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 Posted: Wed Jul 30, 2014 12:48 pm
The checklist in Ian's pocket contained a list of things that he was attempting to do in order to better his current life. Obviously the main item on the list had to do with Shiloh, and so did a number of other things; but also near the top at number three was Talk more to your old friends. He couldn't even remember the last time he'd talked to half of the friends he'd used to have, especially "Before Everything" (which was how he'd started to refer to it in his head).
Nearly dying had changed everything. He had ******** things up badly, and this was the start of Ian's attempts at fixing it. Already having decided to take care of Jack's room as a part of this, it was now back to finding the people he'd once thought of as close and getting back into the groove of actually having friends. Ian had spent most of his life keeping walls up so that he'd be able to never get too close to anyone, and for the most part it had worked.
Deus, however, had changed that, and in spite of Ian's reservations and his fears about getting too close to people, it was a little too late to start deciding he didn't want to be around anyone. Things had already begun to change; he needed to change with it.
So with a bag of supplies in one hand and dressed in a pair of black jeans and a black shirt, the bandages still wrapped around his neck, Ian made his way to the room of one Ripley Crowell, a lollipop held in his mouth. He clicked it against his teeth, lifted his hand, and knocked.
"Yo, Ripley, it's Ian - you in, man?"
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Posted: Wed Jul 30, 2014 7:35 pm
Ripley was in an inexplicable good mood. Not that it was immediately obvious in his expression or body language, but he was. He really, truely was. The day wasn't as hot as it tended to be, he had a new book to study from and a fresh glass of water to drink from, but more importantly: he was being left alone. There had been no knocks on his door, no casual forced entry into his room, and more importantly, no demanding texts. It was a really, really good day.
And then someone knocked on his door.
He let out a heavy sigh at first, but didn't quite move. Whoever was on the other side would announce themselves soon enough - or so he imagined - and it certainly wasn't Finn. Finn would have just talked in after all, it was part of their agreement.
Ah. Ian.
Now that was a voice and name he hadn't heard for a while, and almost immediately his initial grump over being interrupted faded away. He stood and crossed the room, opening the door to take a look at the taller - and apparently wounded - man.
"You're looking much better." He commented idly, as the last time he saw the man he was...well, in very bad straights. "What's up?"
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Posted: Wed Jul 30, 2014 7:57 pm
For a moment, he hadn't thought that Ripley was in, or maybe he was just annoyed that Ian had all but ditched him for the past several weeks (nearing a month, which was kind of embarrassing, but it hadn't ever been personal, just cowardly on Ian's part). Ian fidgeted where he stood, shifting his weight from one foot to the other, waiting slightly anxiously for a sound from the other side.
A second later there was a click, and the door swung open, and relief was clearly evident across Ian's face as he smiled down at Ripley, some of the tension easing from his shoulders, which had been slightly stiff.
"Hey, Sammy," he said, and then lifted a hand automatically, fingers brushing self-consciously at the bandages at his neck. "Uh, yeah, I, uh...guess so. Better than I've been in a while, really." He gave a small laugh, though some of the nervousness was slightly apparent; a very un-Ian characteristic that was throwing him off. Naomi made a soft relax inside of his head, and Ian took a small breath.
"I just hadn't seen you in a while, is all," said Ian. He held up the plastic bag he was holding, which held an assortment of junk food. "I brought you some grub, I was just wondering if you wanted to sit and talk for a bit, you know." His face flushed a little. "Catch up and all."
This whole friend thing was turning out a lot more nerve wracking than he had thought it would be.
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Posted: Thu Jul 31, 2014 6:55 am
"Sam." Ripley corrected almost instantly, finding a rather strange sort of comfort in this old, almost childish game. A lot of things had happened since the last time they played this, but getting back to basics - or even just to an easier time - was nice.
"I'm glad." It was good to see him admit that he was better now, at least mostly; it hadn't been fun trying to stage an intervention for a blind drunk that didn't want one. It never got far, but the point was, an effort had been made. Though he did find it interesting that Ian seemed terribly nervous, which wasn't surprising, just interesting. It wasn't like he would have held his behaviour against him, after all. He'd been in something similar once, after all.
