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 Posted: Thu Aug 13, 2015 8:13 pm
A little after one in the morning, Hitch finally unlocked the door to his apartment and kicked off his boots at the door, wanting to sneak in as quietly as possible. He'd wake Tolli, soon - he probably hadn't eaten anything on his own, had he? - but he wanted to do it gently with caresses and kisses, not slamming doors and thundering footsteps.
It'd been a busy night; he'd actually meant to just come straight home after the later job, but when he caught sight of a youma, it wasn't like he could very well just leave it roaming around out there to do whatever the ******** it wanted. Some bruises and a skinned knee later (that get-up literally did -nothing- for protection did it?), he'd finally taken the ******** b*****d down, but it'd taken more time than he wanted. As satisfying as it'd been to finally put it down, he was still inwardly a little frustrated at all the lost time.
But anyway. He was home now, slipping into the bathroom to kick off his jeans, slip off his work shirt, and slap some peroxide and a band-aid on his knee. He didn't even bother taking his hair down, especially if he was going to be cooking anything, so he went right ahead and slipped into bed beside the lump that was his lover, wriggling half under the covers to seek him out and kiss any part of him he could find.
"Babe. Hey."
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Posted: Thu Aug 13, 2015 8:22 pm
It was rapidly becoming a habit for Tolliver to come back to Hitch's place, instead of Fritz's; and maybe he was getting too used to it by now, too accustomed to the feel of Hitch's warm body next to his, too accustomed to the quiet, cluttered apartment that felt more homey to Tolliver than his own loft. He knew he couldn't continue to avoid Fritz forever - a few scattered, unhelpful and unpleasant texts had been sent here and there so neither of them would worry about where the other was - but it just felt so nice coming home to someone.
Even if it wasn't necessarily his home, not really, but it was starting to feel like it.
Tolliver hadn't eaten, hadn't had the strength to. After coming back from the tattoo parlor, he'd gone back and changed - very slowly and very painstakingly - into a pair of Hitch's boxers and one of his old flannel shirts that was too big for him. This was also becoming a bad habit, but he loved the fact that he could burrow himself down into Hitch's clothes, lose himself in the feel and smell of them.
He didn't stir as Hitch came home, not until he sleepily felt the bed dip and warm lips against his cheek, a soft voice in his ear. Tolliver murmured something incoherent, curled up on his side, and didn't open his eyes, burrowing his face into the pillow.
"...Logan?" he mumbled after a few seconds, voice thick with sleep and weariness, and a note of affection that was still there, even when he wasn't really lucid.
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Posted: Thu Aug 13, 2015 8:44 pm
Yes, home. The home that was actually finally starting to feel like Hitch's for the first time since he moved here, and a thousand percent he believed it was because it was their home, not just his. Some part of him knew it was totally ******** presumptive, it was out of necessity and bad circumstances that Tolliver was here, and he'd probably just return home if things with Fritz got smoothed over. But he couldn't stop himself from thinking it: Their shower, their bed, their fridge, their home. The only thing he ever looked at anymore and called his, and only his, was Tolliver himself.
Speaking of. Goddamn he was cute when he was drowsy. Hitch laughed softly as he shifted, resting his chin on the pillow next to him and sliding a hand down towards his hip. "In the flesh, babe, " he purred warmly, nuzzling into the crook of his neck for a moment - just a moment, really - and indulging in him.
"Sorry it's late, " he whispered, curling a little closer to him. "But are you hungry? - did you eat? I can make somethin' easy?"
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Posted: Thu Aug 13, 2015 8:54 pm
He had tried, very hard, to think of this as Hitch's place versus his place - but so far, Tolliver had not succeeded. It was far too easy to fall into a state of comfortable happiness here, and it had nothing to do with what the place looked like or how old and falling apart it was and everything to do with the fact that it was simply where he felt safe and sound.
As he dragged himself back into the throes of the waking world, Tolliver became more acutely aware of several things. One was the warm and reassuring touch of Hitch behind him, snuggling close. Another was the late hour; Tolliver had fallen asleep sometime around six or seven in the evening, when it was still light out, and now it was dark and shadowy.The third was the steady ache of his back, which, while asleep, he'd been able to avoid, and now was slowly climbing back into his mind.
