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 Posted: Sun Oct 12, 2014 6:35 pm
The first memory, the very first that trickled in her mind stunned and shocked and scared her. Mintaka had been enjoying her nightly 'tea' patrol, sipping it with not a care in the world when she went from her peaceful rooftop to a pile of rubble in the arms of someone she had never thought she would be in the arms of.
They had vowed love, through out time. They had vowed marriage, just them two. In a world torn asunder, carnage and rubble. She 'saw' white long hair, her own, a fuku that matched hers but more intricate and fluffy small white wings.
She saw him, tall and handsome and more mature. The negaverse uniform, militaristic and ranked him of a captain.
It was like looking into a TV as the scene played out before her. The words carrying out, but they didn't make sense to her. The hallucination, the dream...the memory ended when her hand shook and she dropped one of her finest teacups into the rooftop.
What had she seen? What had been shown to her?
Was she going crazy? She needed to ask someone, anyone. She left her tea set up, the broken glass with a pressing rush to understand, to find what it meant. And the biggest question of all....Why was she vowing her love to Aurostibite, of the negaverse?
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Posted: Sun Oct 12, 2014 6:53 pm
It was a ridiculous memory.
For the better part of a week, Magiore Carpenter had sat in his loft, all the curtains drawn, all the windows closed and all the lights off. Several empty bottles of various types of alcohol sat on the glass-topped table in his living room, and Magiore himself was slouched on the couch with his feet up on the surface, a half-drunk glass of amber liquid dangling from his fingertips.
He wasn't drunk, but he sure as hell wished he was, because then he could blame the memory inside of his head on just a drunken hallucination.
It would do no good to sit around any longer, mulling about things that did not and could not exist. He would get out, go on patrol, and forget about what he'd seen inside of his head, forget about all of it except for his duties because that was the most important thing.
Standing, he set the glass on the table and stretched, twisting his body around in an effort to work out some of the kinks. Within a few seconds, he'd slipped from the room and, a moment later, was on the rooftop of his apartment building, tugging the brim of Lieutenant Aurostibite's hat low on his head.
And another moment later, he was on a second rooftop, and then a third, merely zipping quietly and quickly from place to place, trying to sort through the mess inside of his mind.
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Posted: Sun Oct 12, 2014 7:09 pm
She should've paid closer attention to just where she was venturing, but her mind was still trying to sort, as much as her 18 year old mind could, what she had seen. Was she being shown something? Was she being tricked?
Was this just one more dream inside dreams? But she had been awake, and it felt so real, and the love had flowed from the scene into her and it scared her because she couldn't and wouldn't ever ask for something like that.
She valued her attempts of neutrality with chaos, valued that she was becoming someone accustomed to peace that she was designing into her own morals.
And yet, in that moment, that Mintaka had wanted to throw everything away to be with a Captain of Chaos, and she just couldn't process it. It was all to terribly confusing. through her haze, she felt the tinge of the negaverse. Her footsteps became light on the roof, until, like the vision, she was stunned into stillness as more emotion ragged and unwelcome poured through her.
Who else could cause that besides the very one she had her 'memory' about?
"Aurostibite..." She whispered his name, as she looked into his eyes. His hair was much shorter, he wasn't a captain, he didn't have the same maturity. She was just a girl, not beautiful and grown and lady like. Her instinct told her to turn tail and run again, run away.
Her curiosity wondered if he saw anything like she did....
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Posted: Sun Oct 12, 2014 9:44 pm
He felt the power signature ripple through the air, and it shouldn't have been familiar, but it was and that was even more confusing. Aurostibite's steps skidded to a sudden halt as the pale haired figure came into view in front of him, his boots sliding on the uneven rooftop of a long vacated office building.
They were only a few feet away from each other, but he kept the distance as much as he could. There was a strange desire to move closer, to reach out and see if she was some figment of his hallucinations, but a stronger desire to hold back, to deny what he'd seen, what he'd felt, made him stay where he was. A look of anger passed across Aurostibite's face, though whether it was anger at her or anger at himself remained to be seen.
