Welcome to Gaia! ::

Name: Dayton Gable

Nickname: Day

Age: 16

Birthday: March 5th

Sign: Pisces

Gemstone: Aquamarine

Blood Type: O-

Fav. Food: Beef Stroganoff

Hated Food: Any seafood dish.

School: Horizon Institute for Technology and Science

Hobbies:

Birdwatching - An avid animal lover, Day is very fond of going out and watching birds. She tries to go out out at least once every week to go and watch birds -- be it at the park, or going out of the city to more natural settings. She got into the hobby thanks to her grandfather, as he was an avid birdwatcher, too. He would invite her along on trips, and it would allow them to bond. Dayton keeps a journal of the different types of birds she sees, when she sees them, and what the bird does when she encounters them. She also has an active presence on ornithology forums, which she goes on daily to post or chat with fellow bird-watchers. Every so often, she will go on trips planned with friends from the forums -- about once a month or so.

Lockpicking - Dayton got into lockpicking due to a desire to work more with her hands. To her, locks are similar to puzzles that need to be solved. Day owns her own set of lockpicks and a variety of different locks that she bought with her own money that she can pick. She keeps at least one lock on her at all times, in case she gets bored. This isn't a hobby that is used in any illegal fashion. Dayton puts it to practical use when necessary (getting locked keys out of a car, opening locked doors for people who can't get into their house, etc), and has a career as a locksmith in mind for a potential job later on in life.

Backpacking - One way that Day likes to clear her head is to go out on a hike in the wilderness. It allows her to be one with nature, and gives her a chance to get away from the hustle and bustle of city life. Not only that, but it also gives her an opportunity to view animals out in their natural habitat, which is something that the teenager enjoys immensely. With an interest in studying the emotions of animals, the perfect place to do that is in their natural setting. Dayton plans backpacking trips at least once a month to different locations. If unable to go out for multiple days at a time, then she will also hike in her surrounding areas as well, in order to get the fresh air she enjoys.

PERSONALITY
Virtues:

Level-headed - Dayton has the patience of a saint, or so her family claims. It takes a lot really ruffle her feathers. A person would have to do some serious prodding or be quite offensive in order to sway her. She does her best to let things run off her shoulders and remain calm. Don't expect her to complain or get angry very often. Instead, folks will generally be met with a quiet temperament. Others might think Day to be a bit stoic in this regard, but she doesn't see it that way. She just doesn't see the reason to let her emotions get the better of her right off the bat.

Humble - Dayton is the last person who would brag about herself. Ever since she was a young girl, she was conscious about not bringing attention to herself. She has no desire to be in the spotlight - let others take the glory. She's perfectly fine with hanging back. When attention is turned her way, Dayton always does her best to downplay herself, as well. The last thing she wants is to come off as arrogant or in need of attention. Her help in situations, in her eyes, isn't strictly necessary -- but it can be beneficial from time to time. She views herself on the lowest position of a totem pole, when it comes to being in groups or with others.

Flaws:

Low Self-Esteem - Unfortunately, Dayton doesn't think very highly of herself. No matter how well she does at something, she is never very proud of what she accomplished. She should be, and she knows that -- she has a wonderful support system as far as family goes -- but she just doesn't see it, ultimately. One could try and tell her over and over again, and she might agree for a brief moment, but it's never for very long. It can frustrating to those around her that she doesn't see what they see in her, which can lead to arguments. She needs to gain more confidence in herself and her abilities, but it's going to take time. Her self-esteem can also be a limiting factor for the teenager. Because she doesn't believe much in herself, she is less likely to step out of her shell or put herself out there to show others that she truly can shine.

Timid - Day is very much an introvert and has been from the time she was young. Being in large groups of people is often intimidating to her, and she is hesitant to go and put herself out there. She is afraid that people won't like her or that they'd judge in some way. When pushed into a situation where she's put on the spot like that, she often gets flustered and finds herself unable to talk or avoids the gaze of other people. She's also startles very easily, to the point where her father jokes she's just like a deer.


PHYSICAL DESCRIPTION

Eyes: Violet in color, large in size, and deep set in shape.

Hair: Day's hair is light orange in color and naturally wavy in texture. She often wears it swooped to one side with some sort of bow or clip in it as an accessory. She is never seen without something in her hair.

Face: Dayton has a heart-shaped face with no freckles or scars. Her ears are small.

Clothes: N/A - HITS student.

Hello Mriae,

I will try to help you with this profile as you requested in the main thread!

Hobbies

• As a note, it is best to have at least one non-solitary hobby, or one you can define as flexibly non-solitary. Hobbies are often use as a springboard to start RPs and make connections, so the more useful they are RPwise, the better!
  
  
• Birdwatching - Is there any point at which Day explores birdwatching with others? For example, does she brows forums dedicated to birdwatching where she posts her experiences? Does she schedule with others to go out on nature hikes and do the birdwatching thing?
  
