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Posted: Sat Oct 10, 2015 7:12 pm
He was tired beyond belief. The sleepless nights, the missions, the daily drudge had taken it out of him in a way they never had before. But, Horace was back on the island, for better or worse, he thought. All he wanted to do was sleep for ten or twelve hours, but he kept dreaming he was back in that ******** forest. It felt like his brain had too many things to pick from and just decided to regularly cycle through his worst experiences. It was great. He rubbed a hand over his face as he walked. Horace had dropped his things off in his room, surprised that no one had stolen anything from it. It had been left unlocked all this time because he didn't care enough to lock it. Three months was a long time, but even he knew he had nothing of worth on the island. Or off of it, for that matter. But now, now he stood in front of a door, both hoping someone was home and hoping someone wasn't. Horace crackled his knuckles and knocked.
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Posted: Sat Oct 10, 2015 8:36 pm
It was hard to do much of anything when you were without a weapon. It certainly wasn't the first time as he had been cuffed once for attacking Rep in an Infirmary, but that didn't mean he was alone. Saliva was silent for days that melted into weeks, and while his stitches went out and he was told she would return, he still felt too raw and exposed without her not to mention that he couldn't do much.
There was an upside that there was plenty of work to do on the island at least between helping to runic all the new and old equipment, help any numerous repair projects, and overall Life volunteering in the Infirmary to tend to those still in need of care. Or course, there was plenty of clean up too. It left him able to come home and sleep deeply, though it didn't help him escape his own worries at home with Jan and his slow disintegration due to Rin.
Out of the shower and recently changed, Melvin was looking at home décor magazines when he heard the knock. It was strange as no one visited him anymore and Jan had his own keys.
Rising up, he went to the door and slowly opened it, surprised to see –
"Horace?"
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Posted: Sat Oct 10, 2015 8:42 pm
The click of the door opening made him tense, uncertain who might open the door. It was Melvin, and all the words Horace had prepared melted away. He'd spent so long formulating things to say, ways to phrase eloquently how Melvin had hurt him, how their friendship had been shattered. Instead, his tongue tied. Horace stared blankly at Melvin for a moment. And then he punched Melvin in the face, aiming for his nose.
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Posted: Sun Oct 11, 2015 7:04 am
He had expected at least some words as was customary when seeing someone you hadn't seen in months. A hello or at least a "you bastardized" to prepare him for what mood Horace might be in, but the sudden impact to his face that sent him hurling back and falling into the floor made it all very clear. It also reminded Melvin how strong hunters were when you yourself didn't have anything in your corner. Nose broken and bleeding, Melvin blacked out for a few seconds before coming too, holding his face as it started to pour blood and punching the broken bridge to somehow keep the flow down.
Laying on the floor, he looked down and sighed. Stain. He was thinking of getting them replaced anyways. The magazine said crane colors would work well but maybe red if he kept getting hurt - which was likely.
He staggered up to his feet and took out his handkerchief to cover his nose. "Hello Horace." Melvin said, voice muffled. He felt light headed and went to take a seat.
"Is that all?"
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Posted: Sun Oct 11, 2015 7:55 am
"No," he said, stalking after Melvin. "Stand up." And because Melvin wasn't moving fast enough for Horace (if he intended to stand at all), Horace grabbed him by his shirt, hauling him out of the chair. Holding him up with one hand, which was as awkward a position as it sounds, Horace aimed another punch at Melvin's jaw. Then he let go of Melvin's shirt.
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Posted: Sun Oct 11, 2015 8:59 am
Hauled to his feet, he felt a wave of dizziness before he rose his hands to protect his face. It buffered the impact but it still managed to nick his arm and hit his lower jaw. At least it wasn't worse. When Horace released, Melvin let him slump down to sit, refusing to stand. If he learned anything from junior high, it was to let a bulky tire out of their anger instead of giving anything to fuel their fire.
He took his glasses off and put them in his pocket to avoid them getting broken and looked up, waiting to see if another punch was coming.
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Posted: Sun Oct 11, 2015 10:00 am
"Fight back," he hissed, hands curling into balls at his sides. Horace looked down at the bloodied face of the person who used to be his friend. Though, he doubted and would always doubt that Melvin had ever been his friend in the first place. He felt used and as though he were of no more important than a buzzing fly. Nothing he ever did, nothing he ever felt meant anything. His mouth curled into a sad line. "You're still a piece of s**t, Melvin." But he did not hit him again.
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Posted: Sun Oct 11, 2015 10:06 am
He brought the handkerchief to his nose and pulled it away to inspect the blood before folding it and pushing it back in his nose. He remained sitting, looking up at the other.
"Yes. I know. I'm a piece of s**t and a monster. I destroy those around me and have little to offer back. I never deserved your friendship not anyone else's." He was poor in any interaction he had and relied on the kindness of others while that kindness often hurt them. He destroyed Rin. He was destroying Jan. He ruined Horace's trust in him.
"I'm sorry, but at least you know."
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Posted: Sun Oct 11, 2015 10:17 am
He snorted derisively. Horace didn't have time for Melvin's usual threads of conversation. Well, he had time, but he didn't want to hear it. He'd heard it all before and none of it ever made sense.
