't do that if I were you..." she spoke flirtaciously as she snapped her fingers again and it was silence. Rasiel tried his best to resist the temptation to look, but reluctantly opened his eyes. To his horror, Deskri was bound enveloped by a horned shadow with red eyes, the shadow had a hand up around deskri's neck choking him hard, and his other hand drifted down below his clothes. "DESKRI!" he shouted, struggling to break free from the girl's grasp. She let out a hardy laugh, "There we go! There's the Rasiel I know!" her grimace was ear-to-ear by now.
He let out a wail as he tried to desperately break free of her grasp. "Tell me what you'll do to make me spare him."
"Please let him go... I'll do anything."
"You'll be my slave? My pet, Forever."
"I'll do it,.. for him. Leave him alone..."
"Excellent... Now a matter of making you more human." her eyes narrowed as she titled her head to the side, her yellow eyes cold and calculating as she still kept the appearance of his sister.
"Obscurite I-.." he was cut off mid sentence as she forced the arm she had grasped upward hard, a loud crack rung out in the dark empty building as Rasiel choked upon his sudden inhale. The reaction was delayed as his body tried to comprehend what happened. A terrible pain surged up into his shoulder as he let out a forceful shriek that continued for minutes, his body bucking as he tried to get her off.
A smirk started in on her face quickly widening yet again, "Oh no we're not done yet. That was only so you wouldn't stop me from what I'm going to do next." she explained as she placed a knee into his back between his shoulder blade, taking one hand to grasp one of his wings tightly. Her other hand removed a small dull knife from her pocket. "I really want you to give it your all this time. No holding back, I want you to beg for mercy." she was almost shaking from the excitement within her.
"D-don't! Obscurite!!!" he screamed out. He then felt a rush of agony wave over him, his shoulders hot with distress as she slowly sawed away at the most prominent feature of being non-human. His voice let out wail after wail, screaming until way after his voice could give out. Tears overwhelming his eyes as the blurry image of Deskri before him returned to his view, still tormented by the shadow that wrapped around him though the illusion of Deskri seemed to more than enjoy it. "...please... l-look away.." he managed to mutter through his torn raspy voice. "..m-mercy... i can't... i can't take it... mercy.." he pleaded quietly, sobbing with his face still against the ground as he felt his own warm blood pooling up around him.
She tossed aside the excess as she pulled a hand up to her lips, tasting the fresh blood of her new found pet. Her eyes darted down to Rasiel and followed his gaze to Deskri. She leaned to Rasiel's ear as she whispered "...I lied... there is no mercy here." she grinned wildly then snapped her fingers as the shadow smirked and drew a sharp claw across Deskri's neck hard. Deskri's eyes widened as he dropped to the floor next to Rasiel, grasping at his throat.
"NO! DESKRI!" he shouted, struggling once again. "I love it when you struggle!" she exclaimed as her eyes honed in on his last remaining wing. "You are mine now." she commanded, grasping onto the wing and pulling hard, threatening to pull it straight from his body. Rasiel cried out again even louder, pleading for her to stop as she merely cackled louder at ever scream he uttered. Then it fell silent. She leaned over to look at Rasiel, a disgruntled look on her face as she realized he had passed out from shock. "You'll make up for this later." she growled as she grabbed her knife and rid him of the other wing, tossing that aside. She stood, the illusion of Deskri looking up at her in fear. She looked pretty pissed by this point as she lifted her foot to place it on top of Deskri's skull, pushing down gradually unto the illusion gave way and shatttered. She left Rasiel laying on the floor, she'd have plenty of time to play with her new toy once he woke up again, then she'd really make him pay for falling asleep on her fun.
Posted: Sat Jan 23, 2016 5:07 pm
In Years Passed : Year 5
((TRIGGER WARNING: PHYSICAL ASSAULT, ABUSE))
Rasiel stared blankly across the room as he blinked slowly, setting his stern but lifeless eyes upon a girl. Who was this? Did he know this person? He couldn't remember as he black haired girl cried out desperately to be let go. The girl called his name, screamed it frantically, as though trying to entice something in him to snap out of his daze. Obscurite sat to the side, leaned back and legs crossed her face twisted in annoyance as her narrowed calculating eyes watched the scene unfold. She twitched her foot in agitation.
"Rasiel." Obscurite spoke at softly, like short command to proceed. Rasiel came to a stand, walking over to the girl who struggled through her binds. Her calling out became more frequent, more panicked as his approach seemed to make her extremely concerned for her situation. She begged to be spared, to be let go. Rasiel just stared at her with glassy eyes, unaffected by the girls wails as he grabbed her by the hair to pull her forward and using his other hand to then strike her down to the floor. Tears were overcoming her by now as she could nothing to stop his assault. Obscurite allowed this to continue to a particular extent that was well past what was necessary to determine she was tired of this. Her yellow eyes began to glow as then the girl's did as well for a moment.
The girl cried softly, looking up at the larger red-haired meta as she whispered, "...why did you kill me..." Rasiel stopped for a moment, blinking again slowly as he stared at the girl. She looked so familiar, but he couldn't get the memory to surface.
Obscurite began to smirk, "Rasiel." this time, less of a command.
After the small pause, he continued to strike her hard, fist tensing to harden his blows, seeming apathetic about the whole thing. The smile faded from Obscurite's face as she closed her eyes and sighed, finally done in all her discontent. She stood, intending to leave, "Enough." she commanded as Rasiel immediately stopped what he was doing, staring down at the girl he had been brutally abusing for the past few moments. He turned his attention from her, moving toward Obscurite almost instinctively, placing a hand on her cheek softly as he leaned in to kiss her.
