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Homestuck inspired troll related b/c 

Tags: homestuck, troll, breedables, mspa, alternia 

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◢ kolako thelsi ◤ { redblood } ✿ [accepted]

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quite uneventful

Kawaii Garbage

18,425 Points
  • Magical Girl 50
  • Elocutionist 200
  • Unfortunate Abductee 175
PostPosted: Sat May 23, 2015 1:08 am


User ImageName: Kolako Thelsi.
(koh-LAH- koh) - chokola taken from chocolate in creole
(thel-SI) - taken from the Amazon queen, Penthesilea

Blood color: ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ - #722F25

Gender: Female.

Symbol: Cocoa bean!

Personality: Kolako is a very friendly troll that lives off keeping peace with others. She enjoys observing other trolls from a distance and collecting mental data on how they act, and is a very physical troll when she’s in close contact with them-- one would think that because she'd been isolated from society for so long, she'd detest touch, but really, Koko finds a way to initiate physical contact. She really enjoys connecting and building relationships with trolls as she finds them unique and interesting in their own ways.

She doesn't believe in making things fluffy and nice, and besides, she never exactly had the chance to learn fancy or flouncy words while living in the forest. That said, the brown blood may not be eloquent with her wording, but she sure is good at trying to smooth things over. She likes to think of herself as a standalone hero with the gift of gab— She is very good at making friends with other trolls. With her lighthearted voice and friendly, amicable attitude, it’s a sure fire way for her to get on another's good side with the right words and body motions. She'll even back off if someone feels uncomfortable with how close she gets, but it will take time-- Kolako is too used to physical contact!

Kolako is a very adventurous troll, journeying out in the wild woods of Four Fronds with Paipion and searching for food, constantly fighting other beasts and monsters in the forest. Her lusus is a 15ft lion with a penchant for hunting any wild animal he sees, even lusi. If they'd lived in the city, it would be a lot harder to actually control his urges, so she picked an area populated by many beasts-- a place where they could hunt and no one would mind. Yeah, she's seen some pretty grisly stuff in the woods, from hunts to beat ups, but hey, that's troll society. You adapt, or you die. Kolako is a troll who is easily distracted and indecisive. She enjoys to go outside, but often times her hobbies keep her preoccupied and cause her to forget leaving the house. By the time she remembers she CAN go outside, it's almost morning and she cannot go out anymore. Even when she does not forget, Papion constantly warns her about the hunts, which make Koko try and find out when, where, and if they are to happen, being careful to stay in her hive and not leave for the duration of the hunt.

When confronted with the hemospectrum, this low blood doesn't take sides. Although it hasn't been implemented fiercely with her current lifestyle, she dislikes what she's heard of it, and only upholds it because keeps the "peace" to an extent. She is well versed in what it stands for and knows the ways it is used for manipulation due to Papion's warnings, but it does its job. She'd hate it if another troll used their blood rank to undermine or make less of her or any other troll. Due to this, she tries to treat all trolls fairly, but feels very uncomfortable when faced with a situation when trolls of her blood caste are disrespected, abused, or taken advantage of. Her idea of being disrespected is generally anything that has to do with another troll getting trashed on for something they cannot control, like their blood color. High bloods are a little iffy for Koko, making her avoid them in a bad situation. She wants to confront them head on, but usually doesn't know how— So she waits until she can find a way to help. Should she see some troll blatantly taking advantage of another troll, she will stay quiet and wait until they're done, then afterwards try and comfort the victim. If she was the one being insulted, she would most likely hold it in until Papion comes around and steals her away. Should Papion be nowhere near her, she would most likely run and release her anger with a hunt.

Kolako really enjoys arts and crafts. She likes to use her blade to carve pictures or scenes into trees as well as take time and make beaded jewelry for other trolls. She whittles the base from bark she finds or cuts down and actually makes the paint herself, using all natural resources and glazing over it with a special polish she received from a forest flower. She pours over the details, and has actually decorated her tree house somewhat similarly to her own clothes, with beads hanging from the trees and the ceilings as well as light colors all around. She enjoys to lace a few into Papion's fur occasionally! If she finishes a sculpting project, Koko will probably display it proudly in her hive. Especially her whittling! Should she give anyone a personally made beaded necklace, they must be very important to her.

