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 Posted: Mon Oct 20, 2014 6:21 pm
Who: Anastacia and Cruz
When: Just after the end of the summer beach party; early evening
Where: One of Isle de Gambino's beaches
Weather: Warm; the sun is setting and the ocean breeze keeps things comfortable
She was by herself now. Revon had departed the festivities not too long ago and Zeke was off doing Zeke things - namely helping to dismantle booths and fold up tables and whatever else he could stick his nose into. Anastacia didn't mind too much. It was nice to be free of the hubbub, even though she had acclimated to it surprisingly well over the course of the afternoon.
With an hour or two now free - Zeke's assurance, when the veterinarian had tracked her down to tell her of his plan - the spider queen had taken to combing the beach for shells, sea glass, and stones that were both smooth and pretty to her eyes. It had been a long while since she had gotten to do such a thing and her collection was overdue for some new pieces to showcase. She also found the task relaxing, which was just the ticket after a long day on this very beach with the Aurora Frei. Here and there she paused her forward motion to stoop and scoop a something from the wet sand before the surf reclaimed it. If the capture was successful the Raevan femme would scrutinize her prize and either tuck it safely in her bag or let it drop back into the foam from whence it had come. At the moment Anya's bag was still light, but there would be plenty of time to make its bottom sag beneath the weight of so many new trinkets. After all, the sun was still up and as long as the light was there, so too would she be.
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Posted: Mon Oct 27, 2014 12:04 pm
After sending Justin's dead DS into the sea, Cruz returned to his guardian and Tango. Many of the others came and went in disjointed spurts, Duncan, Damien, and Mordekai all doing their own thing while Anita did hers. The frei mingled some, said hellos, but the fact Ethiriel had to leave so abruptly made him feel a little melancholy. Still, it was nice to see her.
Things were beginning to wrap up. The sky was bursting with vibrant oranges and pinks that cast along the water in a constantly changing symphony of light. Cruz idled to watch the sunset while the humans began packing up. There were a few other raevans floating about, he noticed, but only one caught his attention and set the croc on edge.
Uncertainty blossomed inside him and he looked around for any sign of Zeke. The colors were different from the last time he saw the man but that hair was unmistakeable; he was off in the distance, taking things down and cleaning up. With the man at least present, Cruz managed to settle his heart -- a little. The last time he saw either of them up close was in the helicopter. If they were here, that meant they must be doing better. Anya certainly appeared to be in a better state than the huddled wide-eyed mass of whispers on the floor she once was.
Hesitantly, Cruz gathered the courage to approach. It was an arduously slow trip, one he made with his ribbon so low against the ground the end made a trail through the sand. Once he was within a yard or so he stopped completely, leaving the spider frei with plenty of room to spare.
"Ah..." he started quietly, wringing his hands, "Ana?"
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Posted: Mon Oct 27, 2014 1:16 pm
A small scallop shell was plucked on the wet-dry line; its drying form largely undamaged, save for some chipping around the ridged top edge. Anya pocketed it without a second thought.
She was slow to move from the spot now, bountiful in riches as it was. Sea glass, shells, and stones all seemed to flock here even if most were of unsatisfactory condition for the Widow's tastes. Unfortunately with that bounty came a disgusting amount of seaweed, so the femme was forced to subject herself to its slimy tendrils more often than not. Crouching low - her ribbon in one hand to prevent any seaweed from becoming entangled in its sharp spines and slender webs - the Frei pulled a small wad of the green stuff out of the water and haphazardly threw it back into the water. It floated where it landed, teasing her with the thought that it would be coming back in on the next roll of waves. With a new spot now briefly uncovered, Anastacia set her sights on the sand beneath the clear water. A white stone was there and she stuck her hand down to snag it. She rose into the air as her fingers encircled sand and whatever else lay within, feeling confident she had not missed her prize.
"Ah...Ana?"
The sudden voice from behind startled her. The Frei snapped her wings shut with a chitinous clatter, her back straightening and her fingers curling into balls reflexively. From her right hand, wet sand plopped into the water in thick, wet drops. Anya's heart raced into her throat and alarm sent her crown scuttling around her face. It took her a moment to compose herself enough to make the slow turn to see the one who had spoken, but memory told her who it was before her eyes did.
Oh no.
Her gaze set upon his green visage and memories came pouring back in. Not of their first encounter so long ago, but of a second that had occurred when she had been at her most low. Her brows furrowed as she looked at him, wondering if what she was remembering was actually true. He had been in the helicopter, crouched with his chest against the floor in front of her. She could picture his lips moving, and a look on his face that had been what? Worry? Nervousness? Fear?