Obscurite swatted his hand away. Any other time she would have gladly accepted a night with her play thing, but she was already in a sour mood. "It's no fun to play with broken toys." she commented scournfully. "You've given up entirely, haven't you? Do you even feel emotions anymore?" she quirked her head to the side, her slender eyes analyzing his face. "It doesn't even matter what I show you.... you just don't get angry any more." her eyes had softened, as though talking to an inanimate object from her favorite collection of toys.
Rasiel grabbed her shoulder forcefully and pulled her closer, intending to take a kiss by force, something it seemed Obscurite had liked quite frequently, being rough with her. She growled as she smacked his hand away even harder this time, "Are you even listening?!" her eyes burning with anger as she stared him down intensely. Rasiel merely stood there, his eyes void of any emotions as he stared toward the ground.
It came to her then, after a moment of thought, a grin began to form on her face. She had an idea as she pushed herself against Rasiel, locking lips with him passionately. His eyes widened a bit in surprise but then returned to their normal dead pan look. Obscurite's eyes glinted with a devious plan. She pushed hard, knocking Rasiel to the ground as she laid on top of him, pinning his arms down. She pulled back from the kiss. "I want to give you a gift. Something, to always remember me by." she spoke softly, her voice flirtatious and her eyes fixed on his passionately. She leaned down just before kissing him, opening her mouth just wide enough that some kind of bright orange aura began to pour from her mouth, forcing itself into Rasiel's, his eyes widening yet again. Her body was beginning to heat up from the use of her energy like this, it tired her out quite a bit.
Once finished, she drew back, removing herself from on top of his to come to a stand. She eyed him carefully to see if it worked as her body teetered lightly and leaned against the wall for stability. It took more energy than she intended to but she hoped it was worth it.
Rasiel sat up and looked at the other girl, bruised and bleeding, crying. His body began to shake as the memory of the person forced itself into the foreground. "...a-alice?.." he choked out, frozen in fear. He began to clench his teeth, his eyes becoming hot with anger and his breathing quickened suddenly. Obscurite began to grimace, her plan seemed to be working. Rasiel let out a scream of anguish as he punched the ground, anger seeming to overtake him, his actions becoming more instinctual.
"Kill her."
Rasiel, without hesitating, lashed his arm forward, grabbing hold of the girl's neck and slamming her back down to the floor hard. The girl couldn't breathe, the wind knocked from her lungs, her eyes wide in fear. His eyes narrowed sternly as he summoned his blood sword and impaled her in the chest. A whimpered gasp escaped her lips, a whisper of his name, and then nothing.
Rasiel came to a stand, turning to face Obscurite, walking towards her. Her eyes excited for what she was seeing, what was to come. He grabbed hold of her neck, slamming her back up against the wall. Obscurite winced slightly but grimaced as she seemed to more than enjoy it. She stared him down, watching his actions, looking into his eyes as they slowly became cold and lifeless once more. More calculating as he tilted her head forcefully and bit her neck. She hadn't the energy to exactly fight him off in this state, so she decided to go along with it. Usually she was the first to initiate such contact with Rasiel, eager to take advantage of the man he'd grown into for her own personal gain. She had remembered how he would fight against her often, reluctant to give in even though his body would still react to her. It was some time before he had become used to her forcefulness then he began to start it, this being one of those times.
A soft moan escaped her lips as his hands travelled over her body. She glanced to his eyes, he had given up again, given into being the husk of a broken man, moving on instinct alone, out of habit of what always happened. Obscurite smiled, 'One step at a time.'
Rasiel laid on the floor, barely breathing, barely existing as a bit of light had begun to hit his face. That's weird, it was mostly dark in the house and this was the first time he could finally tell if it were day or night. His eyes slid slowly over to a window, the curtain had been peeked through by someone and not replaced all the way as the sunshine began to peer back into the home in a sliver. Rasiel mustered the strength to stand, his back lighting up in pain as the lacerations shifted and some reopened. He had tried to fight back from Obscurite, tried to resist her. She didn't find it so amusing this time around as she really let into his back with a hot knife, halfway through deciding to cool the knife down for better effect.
He pulled a nearby blanket up around his body, and slid carefully over the the window. What was the world like now? How long had it been? Did people even recognize him here? Where was here? The questions raced through his mind as he finally had the courage to peek out. The brightness of the day causing him to squint in pain as his eyes slowly adjusted to the scenery.They were in a city, not one he thought he recognized as the bustle of the townsfolk was silenced by the thick pane of glass separating him from them. He wanted to look away, but the desire to know more, to see more burned within him. Would he take that chance? Could he take that chance?
Rasiel had noticed that Obscurite didn't even seem to be around at the moment. He didn't know where she had gone, but he didn't want to stick around to find out. It had been years since he had latched onto the succubus hoping for shelter and safety from humans and metas at any cost. His eyes narrowed with stern determination as he pulled the blanket up over his face into a hood and bolted out the door. This is it, he was going to finally do something for himself for once.
He shut off his mind as his legs took over, he ran as fast and as far as he could manage in his condition. Until he almost reached the outskirts of town. His legs were ready to give out as he came to a stop, breathing hard as he looked around. He swallowed hard, his throat dry and exhausted as he tried to take another step forward and stumbled slightly. Maybe he could force himself to run until he truly collapsed completely. His mind was empty save for the only thought of regret for what he was doing. He knew that Obscurite would definitely give a beating he wouldn't soon forget if she found out he had left.
Suddenly he heard footsteps, no, running. A lot of people running. Rasiel panicked and hid inside a nearby abandoned building. He hugged the wall as he waited for the footsteps to pass. But one set did not, someone bolted through the doorway Rasiel had just entered and came to a stop, falling to their knees in exhaustion. Their top half was covered by a shawl it seemed as Rasiel was confused, intrigued, and terrified all at the same time. Rasiel wanted to leave, he wanted to go back now. His foot moved and the noise it made alerted the other person to his presence as they jolted to their feet in surprise. Rasiel stepped back in fear as he tripped over something and stumbled slightly, letting go of the blanket. His eyes went wide with terror as he was sure this human would surely kill him.
