The letter itself was in a plain envelope of the sort used by the facility when tasks warranted use of an off-island mail service and the paper within had been scented with the oils that Lawrence generally wore. The writing was unmistakably his, signed at the bottom with his signature he had perfected for Jan, curled in the corner was a neat sketch of a sleeping fox.

It was slid under Horace's door in the hours he was on duty during the day.

It read as follows.

Quote:


My Dearest Horace,

How are you? I sincerely hope that your wounds have mended well, they should look most handsome when they do, I appreciate a bit of imperfection in those I love. It is bound up in the very nature of humanity is it not? You will have endured, I know this, for you did not shy from the purification that you were set against. We were interrupted but I would have burned the weakness out of you, made you perfect in my eyes. You wished to be greater than America, I wished to give that to you, that we might have gone forward with equality, together as partners. Long is the way and hard, that out of Hell leads up to light and long this path looks set to be. It might well have been shorter but America of course, interfered with everything in that way she so stubbornly does, but if you let her set you against me, she will once more have taken you from me, toyed with my mind and my feelings.

I told you I could not love you Horace, and that much is true, I can not love you at present because I do not understand how. But I felt once you were entirely mine, once you had been set to the test of loyalty that I might have learned. You would have been my tutor as I was yours. There is much within me that is cold and hard, but I am after all, still human. I asked that you illumine what in me is dark, bring out what there is of kindness and affection below the surface.

And oh, how neglectful of me. You are likely wondering where I am? No doubt longing to be touched by me the way I long to once again be touched by you. That, I am afraid I am not privy to say, the punishments in this place are so very tedious and a great hindrance upon me. It is suffice to say that I see you, I read your words on twitter and sometimes in brief public places I get to look upon you, silenced by the nature of my confines. I miss you deeply, and I regret that you suffer as you no doubt do without my emotional guidance and without being able to return it in kind.

I can write, this is established, any correspondence that you wish to reach me may be lodged with my niece Chantelle who is able to carry letters on my behalf to and from you. You must not pressure her to visit me, any steps towards seeking me out might end in my permanent termination. Be strong, and know that Chantelle also has my utmost confidence, she will not betray us.

I sorely regret that our transcendental steps towards love were hindered by those who are so wholly incapable of understanding the intense connection that lies between us both and hope to be with you again soon enough.

All my fondness and enduring attachment,

Jan