"Lieutenant," he corrected her flatly, his tone deep and even. "My name is Lieutenant Aurostibite."
Because he wasn't a Captain, because after three years of being in the Negaverse, he still had yet to prove himself to being anything more than what he was, and Mintaka knew that, because he'd told her that the last time he'd met her - the first time he'd met her, however many months ago it had been now.
He remembered the paper cranes and grew annoyed again.
"I don't wish to see you," Aurostibite said brusquely, and it was both the truth and a lie, and yet he still didn't turn or leave, his gloved hands slowly clenching and unclenching at his sides.
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Posted: Mon Oct 13, 2014 6:39 pm
She was pretty sure she was holding her breath, holding it all inside. His brisk comment, his stand offish demeanor. She should've been used to it. After all, he had barely wanted to talk to her when she had exchanged their paper cranes.
Funny that both of them would've ended up together. If that's what happened. Fate? She wondered. Her breath escaped at his correction.
"It's Aurostibite..." She murmured, "No matter what rank. Lieutenant now, Captain later." Her chin lifted and tilted.
"Why?" She blurted out before trying to draw herself in, "I didn't know that my company was so detestable..."
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Posted: Mon Oct 13, 2014 7:12 pm
The memories were like a long-forgotten dream; fragments here and there, some stronger than others, some quieter, but not lost entirely. Aurostibite could still almost physically feel the touch of her hand in his, the way she had leaned against him, kissed him fiercely, desperate for love and attention and he had kissed her back with just as much desperation.
It made him sick. It made him confused. It made him ache inside, painful and hollow, as though he was missing something, but he couldn't think about that, not when he felt as though he was two separate people fighting to get out. The side of him that stuck rigidly with the Negaverse ideals and the side of him that wanted to explore the memories he didn't know he'd had.
"Captain." He spat out the word as though it tasted bad, and maybe it did. "I am not...a Captain. As you are fully aware of."
Hot shame welled over him. Aurostibite slanted his face away from hers, not wanting to look at those eyes that he thought he might drown in if he stared for too long. His mind twisted and contorted, thoughts going this way and that, and nothing made sense anymore.
"Because," he said, and he'd started controlling his voice better now. It was quiet, simple, lacking emotion, but not as harsh as it had been before. There was a long pause in which he contemplated the rest of his sentence, Aurostibite holding himself stiffly.
"...I don't know why," he muttered finally, after a moment. "But it seems a bad idea. We are not of the same mindset, after all."
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Posted: Mon Oct 13, 2014 7:40 pm
She wouldn't pretend she couldn't see them too, those figments, the glimpses. The love. Fai...Mintaka, future, she had so much to give. It was there inside her, and she hated it. She hated it because she wanted to know more about it, know more about her.
"But you will be." She added, "One day, you will be." And one day she would be a eternal senshi, and one day, maybe they would-But she stopped herself from those thoughts.
She looked away too, because she knew that he felt shamed and because she wanted to reach out, wrap her arms around him and hug him. Hold him. Anything to comfort him.
"You're right." Her voice littled, growing small. Her hand came up to hold her arm. Turning herself defensively. "Aurostibite..." She held her breath...
"Do you...have you..." She paused..."Do you see it..." Her hand tightened around her arm, "Do you see what it was?"
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Posted: Mon Oct 13, 2014 8:59 pm
This whole confusing mess was part of the reason why he hadn't wanted to see Mintaka in person; because that just made it worse, made the desire to reach out and hold her even worse because he didn't know her. They had met only once before, and that had not been nearly enough time to actually achieve a relationship, even if it was a negative one. The memories between them could not have been real, he couldn't let them be real just because they felt real.
"Perhaps," said Aurostibite. "Perhaps." But he let the subject of his promotion drop because talking about it irritated him.
She still wasn't calling him Lieutenant and that made it harder in and of itself. He flinched a little, unconsciously, taking a step back away from her so that he could collect his thoughts properly. But she was asking him about the memories, the memories he'd wondered if she had seen too, and now that he knew, it was worse all over again.
"...I saw," he said, after a long moment, teeth clenched together. "I saw...us. Together."
It was painful. The ache in his chest increased.