"Are you part of the renegade?" the unknown person spoke out to him, a male's voice.
The renegade? "..i'm rasiel..." he blurted out hapharzardly, immediately regretting the decision to say anything at all, let alone his own tarnished name.
The man laughed from beneath his cover, then stepped forward and Rasiel tried to take a step back but had no more room to do so. There was some noise outside, however, and the man looked over to the doorway then back to Rasiel, grabbing his hand suddenly. "We need to go now." he instructed as he took off running again, Rasiel didn't have it in him to deny the command and simply followed him.
It was some time before they reached what seemed like a safe house, or maybe the man's home. Rasiel was tired, he had expended so much energy already.
"So,... you're Rasiel the Killer?" the man inquired, though he didn't exactly seem mad about it.
Rasiel tensed up. Is that what they were calling him now? Did this person drag him all the way just to end his pitiful existence? He nodded very slowly, eyes averted to the floor. He accepted whatever would happen. If this was the end, then maybe he could finally rest. He was tired of fighting off his inevitable downfall.
"You know... a lot of people are looking for you..."
Rasiel slowly nodded again.
"Well, you won't be safe in this city. I'm about to move to a city that's a little more secluded. Maybe you should come along."
Rasiel shifted his eyes to the covered man, confused and concerned as he didn't understand why this person even cared for his well being. "...why."
"Because you don't look like the type of person to kill in cold blood." the guy moved his hands to grip the covering and pull it off. "You look like you've been running from a lie your whole life... and I know how that feels. I want to help."
Rasiel could not wrap his head around why this human wanted to help him, to essentially spare his life, to allow him to continue existing. As the man pulled off the cover, Rasiel's eyes widened, his hair was a beautiful soft pink, and his eyes a confident ocean of blue. He smiled, "I guess I also have something to hide. My name is Zaku."
"...zaku..."
"Please rest for now, you're safe here. In the morning, we can go to the new city together and start our lives over. You don't have to stick with me after that, just want to get you out of here. It's pretty dangerous."
Rasiel felt comforted by Zaku's efforts to make him feel safe. Zaku helped him over to a spare bed and smiled lightly at him. "...thank you..." he whispered as sleep began to threaten him for control.
"Don't worry. I won't let anything hurt you. Not while I'm around." he assured, his face soft and determined.
You don't deserve this. You'll be dead by morning.
"..then just let me die... everything i loved is gone... i'm done fighting you...."
Posted: Sat Jan 23, 2016 5:10 pm
In Years Passed: Year 12
It had been two years since he last saw Obscurite. It was almost like she had vanished without a trace and that fact both relieved and terrified him. It had taken so much time to get back to normal. Well, as normal as he could manage. The first few weeks were hard as the reality of all the things Rasiel had been forced to do haunted his dreams, and even echoed in his wakeful hours. He had stopped eating, stopped sleeping. And at some points, stopped responding. But Zaku stayed by his side, quietly waiting for Rasiel to pull himself up far enough to listen to Zaku's encouraging words. Rasiel had felt so unworthy of Zaku, as he never judged him for his past. Something he longed for.
Zaku had been apart of the renegade effort to fight back against the injustice of the humans and to, further more, protect all of metakind. Rasiel found that noble, despite the hardships that Zaku faced, he remained optimistic and confident. He envied him. It was something he wanted for himself, but never felt strong enough to obtain.
Rasiel had slowly begun to be his old self again, even finding the strength to snark back every now and again, always be met with a heartfelt laugh from Zaku. The blue-eyed meta always had it rough after spring when his hair would fade to blonde and his powers would diminish, but again, he never let that stop him for sticking up for those who needed it. Those like Rasiel. It wasn't long before it came to surface that Zaku was close friends with three other familiar renegade metas. Andy, Kira, and Lucian. Rasiel was hesitant to take Zaku's requests to join the renegade. He felt his name would tarnish their efforts, to conspire with Rasiel the Killer. Zaku didn't feel the same way, but never pressured him about it. However, he suggested he at least talked to Kira as she was really receptive to the idea of talking to Rasiel even if she had no idea that he was still around.
Kira and Rasiel ended up becoming good friends behind the backs of Andy and Lucian. She was happy to see he was okay, and after much explanation, she believed every word of his wholeheartedly. They talked about so much and kept in contact often. Kira, however, warned Rasiel never to talk to Lucian, at least for now. Lucian had still been very scournful about the day his mother died as she wasn't sure if Lucian could ever forgive him. Kira also asked him to join the renegade. Rasiel was reluctant because of his association to the events of the past, but Kira was confident that he could somehow prove to everyone he wasn't bad. She even suggested he don a mask and call himself by a different name. Jokingly they came up with Rhun, because it meant that he was going to do great things. He denied at that time, finding it unnecessary. He was content with hiding with Zaku and living a normal life away from strife as best he could. She accepted his decision and they didn't talk about it again.
It wasn't long before the topic of something more came up. Zaku asked him if he ever considered marriage. Rasiel was honest, he had a long time ago, but then life took him in a different direction and he lost that person in the fray. He wasn't lying, though a vague truth of the matter. Rasiel felt self-conscious explaining that his love had caused the reason why they fought against the humans, the reason the school closed down, the very reason renegade even came into existence. Zaku didn't seem to care, he had decided to spend his life with Rasiel, and he wanted Rasiel to know that. Though terrified and reluctant, Rasiel finally agreed and they became something more.
-------------------------------------------------
In Years Passed: Year 13
Rasiel and Zaku had been married a year when the topic of children came up. Rasiel had never been one to initiate such thoughts, but here it was, and honestly, he wasn't entirely against it. There was just one burning question in his mind. "What if they look like a Meta?... What if they... look like me?"