Amber eyes dropped to the offered bag, and then back up to meet Ian's. The question then became: should he let him in? The answer was actually quite obvious, but for one small thing: His new...agreement...basically prohibited bringing other people into his room and bed. While he understood it was a rule that implied for sexual reasons, it was still fairly open ended. Especially when he brought to mind the fact he only had one chair: they'd either have to sit on the floor or bed. It meant that the petty and grumpy man, if feeling particularly argumentative that day, could claim it meant everyone, for any reason, and that even sitting on the bed for a catch up talk could be turned into a violation of the rules.
Dammit, he knew he should have been more sober when they discussed it.
"Sure. Come on in." Ripley decided after an obvious pause. If Finn decided to be an a** and argue a somewhat grey rule, then he could go ******** himself.
Instead he opened the door wider and took a small side step, giving Ian enough room to come in if he wanted.
"Make yourself at home." He offered with a well placed smile. "I'm running low on drinks though." It was an important thing to add, though the intention was not to poke at poor Ian's earlier vices.
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Posted: Thu Jul 31, 2014 7:37 am
There was a certain sense of relief at the quick reply of Sam to Ian's Sammy. Sure, it was a silly and vaguely childish habit, but Ian was nothing if not sentimental, try as he might not to be. In spite of his repeated attempts at keeping people at a respectable distance, there were just some that managed to worm under the walls of his heart, and Ripley, in spite of not seeing him for as long as he had, was one of them.
Ian offered a tentative smile as the man in question hesitated; a clear pause that made Ian suddenly worried that he'd offended him and that Ripley really didn't want to see him or deal with him after all. After all, he'd been dead drunk and angry the last time, and just thinking about it made him thoroughly humiliated. He shifted anxiously from one foot to the other, pressing his lips together and trying to make it look like he was perfectly at ease with everything, rather than pained as all heck.
The scar beneath the bandages on his neck throbbed a little, as though reminding of him what he was doing and why.
Ian's smile turned from a hesitant one to a relieved one as Ripley moved back, pulling the door open wider, and Ian stepped into the room, trying to ignore the horrible and annoying nervousness. He cast a glance around the room - which looked like typical Ripley - and then chose to sit on the floor beside the bed, sliding down so that he could lean against it. The chair and bed were left for Ripley to choose to sit on if he wanted, seeing as how it was his room Ian was invading.
"It's okay," he said, crossing one leg over the other and plopping the bag into his lap and hoping it wasn't a crack at his previous issues; though Ian still winced a little automatically. "I brought some water bottles with me that I took from the kitchens."
He rummaged around for a moment and then pulled out two, stretching out a hand to offer Ripley one.
"So," he said, looking up at the other. "Now that we've got the sustenance and the hydration...how are you, Ripley?" A slight pause as Ian shifted where he sat, taking a small breath and reminding himself that in spite of everything, they were (hopefully) still friends. "You doing well?"
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Posted: Thu Jul 31, 2014 11:24 am
Ripley's room was as organized as anyone would have expected of him which was, likely, overly so. Everything had a very specific place, and any visible labels were pointed outwards, making it easier to read at a glance. The only thing out of place was the way his chair sat, and the way the book he had been reading rested on an angle.
He found Ian's choice of seat rather interesting, but one that solved a good half of his problems. It only took him a moment to decide where to put himself: beside his adopted brother, on the floor with the bed as a back rest. A gloved hand closed around the offered water bottle, but instead of drinking it, or even opening it, he merely sat it beside his knee.
"Well enough." He agreed, tilting his head to look at Ian out of ther corner of his eye. "Alive." Which was important, of course. The most important thing. "Though I spend more time in the infirmary than I care to." Which was sad, but alas. He imagined it would also be something that continued on, since Wilhelm insisted on getting larger and heavier instead of growing to match him.
He heard a faint scoff in the back of his mind.
"And you?" Ripley turned the question back on Ian, if only to get it away from himself. "Done anything interesting lately?"
