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 Posted: Sat Nov 14, 2015 7:31 pm
Her shoulder met the door hard and Sidney grunted, swearing softly as she dug into her bottomless pit of a bag for her keys with one hand, a bottle of vodka in the other. They eluded her for a long time despite the jingling as she swished her hand around inside of it. Her head spun and she giggled softly, leaning to press her forehead to the cool surface. It felt good, helping her slow the dip and wobble of reality before the ring finally came into her hand and she pulled her keys free. The distance from hand to lock felt like miles and every time she tried to close that distance, her aim proved subtly off and the end of her key hit the side of the lock, rather than the center. Another swear fell from her lips and after a few repeat and unsuccessful attempts, she had to actually hold the lock with one hand and wiggle the key around with the other before it found the hole and slid in, vodka bottle tucked securely under her arm. When Sid finally got the door unlocked and turned the handle, she practically fell through it as it swung open, forgetting she'd been leaning against it until it's support was suddenly ********..." She moaned as she struggled to her feet, remembering this time to close the door behind her. Didn't want Rob yelling at her again... Shuffling across the floor, the small woman headed for the stairs in a wobbling, wandering gait. The toe of her boot hit the bottom step and Sideny suddenly found herself on the floor, knees and palms aching from the impact. All she wanted was to ******** get into bed, was that so ******** much? Christ...Forgoing walking entirely for the stability of hands and knees, Sidney crawled up the stairs without further incident, her bottle thunking against the stairs in her deathgrip on it. Across the floor she went, still on hands and knees, and into her room, the door banging against the wall as she shoved it open. Bed was forgotten as magenta eyes spied something under the bed through the drunken, buzzing haze she floated in and Sid made for it, dragging various boxes out from under it until one in particular found her hands and she flopped down with it between her kneels, back to the bed as she began to rifle through the papers inside of it.
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Posted: Sun Nov 15, 2015 1:42 pm
He'd heard her come in. He couldn't help but hear her come in, with all the banging and thumping and cursing. Rob lay in his bed, wondering if he shouldn't start sleeping with earplugs in. Checking his clock, he sighed at the hour. Not that he was much better at getting to sleep at a decent hour, but he'd just fallen asleep after a night spent in the studio working on a new song. Sid was home fairly early for her, and from the sound of it drunk off her arse again. He wondered if she did if for fun or as self-medication. Either way, this was getting old. Waiting until she banged her door against the wall between their rooms, he tossed the covers off him and stood, listening. What was she doing in there? She'd probably passed right the ******** out on her bed, as usual. One of these days she was going to puke her guts out while passed out and inhale it and suffocate to death. That was the most ******** stupid way to die he'd ever heard of, even more stupid than straight-up overdosing. The silent rustling bothered him more than the noise had. Finally he'd had enough of waiting. "Sidney! What the ********, woman?" he ranted as he stomped out of his room and toward the doorway of hers. "I'm ********' trying to sleep and you come banging in YET AGAIN, pissed out of your ******** mind. If you forgot to close the front door behind you again, you've got a problem, god damn it, and his name is Rob Anybody!" Reaching her doorway, he stopped and stared for a moment at her, on the floor rifling through a box of papers. "What in god's name are you doing?" he asked, dumbfounded.
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Posted: Sun Nov 15, 2015 2:33 pm
Sid wobbled as she heard stomping down the hallway, the sound reverberating inside of her head. She squinted through the darkness at the figure that appeared in the door way, trying to make the two figures resolve into one so she could properly identify who it was. Oh. Rob. "D'you know..." She mumbled as she lifted her bottle hand to wag a finger at him. The few inches of liquid at the bottom sloshed against the glass with a sweet sound, but Sid was more interested in the man in the door way and the magazine clippings she held than the liquor at the moment. "D'you know..." She tried again, struggling to order her thoughts past the comfortable, muffling haze she'd achieved through dedicated application of alcohol and newly purchased narcotics. "We were goin t' get married in... Haway... Hawaiiiiii?" They said you weren't supposed to mix alcohol with some kinds of things, but look! It had hardly hurt at all to say that. Sid's gaze dropped back to the pictures she clutched and she let them fall, fumbling to pick up the advertisement showing a view of white sand and teal water behind the amber yellow of a Corona bottle. The young woman stabbed her bottle finger at it, holding the picture much too close to her face as she frowned at it. "Ice promised. We saved money for moooooooonths... Like... I gave up coffee." Sid groused.