"I hope they do. I love looking at your face." he kissed Rasiel's marking lightly.
"You're the only one..." he sighed, "It's not safe for Metas."
"I know, but that should not deny us our right to happiness. I.. I just wish there was a safe place for us to go. For all of us."
"There was once... then I screwed it up for everyone."
Zaku shook his head with a smile, "You have to stop blaming yourself for what was clearly an accident. If anyone's to blame, it's the humans. Your sister's death was not your fault."
Rasiel sighed again, he thought about it in silence for a while, before giving up on reasoning and delved straight into impulse. "We'd have to find an alter..."
"Don't worry about that." he smiled softly, "Kira and Andy found one not too far from here. We can leave right now and be back in a couple days.
Rasiel smiled, genuinely smiled as all his fears and regrets melted away within the eyes of Zaku, someone he had truly grown to love over the years.
They set off to the alter that night, bringing all the necessary materials as they created life upon one of the few golden alters left in their world. On their way back, Zaku held the pink and black swirled egg in his arms as they walked into the outskirts of town. Rasiel told him that he finally had the confidence to join the renegade and that he'd obscure his face and call himself Rhun. Then nobody would associate him with the renegade. Zaku liked the plan, seeing that Rasiel finally had something to fight for, a reason to live. They decided on names for their children. They stuck to two, and would come up with more if there happen to be more than that. Melody and Zane.
On the way back to their home, a few humans noticed the egg they were hiding and decided to make a scene of it, moving in as though to threaten to smash it. Rasiel grinned as the humans noticed who he was. Rasiel the Killer. They immediately called for his head, the bounty way too high to overlook. Rasiel gave a nod to Zaku and they both split up in different directions. It was understood that Zaku head to their home for safety and Rasiel would loose their pursuers before returning home himself.
After some time of runnning, Rasiel finally bolted through the door of their home, locking it behind him as he fell against the door out of breath. "Hey, guess who's home?" he called out. Silence. He seemed confused, Zaku should have been back by now. There's no way that they would have any trouble getting home as he had practically half the town running after him before escaping out of sight. He stepped into the front room as his eyes went wide in horror. The place was a mess, a struggle clearly took place her. "ZAKU!!" he screeched in panic as he ran through the house in search of him. He came to the bedroom, busting it open forcefully as his whole body froze up. He stumbled back lightly, unable to control his body from shaking. "... no.. ZAKU!!!" he screamed out as he shoved himself forward toward the figure on the floor, covered in his own blood, lacerations and abrasions covering his body. Rasiel pulled him closely, not even caring about what blood got on him. "Zaku!" he continued to cry out in anguish, as the Meta opened his eyes weakly. He heard his name softly as he inhaled sharply and looked down at him, met with Zaku's usual smile though weak and fading fast.
Rasiel's eyes overcame with tears as he held him. "WHAT HAPPENED!!" he shrieked again, trying to understand who could do this. Zaku was unresponsive, just smiling. Rasiel darted his eyes around the room for clues, his blurry tear-filled eyes setting sight on writing upon the wall in blood. Zaku's blood. Rasiel was filled with anger, remorse, fear and agony as he knew exactly who did this.
I F O U N D Y O U
Returning to look at Zaku, he shook him lightly, panic setting deep with his soul. "WHERE'S THE EGG! ZAKU! DID SHE TAKE IT!?" Zaku calmly closed his eyes, still smiling as he weakly lift him hand to point to a cupboard across the room. Rasiel looked over to the cupboard, untouched in the chaos. Then he felt Zaku's hand drop. His heart sank as he tensed up, shaking Zaku. He inhaled slowly and let out a loud curdling scream as he buried his face into Zaku's chest. The cry lasted for minutes, as his voice was giving out from the sheer force of his pain.
After a few moments, he willed himself to stand, forcing himself to open the cupboard, inside, a messy pile of blankets lay in the bottom, the egg nestled safely. Rasiel picked up the egg, inspecting it, tears unable to stop as he held it carefully in his hands. Turning it, he noticed a large crack down the mostly-black side. The egg was still unhatched but damaged. He pulled the egg close and cried.
It wasn't until later, when Kira arrived that she was able to get Zaku to a human hospital to stablize his condition. Kira had given Rasiel a mask to wear so he could hide himself from the others, as Andy and Lucian came. Zaku had fallen into a deep coma and it was likely he would never wake again. When asked if they should keep Zaku on life support or not, Rasiel could not answer, he could not bear the thought of actually losing Zaku and decided to hold out for hope.
"If I can just find us a protected place to live, maybe when you wake up... We can finally be safe."
Rhun had been walking aimlessly through the grounds, a solemn look on his face. He reminisced about the experiences he had when he was growing up. The park where he met Deskri, the nurses office where he first confessed his feelings for him, the dorm room that he shared with Deskri, the lake where Kagyaku and Obscurite made a deal, the field where his sister was married, the mansion that he grew up in with his mother.
The memories pained him, as he found his way to the entrance of the hedge maze. So many things he wanted to remember, so many more that he wished he could forget. He picked a few flowers and made his way to the adult housing section of the grounds.
Delilah was outside sweeping the porch of the home she had lived in within the grounds. The small front yard was overgrown with dead plants that she didn't care to make better, there was no use. She set eyes on the man, and then narrowed them at him scornfully. She closed her eyes then turned to walk away.
"Delilah, wait."
"W-what c-could you possibly w-want?" she retorted quickly.
The response pained him as he forced himself to approach. "Lily.. please listen to me... I want to apologize." he looked hurt as his eyes pleaded an audience with her. He held out the flowers to her, hoping she would accept his small gift of an apology.
Delilah glared at him and grabbed the flowers, letting them wilt in her hands then threw them on the ground harshly. "D-do you e-even think? Or d-do you just d-do whatever is c-convenient for you?" she asked, her green eyes burned deep as she still wasn't over her previous conversation with him.
