|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Mon Jul 27, 2015 7:32 pm
I was going to talk about this in a post on my dorm thread, but I thought it would be better suited in a place where people could add their own comments. It is not really a rant, just my thoughts. Hopefully this subforum is appropriate.
My boss sat me down the other day for unimportant reasons and told me that she did not know what I wanted or what would make me happy as an employee there because I never open up and I push the work "family" away. Essentially, she is able to see when other people are having problems and fix it, but is completely in the dark when it comes to whatever is going on with me. I know that I can be aloof, if only because everyone has to ******** tell me so.
However, I thought I was getting better at being more open about myself and, even though I hate it, engaging people in general boring small talk. I even thought I was getting better about keeping my friends in the loop about things going on in my life, until I learn that sometimes the details that I am giving them make no sense because they lack the context of the overall situation. That said, sometimes I sit in my bed after Skype calls and other extended conversations of that nature feeling like I have overshared. To hear that people still think that I am keeping too much to myself and pushing everyone away is a little surprising.
A little.
Some people at work know that I identify as male. My direct coworker, just because it was something to discuss to help keep the day going, and one. maybe two, of the technicians. We have two clients who are MtF that come in often for exams, boarding, food, or other pet related needs. Every time one or both of the owners are in the building, there are a bunch of shared glances and stifled giggles.
Their dogs were staying with us a few weeks back and my boss, direct coworker, and I were discussing what the owners had requested as part of the care for the dogs. My direct coworker referred to one of the owners as "he" and I corrected, "she."
This led to a conversation where my boss and coworker talked about how strange it was and how they did not really know what the two were "going for." Not knowing the two womens' stories, I explained things the best I could. My boss and coworker just settled on the conclusion that the owners were weird people because it is not something that they could understand.
Maybe, then, I do not want to open up to a group of people who say they want to know me but will just think that I am weird.
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Jul 27, 2015 8:30 pm
I've had to correct both at my workplace a lot, as I tend to get misgendered pretty easily, due to the fact that I still have tits. :c
But I have told my managers that I am trans and they have been nothing but supportive. The co-workers...not so sure. I've been dodged quite a bit.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Jul 27, 2015 8:36 pm
Sifen Yamishi I've had to correct both at my workplace a lot, as I tend to get misgendered pretty easily, due to the fact that I still have tits. :c But I have told my managers that I am trans and they have been nothing but supportive. The co-workers...not so sure. I've been dodged quite a bit. I think my managers and coworkers would show me support if they knew, but it is one of those situations where I will never find it genuine.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jul 28, 2015 9:43 am
In my experience, once you're out and about, nobody is going to care as long as you're doing your job. Why should they? However, correcting coworkers and managers has a time and a place.
If there is a quiet moment in the work schedule and somebody misgenders you, it is best to find a tactful way to explain that you would rather be referred to as "he/she". When it's busy and there's a lot of things going on and a coworker refers to you as a "she/he" (ie: "She can help you on Lane 10, sir/ma'am!"), put your big boy pants or, if you prefer, big girl panties, and get over it. There is a time and a place.
When a manager misgenders you, it is best to speak to them before clocking out. It is a workplace situation and, according to most business policy, should be discussed on the clock. However, here again, there is a time and a place. Just like with coworkers, wait until there is a quiet moment and then explain tactfully and patiently that you would rather be called "he/she".
If either think you're weird or a natural aberration, that's not your problem. What matters in a professional setting is that you work as a team player. Yes, that means making compromises. Get used to it; this is the real world.
Under no circumstances is it appropriate to correct a customer. I understand that this may seem Uncle-Tomish, but you cannot turn on a paying customer while on the clock to correct them and educate them about your personal needs. It's not their problem and it's not yours, either, unless you make it so. If you meet that same customer off the clock while out of uniform, do what you will, but when you are at work, you are being paid to represent a company, not yourself, and you are providing goods and services, not making friends or enemies.
|
|
|
|
|
|
TheCreatureOfHabit Vice Captain
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Reply