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Posted: Tue Oct 14, 2014 10:45 am
It was hard to think that a five year future of events that lasted a couple of months was trickling through her mind here and there. She would catch glimspes, sometimes straight scenes. Not all of them of Aurostibite. Sometimes she would see a fuzzy figure, someone masked in her mind. No doubt it was his identity. But she didn't want to spook him anymore.
They had only known each other...through one meeting. How terribly confusing it was to see images of them after five years. Of what could be, if she pursued it. Of what could be now, if she pushed. Or what would scare him away if she tried.
"I see." She ran her hand back up her arm again, still looking away. But he had seen it, and there was no way to unsee it. It was either be pushed away, or attempt to relive a future that never happened. her heart was beating immensely fast.
"That...I..." She faltered, sighing. "That is what I saw too, does it bother you?" Will you think of her? "Will you avoid me for the choices...we haven't made yet? Because I can tell you know, I will stubbornly still try to be friends with you. Even if you don't want me too..." She didn't want that. In that glimpse of her memory, they had been happy, truly happy.
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Posted: Wed Oct 15, 2014 9:18 am
The memories were between the two of them, which meant that they had existed at some point, even if it had been in a world that had not yet come to pass, even if it had been in a world that would never come to pass, in an entirely different universe. The feel of her hair against his face, the warmth of her lips as they pressed against his own, the gentleness of her fingers as they slid against the palm of his hand; these memories felt as real as the memories that were real, like having gotten up that morning and made breakfast and donned his Negaverse persona.
It made his head spin dizzily, because there was no explanation for it, and yet here they both were.
He didn't love her; Aurostibite knew that much, at the very least, because he hardly knew the woman standing in front of him, and he could not love someone he did not know. But the ache in his heart was genuine, and it burned through him like a fire that couldn't be stopped.
"Those - those choices are not set in stone," he said flatly, almost a denial, but not quite. "The future is not something that is so easily carved and unchangeable. What I - what we saw - that is not something that may even come to pass."
Aurostibite took a breath, clenching both his teeth and his fists together. He wanted to run, he wanted to stay, he wanted to gather her up in his arms, he wanted to push her away in disgust he didn't know what he wanted. This wasn't supposed to have happened; Mintaka was supposed to have just been an acquaintance from the wrong side, someone he thought of as naive and foolish (he still did, but now that was tainted by something far more soft and gentle).
"...our lives are different," he said quietly, looking away from her. "You can try to be friends with me if you'd like, but your mind and my mind," and our hearts "are two entirely separate things. Those memories are not real. I am not that man."
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Posted: Wed Oct 15, 2014 10:07 am
She told herself she would need time to sort this out, time to figure this out.
Another memory surged through her, causing her knee's to fail, and drop her to the ground.
She saw them again, back in the rubble. She was crying softly, he was holding her. This was so unfair. This was so cruel to show her these things when she was too young, too young in their lives to even be thinking of these things.
And she could hear her voice, repeating the words in her head.
I promise that I will wait for you in the cauldron and I'll find you again when I'm reborn over and over and over again, I'll always find you be..because I will never be with anyone but you...
She quiet as stupid hot tears filled up her eyes. she told herself she wouldn't cry, even if she saw Chariklo after the woman had been killed in the future, or she would find Amytis and hold her so close so the future of tar wouldn't be there.
She told herself tears were a sign of weakness, but she couldn't help the small sniffle. It was so unfair to feel that deep ache and love and have it there as a memory inside of her.
"Y...you are right." She said shakily, pushing herself up again and wiping the tears away. "And I am not that woman. We are not those people. We are not that future." Even through space and time and the cauldron, she would find him. He was here standing in front of her and she didn't know what to do.
"I should go, you should go." she laughed awkwardly, "Maybe next time...we can just talk...about normal things..." She wanted to run away, but she couldn't, so she stood there and waited for him to leave first. It'd be so much easier if he just left first.
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Posted: Wed Oct 15, 2014 10:20 am
A soft sound made him lift his head, and a jolt ran through him; Mintaka was kneeling on the ground, looking terribly small and fragile, and Aurostibite reigned in the very strong impulse to run over to her, to gather her in his arms and tell her that everything would be all right.