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Posted: Mon Nov 16, 2015 1:09 pm
Rob blinked stupidly and stared at Sid. Was she just talking about getting married? In Hawaii? What the hell was she even on about? She'd mentioned Ice before as the guy she left in New York City, but he couldn't recall her ever mentioning that they were serious enough to want to get married. Or maybe it was just that he was exhausted and misremembering, that was entirely possible. Maybe even mishearing her now. He'd have to ask again in the morning, if he remembered to this time. But what had triggered this rather excessive even for Sid bout of drinking and whatever else? And he was sure she'd done something else -- a simple bottle of vodka wouldn't get her this annihilated. There were going to be no coherent answers out of her tonight. He sighed and rubbed his face, as he'd done several other nights since she'd moved in and come home at all hours paralytic out of her mind. Best he could do would be to just listen to her ramble on through whatever chemically-induced stupor she was riding. Maybe he could glean some information out of it in the end. He hoped it didn't have anything serious to do with Ice and was just a random burbling up of memories. He'd already vowed to punch Ice in the face if he ever met him. Stepping into her room, he reached for the vodka bottle, already doubtful he'd get it away from her. She had a way of hanging onto something until long after she should have let go. "Look, let me put this up so you don't ******** break it and cut yourself open," he grumbled. "What else did you do tonight? In case I have to call an ambulance."
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Posted: Wed Nov 18, 2015 4:00 pm
His questions creased her face in a frown as she struggled to order her thoughts enough to understand what he was asking, let alone assemble an answer out of the thoughts that kept slipping through her fingers. Her concentration on that, Sid allowed Rob to take her bottle with only an absent minded grunt of assent. Yeah, sure... didn't want to cut herself..."Did I do?" She echoed, her face scrunching as she struggled to pull the memory out. Suddenly her face cleared, though only to fall into a frown and curl of a lip in disgust. "Went to the... pawn shop. Sell my brooch. Iiiiice wouldn't... wouldn't ********'... buy it. a*****e." " Store credit only!" Sid mimiced in a high falsetto, anger building as she latched onto the memory. "So... so I took it to Jim... Jimmy... Joe's place. HE bought ******** brooch. Not like I didn't ******** buy Ice's ******** fix how many times, ********... But nooooooo. He's all clean and s**t and gotta ********... ruin it for everyone." Her anger burned hot suddenly, resentment and hurt she'd buried for so long bubbling up out of the box she kept it locked safely away in where it couldn't affect her. The alcohol and the recent fix wore down her restraints and suddenly she was angry at Ice, finding him an easy scape goat. Sid's hands darted into the box and came up with fist fulls of pictures, all cut or ripped from magazines, all with something on them that at one time had meant something to her. She remembered, in a hazy way, lazing across their bed some late afternoons with the sunlight streaming through the window and all the pictures carefully spread out around her over the coverlet. A young woman's wedding dreams, carefully, secretly hoarded because she'd felt silly even having them, let alone showing them to her fiance. They weren't a normal couple, they didn't lead normal lives... if anything, they happily worked to smash the idea of what was 'normal' and 'acceptable' and 'proper'. Wedding cakes with little pink roses and baby's breath tucked into her hair were a guilty pleasure she'd kept hidden safely away in a little shoe box tucked under their bed. Sid shoved them at Rob's chest and let go to grab up more and shove them at him again, fumbling and scattering clippings across the floor between them. Anger smoothed some of the slurr from her words, though they wandered as badly as ever, following a wobbling train of thought she never realized he might not follow. "I tried, ok? I really ******** TRIED. I got clean for him, so we could get married and start... start a life. Mrs. ******** Zähne... I wanted his name! I wanted... him and s**t and nothing mattered, as long as Ice was there, and he ******** changed!" The small woman ranted, her voice shaking as she grabbed a picture of a lace sheath dress with string straps and ripped it in half, shredding those pieces again before a picture of a hotel followed suit, the bits of glossy, torn paper fluttering to the floor when she released them. "Everythin all... hard and sharp and... ******** real and he can't.. can't even stay MY Ice."