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Posted: Thu Jul 31, 2014 12:54 pm
Ian busied himself with looking for a good snack while Ripley closed the door and crossed the room towards him. The bag contained a mixture of random items of food, stemming from several bags of various chips, a few chocolate granola bars, some smiley face shaped fruit snacks, and some M&M's. Way at the bottom of the bag was also a package of Extra Spicy Beef Jerky, now with Siracha! Ian plucked out a granola bar himself and then noticed that Ripley had sat beside him, rather than on the chair or the bed. This pleased him, for several reasons, the first and foremost meaning that Ripley was maybe not as wary of him as he had originally thought. If he had really been hesitant, Ian was certain Ripley would have sat on the chair, or on the bed, leaving a fair amount of space between them. As it was, a stupid, silly pleased flush of pale pink dotted Ian's cheeks.
Maybe he could make this work after all.
"Alive is good," said Ian agreeably, passing the bag of snacks towards Ripley and beginning to unwrap his granola bar. "Much better than the alternative, though spending a lot of time in the infirmary isn't as much fun." A hesitant glance was directed towards the other. "But you're okay, right? I mean, you're not in the infirmary now, so you're okay, right?"
Shifting his legs a little to draw one up against his chest, Ian took a bite of his granola bar and chewed silently, swallowing after a moment. "Been doing a lot of thinking lately," he admitted, tapping a finger against his knee. "I don't know if you heard, but after...after Nevada died, I just...I went downhill fast. You saw some of of it, with the drinking, and the...well, everything. I just couldn't handle losing her, and I couldn't handle pretty much anything."
He gave a little laugh, drawing his other leg up to match the other, Ian's hands in his lap, the granola bar forgotten. "I ******** things up pretty badly," he said. "I broke up with Shiloh because I was too afraid of being with him and I was trying to keep myself from hurting him, and I the process, I hurt him. I stopped talking to everyone...like you," he added, his face flushing in embarrassment and shame. "I cut myself off from the rest of the world and spent my time getting dead drunk to the point of passing out. All the stupid s**t basically, the stupidest s**t there was."
He felt ashamed of himself just thinking about it, but it was the first time he'd actually said something about it aloud, other than when he'd talked to Shiloh. He'd talked to Jack, in the infirmary, but even then he hadn't really owned up to anything, instead just making excuses and running away, like he always did. But he'd long since learned that just because he ignored a problem did not mean that it went away.
Ian sighed, lifting a hand to run it through his hair before he turned his head to look at Ripley. His face was still flushed, but there was a slight look of hope in his eyes, an almost pleading expression that he was trying very hard to hide. "What I'm trying to say is," said Ian carefully, slowly, "is that I ******** up and that I'm an idiot. I keep barriers around myself for a reason, but you've always been a good guy. I've never been good at being close to people, because I'm a coward by nature. And I'm sorry I pushed you away and ignored you all this time. I woke you up into this nightmare, and then I just...cut you off. And I'm ******** sorry I messed up, and I want to be friends again."
A tentative smile. "Long story short, I miss being friends with you, Sammy."
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Posted: Thu Jul 31, 2014 8:39 pm
"I'm alright." Ripley confirmed, briefly wondering why Ian kept asking. Perhaps those words meant something more than what they were at face value? He pondered those implications as he surveyed the food that Ian had brought, which amounted to a lot of sweets. He wasn't a big fan of them, but since they were offered, well, he'd eat them. Though the granola bars and the beef jerky looked rather delicious.
But he didn't give in to the food, instead he focused on Ian, watching him as he spoke. He knew a great deal of what went on, but only through word of mouth. Sure he could have sought out the other man to get some information from him while it was happening, but with all that booze behind all those walls it would have been next to impossible. Besides, he was finding out about it now at least, which was better late than never.
He also tried pretty hard to not laugh at the implications that he was a good guy. That was a very funny joke, Ian. Very Funny.
When it got right down to it, he understood why Ian did what he did. So much so in fact, that he could see himself doing the same thing, or at least something very similar. Not only that, but he had seen other people in Ian's position, more than he cared to admit. It was a sad fact of life. When he finished speaking and gave that tentative smile of his, Ripley took it as his cue to reciprocate, and offered him a thin, hopefully encouraging smile in return.