  
• Lockpicking - Lockpicking often skirts the line into illegal unless she is expressly picking locks that she keeps on hand. While highly useful, it is a tricky topic. Does she actually use this hobby in a strictly legal way, or does she also break into people's houses or abandoned buildings? How does she deal with the questionable legality of it? Does she offer this hobby to friends who lock themselves out of their homes? Does she want to explore becoming a locksmith as a part-time job during school someday?
  
  
• To bolster this profile, I suggest adding another hobby that could tie into one of the above, like nature hiking (which would address how she gets about to bird watching) or urban exploration (which would give her much-needed experience in exploring when she becomes a senshi and explain the origins of learning lockpicking perhaps).

Virtues

• I do enjoy that humble and low self-esteem are positive and negative reflections of what is essentially the same trait! As a note, you can also use hobbies to reflect in these virtues and flaws.
  
  
• Patient - This virtue reads more as level-headed rather than patient. I suggest changing the virtue to that, or incorporating more examples and explanations of her patience into this virtue to keep with the title aspect.
  
  
• Humble - If you wanted, you could split this virtue into conscientious for how she prefers to support others, in addition to humble. If you prefer to keep it to humble, I suggest addressing more of her humbleness (what if she is confronted about simply taking a compliment? Can you explain how this virtue comes up in other settings rather than compliments, like if her humbleness means that she interprets her roles in a group setting less as 'needed' and more as 'wanted'?) It would also help to remove the piece about supporting others, as it addresses a different type of virtue. This doesn't mean it is automatically removed from her character - she is still welcome to support others in RP - but it sharpens the focus on the humble trait specifically.

Flaws

• It's great to tie virtues and flaws together, but it's also possible to use flaws that are entirely unrelated to virtues! As a general rule for flaws, it's good to explain why others look down on this character trait.
  
  
• Low Self-Esteem - Do people get frustrated with her due to her stubbornness about her support system? Can you give examples where low self-esteem impacts Dayton negatively?
  
  
• Timid - This looks good as-is!

Senshi-Side

• For all senshi magic, you will want to include the number of uses per battle, the range in which she can cast the attack, and any other special modifiers like a need for line of sight, or instances where the attack can be prevented or broken.
  
  
• Energy Boost Is the energy boost substantial enough to allow a senshi another cast of their magic? Is it enough to add seconds to a knight's magic pool? If so, you may want to define this in the magic itself. How can this attack be interrupted by the enemy? What is the range in which she can cast on someone? For example, if the nearest person is 20 feet away, can she still cast on them? What about 30 ft? Having an inclusive range will help! Additionally, I suggest changing 'the immediate ally next to her' to 'an ally of her choice', as basing magic on location can get rather confusing in big battles, and this gives her more flexibility upon whom she bestows her magic.
  
  
• Energy Rejuvenation - Mostly the same questions regarding range and how this attack can be disrupted. Additionally, the boost time jumps quite ignificantly from her basic attack - you may want to consider increasing the energy boost to 30 seconds and reducing the energy rejuvenation to one minute! Again, suggesting the ability for her to choose her targets here!
  
  
• Sunlight Glimpse - Does the bright ball of light hover above her, therefore blinding others when they look at her? This attack gets a little confusing for me to read, as it seems to indicate that people are only blinded when facing her, and yet it is an AoE which implies that those within the radius are blinded. How long does the blinding effect last? How long does the AoE last? Is there a way to interrupt this attack? Does it affect allies, enemies, or both?
  I would suggest that this attack be a placeable AoE where the ball of light becomes the epicenter, and all enemies who step into the AoE find themselves temporarily blinded. The AoE could last 30 seconds, and anyone getting blinded within it suffers an additional ten seconds of recovery time if they manage to stumble out of it. Remaining in the AoE extends blinding time. Additionally, I would suggest toning down the radius - this attack currently has a sixty-foot diameter, which is quite large! 20 feet should be workable for this!

Overall, this profile is an excellent solid start! It just needs a few expansions in areas to add a robust finish. I hope you have a lot of fun playing her!



Edit - I forgot to mention, I am not a mod so you don't need to do anything that I suggested or asked for, and an actual mod will come by to crit or stamp your stuff provided you posted for crit/stamp in the appropriate thread!

No problem! Song pointed out that her celestial body is not valid as it is a theoretical body, so you may want to pick another! Parameters are basically that it has to be real, and not yet claimed.

Best of luck~

Hey Mriae!

Strick got you most of the way there, but I do have a couple more things before I can drop a stamp!

For her Basic attack, I think 30 seconds is a far more appropriate duration for a minor restoration of energy! However, for her Super, there does need to be a set time, not a range -- I would suggest 40 seconds. I would also recommend giving her a longer range than "directly next to her," since that's kind of restrictive!

For her Eternal, how long does the blinding effect last? Also, unfortunately, 30ft is much too large as a radius - it should be closer to ten feet!

If you have any questions, or once you've made changes, please quote me and I'll be back~

Looks good!



A GM will be by soon to give her another look~

Looks good to me, too! Have fun playing!