(It wouldn't. It couldn't. This was a mistake.
This was not a mistake.)
She wasn't exactly crying, but the expression on her face was hard enough to bear as it was. Aurostibite stood stock still where he was, feeling frozen in place, as though he couldn't have moved even if he'd wanted to. Her voice cut into him, painful and trembling, and the laugh that escaped her lips was even harder to listen to, because it was bitter and sad and filled with a longing he didn't understand.
You promised me.
"Wait."
He'd said it without intending to, the word hanging in the air between them like a knife. For several moments Aurostibite just stood there, staring at her from his position on the rooftop, and the wind tousled his hair, a few stray strands brushing across his cheeks.
"...Maybe," he said, and his voice was quiet. "Maybe...we should talk...now."
He didn't know why he had said it; all he did know was that he thought he might regret it if he let her walk away.nyxtsuki moon FEELINGSSS lies on ground
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Posted: Wed Oct 15, 2014 10:45 am
She continued to wipe the tears away, with the back of her hand. She was suppose to be a lady, someone of breeding who could handle anything thrown her way with poise and grace.
Calm and calculating and thoughtful. That was what a lady was suppose to do. Yet she couldn't sort the feelings of one person inside her, when another was there too.
That singular word of wait made her heart pound, ignite some kind of hope inside her. And she watched him carefully, because the quietness was like an unspoken train of thoughts and feelings. She couldn't leave now, didn't he see?
She desperately wanted to touch his face, and see if it was like in her memories. Soft but hard and defined. A warrior, and a solider. That's what he was. A loyal solider.
"I...." She pursued her lips again, because it was like asking for trouble, asking for something they already almost agreed couldn't and wouldn't be. But..
But...
"I would like that." She didn't quite smile, but she did take a step closer to him, just one. "Do...Have you read any books..." It felt terrible to ask him something she already was sure her future self knew. He liked to read, how often had her future self caught him reading quietly. Contemplating silently. How her future self would just watch him from the corner of her eye and love so deep because that was her man...
Talk about normal things? She was naive to think they'd be normal after the memories.
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Posted: Fri Oct 17, 2014 8:49 pm
He wasn't sure what he was supposed to do about her crying. The half of him that was not aching with loss was irritated that she was crying over this, because this should not even have been a problem. They were not together, like in their weird shared memories. They were not in love. If anything, their relationship was nothing more than a Negaverse agent and a Senshi on opposite sides of a long-standing war.
And yet the other half of him couldn't walk away so easily.
The silence stretched out again, broken when she finally spoke. Aurostibite pressed his lips together as he considered her, and when she stepped closer, his chest tightened, a skittering of his heart making him curse himself for reacting at all, even if it wasn't a visible reaction.
The question caught him off guard. He blinked rapidly, staring at Mintaka for a full minute before he found the words to answer her with.
"...yes," he said finally, quietly, his voice as level as he could get it. Gloved hands clenched into light fists at his sides, and then eased out and relaxed again, the process repeated subconsciously. "Yes, I have. I read a great deal of books."
There was a small pause, and then, "Sherlock Holmes, especially."
Aurostibite wondered if he was supposed to ask her a question now in return, but he floundered uselessly and remained infuriatingly silent.
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Posted: Sat Oct 25, 2014 9:56 am
The stony look and silence was not new to Mintaka, though it should've been. It was hard to not see future Aurostibite in the past Aurostibite. It was hard not to 'remember' that for a year that she spoke to him in the beginning was the only way she had come to earn his love.
"Detective!" Mintaka smiled fondly, as if she was remembering when she would find him on the couch, engrossed in the series of stories. She couldn't relate to the love for Holmes, but sometimes she would read one, just to talk to him.
Her heart fluttered and she brought her hand up to it. The tears had finally stopped, and she was clutching her chest in hopes that the feelings would too. But they wouldn't, and it left a longing and void she wished to fill.
"And tea? Do you like tea now?" Did his preferences change with time with her? Did he have old habits that she didn't know about now?
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