The look there now was strictly the first and middle options. In the past she would have hissed at him to go away and taken off from the spot due to the circumstances of their initial meeting. Now she found herself rooted, staring back at the Mistletoe Frei with her lips pressed tight and every nerve in her body trembling as sand dried against the fingers of one hand and her ribbon remained held in the other.
"Cruz," she began, unsure of just what to say to him from there. His name came out slowly and softly - identifying him to the world although they were the only two in the vicinity to hear it. All the same, saying the Croc's name was enough to unfreeze Anastacia. She shifted uncomfortably, her crown's legs pumping once and then twice before settling rigidly spread around her face. She gave her head a shake to clear it somewhat - an action taken in vain, truthfully - but despite some part of her telling her to, she did not run from him. Questions pressed too hard for her to do that and a little bit of shock from seeing him so suddenly out of the blue helped too.
"What...?"
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Posted: Mon Oct 27, 2014 1:57 pm
As soon as her name fell from his mouth, Cruz recoiled and gave the black widow a wider berth. He saw that flinch, how every part of her tensed, and he couldn't tell if it was because of him or if anyone would have elicited the same reaction from her. The croc prostrated himself further, holding his hands palm out in an attempt at showing peace.
Both freis stared at each other with growing apprehension. The longer the silence drew on, the more Cruz felt a flurry of emotions; nervousness and fear decidedly among them, but worry crept back in and doubt took a strong hold of him. The way his name slipped between her lips managed to put him at ease. It wasn't said with any fondness, no, but the familiarity was noted and a distinct lack of anger on her part was much appreciated. All the same, he floated no higher and dared not move closer. Instead, he tried to smile. It was small, feeble, understated, but it was there -- his olive branch.
"Hi," he offered weakly, fingers on one hand twitching in a meager wave. A brief silence followed as words escaped him. He felt his heart and expression sink but quickly tried to right them. "Um--" Despite his best efforts, Cruz's voice quivered. His smile dampened, then perked up as he tried to make up for his fumbling. "How-- are you? Are you... okay?" It was growing increasingly difficult for him to speak above a whisper, though he did his best to be heard over the sound of the surf.
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Posted: Mon Oct 27, 2014 2:44 pm
The Crocodile pulled back and it was then she noticed how far he was from her. His berth made her wonder but it also made her relax, if only a touch. This showed in the movement of her crown, the eight appendages suddenly curling inward toward her head although they still remained a little tense even then.
Cruz smiled at her then, though to call the pulling of the green Frei's lips a 'smile' was a stretch. It was a tiny thing, as if the bearer expected to be immolated for that, let alone any more. This puzzled her greatly and added questions to her already filled mind, but also brought the helicoptor scene to the forefront.
She had seemed out of it then - and for the most part that had been true, so absorbed in what had happened in the jungle and what she had done to react to outside stimuli - but Anya had still had her eyes opened. She had seen whatever had been in her vision. For the most part this had been the floor of the helicopter, but for a duration of time Cruz apparently had been there. Looking at the fumbling younger Raevan now, the confusion there settled and certainty remained. He had been there. But now the question was why?
In their first meeting the Crocodile had kissed her. In return, Anastacia had reacted as she had felt was right in that moment, namely forcing the then-newborn back from herself and fleeing to a high corner of the room. From that point on she had hated him to the very core of her being - how dare he, after all?! - and yet there he had been and now here he was, like a puppy who had been kicked but still wanted to be petted by the one who had put the boot to it.
"Hello," she returned, her word falling out flat and automatic with no thought put in while her head inclined with a brief lift of her chin. She did not return his wave, her hands far too occupied to do so. It seemed that Cruz had his own bevvy of questions storming his thoughts and tripping his tongue. He uttered two of them but his voice was almost too quiet to hear.
"I'm...fine." She supposed she was. This sudden conversation was putting her at odds with that statement, but for the most part that four letter word was appropriate. "And yes, I suppose I am."
She had come a long way since the helicopter ride a year ago. Anya wasn't sure how to list herself on a scale if asked, but even she could see she was better off than she had been this time last year. The Widow was out and about - even if there was still some trepidation about that sometimes - and she was creating and doing and being again.
But Cruz wouldn't know about that or what she had gone through to get here today. The shock wearing off, she surveyed him quietly but not without some severity still. She had not forgotten their first meeting after all, and trust after that fact would not be so easily won. She had changed since the jungle, certainly, but she was not one hundred percent a new and different Anya.
After a short time, curiosity finally won out and the Virus Frei spoke again.