Strengths:"Hoooola chica! How's it goin'? Jajaja!"
amiable: This red blood is both friendly and nice to other trolls, not only enjoying their company but going the extra length and asking questions about their lives. She tries to make other trolls feel comfortable around her, even if she doesn't exactly like them or their ways. She generally tries to be pleasant to others so as to stay on their good sides. Should she see a troll awkwardly sitting away for some reason or another, she'd most likely try to bring them into the conversation and include them.

"Eey, that doesn’t matter! You’re different now, eh?
nonjudgmental: She doesn't let her feelings for one troll judge her feelings for another, and doesn't judge trolls from what others say about them— she would rather meet the troll and then make her own judgement. She is very against "first impressions," and seeks to break that barrier, looking for "the troll behind the mask." Should a troll betray her trust once, Kolako would be the troll to give trolls a second chance. She fiercely believes in redemption.

"Ah... Maybe this'd work, eh?"
resourceful: Kolako knows how to find quick and clever ways to a solution. Though a little unconventional, they will most likely work. She enjoys to bend the rules and find loopholes in a situation. Should the idea offered not work, she will take that into account when trying out new ideas. She loves to collect materials and make them into items she can use for arts and crafts as well items she can use on a daily basis.

Flaws:"Ah... That. Bueno, I hope you feel better?"
detached: It's unintentional, but her morality line goes a bit further than normal. She sees death by gruesome murder as extremely normal and will probably mention how good it wasn't the other and move on, quick. Fight hardened and a little detached from the world, it's almost as if she's watching the world from behind a piece of glass— she's eager to learn more, to understand the sadness and feelings other trolls have toward one another— but she doesn't... Really... get it. Should an acquaintance die, she will probably feel a little bad, and then move on. She's never had a close friend die before. When the situation calls for it, Koko will resort to getting rid of the threat because it's in the way of "peace." While she may be good at talking to others due to her great observational skills, she finds it hard to get on their level of emotions as she hasn't quite felt the way that they have.

"Ey ey ey! What's goin' on here!"
pops personal bubbles: Again, unintentional-- This troll is a very "in your face" type of troll. Koko grabs people freely no matter how much of a stranger they are to her and gets in your face-- Maybe... A bit too close for comfort. She might overstep her boundaries, which other trolls may not appreciate. She grabs their faces to emphasize a point, slaps another trolls arm when they tell a joke, claps their back roughly for an achievement, and so on. She uses a lot of hand movements as she speaks and expresses herself with her entire body rather than only her voice.

"Ay-- what was that! Mira, mira, look at that!"
distracted: Kolako loves adventure! She could plan out a path or specific way she would go to explore. However, when it comes to following a straight, linear path, Kolako is the first to get distracted. Her eyes catch the little things and curiosity overwhelms her to the point of going to check it out. In a conversation, should someone deviate from the old topic to a different, more interesting topic than the current, she would instantly drop the other topic in excitement for the new one.

Weapon: Spear, created by herself! She decorates it with a lot of beads and keeps the feathers she finds from other beasts in the forest. She tries to cover it with the spoils of her hunts, when possible.

Appearance: Kolako is a troll with darting wide eyes and a permanent smile on her face. She has a large overbite and wild hair with ringlets that frame her face and come out from behind her head, as well as short bangs dyed using all natural materials she found in the forest. She uses the juice from a certain fruit as eye-shadow, and has two birthmarks under each eye. Her eyebrows are thin and her horns look like ice cream scoops.

Kolako adorns her body with many beaded bracelets, anklets, and necklaces. She enjoys to create them and spends hours working on each one of them so she can wear a new pattern every time she went out. She loves changing the order of her jewelry. Her clothes are not very fancy-- a simple frock with a different cut to the hem of the dress. The beads are what really make her outfit stand out, using them on every free part of her body, even managing to sew them onto her dress as a belt. She has leg warmers she sewed together and wears no shoes.

Home: Kolako lives deep in Four Fronds, deep in the forest, up in the trees. It is a tree-hive that looks taken over by nature and has beads everywhere, even hanging from the ceiling. Her hive is completely decorated with nature and holds all her whittling projects as well as her different weapons. Papion sleeps outside, downstairs, protecting the hive. She always has the comfort of looking outside and seeing a massive animal down there to protect her. There are no stairs to her hive-- instead, Papion expects her to be able to actually climb up. Until now, Koko cannot and Papi has to lift her, but Koko always tries until she's forced to give up due to her lack of strength.