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Posted: Thu Nov 19, 2015 11:01 am
It took a few beats for Rob's exhausted brain to connect the dots through Sid's ranting. Zähne… Wasn't that the last name of the guy who owned that pawn shop he sometimes did work for? Careful to pronounce it TSAY-nuh, like he'd said… "Ice," he said aloud, unsure and uncaring if Sid heard him or not. Of course. Ice, short for Isaiah. The same guy she'd left behind in New York. He was here, and apparently they'd run into each other, likely in more of a capacity than just Isaiah going to one of Chou's shows. He sank to the floor, curling his legs into a crossed position amid his dear friend's scattered, shredded dreams, and let her continue her tirade. That was the only thing he was certain he should do at the moment. He'd sworn to himself that he'd beat the crap out of Ice if he ever ran into him, for whatever he had done to make Sidney flee and seek refuge in his house. But picking through the screamed memories he wondered who had broken who's heart back then; he only knew Sid's side of things, clearly, but he wondered if it hadn't been Ice who'd been wronged in the end. Maybe neither of them were in the right, or in the wrong. And both of them too caught up in their own wounds to see it. He still wanted to hit something, he just wasn't sure it was Ice any longer. It sure as hell wasn't Sid. Rob was no relationship counselor by any stretch of the imagination. He wasn't about to offer advice, not now, probably not ever. Yet he hated to see Sidney so hurting. And he was scared for her, scared of what other chemicals she'd bought with the money from pawning her brooch and used, washed down with a vodka chaser. Some of those drug combinations could kill you. Best to stay with her until she came down. "Sid," he said firmly, reaching out for her. "Sid, I'm here. Go ahead, get it out of your system."
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Posted: Sat Nov 21, 2015 6:32 pm
Picture after picture fell to Sid's hands, old dreams torn into ragged-edged pieces as she took out her frustration and anger and grief. Finally, she snatched the box entirely and pitched it across the room with a frustrated growl. The cardboard box smacked into a stack of CDs and they fell in a clattering waterfall of plastic across the floor. Suddenly, a sob broke from Sid as she sank back, her anger exhausting itself to leave behind only sadness and loss. She felt Rob's hands and she hiccuped pathetically, burying her face in her hands as she struggled to stop the world from spinning around her. It didn't feel muffled and pleasant any more, it felt heavy... too heavy. "I don't... don't want any of this..." She choked out, rocking back and forth there on her knees in the shredded paper. "I want m'life back..." But it wasn't coming back, she knew that well enough. That just made her want it more though, pine for it like she'd never wanted anything, ever. Everything had been better before, even the bad times... She'd had Ice then and that had been all she ever needed. Without him, nothing had any sort of meaning. She'd thought it would be better, but it wasn't... If she could just take it all back, if she were offered that right here and right now... She was pretty sure she'd grab for it with both hands. "I don't want to do this any more..." Sid sniffled, scrubbing at the tears that ran down her face. She turned at last and reached for Rob, scooting closer on hands and knees until she could tuck herself against his side and bury her face into his chest. He still felt warm from his bed and smelled like sleep and she wanted to sink into it and never come up again. Why did everything have to be so hard? It wasn't fair.