"Why do you ask?" Simply put and not stumbled over as Cruz's questions had been, but tentatively put all the same.
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Posted: Thu Oct 30, 2014 11:35 am
The movement of her wings, her crown, all of her individual digits spoke more volumes than any of her sparse words. Cruz kept his distance but he did not press further away now -- this seemed a comfortable distance for her. He lowered his hands.
All too well could he recall both events. The first thing he ever experienced of Anastacia was fear and loathing. That thought alone made it hard to carry a smile to her but it became even heavier with the constant thought of the scene on the helicopter. His head was spinning the whole way and she seemed so unaware, so troubled. So many were injured and all were shaken. Cruz could only imagine what any of them suffered through. What she suffered through.
Though the greeting was flat, the fact she chose to do so at all lifted a great weight from him. He dared not float any higher but the croc's shoulders raised some, along with his chin. She continued speaking and Cruz's green eyes glistened.
"Good," he breathed, hardly audible even to himself. Cruz smiled at the sand and let the silence surround them. He supposed that was enough-- but she asked more of him. "Ah--"
His clawed fingers ran over each other, tangling, wringing each other out. It took him a moment to look her in the eye but, when he managed, his smile was warm and far sturdier than the rest of him.
"Was wondering... Hoped you were good." That wasn't all, though. Sheepishly, he averted his gaze. "And..." his smile waned. Cruz's expression dipped from gentle relief back to worry but one corner of his mouth managed to stay upturned. "Wanted to say..." his heart was pounding, only made worse by dragging it out. For so long he wanted the chance to say this, to approach her in a calm environment and not repeat his mistake. Once he started, it all tumbled out. "Sorry... I'm sorry, Ana. Didn't mean to scare you. Glad you're fine."
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Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2014 1:49 pm
He averted his gaze more than once, flicking between her and the sand as he fumbled and tripped over his own tongue. Anya remained silent, watching and waiting for whatever it was that Cruz wanted to say. Clearly he had something on his mind - he would have departed after asking about her well-being and getting an answer, surely. On her side of the conversation it was curiosity that kept her there, that pressing sensation of uncertainty that needed to be sated before it allowed her to take off, lest she be kept awake tonight wondering.
It didn't take too long thereafter for him to come out with it. Once the first word came, the rest fell after it as though attached by a string.
"Oh," Her lavender eyes widened a touch in surprise at what she was hearing. She didn't have to ask what he was apologizing for. Suddenly the awkwardness in the air pressed in close and Anya felt as if her arms were too long, her wings held out too wide, and she shifted to fight the feeling. It didn't help much and now it was her turn to avert her gaze, casting all six of her eyes to the sand beneath her.
Anya wasn't sure what to say to that. Ever since it happened, hating Cruz for what he had done had been a sure thing; a lasting thing. But recent events had flipped her right around and where hate had once been now there was something else. The Widow couldn't put a name to it but it made her shoulders tense and the light of her rune flutter. Slowly she looked up again, her head moving up just enough so her four additional eyes could see the Croc.
She didn't know what to do.
What he had done had been...was there even a word? He had done the action and gotten away with it for so long and now here he was, looking as pitiful as could be and apologizing for it. Stranger still, he sounded sincere. Anya lifted her head more, bringing her gaze up and fixating it on Cruz again. Surprise still lingered but uncertainty had joined it in her eyes. She opened her mouth to speak and then closed it again. Her brows furrowed further.
"What you did...it was wrong." A knot had appeared inside her chest and the Frei raised a hand to ball over the spot, chewing on her tongue. "You know that, right?"
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Posted: Mon Jan 12, 2015 10:45 am
Cruz waited, floating low and submissive, with his hands clutching each other in a nearly white knuckled grip in spite of his sun kissed tan. Anastacia's initial response, that simple sound of surprise, made him float even lower. He looked like a balloon that was quickly losing its helium and, before long, his ribbon was starting to curl against the sand.
There was a long and tense silence. The croc felt his heart beat through every inch of him; from his fingertips to his temples and most certainly in his throat.
Cruz didn't want to stare at her but he did pass a glance now and then as she processed his apology. For the most part, he kept his head ducked and when he did meet her gaze it was like looking on a guilty pup. When she chose to speak again, the mistletoe frei held his hands to his chest. He nodded.
"Mhm," Cruz murmured timidly. He left his mouth open as he searched for more words, better words. "Very wrong. Never wanted to scare or hurt you, Ana. Or anyone..." The very idea made Cruz recoil and grimace. "That-- kissing--" he pointed to his own lips, "--it's food. I was hungry. Just wanted to eat, but--" Cruz shook his head, "I-I can't just do that. It's bad and wrong to not ask and to just take."