Lusus: Papion - A large, 15 foot white lion with the fluffiest mane alive, covered in Neapolitan ice cream colored beads threaded in his mane. Papion is very protective of his girl, and accompanies her frequently on hunts. He absolutely adores his little girl and puts her almost on a pedestal, which leads to him constantly being around her and taking care of her almost too much, fussing over his little warrior princess. However, no matter how much Papion fusses and takes care of her, he's afraid his charge won't be able to handle the discrimination of troll society and the violent way most trolls are, thus accompanying her and being attentive should any... inconveniences appear. If anything gets too heavy or uncomfortable for his charge, Papi will pull her onto his back and take her far, far away.

They are very amicable, though that is mostly due to Koko looking up to her lusus. She loves her lusus bunches and respects his wishes, and understands what he says and does is only to protect her-- however, Koko doesn't want to be protected and believes she can protect herself! Due to her wild nature enjoys the liberty the forest gives her to live. When Papi and Koko go on hunts, Kolako usually attacks while Papi jumps in and takes the hit for her.

Power: N/A
PostPosted: Sun May 24, 2015 11:06 pm


Alrighty Quitey! Let’s party. *turns up boombox*

I’m really interested to hear more about Kolako’s extremes, and how she may come into shape interacting with others. Particularly how she manages to be the way she is right smack in the middle of Four Fronds.

My biggest concern is about Kolako’s socializing. Kolako’s a very social troll, but her lusus prevents her from leaving the forest – from childhood even barring her from talking to other trolls. So, I don’t really understand how her social abilities and quirks come into play. How does she get out, or even meet people up close when she normally watches from afar? How is she going to interact with others in the shop, and how will she take part in events? She must be accompanied by her lusus at all times during child stage, so if he’s still intent on keeping her in the woods then that poses a big issue. Also, I appreciate that she doesn’t really understand the political extents of Alternia because she’s been sheltered, but… She lives in the middle of Four Fronds’ Forest. That’s incredibly dangerous, and as a redblood choosing to live in the woods is basically a deathwish! How the heck does she avoid being in the middle of hunts, and why would Paipion set up hive for his child in a highly populated city (and in the epicenter of where lowblooded trolls are hunted for sport, no less) when he describes trolls as “dangerous and killer to a troll of her bloodcolor”?

On that note, I’m unsure about her stance on the hemospectrum considering she doesn’t really experience how the hemospectrum upholds the peace given her isolated location, and given that the “law” in her area is primarily based on the hunting games. Additionally, you mention she doesn’t take sides on the matter but she clearly refuses to tolerate disrespect and dislikes the hemospectrum, which raises some questions! I tend to give these questions a lot to trolls who don’t care about the hemospectrum, so they may be good to provoke thought here. If disrespect was given to her by a high-blood, how would she escape or deal with the situation? Why wouldn’t she take sides if trolls of her blood color were clearly being taken advantage of (when there is facade of “keeping the peace”)? If she would respond, how would she? You mention that she might get angry if there is even slight “disrespect” between trolls… What is her idea of disrespect and would she dare try to intervene on behalf of a lowerblood being disrespected?

I’m really interested to see her detached nature; it’s refreshing to see a troll with her temperament be unaffected by the reality of Alternia. However, this isn’t reading as a flaw. In fact, on Alternia where the dead aren’t treated with respect and where it’s important to move on from constant tragedy, this can be a huge benefit to living in regular society. I would suggest exploring how her lack of experience and emotionality negatively affects her in more regular (in terms of RP interactions with others) scenarios. Does she immediately jump to violence and culling to solve issues because it’s “just the way”? Does she totally lack empathy towards others? One of the things that concerns me is that if Kolako doesn’t understand how other trolls work except through perceived advances (like her use of physical contact), I would imagine it would more intensely affect the way she interacts with others. Particularly when you mention that she is good at calming situations down, which seems like a very complex situation to manage for someone who is more up front and “in your face” when others may not appreciate physical contact or even proximity.

One last thing: This is kind of an awkward note, but Kolako sounds to me a lot like cloaca, and with the definition of the word “risqué”, her name might be reading differently than intended.

OK! There are a few big picture things that need to be hammered out, but I’m liking the direction you’ve got. If anything is unclear or you have any questions let me know!