"You ******** up." Ripley agreed through his smile as he reached out to close his gloved hand over Ian's. "Really badly." He added, because he was helping. "But that's normal. Everyone has the capacity to do something so outrageously stupid, and you'd be surprised how many people act on it." He gestured vaguely with his free hand. "And this island, it ******** with your head. What is important though, is that you figured it out and are willing to make amends." Because it wasn't easy to face those you considered friends after such a difficult event.
"You're forgiven, and we're still friends." He gave Ian's hand a small squeeze. "But the next time you think about pushing your friends away..." Letting go of Ian's hand, he instead gave the man a sharp smack upside the head. "Don't."
It was miraculous, important advice, truly.
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Posted: Thu Jul 31, 2014 9:11 pm
He kept asking, mainly because Ripley was exactly the type to not show anything at all and then keep everything bottled up inside of him - exactly as Ian had done. Except Ripley was much less erratic than Ian was, much less dependent on the things that Ian was dependent on. He was a great deal more level headed than Ian had ever been. They were still similar in certain regards, however, which was probably why Ian had found Ripley so appealing in the first place.
The smile was encouraging, however small it was, even if the following words made Ian wince and flinch, as though they were driving physically into him with each syllable. Still, he appreciated the honestly, even if it was blunt, and appreciated even more the touch of Ripley's hand over his, gloved fingers a gentle pressure atop his own. Ian was slightly startled; he was normally the more physical one, but the tension was slowly ebbing away from his stiff neck and shoulders, and soon he'd relaxed back against the bed, a small smile on his face.
"I - " he started to say, but Ripley had pulled his hand away and smacked him across the backside of his head, Ian letting out a squawking "Ow!" as his head rung, Ian lifting both hands to clap them on either side of his head. "You ******** it was said with a certain amount of affection as Ian lowered his arms, his cheeks pink, a small smile on his face as he looked at Ripley. "Thanks," he said quietly, and leaned over, pushing his forehead against the other's shoulder, relief washing over him like a wave. "Thanks, a helluva lot, Sammy."
The silly little nickname would, unfortunately for Ripley, stick (though he would argue it was better than Ripples. Ian turned his head so that the side of his face was against Ripley's shoulder instead of his forehead and closed his eyes, grinning. "You're still the same as you always were, and I'm glad about that, even if you just <******** hit me, you jerk."
He sat up again and huffed. "We need to hang out more, okay?"
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Posted: Fri Aug 01, 2014 5:26 am
Ripley had learned a long time ago the affect a well placed gesture -such as physical contact - could have, and he had simply made use of that knowledge now. It wasn't that he was trying to appease the man to get it over with faster; it was simply that he had very little else in his repertoire when it came to helping a friend. He had so few in his life, he had no choice but to fall back on more scientific methods in an attempt to keep them.
But he was still quite himself, which was pretty much where the smack came from. It made his hand sting even through the glove, but it was worth it.
"Don't do stupid things, and I won't have a reason to hit you." He replied to the oh-so-affectionate curse of a nickname, his voice flat as if quite serious, but the small smile that remained suggested he could have been joking, at least a little.
"You're welcome." He said, his smile fading and his tone shifting easily to something that resembled honesty. "Just glad to have you back, man." The intermediate murmured, glancing down at the top of Ian's head, hoping with all his icy little heart that Finn wouldn't choose now to waltz into his room.
"I agree." His problem was solved as Ian leaned away again, and instead he turned to view the sweets buffet in front of them. It was a pretty good indication that Ian hadn't meant to spill and leave, at least. "Well, I'm not about to kick you out any time soon." Which was pretty much his own way of saying he didn't mind hanging out now.
"Did you make up with Shiloh?" He asked - more like guessed - after a moment of thought. As much as he didn't want to dig into Ian's personal business, he didn't want to pretend it didn't happen - and as far as he knew, they were very close.
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Posted: Fri Aug 01, 2014 8:25 am
Ian was glad for the physical gesture, because that was how Ian was used to communicating all his life; little touches here and there, warm embraces, leaning against people, holding hands - all things he was used to doing because he could communicate better without words than he could with them most of the time. He was still learning how to express himself with actual sentences, like a child who hadn't learned to talk at the right time.