Rhun simply said nothing as he turned to leave, he figured he'd give her space. Just give everyone space.
Delilah sighed, letting go over her anger temporarily. At least one of them could control how they expressed their emotions. "R-rasiel... I n-need to show y-you something..." she offered calming, propping the broom against the wall of her house and made her way down the step to Rhun.
Rhun nodded slowly as he began to follow Delilah, the whole time they were quiet as they walked. The two of them seemed to walk to a pretty secluded part of the grounds, a cliffside that overlooked the ocean behind the campus. As they moved closer to the edge, something began to come into view. A headstone. Rhun's heart sank hard as he couldn't force himself to stop moving towards it. Coming up to it, his eyes filled with tears.
Alice Broken July 20 XXXX - December 1 XXXX
His body halted movement right in front of the grave of his own sister. He was in devestation over his feelings being right there staring him in the face. He turned to look at Delilah with heartache piercing his eyes easily. Even the mask could hide those feelings.
Delilah began to speak slowly, ".... y-you cannot t-tell me t-that I don't u-understand... I k-knew Alice t-too..." the glint of resentment beginning to surface in her eyes. This place was dear to her, and she wanted Rasiel to see that.
Rhun dropped to his knees and screamed out, punching the grass beneath him. "Alice!!" he cried out, removing his mask angrily to toss it aside. He wanted to feel this. He wanted Rasiel to feel these emotions.
Delilah tensed as Rasiel began to lose control of his anger. She was angry that he could be so reckless like this. "...y-you could have s-stayed..."
"I... I couldn't..."
"Y-YOU COULD H-HAVE STAYED..."
"...they would have hurt you... they would have hurt all of you..."
"WHO CARES!" she clenched her eyes shut tightly, tears beginning to well up and the ground around her began to turn black.
"Delilah, I was trying to protect you."
"BY LEAVING HER ALONE FOR 20 YEARS? BY LEAVING ME ALONE?!" the air was getting thick around them as the grass around her died and turned black, its radius increasing.
"...delilah..."
She covered her face as she sobbed uncontrollably. "A-and... you just come b-back... like nothing is w-wrong... So EXCUSE ME F-FOR BEING U-UPSET!"
Rasiel remained silent, she was right, he had been a shitty person to her. To Deskri. To Alice.
"....i... i o-owe you a l-lot.... b-but I'll b-be honest Genba...." she lowered her hands, to look at him with stern eyes, distress on her face. "...I w-want n-nothing to d-do with you.... S-so I'm sorry... i-if I don't want to t-talk to you...... N-not until you p-prove your not j-just going to l-leave again... "
Rasiel shook his head slowly, his eyes locked on Alice's grave. He went to open his mouth to speak but she cut him off immediately.
"...d-don't make p-promises.... s-show us...." she demanded.
Rasiel couldn't feel more horrible at this very moment. He sat there on his knees, staring at the tombstone. "...alice,... i'm so sorry..."
Delilah shifted her eyes away, still unable to control her tears though the black aura about her had ceased to increase. "A-are you... even going to t-tell Melody?"
"...i can't... she's the daughter of Rasiel... it's better if she never finds out."
"...I d-don't approve of i-it, Rasiel.... She d-deserves to know... she d-deserves a f-father..." she turned her head away.
Even if we didn't.
Rasiel sighed.
"T-think about it... h-how hurt is s-she going to b-be... w-when she finds out... her f-father was right n-next to her... b-but still r-refused to love h-her... "
Rasiel buried his face in his hands, he was truly at a loss for words.
"...s-stop r-running, Rasiel...." she turned to leave, pausing, she always had to have the last word. "...w-when are y-you going to s-stop hurting p-people in your w-wake... w-when are you g-going to t-take responsibility for y-your selfish a-actions?" She closed her eyes, taking a deep breath as the black aura died down and dissipated. "g-grow up, rasiel. I-i'm tired of l-looking at the m-monster that k-keeps calling h-himself m-my friend."
Posted: Thu Jan 28, 2016 8:40 pm
Unusual Circumstances
Rhun was filling out some paperwork, he seemed concerned about the information he was documenting, but it seemed necessary. He ran a gloved hand to keep his black hair slicked back so it didn't fall into his face as he worked. It had definitely been a busy day to say the least. Delilah was still not back from wherever she had gone to. Much longer, and he'd have to call her. There was just too much for him to do on his own at the moment. He needed a break as he leaned back in the chair and took a deep breath. It at least made him feel better.
There was a black van pulling up to the sanctuary. It had circled around twice already, but this time it finally stopped in front of the main gate. The sputtering engine masked the hushed tones of two men as the passenger left the vehicle. With his oversized shades and red hoodie pulled up, he looked around frantically, keeping his head low. The side door slid open and a hand waved him over. Quickly, he reached in with both arms and pulled out a small figure wrapped in a torn blanket. The figure was placed against the gate and the man in the hoodie retreated. After a few seconds of more deliberating, a loud honk emitted from the van, prolonged for nearly a minute before it reared back and drove off, tires screeching.
It had been especially quiet despite the commotion that had played out in the main building earlier that day. Rhun had been especially attentive to listen for Delilah's return when he heard the car horn ring out from the distance that he heard with crystal clear clarity. He bolted from the chair in surprise then placed a hand on his chest as if to calm his fast beating heart. "What in the world.." he seemed confused as he didn't care to even lock away his papers, making his way outside immediately. Something was very odd about what was happening and he was determined to find out. As he began to approach the gate, he noticed a small figure wrapped in a blanket was propped hastily against the gate. He quickened his pace as he reached them with urgency. Rhun practically ripped the glove from his hand as he reached to place two fingers against her neck. A pulse. That was a good sign. He darted his head around looking around for who did this. He seemed fearful but resolute. Placing a hand on their shoulder, he shook them very carefully. "Hey.. are you okay?" he asked, using his other hand to lift their head to see the face of what seemed like a female child. He felt enraged that someone could leave this small girl out here by herself, jumping to conclusions that she may have been attacked in his mind.
