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[Q] Michiko Mei Wakahisa (Sailor Dejanira) Goto Page: 1 2 [>] [»|]

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Midnightglow18

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PostPosted: Fri Jul 18, 2014 1:16 pm


Name: Michiko Mei Wakahisa

Nickname: Michi

Age: 16

Birthday: June 28th

Sign: Cancer

Gemstone: Ruby

Blood Type: A +

Fav. Food: Pizza, Chinese food, candy, soda, raspberries

Hated Food: Grapefruit, coconut, figs

School: Meadowview High School (Co-Ed)

Hobbies:

Gardening - Michi loves to tend her flowers and fruit bushes. She has a small garden in her parents backyard where she tends her raspberries, blackberries, blueberries, roses, violets, and butterfly bushes. Every day she waters them, speaks to them, and sings to them. She feels like the flowers understand her more than people sometimes. Michi also volunteers at the local community garden helping to grown vegetables and other plants.

Painting - Michi is very fond of painting and usually works on pieces for weeks at a time. It takes her a while to finish a piece, especially with school and her gardening, but she spends a little time each night working on her art projects. Michi's favorite medium is oil based paint, and she loves painting landscapes of her garden and other garden's she's seen. She is also trying to learn how to do portraits. She has an art class at school, and she practices at home.

Cooking -- Michi loves taking the fruit from her garden and making fruit desserts, like fruit tarts, raspberry cookies, and blueberry turnovers. She is also learning more recipes, in other areas of cooking. She has a home economics class in school. She also sometimes takes classes at her local community center to learn more.

Virtues:

Gentle -- Michi is gentle, short and sweet. She doesn't enjoy hunting other people, though she understands that even a rose must sometimes p***k to protect itself. She is one to offer aid to others, even if they have been cruel or hurtful to her in the past. Often, Michi will be mad for a few days and then forgive someone without them having to do a thing. It would take a great deal for her to finally lose her temper with someone and truly be angry with them. She is good with children, and does alright with adults. She doesn't have a problem with animals, but doesn't own any, since she doesn't want a dog digging up her flowers or cat hair on her paintings.

Creative -- Michi is a smart and creative girl, which is helpful to her in other aspects of her life in addition to just art, it helps her come up with innovative solutions to problems. She prefers seeking fun solutions to problems, even if it takes a little longer than the practical solution.

Flaws:

Shy -- Michi has trouble opening up to others. She would rather be hiding in her garden or behind an easel then attending a party. She is also not very skilled in social situations like communicating with others. She can deal with social situations, but in such she sometimes comes across as very quiet and not very confident.

Naive -- Michi always sees the good in others and she has trouble seeing others as dark and evil. This sometimes leads her into situations where she is left disappointed or even blindsided when she learns the person involved didn't deserve her trust to begin with. Michi needs to learn where to draw the line, so people don't take advantage of her gentle nature.

PHYSICAL DESCRIPTION

Eyes: almond-shaped, green eyes

Hair: Like this but red, with black streaked hair.

Face: Small delicate features, medium tone skin, maybe a slight tan, fit body, height 5'3"

Clothes: Basic uniform for school, and casual jeans and tee shirts for her normal attire.

--------------------------

Senshi: Sailor Dejanira (Link), senshi of raspberries

Challenge: "I may be sweet, but I have thorns!!"

Fuku Colour:

Main Color: Green

Secondary Color: Red??

Fuku: Female

Collar -- Plain sailor collar
Bow -- White and red large bow
Bodice -- A swimsuit-type bodice
Sleeves -- short sleeves
Brooch -- White flower
Bottoms -- School girl shirt
Tiara -- silver with little white flowers
Choker -- Choker
Shoes -- Green short heeled shoes
Gloves -- Short to wrist gloves
Accessories -- Earrings, berry shaped

Attacks: She is unable to use her attack if she is badly hurt, or other wise unable to move.

Sailor Scout Attack: Raspberry jam smash

Sailor Dejanira creates a red ball of magic raspberry jam that she jumps into the air and smashes down on her target. The attack has a stinging sensation (with skin contact) that lasts about 30 secs. range about 5 meters

Super Sailor Scout Attack: Raspberry jam blast (twice per battle)

Sailor Dejanira jumps into the air and shoots a ball of raspberry jam at her target. The attack has a slightly longer stinging sensation (must be skin contact), that lasts about 30 sec. range about 10 meters

Eternal Sailor Attack: Raspberry thorn bleed

Sailor Dejanira takes a serious focused pose, and blasts raspberry thorns at her target, causing small bleeding wounds and a stinging sensation that last about 10 sec. (10 thorns per sec.) range about 15 meters. Stinging sensation lasts for about 35 secs. (with skin contact)
PostPosted: Sat Jul 19, 2014 10:57 pm


Midnightglow18


Hi, Midnight! Welcome to the shop! I'm not an official critter or anything like that, but since you're asking for feedback I thought I might drop you a line. (If any of this rings false to you, please feel free to ignore me.)