"At least I know," he repeated, almost incredulously. "Hah. Knowing was a matter of time. You told me only because you knew I'd be upset. Like telling me makes it somehow a better thing to do. No, you knew I'd be upset and you ******** did it anyway, Melvin." This was the sort of thing he had never foreseen happening, mainly because it was something he himself would have never done. He would not have had sex with 'Rin', because that body belonged to Jan and Jan had been romantically involved.
Even in his own mind, he snorted as his use of 'romantically'. Beyond that, he still would not have begun shacking up with a friend's ex the day after they broke up. "Stand up, Melvin. Fight back, you ******** idiot." He had to be angry or he was going to cry again.
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Posted: Sun Oct 11, 2015 10:43 am
He only listened and nodded, still watching him. They already had this discussion on Twitter and there wasn't much he could say in defense for what he did. It was what it was. Messy, cruel, and complicated.
"I did. I won't deny that, but I can't help what I felt and I'm not going to feel bad for loving him anymore. You know and can hate me. I don't blame you. I'm a pretty s**t person for how this was all handled, but I knew it would make you upset."
He did not get up. "You can hit me again. You have all the reasons you need to do that. I just have no reason to fight you back."
And he paused a moment. "Are you going to punch Jan too?"
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Posted: Sun Oct 11, 2015 10:59 am
"You just... you're never going to understand why I'm upset. You're never going to understand and you don't care enough to even try. I'm ******** tired of people pretending to listen to me, pretending to care, but they don't. They never do." He hated the way his voice wavered. Horace was tired of how everyone glossed over him: Horace the inconvenience. He thought, for a moment, that maybe it would have been better to stay in the wood, to never come back. There, he could have had an illusion, for a while. Maybe it would have been enough in the ways he was not. It came down to this, though. He just didn't matter enough. "I can't fight an idiot if they refuse to fight back. Even if you're a son of a b***h, I don't have to be." Bitterness coated his words. "It doesn't ******** matter what goes on between me and Jan, now does it?"
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Posted: Sun Oct 11, 2015 11:25 am
"I might not understand, but don't say things about me that Indont care. I don't like people keep saying things I'm not. I admit I have a hard enough time getting people, but that does not mean I don't try. Even if I might ever get it."
"I wasn't pretending. I care about you, but I also love Jan. I had to make a decision and I told you. What you do with it, what you think of me, is up to you. It seems you are hard set in dismissing everything I was because if it. You also seem to hate enough people that it's easy to throw me in."
And finally he got up to start walking to a chair. "But you are just as guilty of not understanding. Don't pretend you get me either or you cared if we want to start throwing rocks now." He sat down and looked over at him, dabbing his nose again.
"We are both shitty people."
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Posted: Sun Oct 11, 2015 1:54 pm
Horace stifled a bitter laugh and rubbed his hand over his face, knuckles stinging. "I can count the people I hate on one hand, Melvin. But if you wanna paint me as some devil in this, go the ******** ahead. How long did you wait?" He leaned against a wall. Horace wasn't going to sit down, not here. Melvin could say he cared all he wanted, but until he showed that he cared, Horace wouldn't buy any of it, not anymore. "Did you ******** the day we broke up or did you wait until the day after, when I was off the island?"
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Posted: Sun Oct 11, 2015 3:20 pm
Melvin looked at Horace and then at his damaged hand. "That isn't a lot of people." He said as he regarded the man in his home.
He leaned back, licking his upper lip and tasting cooper. Standing, he went to a nearby dresser, opened it, and pulled out a baby wipe to use to wipe his face and nose before setting his handkerchief in the hamper. As he walked slowly, reaching out to touch this surface or that to keep himself steady, he continued talking.
"Does it matter? Does it matter how long I waited before I was with Jan as Jan? No amount of time would have made you happy." He turned, leaning against the dresser. "I don't think you care. I don't think you care about his feelings or ours. Do you think he is yours now? For forever? Even when I asked about you before we were together the first time and he said it was ok? That he wanted it as much as we did?"
He stared back at him, quiet.
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Posted: Sun Oct 11, 2015 7:50 pm
Horace froze for a second. He couldn't believe that Melvin, of all people, one of the people who had known best about how he felt, would make an oblique joke about that. "Yes, it ******** matters. Because as it stands right now you didn't even think of me, you thought of your poor d**k. And yeah, I care about his feelings, what he has of them. His reactions and his part in this are ******** separate from the way I feel about you." But it was clear that Melvin didn't ******** get it and probably never would. Timing was everything and in this manner, Melvin had breached their friendship. He wanted to paint it in similes, allegories that Melvin would understand, but he knew it wouldn't work. He just... Horace couldn't explain it any more times than he had about how this was the most a*****e thing Melvin could do. It was like his whole life had turned into a "Watch Horace Get Duped/Watch Horace Fail" double feature comedy. "You know what, Melvin, I may not have as many fingers left on this hand, but there's still one just for you, you b*****d." Horace's hand was shaking as he lifted it, displaying one finger rather prominently. Melvin was deliberately hitting below the belt, using information he had learned when he was Horace's friend against him. He was still not to the stage where jokes about his hand didn't bother him. And now, perhaps, they bothered him even more. Horace paused, debating hitting Melvin again (what good would it do - Melvin would just take it). His mouth twisting, he spat on Melvin's floor and spun around to leave.
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