It was still difficult for Cruz to articulate, even with a more extended vocabulary. What he wanted here was not so much forgiveness as it was to put the spidery frei's mind at ease; he never meant to hurt her and he never do it again.
With a shaky breath, he straightened his shoulders but dared not float any higher -- not yet. "Won't happen again, Ana. Promise."
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Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2015 3:26 pm
His reply came quicker than her own, but his words were no less slowly posed as Cruz too fought for the right ones to say. She listened to each one, processed them, and with that they became several more buzzing around in her head as she struggled to grasp the overarching question therein.
He sounded sincere. He had floated down toward the sand until his ribbon had started to curl into a small pile of itself, straightening himself only when he vowed to never do it again.
"You've learned," she murmured then, her thoughts falling from her lips before she could stop them. The hand that had been curled to her chest was quickly raised and its fingers pressed there, Anya pinching her lavender eyes shut as though that would stop any others from coming loose. It worked, surprisingly, and when she opened her eyes again her thoughts were contained to her mind's echoing halls. But what do I do?
It had been so long since that day. So much had happened, especially in this last year. She had gone through so many changes; she was not the same Anya that she had been before the jungle, that she knew full well. She had told herself over and over for so long now that the past was past and it held no power over her. That had been in regards to the torment the jungle had left her with, but who was to say it couldn't extend farther? What good did it to her to hold onto this...anger, grudge, whatever it was now? She wasn't the same Anya anymore. Not one hundred percent.
But this was something that wasn't just tossed aside and forgotten, apology or no apology. It might not keep her up at night like the jungle had, but it had still been an offense.
What do I do?
She took a shuddering breath and held it for a moment before releasing. It came out less shaky than when it went in, her shoulders falling with the exhale. "You sound sincere. Are you really sincere?" There was a sensation of stiffness in her wings and she moved them to correct it, but did not near nor pull away from the Crocodile even so. She did not wait for him to reply either way. "You know I have every right to turn around right now and leave you here or to tell you to go away and never speak to me again. I could do that and it would be the end of this." She looked at the sand again but forced her gaze up to meet the Croc's green one. As soon as she started, the words came in a rush. "It'd be so easy, you know. But I can't help but wonder 'what good would that do?'. It was so long ago and I've dealt with things in recent times that have kept me up at night for longer than you can probably imagine. That time...was not among them."
She crossed her arms, squeezing her biceps in each hand.
"I don't know that I can forgive you and that everything will be sunshine and rainbows between us. This isn't...This isn't like a movie where people say 'sorry' and are instantly friends." She frowned, not liking that particular wording. "But it's also stupid to keep hold of something that is miniscule in comparison to what has happened. I can see that now."
In came another breath and out it went again with the motions of her shoulders. Her grip became a little tighter. If she was to fully and finally forgive herself for the jungle and the things that had happened there, perhaps she would have to forgive another for his own trespasses. That made sense. Somewhat. Anya did not stop to think on it. There was no turning back now and she would not run.
"So...If you really are sincere and you mean what you say...then I will accept your apology, Cruz."
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Posted: Thu Mar 26, 2015 1:26 pm
The silence between them as Anya processed his apology was almost deafening. Even the sound of the waves, not far off, grew quiet in the wake of his anticipation. If it was possible for him to be any more on alert, he did so with the soft sound of her voice.
Cruz stayed quiet; she needed to think.
When finally she addressed him again, the croc's eyes lit. He floated higher with his shoulders straight and opened his mouth-- only to close it promptly as Anastacia continued. Cruz kept his lips shut tight and his gaze unwaveringly on her. Even with how little they interacted, never had he heard her speak so much. The way she weaved her web of words put a tight grip on Cruz's heart. She was right: it would be easy to leave him here, she had every right to go away and never pay him any mind again, but something about that possibility put a fear in him and the more she spoke the more that fear became muddied.
By the time she said her piece, it wasn't quite relief Cruz felt but he was able to loosen his posture and not hold himself so stiffly. It took a moment for him to generate any sort of response, any acknowledgment other than maintaining steady eye contact. His brows knit but a small smile worked its way onto his face.
"Don't need to be my friend," he offered tentatively, first. That wasn't the point of this apology. "Unless you want to." The slight waver in his voice seemed hopeful.