And he wasn't able to quite mask the soft hiss of pain that edged out through his teeth as Hitch shifted closer, Tolliver's eyes fluttering even as he turned his face towards the pillow, attempting to muffle the sound.
"I ate a little," he murmured, trying to cover up his mistake - and also kind of fibbing, because a little meant a bag of chips as he'd walked home. "How was work?"
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Posted: Thu Aug 13, 2015 9:15 pm
See, the problem with that was Hitch was right there, and he wasn't about to pretend that he hadn't just heard a hiss of air slip from his lover's lips. He frowned, leaning up so his elbow rested on the bed, and his cheek rested on his palm to look down at him.
"Baby?"
He didn't specifically ask if Tolliver was okay; he really didn't have to. His tone was heavy with worry, and his fingertips were tracing up and down his side again, soothingly.
He burrowed his brow and made an almost indignant little noise in the back of his throat. "S'cuse me? A little? - what's a little to you babe, eh?" he questioned, not harshly, but determinedly. "Work sucked a**. What else is new? - how 'bout your day, babe?" In other words, why had he come come to a hissing boyfriend who'd eaten maybe something maybe not.
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Posted: Thu Aug 13, 2015 9:34 pm
He knew it would be too hard to pretend that he hadn't just made a sound of pain, because Hitch was literally right next to him, and would most likely hear anything he did or said. Still, it had been worth a shot; he didn't want to worry Hitch.
Except that was also impossible. Hitch was already worried, and Tolliver could hear it in his voice, in the gentle way his fingers traced his side. He pressed his face into the pillow, trying to stop the flood of color to his cheeks, guilt rising in his chest for a variety of reasons.
"It was good," he murmured softly, voice still muffled. He should have known Hitch wouldn't believe him. "And I ate...some chips earlier."
His back was throbbing. Tolliver tried to act normal, in spite of everything screaming that it was not.
"I could use something to eat, maybe," he said, in an effort to placate Hitch.
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Posted: Thu Aug 13, 2015 9:42 pm
The fact that Tolliver hadn't answer him at all regarding the hiss of pain just got him even more worked up. He shifted just a little closer, not quite touching, but lifting the blanket for a peek underneath. It yielded no results at all, but that didn't really satisfy him.
"Chips? You call that some food? - was that all you had today?" His mouth gaped open. "Jesus ********' christ Tolli, you tryin' to give me a heart attack? Like you're not ********' thin enough already!" He really wasn't one to talk since he mostly picked at breakfast, skipped lunch, and his only really solid meal was usually dinner with Tolliver - and he worked all day - but that was seriously beside the point here.
Food, yes. But, "First you gotta tell me what's wrong, " he insisted stubbornly, sitting up and crossing his arms over his chest. "Then you're eating a ********' hamburger. Maybe two."
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Posted: Thu Aug 13, 2015 10:28 pm
Fortunately, he was wearing a shirt - namely Hitch's - and it was too large for him, covering all the way down to his thighs, and successfully hiding the bandages from view. Tolliver himself, however, was much less convincing in his attempts.
"...maybe," he murmured, and maybe he was a little on the slender side, bordering on too skinny. He'd lost a little weight in the past several days, both from his depression over the Fritz incident and his general anxiety over life; and much of the time, he couldn't quite work up the energy to actually get up and eat, unless Hitch cooked for him.
His face reddened.
"Nothing's...wrong..." Tolliver said stubbornly, but a shift made him wince, and his fingers curled into the pillow.
"...my back," he mumbled finally.
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Posted: Thu Aug 13, 2015 11:21 pm
He didn't believe 'nothing' for a second - he was just waiting patiently for Tolli to finally fess up and tell him what'd happened.
His back? Hitch didn't ask any more questions after that; half-frantic, he pulled the blanket right off of Tolliver, and he was more gentle as he tugged his flannel up to reveal his lover's back. Bandages. Bandages everything, thick and taking up most of his back. A startled sound caught in Hitch's throat and he rocked, gliding a finger lightly, so very lightly, over the plain of white.
"What happened?" He breathed it out first, like he was shaken; then, he didn't give Tolliver a chance to answer before he snarled. "Who the ******** did this to you?!" He wasn't yelling at Tolliver. But - "I'll ********' kill them! I'll ********' rip their ********' faces off an' shove 'em so far up their asses, I'll ********' - who the ******** did it?!"
