[PRP] Bedside Manners are for Chumps (Kiki + Zac)

[Bittiface]

Kiki found a beaten up and out cold hunter in the haunted house. Making a face like she'd found a dog turd, she slowly walked around it. She didn't know them. They seemed... dead.

"Ew... ew a body omg ew..."

But then it breathed.

As a Life hunter, she felt maaaaaybe she should try and bring him home safe. She supposed. Kiki inched forward, reaching for a spot on him that wasn't dirty. Grabbing a hold of his arm, she grabbed her pendant and huffed.

"Deus Ex Machina."

- - - - - -

Zac would awake in the Infirmary. Kiki had teleported him to Deus, and gotten Life techs to haul his Kiwi a** into a bed. She stood beside him, bandaging the less complicated of his wounds herself. The rest of him had been taken care of by an actual Life Tech doctor.

She was chewing gum, blowing bubbles as she half hazzardly wrapped a limb of his in gauze. She seemed to be singing a Disney song to herself.  

[endejester]

He lifted his head slightly as consciousness returned, he was grateful to be alive just long enough to realize that he bloody hurt. Small wonder given, as memories patched themselves back together, the last thing he remembered was a disturbing crunch through his chest.

Disney songs, he was pretty sure weren’t helping. He didn’t know the girl who was helping him either.

“…. Thank you?” he managed though his mouth felt like it was now comprised of sand paper and rubber cement. It was not a nice feeling to add to the rest


Was she really singing ‘whistle while you work?’….great, now he was going to have that stuck in his head.

Bittiface

 

[Bittiface]

"You are ever so welcome~" She sing songed merrily. It almost sounded like she was pretneding to be Snow White for a moment. Albeit patronizing in tone. She tightened the end of the bandage with a sadistic smile.

"There. All patched up. Lucky for you, my keen Life senses saw you were more than a dead corpse. So I hauled your a** back to Deus out of good will." Kiki sang her praises, looking down at the odd man.

"Soooo like... Why were you napping in the Haunted House? Get your a** handed to you, or what?"

endejester

 

[endejester]

“Ita, raru! e mamae!” he exclaimed despite himself and his rasping voice when she tightened the bandage complete with sadistic smile.

He let out a small groan and closed his eyes again for a moment. “…Ah…yes. There…there was a taniwha there, some… shadow beastie.”

“Might I ask…for some water?”

Bittiface

 

[Bittiface]

"A tani whata? What the ******** is that?" Kiki asked incredulously.

His request was met with a hum of indecision. "I gueeeeessss. I mean, you asked nice and all." And not cause she was on duty or nothing. Kiki left him for the moment. She returned shortly after with his water, holding out to him impatiently. She'd likely drop it on his lap if he wasn't quick.

endejester

 

[endejester]

“…right, sorry, English.” He said and took the water gingerly. Some part of him expected her (for some odd reason) to slap the bottom of the cup just because it might amuse her.

He at least tried to be quick, if for no other reason that she didn’t seem very patient about this at all. He wondered if he’d been rude enough to…ruin her shirt or something by bleeding on it.

“Taniwha…” he said again after he had a glorious drink of water that he was forcing himself not to chug, he rather suspected he’d regret it if he did. “Means monster, big monster.”

Bittiface

 

[Bittiface]

"Big monster?" She parroted, scooching a chair over to sit down on. "Halloween is full of monsters, chump. I read about them in the library. Be more specific."

endejester

 

[endejester]

“Au! I don’t know what it bloody was, it called itself a lady, it had a mask for a face and its hands weren’t bloody attached ye hoon.”

This devolved into a grimace because talking, and breathing all did a lot of work on things that had been, to put it nicely, ‘abused’ recently, namely his chest, and to a degree his nicely clawed abdomen as well, which probably didn’t help the fray in his tempter to be called a chump, then again he’d countered with calling her a Hoon, though that wasn’t really a word she was likely to know.


‘It’s mouth never moved when it spoke. It had one but it was like a mask…eh?”

Bittiface

 

[Bittiface]

Kiki's curious smile faded into a grimace.

She took back the cup of water.

"So, a doll?" She asked, unamused and serious. "Or like, a puppet.. Whatever. You didn't die, so don't get your panties in a twist."

endejester

 

[endejester]

“If that thing would explain why some people have phobias about dolls and puppets, then…sure, yes, puppet, doll…creepy mask face monster who didn’t appreciate calling the Haunted House ‘no mans land’.” He nodded with the statement and then rolled his shoulder in a shrug, wincing at the pull and tug of it though he tried to suppress the grimace.

He looked torn between offended and contemplative when she told him not to get his panties in a twist, her manners were s**t when you came down to it, but she had a point, so at last he nodded.

“Yeah… just don’t tell me pain is proof alright?” He grinned slightly.

"Sorry, bit mad at myself I guess."

Bittiface

 

[Bittiface]

"Hmmmm~ I love dolls. It'd be nice if it was a pretty doll. I'd love to add it to my collection." She hummed happily, a sly smile etched into her round features.

"Awwww don't be mad~." She mocked with false sympathy, "Maybe you'll kill her next time. Or capture her. The ;labs could always use specimens, I suppose." She twirled his cup of water within her hand.

endejester

 

[endejester]

“Right… not going to happen unless maybe I bring rep with me.” He grimaced. “But oh yeah, lovely doll that one, great smile.” His eyes narrowed slightly with the last of the information, deadpan sarcasm.

“I’ll be sure to say you’d like her for your collection, how’s that sound?”

He opted to try and get up, It seemed like a better option than staying with creepy doll girls. It also was a stupid idea and ended shortly there after. Attempt one to escape… failed.

“Was it your people skills that landed you in Life division?”

Bittiface

 

[Bittiface]

"Please do." She didn't actually want a Halloween student as a doll. That would be scary and messed up. Normal dolls. Lifeless ones. Those were more her speed.

"My people skills?" Aw, was he trying to be sassy? She huffed and pushed him back down after his failed attempt at leaving, tucking his blankets back into his bed. "Don't be silly. People are d**k bags. Not worth the effort to be nice to."

"It's almost adorable how you think you're so clever. Your breath reeks of sarcasm and lies. Or maybe you're just due to have those teeth brushed."

She smirked at his with an evil glint in her eye.

"Do you need help with that, precious?"

endejester

 

[endejester]

“Please tell me your assessment on people being d**k-bags came before you decided that they weren’t worth being nice to.”

“And no… ‘Darling’, he supplied in return to her comment of ‘precious’,
“I don’t take teeth advice from anyone who’s so clearly full of shite. Thanks though…”



He had an all too clear idea that she might take rather too much malicious pleasure in trying to ‘help’ him do anything. With all the pink she was sporting he was amazed he hadn’t woken up with his hair braided and done with ribbons.

Maybe that came AFTER she decided you were worth bothering.

Bittiface

 

[Bittiface]

"No one is worth being nice to." She smiled easily. "The only person who matters in my life is me. So really, why would I make an effort to pretend to be nice unless it would ultimately help me?" It all came readily off of her tongue, as if it was a simple fact of life. Like breathing, or blinking. Kiki was the centre of Kiki's world.

"Well, if you don't want my help, that's okay. You seem to be doing just fine." She smacked his knee and stood up. "I think you'll be kicked out of here and back on duty in no time. After all, if your mouth is that quick to be smart, you can't be that hurt."

endejester