"Fine," said Ian, with a roll of his eyes, but there wasn't any real annoyance in his voice, or his expression. "But I'll probably still do stupid s**t, because no one on this island doesn't do stupid s**t. Like you said, this place does stuff to us; it messes with us. But I promise that the next time I do something stupid, I'll try and fix it instead of running away again, deal?"
Ripley was certainly a hard man to get along with, and as stoic as ever, but Ian liked that about him, hence the need to fix their friendship. Ian stuffed the last of his granola bar into his mouth and then reached for his own water bottle, twisting off the cap and taking a swallow. "Good," he said, and then, as though to reassure himself, "Good."
He lowered the bottle, and his expression had shifted at the mention of Shiloh, Ian's cheeks flushing, his eyes bright."Yeah," he said. "Yeah, we made up. We just moved in together," he added, clearly very thrilled with this, Ian beaming at Ripley. "Into Shiloh's room. Trainee dorms are kinda small, so it's a little cramped until we both can move upstairs, but, y'know, it's worth it."
Ian gave a little shrug, looking stupidly affectionate. "I'm glad he took me back," he said, running a hand through his hair. "I thought he might not, after...after everything, but it's all good now - or, well, you know, mostly good. I finally managed to tell him that I love him, so that's good."
His bright eyed gaze was turned towards Ripley again. "Oh! That reminds me, Shy and I were thinking of having a little get-together, you know? Just invite some of the guys over to celebrate our newfound bliss as boyfriends and roommates. Nothing too fancy," he added. "Just some of our closest friends over for drinks, maybe watch a movie or something. What do you say? You interested? It's been a while, so I don't know if you're dating anyone, but if you are, feel free to bring her along too. It'll just be super casual," Ian said, smiling. "We're both trying to...make up for our lack of socializing, Shy and me."
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Posted: Fri Aug 01, 2014 10:13 am
"I wasn't talking about small-scale." Ripley corrected with a shrug, his voice distant as though it didn't particularly matter. He believed Ian when he said he wasn't going to do it again, and so he felt little to no need to dwell on it. Ian was, as far as he could tell, a man of his word. "But, deal." He agreed easy enough, because it was the proper thing to do.
The way Ian flushed told him everything he needed to know, but it was nice to hear it spoken, too. Ripley found himself smiling - actually smiling - for his friend and his newly found (or perhaps rekindled?) happiness.
"Hey man, congrats!" Ripley said, and meant it. "That's a pretty big step." All of it, really. From admitting something as important as love to moving in together, and trusting that your personal habits won't want to make your partner kill you. It was a big deal, and a part of Ripley was somewhat envious that Ian was able to accomplish such a thing; he didn't have it in himself to do the same, and likely never would. The idea was actually pretty ridiculous, even with his current...arrangement.
"Hmm?" He hummed as Ian began again, this time with a reminded thought. The Intermediate listened, but was also semi-distracted as he picked through the junk food to grab something a lot less sweet. By the time the offer was laid on the table, he had picked out the M&Ms, deciding that chocolate was probably a decent enough idea right now.
"Sounds like fun. You can count me in." He mused, quietly avoiding most of what was being said, especially in regards to the whole dating and her thing, though he did internally find the thought amusing. Finn. Her. Hah. "It's a good idea. It's been a while since we were all together." The last time he could remember was when Jack was suffering from a case of Finn Dare, and that seemed like a whole lifetime ago. He popped a few of the candy coated chocolates into his mouth, chewing thoughtfully before he spoke again: "Are you inviting Finn?"
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Posted: Fri Aug 01, 2014 11:03 am
He was going to crack the nut that was Ripley Crowell eventually, Ian was determined. And he was glad - very glad - to see the smile on Ripley's face, because the man was so damned stoic all the time that it was rare to see anything other than a mildly disinterested look on his pale face.