Basics

Michi looks like a fun, down-to-earth 16-year-old girl! No notes here.

As a general note moving forward, you've got some spelling and grammar mistakes and might want to watch out for them. If you need help, let me know, and I'll send you a proofread version of your profile with notes about why I made the changes I made.

Hobbies

Gardening - I would love to know more about Michi's garden. Where is it? Is it big or small? Is it in her yard at home, a communal plot in her neighborhood, is she growing things in window boxes? Does she rent a greenhouse? Also, what kind of flowers does she grow? Does she only grow flowers, or does she grow vegetables or fruits or herbs as well? How long has she been gardening for? This is a really great start for a hobby, but adding more details would make Michi really stand out!

Painting - Again, this is a great start, but I'd love to see more detail. Does Michi like to use oils, acrylics, watercolors...? Does she prefer to paint landscapes, still lifes, portraits...? Does she take any art classes or practice this hobby entirely on her own? Hobbies can be a great way for characters to meet each other, so if there is a social aspect to any of Michi's it would be great to note it.

You have room here to add another hobby or two if you want to, but these are lovely on their own as well.

Virtues

Again, these are a good start and I can tell what you are going for and it's a lovely character, but I'd love to see you add more detail!

Gentle - You mention that Michi knows that she eventually needs to stop being kind and protect herself - where does she draw that line? How long does it take her to forgive those who have previously hurt her, and does she expect to be apologized to before forgiving them? In what other ways does Michi's gentleness affect her life? Is she good with children and animals? Does she get along well with her peers and adults?

Creative - Are Michi's solutions practical or outlandish? Do her solutions tend to be more efficient ways to do things, or does she think of more fun ways to do things, even if they take longer?

Flaws:

Shy - Does Michi go out of her way to avoid social situations? What does she do when forced to interact? Does she clam up? Does she become anxious? Can she "fake it" and be friendly, or does she come off as aloof and look for excuses to leave or a quiet corner to retreat to?

I think that for a second flaw, you've already got the seeds of Naive in her gentle virtue. You say that Michi trusts people who have hurt her in the past - is she so trusting that she is easily taken advantage of? Does she expect the best of people and get blindsided when people don't behave the way she expects them to

Physical description

Because of the style of the art, you don't need to specify "anime" shaped. Beyond that, how would characters within the world of the shop perceive her? Is she from a Japanese family background, like her name suggests? Are her eyes therefore almond-shaped?

How does Michi dress when she is out of uniform?

What is Michi's skintone? How tall is she? What is her body type - frail, fit, curvy?

Powered!

Please link to a source for your space object, like a wikipedia page.

For attacks, your second attack should be an upgrade of your first, and then your third can be different and stronger. You should also specify what the effects of her attacks are.

I think that you should go with Raspberry Jam Smash as her basic attack and then a stronger version for her second attack, and think of what the attack makes her target feel. Maybe it's intoxicating and makes it hard to focus? Maybe it creates a stinging sensation where it hits? You should also specify how long the effects of her attack last - maybe thirty seconds at basic, and a minute at super?

Shooting thorns at her target would be a great eternal rank attack - maybe they draw blood and cause a stinging sensation for a minute?

Silverah

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Midnightglow18

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PostPosted: Sun Jul 20, 2014 7:05 am


Silverah
Made some edits based on your suggestions 3nodding
PostPosted: Sun Jul 20, 2014 8:40 pm


Midnightglow18


Hiya! It's just a little quick thing, but the Admins are probably going to want to see 1 more virtue and one more Flaw. They like to keep the numbers even, but want atleast 3 of each~

One more hobby wouldn't be too bad either~ They like to make sure everyone is as well rounded as possible!

Sunflower-Seeds

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Midnightglow18

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PostPosted: Sun Jul 20, 2014 8:44 pm


Cooro Cooro
Midnightglow18


Hiya! It's just a little quick thing, but the Admins are probably going to want to see 1 more virtue and one more Flaw. They like to keep the numbers even, but want atleast 3 of each~

One more hobby wouldn't be too bad either~ They like to make sure everyone is as well rounded as possible!
Thank you ^_^
PostPosted: Fri Aug 22, 2014 1:40 am


Hi Midnight!!

Since Silv already did a wonderful job of critting you I am just here to add a few more questions to the pile!! Although I think her civilian side is fine now with what you have added.

Attacks:
How far can she throw these attacks? Does she always need to jump to activate the attack?