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Posted: Sun Nov 22, 2015 9:49 am
With the faintest of sighs, Rob gathered Sid into his embrace and let her cry against him. "It's alright, love. You're safe here," he murmured, his voice still rough from sleep as he rubbed her back. He knew that wasn't what she wanted, safety and security and a friend who wouldn't let her do anything to harm herself; she wanted her old life back, living on the edge with Ice and their plans to get married. There wasn't anything he could do about that, though, and a part of him regretted it. He'd do anything for Sid. He still wanted to punch something. Maybe Ice. He would definitely be giving the man a talking to, if for no other reason than to get his side of things. And if he wasn't satisfied with the answers, well... "Come on, let's get you into bed." Gently Rob slid one arm beneath Sid's legs and scooped her up, then somewhat clumsily got to his feet. She felt so small and slight and helpless in his arms; all he wanted to do was protect her from the bad things out there. He wasn't thinking of youma and Chaos agents either -- he was thinking of hard drugs and pain and shattered dreams. But he knew he couldn't. He was only one man, after all, and she was a grown woman. There was only so much he could do as her friend. He couldn't protect her from everything. Shuffling through the shredded pictures on the floor, he carefully deposited her on the rumpled bed and tucked the lone blanket around her. He sat down on the bed next to her, smoothing her hair off her face. He was still angry with her and grumbly about being awakened by her, but he'd stay with her all night if he had to. And it was looking more and more likely that it would come to that. It was going to be a long night, he sighed mentally.
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Posted: Sun Nov 22, 2015 11:11 am
She might feel bad later, when she found out how badly she had broken down. For dragging Rob into it and making him deal with it when she didn't even like dealing with it herself. For now, though, his solid warmth was needed and clung to like a life raft. His care was more than she deserved, but Sid would never be one to refuse anything someone gave her without prompting. If he wanted to take care of her, she was going to take it without a thought. She wrapped an arm around his neck as he gathered her close and lifted her, her boots thunking together as she was settled into bed. Having the blankets tucked around her felt old and familiar, fingers against her face pushing her hair back in a way she remembered too well. It hurt, even through the haze, and Sid reached to catch Rob's wrist, tugging at him. "C'mere... please?" She mumbled as she crossed her ankles and tucked them up behind her, making her already small form smaller. "Stay w'me?" She wanted a body beside her tonight. More than anything, sometimes, that was what she missed most. Rob wasn't Ice and it wasn't fair to him, but it was easier to look to him for comfort than to be strong without it. She'd told him before she wasn't a fighter... this was what she really was, when she couldn't run away from it any more. Someone who clung to stronger people because she couldn't stand alone.
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Posted: Sun Nov 22, 2015 8:08 pm
Rob studied her face, partially lit from the light in the hall, as her tiny hand wrapped around his wrist. Sid seemed so small and vulnerable, especially now in her drugged-up, drunken state. He was afraid to leave her alone -- not that he thought she would do anything to herself that she already hadn't done, but more that she might not wake up. He still had no idea what other intoxicants she had done tonight besides the vodka. "Alright," he finally sighed. "Let me turn the light off. I'll be right back. I promise." As he got up and trudged through the cloud of paper on the floor, he half-hoped she'd just pass out. She seemed on the verge of it already. But again there was that fear: what if something happened to her? He would feel horrible if she were alone and helpless and puking her guts up. And he really did feel a certain protectiveness toward her, as if she were incapable of taking care of herself. He knew better, of course. He thought. Flipping the light switch off, Rob made his way through the darkness back to Sid's bed and climbed in, pulling the blankets up over the two of them. He pondered taking off her boots so she didn't kick him in the balls or something while she slept, but decided that he couldn't be arsed. With an exhausted sigh he curled his body around her back, automatically wrapping a protective arm around her as he settled into the bed and covers. "Goodnight, Sid," he murmured into her hair, then without thinking kissed the back of her head. Before too long he was asleep.
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