Sypon
Vice Captain


quite uneventful

Kawaii Garbage

18,425 Points
  • Magical Girl 50
  • Elocutionist 200
  • Unfortunate Abductee 175
PostPosted: Tue May 26, 2015 7:33 pm


addressed everything and a few other inconsistencies! all the edits are in red for easier access! please tell me if i misunderstood anything/edited something wrong, ill be right on it!!
thank you so so much for that crit!! it really got me thinking @__@
PostPosted: Sat Jun 06, 2015 1:08 pm


sup! i read over what sypon said before, and checked out the edits.

the only bits that remain ?? for me are the peacekeeping vs in your face, and in your face vs confronting injustice.

i think if you kept all the parts about her bubbly attitude in one paragraph, then all the bits about how she tries to keep on people's good sides and hash things out in a paragraph below, it would be less jarring. the main problem with how it reads now is that it's her attitude and overly bubbly personality that causes any disputes in the first place. in that case it's a little weird that she's so I AM WHAT I AM while also at the same time working to placate others and keep them happy. i'm sure that's now what you intended, so that's why i'm suggesting separating the two bits to show a more clear divide.

also, She confronts situations head on, not letting them fade with time— If she has a problem, why let it lie? reads as a direct contradiction to Highbloods are a little iffy for Koko, making her avoid them in a bad situation. Should she see some troll blatantly taking advantage of another troll, she will stay quiet and wait until they're done, then afterwards try and comfort the victim. If she was the one being insulted, she would most likely hold it in until Papion comes around and steals her away. Should Papion be nowhere near her, she would most likely run and release her anger with a hunt.

it seems to me that while she may strive to be in-your-face lets-talk-this-out, she lacks the courage and strength and know-how to pull this off for anything that actually matters to her. since you say that she has trouble empathizing, it seems like she finds talking things out easy because she's not affected by the emotion that upset trolls show to her. BUT when she is affected, ie, experiencing hemocaste discrimination which actually upsets her, she can't keep this attitude up and reverts to a more withdrawn stereotypical lowblood defensive behavior. this is totally fine, as long as it's something that is intentional and part of who she is. it could also lead to personal growth opportunities - maybe one day she will be able to step in and talk things out in bloodcaste disputes, with a silver tongue and winning personality that she's been able to develop through her life and experiences?

amicableAggressor
Vice Captain

Versatile Vermin


quite uneventful

Kawaii Garbage

18,425 Points
  • Magical Girl 50
  • Elocutionist 200
  • Unfortunate Abductee 175
PostPosted: Sun Jun 14, 2015 6:18 pm


alright! edited the order of a few sentences,changed a few other things, and added a few edits-- they're either underlined or in green! open for crits again!!
PostPosted: Mon Jun 15, 2015 3:26 pm


quite uneventful
alright! edited the order of a few sentences,changed a few other things, and added a few edits-- they're either underlined or in green! open for crits again!!
what is the blue stuff? i'm getting a little mixed up with your edits. D: also there are some typos that spellcheck should be able to fix, you might want to check that out!

amicableAggressor
Vice Captain

Versatile Vermin


quite uneventful

Kawaii Garbage

18,425 Points
  • Magical Girl 50
  • Elocutionist 200
  • Unfortunate Abductee 175
PostPosted: Mon Jun 15, 2015 4:26 pm


amicableAggressor

blue is also some edits, from before green edits and the underlined ones! i'm so sorry if its confusing you, next time ill be a little more specific and remove the old edits for the new ones ;; if you'd like me to take them off so you can read the text with no colors, i'm definitely willing! sorry again ;;
I also edited a few mistakes! unsure if they're the ones you had in mind;;
PostPosted: Mon Jun 22, 2015 10:01 pm


Hey!! I'm still gonna suggest a couple of tweaks here for flow. Namely, moving: " She doesn't believe in making things fluffy and nice, and besides, she never exactly had the chance to learn fancy or flouncy words while living in the forest." out of the first paragraph, because it's sticking out where it currently is. I would move it to be the first sentence of the second paragraph.

" She'd hate it if another troll used their blood rank to undermine or make less of her or any other troll-- She was alive too, she deserved that respect." <- the second bit (bolded) is awkwardly worded, and it's a tad confusing. I'd probably break the sentence into two so you can lay out the idea that she believes all trolls deserve respect. Or, just take that last part out! I don't think you really need it.

But other than that...

User Image - Blocked by "Display Image" Settings. Click to show.

Sypon
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