The small child was starting to open her eyes, her small hand reaching out. She had so many questions, but didn't know how to express everything in thought. Her head was still spinning from her encounter on stage. Her mouth began to move, repeating the last word she heard with perfect mimicry. "... Okay?"
Rhun was confused but understood that she was mimicking his voice. A sound Meta no doubt. He was familiar with that, very familiar. He picked her up into his arms and began to carry her back to the main building. He had so many questions, but most of them would have to wait for a bit later when she had her bearings. "What's your name?" he asked, keeping an eye on her as he walked. He smiled down at her, comforting her. He figured the more relaxed he was, the less stressing the situation would be on the child.
There was no struggle. All she knew was that this was the first person to hold her since her parents had. It was a familiar feeling, safe. "Zahara," she replied. Her hands began to clutch tightly on Rhun. Just feeling the comfort of someone else was enough to bring back so much that she had gone through. She didn't understand any of it. She didn't even realize she was crying until she felt her cheek wet against Rhun. She didn't sob or shout, she just quietly let the tears soak into her his clothes.
Rhun had been sitting nearby Alice's grave, just before the edge of the cliffside. Just taking in the salty taste in the air as the wind blew threw his hair, breaking it up from it's slicked back position to messily dance among the breeze. It was dark, just as it always when he came here to think about things. He pondered so many things, his head filled with thoughts and possibilities. His relationships with others, his need to hide from the world, his want to stop Obscurite from poisoning his mind further. Was it even possible to be a whole person again? Or was he just too far down the path of becoming a monster to be saved? He thought about those he once knew that would inevitably show up again. This place was their home. Sighing, he placed his masked face into one hand, leaning back on his other hand. This was a mess. The voice in his mind begged to interject, but the loud crashing waves below the cliff drowned out anything she had to say. The noise was deafening, which was why he hadn't heard someone approach from behind. Luckily he was still pretty disguised that it wouldn't matter too much.
Andy had a feeling she'd find him here. He had been avoiding her for days apparently, which would normally make her angry, but this time she just watched silently, trying her best to understand with a sorrowful look on her face. It didn't seem like he'd noticed her any time soon, so she took her own initiative to approach him, walking up to sit beside him, setting a gift-wrapped box beside herself. "Why did I have a feeling I'd find you here?" she spoke softly, but loud enough to be heard over the waves.
Rhun tensed up as suddenly someone was sitting beside him, releasing his hand from his face. He looked fairly surprised but quickly masked it with a charming smile, but his eyebrows upturned, showing his nervousness. "A-Andy.... I'm sorry. I shouldn't have-... I didn't want-.." he simply couldn't find the words to say what he meant. He wanted to apologize for standing her up days ago, and then avoiding her since.
Andy held up a hand and shook her head to stop him, "You don't need to apologize." she then began to smirk and leaned a little closer. "You know, you could always make it up to me..."Leaning in even more, she was obviously intending to kiss him.
Rhun leaned away. "Andy, I'm sorry. I-... I didn't mean to lead you on. I don't want to have sex with you. Or anything really. I just..." he hesitated. He couldn't just tell her the truth that he had been trying to protect Deskri from her. She would surely catch on at this rate. "Look, you're a nice girl, and I know we spent a lot of time together in the renegade... But my heart belongs to someone else."
At least you think it does.
Rhun felt a stab in his heart at the truth of the comment that rang out louder than the waves below. "I'm truly very sorry... I've never had feelings for you like that."
Andy paused, her eyes inspecting him a bit before closing her eyes and smiling with a snort. "I just had to know for sure..." She sat back up straight and sighed. She knew he didn't actually intend to be with her. He never did, though she knew there had been a time where he had just wanted her to be happy because he couldn't. "Someone else?... I think I know who... It's Deskri, isn't it..." she opened her eyes and looked up at the stars smiling. She laughed aloud, covering up her own insecurities, her own need to just cry out over finally knowing the truth. "I'm not even mad about it, you know.." she whispered suddenly as she shook her head.
Rhun was taken back by her guess on who he had referenced. He tried his best not to show his surprise, he didn't want to give it away. "Why would you say something like that?" he inquired, watching her face closely with his piercing red eyes. Was it a stab in the dark? Was it obvious who he was protecting? He turned himself toward her, giving her his full attention. "I don't know what you're getting at, but I don't think you understand."
Andy snorted, her smile growing, though her eyes were pained. "Lucky guess, I suppose..." she muttered. She focused out on the sky, trying not to focus on her own pain, but then he turned to her and she seemed confused and surprised. "Like I said, I'm not even mad about it.. It's okay." she reached over and pulled forth the gift, handing it to him. It was a decent size, but small enough to not be considered bulky. "Maybe you should open this. I think it will make more sense if you see it." she then leaned slightly closer. "Then maybe... you can give me something in return."
Rhun didn't understand what Andy was playing at, it was hard to tell. He looked down at the gift quizzically, then back to her. "Look, I'm not into your weird sex toys. And I already told you I'm not interested. That usually works, why are you still persisting with this..."
Andy sighed, "Just open it."
Rhun pulled off the cover and became more confused, it looked like hair and a piece of paper. Pulling both items out of the box, it was a raspberry colored wig and the folded up paper seemed to have writing on it. He looked to Andy then back to the items. Placing the wig back down, he opened the letter. Reading it, his eyes widened slowly. After a moment, he suddenly looked up to Andy. "Y-you..."