He should've been there. Eurydike should have been there. God ******** DAMNIT, the one person he gave a ******** about in this entire damn city and --
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Posted: Thu Aug 13, 2015 11:31 pm
He probably should have been more clear, in hindsight. Or at least told Hitch that he was just fine, or that he had, you know, actually gotten a tattoo and had not been in some accident or something. Tolliver knew of Hitch's reactions from the incident at the club, and also before; his temper was quick.
He was startled at the rapid jump to his defense, Tolliver's eyes snapping wide - but at the same time, he couldn't help the heavy flush of pleasure that crossed his face, because the protectiveness was oddly endearing, even with the yelling. It was clear indication of Hitch's feelings, and it made Tolliver feel warm and secure inside.
Slowly, steadily, he sat up, and Tolliver turned, caught Hitch's face with his hand, and turned his head so that he could kiss him, softly and sweetly, trying to silence him. He pulled away after a moment, eyes meeting Hitch's, and Tolliver smoothed away some of the stray hair that had fallen across his forehead.
"Sorry," he said quietly. "I should have - I didn't mean to make you upset, it's not - I'm fine, I promise, Logan. I'm really all right."
His fingertips glided down the side of his face tenderly before they fell away. Tolliver shifted around, turning so that his back was facing Hitch, and then he'd slowly, painstakingly slid the arms of the shirt off and then the rest of it, pulling it into his lap and holding it like a security blanket. He drew one leg up to rest his face on his knee, arms wrapped around it.
"You can look beneath it, it's...well, you'll see."
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Posted: Fri Aug 14, 2015 12:00 am
Hitch was fairly upset - he was projecting his anger, but more than anyone right now he was mad at himself. All this time all he wanted to do was protect Tolli from the ******** weirdos and energy sapping monsters out there, and then he was out and this happened?
Before the kiss, maybe Tolliver would see it, the wild look in Hitch's eyes as he struggled for someone else to blame, someone he could punish, anything to take away from the crushing guilt that was already threatening to pour down on him like concrete. He finally did respond to the kiss, and by the time it ended, the look was mostly gone. But his breaths were shallow as Tolliver brushed his hair away, and he wished he could have just shut his eyes and enjoyed it more, but - Tolliver was hurt, he didn't know who'd done it, and -
All right? Hitch opened his mouth to try and protest because no, Tolliver shouldn't be a hero, and no, he most definitely was not all right at all. He made a deep sound in his throat, clenching and unclenching his fists once, then twice as Tolliver shifted and pulled off the shirt - he'd wanted to help him, knew he was in pain, but his hands were practically ******** shaking so he was about as ******** useless as they got.
"Tolli, " and it sounded like a protest, but he went ahead and looked the way Tolliver had told him to. That was when it finally clicked; no, Tolliver was not hurt. No one had attacked him. It was a tattoo, a beautifully ornate tattoo with music notes and flowers and the whole thing was breath-taking. But --
"Oh my ******** GOD baby - you couldn't have just led with, 'hey Logan, I got a tattoo'?" He was still so far on edge that his voice was raspy, but that moment was probably the closest Logan had come in years to whining. He sniffed, and he ******** hated that he sniffed, dragging his hands over his face because goddamnit. "You're tryin' to kill me, right? Did you take out a ********' insurance plan on me or somethin'?!"
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Posted: Fri Aug 14, 2015 12:09 am
He felt guilty and ashamed of himself for not communicating properly, because the look in Hitch's eyes said everything; how angry he was that he thought someone had hurt him, how frustrated he was that something had happened and he wasn't there. Tolliver was steadily starting to read the cues of his facial expressions, and he felt the shallow breaths, saw the distress, and it ate away at him.
With his back exposed, the skin was red and raw beneath the intricate markings that spread all the way from his left hip, up to his right shoulder. Everything was still tender; sleeping would be a little difficult, and he couldn't lean back on anything for a few days, but it wasn't nearly as bad as it could have been if he'd gotten a more detailed one. Still...
Tolliver felt his face redden further, and he couldn't look at Hitch, his fingers wrapped around his leg.
"I'm sorry," he said softly. "Really. I should have been clearer, I'm sorry, Logan. I was going to show you when it was all healed and everything, but I'm not - I mean, I can't lie very well, and I didn't really want to hide anything from you anyway, just..."
