|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Fri Apr 10, 2015 6:37 pm
He really...really did not want to have the conversation, in spite of being the one to suggest it in the first place. But something told Chance that if he didn't at least attempt to talk to Finn, that it would either get worse, or things would spiral off into nothingness, and that might have been much more unsatisfactory.
So, with a sigh, he dragged himself to get dressed so that he would at least look somewhat presentable when company arrived, not that he actually cared, or that Finn would care.
Then he waited, sitting on his bed, a sketchpad in his lap.
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Apr 10, 2015 9:11 pm
Something was up. Finn didn't really know what it was exactly, but he knew it was something. He wasn't an idiot. He maybe hadn't been observant enough to realize that he was being avoided all this time, but to be DMd on twitter and asked if he could come and talk, it made him realize, that, actually, he hadn't spoken to Chance in a long time. The other man hadn't made any effort to contact him like he used to. Even on their mission, he'd been different than usual. Not completely distant, but distant enough. The moon hunter had been tempted to deny the invitation to talk. Talking implied some kind of drama ahead, though if it turned out to be so simple as "I don't need you to be my partner", than Finn would likely count himself lucky that that was all it was. He was never so lucky, however. Getting ready took no time at all. He was already impeccably dressed, his hair perfectly styled. All he really needed to do was put on a pair of boots and he was out his door, heading downstairs and to Chance's room, where he raised his knuckles and gave the sun intermediates door a firm knock. And then he waited.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Apr 10, 2015 9:16 pm
He could have just called out like he normally would have - "Come in" - but instead, Chance actually got up, sliding off of the bed and setting aside the sketchpad to get to his feet. He took a small breath, hesitating only a moment before padding across the room to reach for the handle, swinging the door open.
A little smile was on his face as he said lightly, "You could just come in, you know, I don't usually leave the door locked."
Except he had, lately, and he was more or less just attempting to act casual in a situation where he felt anything but. Chance took several steps back to let Finn in, sweeping an arm out to indicate this.
"Feel free to sit anywhere, make yourself at home," he said mildly. "Hopefully this won't take too long."
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Apr 10, 2015 10:13 pm
The door opened, and Finn had only a bland, cold eye smile to give in return to the small one that greeted him. "Good to know." He stated, before making his way inside, gaze flitting around briefly, noting the absence of the telescope he and Ripley had bought for the other man. Yep. Something. Inwardly, he felt himself already beginning to seethe, though it was impossible to tell with such a perpetually chilly gaze just how Finn was ever feeling, though sometimes his tone gave hint to his irritation, especially to those who knew him well. Taking Chance's advice, Finn moved to sit on the edge of the bed, hands clasping in his lap as he then looked towards the other man. "Okay, talk. Though before you start, I'll warn you that this better be ******** good, and not a complete waste of my time."
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Apr 10, 2015 10:26 pm
The last time that Finn had been in his room, he had helped to set up the telescope. There had been laughter then, playful smirks, the banter between them easy and flowing like it always seemed to do. From the very beginning, Chance had felt comfortable with Finn; had felt like he could maybe manage to possibly understand what the word friend meant with not just him, but Ripley as well. The sharpness, the coldness, it was all something that Chance had grown used to, had learned to interpret, for the most part, as Finn just being...Finn.
Now, however, it was different, because Chance had screwed up and now he had to explain himself - and he realized, belatedly, that it was impossible, because it would mean admitting that he'd slept with Ripley. He wasn't entirely sure that Finn would enjoy hearing that, in spite of the open relationship that they had, and in spite of the fact that Chance had, in fact, slept with Finn as well.
I've really, definitely, ******** up.
"I, ah..." Chance started, and then stopped, because, for the first time, a wave of uncertainty seemed to slip over him. His words halted, and he blinked in surprise, rapidly so that his lashes seemed to blur together. This was harder than he'd thought it would be, more confusing than he'd intended.
Chance turned away, putting both hands on the back of his chair and leaning against it.
"Gimme...a sec," he mumbled, strangely out of sorts.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Apr 10, 2015 10:35 pm
Finn's gaze remained steady, unwavering even while Chance seemed to struggle to find the words he, presumably, intended to speak. Why invite Finn over for a talk if he didn't have anything to say, after all? His face was set, unsmiling, with not even a hint of his usual smirk on his lips. "Are you serious?" He asked, an eyebrow raising as the other man turned away from him. How ******** bad could this be, that Chance, the guy who he thought gave as few ******** as Finn did himself, couldn't just spit it out. <******** sakes. Man the ******** up, Bones. If you've got something to say to me, than say it. I promise, I can take it."
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Apr 11, 2015 2:09 pm
He winced, mostly because he knew he was being rather obtuse about it, and it was so uncharacteristic of his own personality that Chance felt annoyed at himself for even being this awkward. It wasn't supposed to be this difficult.
"Look," said Chance finally, twisting around, his hands moving at strange angles and gestures, clearly just trying to do something with his fingers, and he was resolutely not looking at Finn.