"Thanks," said Ian happily. "I've never really lived with anyone other than my ah...well, my previous boyfriend slash not boyfriend," he said, sounding a little wary at the mention, slightly saddened. He waved a hand as though brushing it away. "But that was a long time ago, so it doesn't really matter anymore. I'm living with Shiloh, and he wants me to, and that's all that I care about."
He could have gone on forever about Shiloh, but it would have strayed far into gushing starry-eyed territory, which Ripley would probably find immensely boring, so Ian stopped where he was, wrapping his arms around his knees and laying his head atop of them, turned so that he could see Ripley.
"Good, I'm glad," he said, face brightening. "We haven't set a date yet to have anything, but it'll probably be in the next week or so, once Jack gets back from his mission, which will hopefully be soon. He's antisocial as ********, but I'm still going to invite him."
Ian lifted his head and stretched out his legs, reaching for a bag of chips. "Of course," he said, with a roll of his eyes, an amused look on his face. "Gotta invite Finn, though I haven't asked him yet. It wouldn't be a proper gathering without His Dickship. Why, did you not want me to ask him?"
He was grinning, Ian nudging Ripley's shoulder with his own. "I think it'll probably be something Shy, Finn, Jack, you, and me, of course, maybe Fini, since she's pretty much one of the guys now, but I haven't seen her around lately. So maybe it'll be just us five. Got any movie you're dying to see?"
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Posted: Sat Aug 02, 2014 6:36 pm
"If he's willing to put up with your crazy a**, all the power to him." Ripley grinned briefly, looking down at the bag of candy between his gloved hands. It wouldn't have mattered to him if Ian continued to gush; he'd just sit there with his M&Ms and listen enough to follow. It was nice to have someone in their group who was genuinely happy (someone aside from Abbi anyway, whom he was certain didn't have an off switch on the optimistic), because the rest of them were grumpy, annoying, anti-social ******** ups.
It seemed that Finn was being invited, which saved him the effort it would take to not only invite him, but to explain the sort-of-but-not-really relationship they currently had. The nickname though, made him snicker.
"Are you kidding? If you didn't invite his pompous a** he'd never let you forget it." He grinned for a moment, before nodding slightly. "It wouldn't be." He agreed, though he found himself actively believing what he had just said. A party with them was far from complete without the General Asshat himself, but he wasn't entirely sure where that sentiment came from. Certainly not from feelings, of course. That would be silly.
"I haven't been keeping up." He admitted around a couple more chocolates. "Nothing supernatural or horror, please." That was his real life, he didn't need to waste an hour and a half of his life with something he could see every day, all day. "I'd rather watch porn with everyone." He said, as if it would show how much he didn't want to watch supernatural or horror movies.
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Posted: Sat Aug 02, 2014 7:45 pm
Ian did the very mature adult thing and stuck out his tongue at Ripley. "Yeah, well, I'm glad he puts up with my crazy a** and for you too," he said, ripping open the bag of Doritos and popping one in his mouth, chewing slowly as he looked at the other with an expression something akin to a smirk. After a moment he swallowed and said, "You can just admit it, y'know; that you're a good guy, 'cause even though all of us are ******** up, you're pretty sane."
He ate another chip and added, "If I didn't invite Finn, he'd sulk for days. I should think of a better nickname for him than His Dickship, though, it doesn't have quite as nice a ring to it as Sammy does. Jack doesn't have a nickname either, I should remedy this for him..."
Lifting a hand, Ian absently ran his fingers along the bandages on his neck without looking like he knew he was doing it. "So no Supernatural," he said with a grin and a small laugh. He shook his head, which, since he no longer had his trademark long hair (he was still trying to grow it out again, but it was slow going), felt somewhat stranger than usual. "I'm not so sure how anyone else would feel about that. The Finn twins would probably laugh, Jack would be disgusted, and if I invite Quinn and Oliver, they would probably be traumatized, bless them. And I'm pretty sure Shy would have something to say about it too," he added, chuckling.
"But no horror," said Ian with a nod. "Maybe I'll get like...one of those stupid comedy movies, like Elf or Anchorman or something, just something really lighthearted. We get enough dark and creepy s**t on a daily basis in our real lives, we could use something stupid and ridiculous."
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