There was a slight amount of fidgeting, clumsy fingers overlapping with one another as he wrung his hands. It still felt like there was more to say, a lot more, but only a small amount of it was finding its way to his lips. "Whatever you want to do, Ana. Just wanted you to know. I'm sorry and I learned." He was sincere, devastatingly so, but would it truly be enough for her to accept?
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Posted: Thu Apr 02, 2015 12:03 pm
She waited for his reply, feeling on edge. Would he understand what she just said? Was he old enough to? A frown crossed her face - small, but there - and caused a thin crease between her eyes. He had to be old enough, she wasn't that much older than him.
Finally Cruz did speak, his voice lilting with hope at first. Anya sighed, which wiped the frown away. She wasn't sure going into the future what their 'relationship' would be to one another, but right now the word 'friend' was not on the field. At least not so soon after she was prying loose her hold on a grudge that had fueled her dislike of the Crocodile for so many years. All the same, she remained silent on that front. Cruz had been quiet during her speech, it was only courteous that she offer him the same.
His words after that were few, but not for lack of trying. He was still young, that was apparent, and what he said was the best he could vocalize that he understood everything she had just spewed to him moment before. She could ask for more, but what would it get her? At the end of the day, even if he didn't say the magic word, his tone and what little words he did utter put it across well enough. She nodded.
Okay... She inhaled deeply enough that her shoulders rose, exhaling slowly and allowing herself to close her lavender eyes. There would be no harm here from him. He was prostrate; he was sincere. Now it was on her to uphold her end.
"Cruz," Anya reopened her eyes. The name was left to hang in the air for a moment before the Widow let her guard drop completely. She squeezed her upper arms once and let her arms fall to her sides, palms out on the way down. "I accept your apology."
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Posted: Thu Apr 02, 2015 12:25 pm
A weight left him, then, as well as his breath, and for a moment Cruz felt like he might float away; like he was suddenly rendered hollow from all his building tenseness and anxiety dissipating. Then, though he did rise closer to his usual height, he was weighed back down, grounded with the very tip of his ribbon touching the sand, by a different weight -- something kinder and a little soft but still heavy in its importance.
His green eyes lit, reflecting the first touches of dusk. A smile creased his lips, growing far but not the usual toothy grin he would give in earnest. The croc nearly forgot to blink, he was so caught up in the sudden well of admiration for Anastacia and, when his vision blurred, Cruz gave a small laugh despite himself. He rubbed his eyes with the back of his hand.
"Thank you, Ana," he said, voice a little shaken but no less sincere.
The urge was strong to keep telling her it wouldn't happen again, that she needn't worry, but Cruz caught himself. Already he had lingered so long in her presence, longer than ever before, and even though his cards were all out on the table and she was being receptive the fact of the matter was that he had still scared and upset her, once upon a time.
He cleared his throat. His smile softened as he closed his lips and took a deep breath to make himself steady. "I can go," Cruz offered. The mistletoe frei rubbed his arms. "If you want. Don't mean to bother."
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Posted: Thu Apr 02, 2015 1:23 pm
And there it was, all at once. Like water when the sink stopper is pulled out, the sensation of something liquid and strangely gritty drained from her body. She could have gasped, perhaps even looked to the sand to see if the patch beneath her was somehow wet, but in its wake the feeling left her with a new one that prevented all that - exhaustion.
Anya had never felt so tired before, not in recent memory. Suddenly she wanted to sink to the ground and curl up there, close her eyes, and sleep for countless days. Her form reflected this. Her shoulders slumped and her wings fell from their lofted height to dip their tips into the sand below. Her features slackened as stress, hurt, anger, and everything else melted away altogether. Even her crown was not immune, the legs falling limp and hanging along the side of her head and dangerously over her brow.
"You're welcome." The words were breathed more than spoken, gaze still on the Crocodile although it threatened to waver now more than ever with a closer blur than ever before. Eventually it did, her eyes rolling toward the ocean before back over and farther still toward the sand that sloped upward and hid the parking lot beyond it. The time had not changed. This conversation had not been many hours, but a handful of minutes. Why then, did it feel like it had taken years?
"I think that would be best. I'm..." So very tired... Her thoughts spoke one statement but her mouth formed others. Her words were heavy on her tongue. "I think Zeke will be looking for me. It's late."
She turned bodily now, her movements slow to the naked eye, and inside Anya felt as if she was trying to float through cement. She tried so hard not to blink. Each closing of her eyes felt harder to free herself of than the last. But despite the very real threat of Zeke finding her asleep on the sand if she continued to linger, Anya still gave pause only a few feet away to look back at Cruz one last time over her left shoulder.
"Your Guardian might be looking for you too."
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