"I like you," he blurted out, and then rolled his eyes, a groan escaping past his lips. "Not - ********, not that way, you know I don't roll that way, that came out wrong. I mean, I like you as a person. As a...friend. You're one of the few people on this island that I think I could stand to be around for long periods of time, and I just - me avoiding you, I was trying to avoid the fact that I ******** up."
The words tumbled out of him faster than he'd intended, still lacking a great deal of emotion, but they had feeling, in their own way. Chance ran a hand through his curls.
"I ******** up," he repeated. "And I didn't want to screw things up between you and Ripley, or you and me or anything."
He'd said too much, unintentionally. Chance clamped his mouth shut.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Apr 11, 2015 3:29 pm
Ah, finally they were getting somewhere! Except that what Chance had to say was mighty confusing. Cue a long, narrow eyed stare. "Are you pregnant?"
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Apr 11, 2015 3:32 pm
"Yes, and you're the daddy," Chance deadpanned. "I was thinking Ella for a girl and Peter for a boy, what do you think?"
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Apr 11, 2015 3:38 pm
He didn't actually think Chance was pregnant. Really, he was just giving himself time to think. What the ******** could the other man mean? Besides the small, week long hiccup in his arrangement with Ripley, everything seemed to be going just fine. Six weeks of make up sex seemed to indicate things were more than fine, really. "You're going to have to ******** elaborate, I think. And not on the imaginary zombie baby names, dipshit. How, exactly, is my relationship with Ripley suddenly in jeopardy?"
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Apr 11, 2015 3:52 pm
He winced, and the truth was going to come out sooner or later, so it might as well have been sooner. Chance was never a liar, and he had never seen the point in hiding things anyway. The only reason he was hesitant now was because he knew about the arrangement between the two of them, knew it was a don't ask, don't tell kind of thing.
Chance slowly turned around and leaned against his desk, hands curling around the edges of it. His head was dipped a little to the side, hair obscuring the majority of his face from Finn's view.
"I slept with Ripley," he said finally, closing his eyes briefly; and being a normal human being was strangely hard. It felt peculiar to even talk like this, to discuss things. "A few weeks ago, back before the mission to the school. It was kind of...I didn't expect it to happen, it just sorta did."
Chance shook his head, just once, shifting his feet. "And I don't do regrets, but I figured I had ******** things up enough, I didn't want to ******** things up between you two, because I feel, I don't know, I like talking to you both, I like having you as my Moon partner, I like that you two are what you are; but I don't do strings attached for a reason, because I don't like messes or getting stuck in things, and I figured...distancing myself would be the best way to leave you guys to your own thing."
One hand lifted and fell in a sort of floppy gesture before falling to his side. The beginnings of a headache had started to form between his eyes, and he half expected a punch to the face; and definitely expected some anger, maybe even a stalking out from Finn.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Apr 11, 2015 10:55 pm
Finn had an inkling that he knew where this is headed, though he felt he really needed to hear it said first, that he required that verbal confirmation so that the could lay the thought to rest. He watched Chance carefully as the other man turned, and waited to hear what the thought that he might hear. Ah yes, there it was. Finn continued to stare at him for a long moment, though now, it was his turn to wince, but only inwardly. Yes, he and Ripley had an open relationship, still did, actually, but it was just as Chance remembered it. Don't ask, don't tell. There was a reason for that particular rule. Privacy, for one, though jealousy ranked fairly high as well. But oddly, while having his suspicions confirmed did sting a little, the wound was quickly salved and soothed over an instant later, when Chance continued to explain. A few weeks ago. Likely when he and Ripley had been on the outs, anyways. Somehow, that made it mean even less to Finn, who should not have had any right to judge anyways, considering he had done the same once before. Only once, and never again, though the opportunity could have most assuredly arose, if he had wanted it to. But he hadn't. Why have mutton when you could have steak at home? Finn had posed that question to Jack once, and it held true even now. He was, for a lack of a better word, content. Quite content. Faintly, his lips flickered up into a cold, bland smile. "Things do just tend to happen, sometimes." He said, voice even, not angry, not upset, but definitely not cheerful either. He went back to silence for a moment while Chance talked, and talked some more, and... Okay, that was enough, really. Finn held up a hand, a gesture meant to indicate that the other man should be quiet, though perhaps he had been finished anyways. "You don't do regrets, and yet, your behavior thus far says quite the opposite. Obviously, you feel guilty, but for what I can't even ******** fathom, because as far as I can see, you didn't do anything wrong. But, I guess you feel as if you did, somehow. For some ******** reason, you feel as if by having sex with the same man that I happen to have sex with regularly, makes you....what? A terrible person? A liar? A cheater? Or is it just that you wanted it to be something more then it was? You know...." Finn's smile widened slightly, but the coldness remained. "For somebody who claims to not feel, you seem to feel an awful lot. Like, for example, you seem to feel to know what is best for me, or for Ripley, and our "relationship". Why? Because you ******** us both?" Finn barked out a laugh, giving his head a small shake, fingers running through his hair as he continued