She was already reaching out to his mask as she nodded slowly. Rhun hesitated but didn't stop her as she unlatched the mask and removed it from his face, revealing his true identity. "Yeah... I knew."
Rasiel's breath quickened and his chest tightened. She not only knew who he was since she got here, but she seemed to know he had never truly loved her. "I... I'm sorry.."
"Don't. It's.. it was complicated. But I'm happy that you tried." she averted her eyes for a moment. "I'm guessing you two are back together again?.."
"I.. I don't... I guess.." he lowered his head and sighed. He wanted to say yes. But he was already starting to come to terms that this was only temporary. They were only together because he had begged Deskri in a moment of weakness. It was doomed to fail. And to make matters worse, Deskri hadn't even been around when he went to check on him the last few times. Either he had been hiding in the shadows or he left some time ago and would probably never come back. Who knew.
Andy quirked an eyebrow. "Why are you so unsure? You love him, don't you?"
Rasiel hesitated. "I don't know.."
"You just told me your heart belonged to someone else. Then who is it, then?" she was starting to get angry.
Anyone but you..
Rasiel grasped his head. "I-.... I don't know..... I don't know." he closed his eyes tightly.
"Whoa.. okay okay, calm down. I'm sorry." she frowned and placed a hand on his shoulder. "At least you eventually were honest about your feelings for me. Or lack thereof, anyway. I think you really need to consider how you really feel about Deskri. And ask yourself who is it your heart actually belongs to. Because it seems like it belongs to someone. But here you haven't even mentioned Zaku. And you are obviously unsure of Deskri. So I wonder who it is then." she smiled softly. "Look, I'm here for you, Rasiel. I always have been. If you need help with anything, let me know?"
Rasiel nodded slowly then looked to Andy. "Zaku... woke up."
"Really?? What about.. the egg? What happen to your children?"
"Child. It's only Melody. She's here, but she has no idea who I really am. Zaku... he doesn't remember anything. I don't know what to do."
Andy nodded, taking in the information. Formulating a plan. She wanted to offer to raise Melody, but she was a terrible mother and would admit that outright. She also didn't want Rasiel to be obligated to stay with her again. She had already figured Rasiel didn't want Melody finding out about him since everyone thought he was some kind of murderer. "Why don't... I talk to Zaku. He probably won't remember me, but I don't see why Zaku wouldn't hear me out. He's the kind of person who would want to know that he had a daughter even if he didn't remember her. I'll explain the situation about you. And that's that."
"I'll talk to him. He'd want to hear it directly from me."
Andy nodded in agreement. He was right. Well, it was settled. She handed him back his mask and then stood up, dusting her skirt off. "Well... I'll be around if you need me. That wig in there is so you can look like your old self again... That way no one catches on. The more differences, the better, right?" she turned to leave then stopped. "I never thought you did anything wrong. Those humans are the ones that should be hunted, not you. I will do anything I can to help redeem your name again. I swear it." she then looked down at him and smiled, "Stop being impulsive some time, okay? You really made yourself look like an a** in front of everyone." she laughed a bit, trying to cheer him up the only way she knew how. "Well.. see you around." Andy gave a small wave and walked away, leaving Rasiel to reflect on himself for the while.
Quote:
Kira's Letter to Andy
Dearest Sister,
It has been a year since you left for your mission, the one that could only be entrusted to you. I took on quite a similar mission, one a lot closer to home so that I may be home to Leukos all that much sooner. He's growing so fast, you'd be proud. Zaku's condition is still stable but unchanged.
But this is not why I am writing to you. And why you will not receive this right away. Let us pray you never receive this letter. Because if you have, it means that I have failed my mission and I am dead.
Please do not cry for me. It is unfortunate, but we all knew the risks of becoming the renegade we are today. We fight with our lives, each and every day.
My beloved sister, I have kept a very big secret from you, to my regret. I feel you should know, and that you would understand the circumstances of the information I am about to tell you. The husband that Zaku kept from us, the one he refused to speak of is our own Rasiel. He is the other parent to the egg. Rasiel and I talked often, and he was afraid of what you and Lucian would think of him. With our persuasion, he became Rhun and joined us.
I know this may be hard to believe. Please understand, as your trusted sister, when I say that Rasiel is not a killer. I believe he never had intentions to hurt Alice. It was truly an accident, one he still blames himself for. He took their egg to a facility shortly after you left. He intends to reopen the academy as a sanctuary for metakind. Everything we dreamed of.
Please find him; help him. He needs us to help protect his identity so that he can build this foundation for our children. I trust this personal mission to you, Andy. Please keep him safe. And keep an eye on Lucian, he tries so hard to be strong. He really does.
I love you, Andy. I'm sorry that I couldn't tell you all this in person. Please forgive me.
Sincerely, Kira Elliot Eternal
Posted: Mon Feb 29, 2016 9:43 pm
In Years Passed: Year 14 Rhun joins facility/ Melody is born/ Andy Leave on her mission
In Years Passed: Year 15 Kira dies / Leukos is entrusted to him / Lucian leaves to go look for Andy
In Years Passed: Year 17 Something about Melody and Rhun
Posted: Sun Mar 06, 2016 8:31 pm
[Selfish]
------ A page seems to be loose, if you tug it enough, it comes out of the journal easily ---------
When I was a child, I wanted to think that the problem was Obscurite. The malice that took home within myself. That every bad thing that happened was because of him. So many years have passed. I had hoped to look back and see all the accomplishments of my life. Yet, when I looked back on my life, I could only look out over a sea of mistakes. The people I've killed. The love I tried to build but ultimately tore down with my own hands. Everything was hard to take in. All the good I had thought I'd done was only the stepping stones to become the killer I am today. Every woman and child fears my name, my markings, my very presence. And they should.