He took a deep, shaking breath, and then exhaled it.
"Hey, Logan," said Tolliver, in a tiny, tremulous voice. "I got a tattoo."
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Posted: Fri Aug 14, 2015 12:37 am
Which meant that for every bit Tolliver felt guilty, every forlorn timber of his voice and all his shyness, Hitch felt like s**t all over again. He got on Tolliver's case for being unclear when he was the one that'd jumped from zero to fifty in like five seconds flat.
"I'm sorry too, " and he reached out to slide a finger delicately along the back of his lover's neck. "I ********' overreacted, I - I'm sorry, " god look at how Tolliver had retreated now. He tried to shed the coil of remorse along with the residual feelings of upset with a deep breath, a grin at his last bit, and fingers running through Tolliver's hair. "Wow, that's so cool! Thanks for tellin' me!"
He paused, eyeing Tolliver darkly before: "Y'know, tattoos are really ********' hot, " he remarked, leaning in to press his lips to his lover's right shoulder. "How long's this gonna take to heal? - don't plan anything for a few days after that, okay?" and he left a playful little n** on the same shoulder.
"Seriously though... that design's - it's beautiful, " he said, wishing he could trace his fingers over the curves of the markings. Instead, he brushed Tolliver's hair away from his neck. "You came up with this yourself babe? - who'd you go to?"
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Posted: Fri Aug 14, 2015 8:26 am
The gentle fingers against his neck and hair and the soft kiss against his shoulder - followed by the playful n** - were succeeding in melting away the guilt from Tolliver's heart. He hadn't wanted to scare Hitch, but he had, and he felt awful for it.
But he tried to move past that, because Hitch was here and he was slowly ebbing back into his normal, teasing self. Unfortunately - or maybe fortunately - the innuendo about keeping his days open went over Tolliver's head, seeing as how he was still ashamed; and he finally craned a look over his shoulder to peek tentatively at Hitch, confusion on his face.
"Why not?" he asked, and then blushed at the compliment, his eyes fluttering half lidded as Hitch moved his hair away from his face. Tolliver leaned into the gesture, eyes closing fully as he breathed out a soft sigh.
"I wanted something, um....just, you know, representative of me," he murmured. "I just - I went to the place down the street, I did a bit of research for a while, and they seemed quite capable, but, well, I just...I wanted something that would...be just me."
He shrugged self-consciously. "I could have asked Fritz to design it, he's the artist, but..."
Tolliver trailed off, eyes pained in the dark.
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Posted: Fri Aug 14, 2015 9:04 am
Hitch's smile turned slyly mischievous as he rubbed his cheek lightly against the same shoulder, but peered directly at Tolliver to meet his eyes. ******** he was so cute. "Cause. I'm gonna do a lot of wonderfully ********' terrible things to you, my sexy a** tattooed darlin'. That clear enough for you?" He leaned up, his breath hot as always against the shell of Tolliver's ear as he purred in a distinctly sexual way, "If you're still confused... I bet I could give you an extra ********' special sample after dinner, babe." After all. Tolli didn't have to be on his back for everything, now did he?
"I love it, " Hitch declared resolutely, already longing to trace his fingers along the intricate lines. Deep down, there was a tiny part of him that was almost jealous, irrationally so - he'd always wanted a tattoo. He didn't know what of, but he knew he wanted something other than freckles and acne scars, something with flavor and personality, something maybe he could look at himself and love when he saw it. The reality was, he'd just never be able to do it; he'd never have the kind of money for something like that. Just another honest reality of life.
But that didn't mean he was any less happy that Tolliver had one - his lover had a sexy a** tattoo he'd get to stare at whenever he wanted, and he'd be able to touch it, kiss it, more. Pretty sweet deal if you asked him. "What are those flowers?" He peeked at them curiously, grinning as he added, "You did a ********' fantastic job. - make me a tattoo sometime, " he teased as he leaned in to press his lips chastely to his neck.
But the pain wasn't lost on him. Hitch eased back, thumbing Tolliver's good shoulder once more. "You didn't take anything for this, did you? - you're allowed to, right?" ******** he hoped so. "I'll get you some ibuprofen an' s**t - that work for you babe?" His words were coarse, but his tone was so soft.
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