to chuckle, as if he found all of this just very, incredibly, amusing. And he did. Of course he did. There was absolutely nothing here for him to be angry about. Well, except for the fact that Chance appeared to be, in this case, behaving like a complete idiot. "No strings attached." He finally said. "As far as I'm concerned, between us, there are none. As far as your little... thing, with Ripley, there are none." Because Ripley was Finn's, and he knew that, and was, in fact, willing to place a hefty bet on it. "Any ******** strings that you feel like you've become entangled in, they are your own. These are your hang ups. If you feel like things are too messy and you don't want involvement, fine, cut the strings, push me away, I could honestly give a s**t. I mean, the simpler solution would have been to just not do it again. There is always the option of just saying no, you dumb s**t." God, but Finn wanted a cigarette at that moment. Preferably combined with a nice stiff shot of whiskey. "Unless, of course, we go back to what I said before. The problem is just that you want what you can't have. You seem so insistent that you having anything to do with me or Ripley now will ruin what me and Ripley have...you still harboring a hard on for him that you can't possibly keep contained inside your pants? Are you convinced that your d**k is so magical that it will lure him away from me?" Finn laughed again. "Well, from what I remember, it isn't." kuuropii yes this is why I needed a computer to post. so that finn could let the full force of his dicktitude out. /sighs and puts head in hands
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Apr 12, 2015 8:04 pm
He was waiting for the inevitable, but when it didn't come at first, he thought maybe he had been mistaken; that all of his time spent with Finn and Ripley, both together and separate, had been just his own unwarranted observations, in spite of the discussions that he'd had with the both of them. He chanced a glance at the other man; at the cold, sharp-eyed expression he'd grown so used to seeing.
But then there it was - and Chance felt the weight of the words sinking into him. The words were what he had expected, and yet they felt strangely stronger, spoken aloud, and in the tone of voice that Finn was using. The laughter was received with a wince, Chance's grip on his desk tightening, fingers curling around the edge of it.
"That's not ******** it," he said finally, the words feeling disjointed in his throat. "I'm not ******** in love with either of you, that's not what I was - that's not what I'm saying."
Chance pushed himself back upright and began pacing back and forth, and the headache was getting worse; he pinched the bridge of his nose between two fingers, wondering why this was as hard as it was, wondering why he was even bothering when normally he would have just walked away without a second thought.
"I didn't want you guys to hate me."
The truth came out unexpectedly, and for the first time in a very long time, the faintest hint of red came across Chance's cheeks. He looked over at Finn, briefly, pressing his lips together.
"Look, I like sex; and I liked sleeping with you, and I liked sleeping with Ripley, because, let's face it, both of you are greatly talented in that area of your expertise. But I'm not - this whole concept of being friends with someone, it's ******** new to me, I'm not used to it, I don't know how it works."
Frustration was welling in him, the same as it had when Claude had yelled at him. "People keep expecting me to be on the same level as them when it comes to understanding this sort of s**t, and I just, I don't ******** know, I don't get how friendships work, all I know is that I didn't want you guys to hate me, or dislike me, that's all it is."
He hadn't talked this much or this passionately in years, if ever at all. Chance found that he was almost out of breath, his chest feeling tight as he slowed his pacing and finally came to a stop back at his desk, this time leaning with his hands on the back of his chair.
"So, I'm ******** inexperienced when it comes to this s**t, I don't know how to handle it, so I was just going to walk away, like I always do," he muttered, rubbing at his brow.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Apr 13, 2015 8:42 pm
Finn was beginning to feel slightly exasperated. No, more than slightly, though nothing in his chilly stare seemed to change, and his tone still remained, well, somewhat even. "Why, the ********>, would either of us hate you? You knew the rules. I told you them myself. I thought that you understood." He pursed his lips for a time then, and let Chance ramble on about what was eating away at him, before stepping in again.
"Look, if you can't handle having sex with friends, then I'll make it easier for you. What we did, it won't be happening again. Ever. Feel any better yet? Now, tell me, because I am still just a little bit confused, why is it that you had no problem still being "friends" after sleeping with me, but not after you slept with Ripley? What changed?"
He was genuinely curious, because something still didn't quite add up.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Apr 14, 2015 5:09 pm
Finn was given a mildly suspicious look, Chance not quite sure whether the other man was attempting to insinuate something, or if he genuinely just didn't understand the reasoning behind Chance's attempts at distancing himself.
(He did feel marginally better about the not happening again part however, even if Finn had been very good in bed.)
"Because I didn't know about the two of you when we slept together," said Chance slowly. "Because I saw how you were when we were in the infirmary that one time, after the horseman attacked us. Because when we talked in the hallway, and all the times after that I spent with you two, I could tell that you felt deeper for him than you'd admit, and I thought that, even with the arrangement you guys had, that if I slept with him that you'd be angry with me."
His fingers flexed and unflexed on the desk, and he felt rather peculiarly off kilter.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Reply