When I dream, if I dream, I can only hear the chants of every person I've ever hurt. Every person I've ever killed with my bare hands. I hear them begging for me to fall. To be tortured for my sins and my crimes. And they are right. I am nothing but a monster. Even in my attempt to talk to the ones I once loved, they know I've changed. They know they aren't talking to Rasiel anymore. They are talking to the fleeting moment of humanity within a beast lusting to destroy everything it sets eyes on. They hate me, they fear me, they want me to burn. I don't blame them.
I learned to make a new weapon. I thought on it hard and it was easier than I had imagined. My blood pooling and forming into something easier to carry. A gun. Though, when I had intended to protect others with this weapon, my first instinct was to turn it on myself. I don't think I was wrong. I pressed the barrel to my head. I considered it. I really did. To protect them from me. I'm the problem. And once the humans find out I'm here in the sanctuary, they will surely come for me. They'll hurt everyone again. I was going to pull the trigger. They didn't need me. But in the end I was a coward. I'm so pathetic. I couldn't even sacrifice my own life to protect these people. The abomination that grew in the depths of the academy we all lived at. I'm absolutely selfish. I'm sorry. It's all my fault.
One day.. I'll accept my fate... and I'll pull that trigger. I'll save them from myself, before I hurt anyone else I love.
------ A page seems to be loose, if you tug it enough, it comes out of the journal easily ---------
I had locked myself in my sister's old bedroom in the mansion. I lost track of the time, that's very unlike me. I just wanted some time to think. After what Andy said to me. Maybe I was confused. I couldn't even give her a straight answer about how I felt about Deskri. Knowing her, she used the opportunity to place doubt. Though, it wasn't needed. I already doubted. It was a moment of weakness, and it was only a temporary solution. I want it to work. I doubt it will. It's not fair to him. Delilah was appalled, angry that I could "do this to him again". I didn't mean for this to happen. I haven't seen him in a while. Not exactly sure what happened to him, but I guess I'll give him space. After that last time, maybe that was for the best. I plan on going to see someone in the city soon. Hopefully, that won't cause any problems. In and out, really quick. I just need to see him. Maybe Rhun can help me make it there and back unnoticed. I'll have to see. I hate to rely on him like this, the more I involve myself with him, the worse the outcome is going to be. I just need to think. What did Andy mean by who my heart truly belongs to. I hate when she acts like she knows what's going on with me. She has no idea. But maybe she's right. I should talk to them. Maybe I'm rushing things. Maybe my heart was not meant for anyone. I'm barely a person anymore. I haven't a heart anymore, so maybe it belongs to death. I'm just waiting for it to come and claim it. Who the ******** knows?
------ There seems to be a list at the bottom of the page ---------
-Go to the city -Talk to Deskri -Clean Alice's room -Read the book
Posted: Thu Mar 24, 2016 9:58 pm
[Frayed Ends]
------ A page seems to be loose, if you tug it enough, it comes out of the journal easily ---------
I had waited until the sun went down and the coast was clear. Made sure all of Rhun’s obligations were done before he helped me get into the city undetected. I’m really beginning to dislike him, but at this point I am just his slave. Maybe that’s for the best, he’s done more help than I have, so I have no room to judge him. He’s gotten me out of a bind more times than I can remember, and my affiliation with him would only seek to destroy everything he’s built. So I owe him. Besides, Zaku might remember something if he sees Rhun this time. I was able to get into the hospital pretty easily with Rhun’s expert smooth-talking. He’s getting a little too good at that, it’s unsettling.
Zaku remembered seeing me the last time, but nothing more than that. He introduced himself with Rhun. Zaku could already tell that I had something important to say, but I was too much of a coward to tell him. Rhun was better at this, and he took over the conversation. He told Zaku about the renegade and their time together. All the while, I remained silent within my own regret. I thought I could talk to him, but here I was too nervous, too scared to say a word. Rhun explained that Zaku had a daughter that he had taken care of in the 7 years Zaku had been asleep. Zaku was hesitant at first but smiled like he always did. When he asked who was the girl’s other parent was, Rhun told him it was Rasiel the Killer. For whatever reason, he had fell in love with a killer and maybe it was best never to tell anyone, since Rasiel was a wanted man and had left him a long time ago anyway. Zaku agreed. He smiled at me. I still couldn’t muster the courage to tell him it was me. That I was Rasiel, standing before him. That Rhun wouldn’t say it was me.
Then Zaku handed me something. It took me by surprise as I noticed it was a ring. I was going to ask him why he was giving this to me, but he was already there with an answer.
“Because I know this really belong to you... Rasiel.”
I was completely silent, I wanted to cry. Like he understood everything. Just like he always did. It hurt so much, but somehow it was nice. Rhun simply nodded. I asked him what would happen to Melody. Zaku smiled brightly and said he would handle it. He knew I could never be involved in her life like I wanted to. Maybe one day, but I didn’t want her getting hurt in all this. If they finally found me. Rhun said it was getting late and Zaku nodded. Zaku said goodbye to Rhun, and then said goodbye to me, told me to take care of myself. He really meant it too. He always did. The walk home was quiet. Neither of us had anything to say, just an understanding that things were settled. One more thing off of my list of things I needed to take care of.
---------------
-Go to the city -Talk to Deskri -Clean Alice's room -Read the book
------ A page seems to be loose, if you tug it enough, it comes out of the journal easily ---------
Deskri left. I wanted to stop him, but I have no right. I made a mistake. No, a lot of mistakes. Is there nothing I can do to redeem myself for all the people I've hurt. All the people I've killed.
I thought about seeking her out. The only thing holding back from the edge is the entire life I've built here. I can't just turn my back on all that. Maybe I'll just fade away after all... just like before. Just disappear from the existence of this world and fade into the malice that I've become.
I'm not even worth saving.
I'm worthless.
---------------
-Go to the city -Talk to Deskri -Clean Alice's room -Read the book