Other than that everything looks fine <333

matisha

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Midnightglow18

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PostPosted: Fri Aug 22, 2014 7:20 am


Matisha
Humm what would a reasonable distance be? And as for the jump, most attacks in the anime were always the same, does that matter for the game??
PostPosted: Fri Aug 22, 2014 9:04 am


Midnightglow18
Matisha
Humm what would a reasonable distance be? And as for the jump, most attacks in the anime were always the same, does that matter for the game??


[I would say anything from 5 to 10 meters if she has a good throwing arm!

Haha yes, sorry I was just wondering if she always had to jump to active the attack, say for example she fell over and was trapped could she still throw the ball? Or did she have to be jumping. I think I am working this attacks out with real life physics! XD!!

But if you just change the distance for how far she can throw the ball/thorns then I will give you a stamp! ]

matisha

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Midnightglow18

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PostPosted: Fri Aug 22, 2014 9:11 am


Matisha
Not unreasonable questions, I'm just asking more questions so I can figure out the answer ^_^ since after all some types of magic do require movement to work, so if she were unable to move her attack might not work 3nodding
PostPosted: Fri Aug 22, 2014 9:17 am


Midnightglow18
Matisha
Not unreasonable questions, I'm just asking more questions so I can figure out the answer ^_^ since after all some types of magic do require movement to work, so if she were unable to move her attack might not work 3nodding


Haha thats fine, here you go a GM give you a full stamp soon <3

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matisha

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Midnightglow18

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PostPosted: Fri Aug 22, 2014 9:29 am


Matisha
Midnightglow18
Matisha
Not unreasonable questions, I'm just asking more questions so I can figure out the answer ^_^ since after all some types of magic do require movement to work, so if she were unable to move her attack might not work 3nodding


Haha thats fine, here you go a GM give you a full stamp soon <3

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Thank you, I hope that edit is ok, I figured her first attack I'd do 5 meters and go up a little with her stronger attacks and it makes sense to be if she's hurt or can't move she can't attack
PostPosted: Wed Sep 03, 2014 12:32 pm


Midnightglow18


Hey, Midnight! Cute profile! I think she is almost ready for a stamp, but before I can do that I wanted to take a second for her attacks!

Her Sailor Scout attack looks great! I think that is a really good attack, though I was wondering—how bad is the stinging sensation? Does it only sting if the Raspberry comes into contact with direct skin or would clothing/armor protect the skin?

Sorry for the questions! I would just love to get a better idea of the attack!

For her Super attack, I think that one minute might be a little long; most senshi at eternal stage do not have a duration for this long! I think the attack might work better if you kept it at thirty seconds—but maybe instead of increasing the time, you could increase the amount of uses per battle? For example, maybe instead of that, she could use the attack for thirty seconds—but twice per battle? This would allow her to use it at different times or aim it for different targets without the attack being too long!

For her Eternal attack, I think one minute might be a little long for this attack—forty five seconds might be a little more fair since her magic causes some physical damage! Though, I might be overthinking this! About how many raspberry thorns could this attack produce—and would she be able to shoot them for the duration of the attack, or after she exhausts all her thorns it's only the stinging sensation that would last?

Sorry for the questions! I am really excited about getting your girl a stamp as soon as possible and just want to know a little more about her! Please give me a quote if you have any questions, comments or if you make any changes and I'll be back as soon as possible!


Kyuseisha no Hikari

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Midnightglow18

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PostPosted: Wed Sep 03, 2014 12:37 pm


Kyuseisha no Hikari
Midnightglow18


Hey, Midnight! Cute profile! I think she is almost ready for a stamp, but before I can do that I wanted to take a second for her attacks!

Her Sailor Scout attack looks great! I think that is a really good attack, though I was wondering—how bad is the stinging sensation? Does it only sting if the Raspberry comes into contact with direct skin or would clothing/armor protect the skin?

Sorry for the questions! I would just love to get a better idea of the attack!

For her Super attack, I think that one minute might be a little long; most senshi at eternal stage do not have a duration for this long! I think the attack might work better if you kept it at thirty seconds—but maybe instead of increasing the time, you could increase the amount of uses per battle? For example, maybe instead of that, she could use the attack for thirty seconds—but twice per battle? This would allow her to use it at different times or aim it for different targets without the attack being too long!

For her Eternal attack, I think one minute might be a little long for this attack—forty five seconds might be a little more fair since her magic causes some physical damage! Though, I might be overthinking this! About how many raspberry thorns could this attack produce—and would she be able to shoot them for the duration of the attack, or after she exhausts all her thorns it's only the stinging sensation that would last?

Sorry for the questions! I am really excited about getting your girl a stamp as soon as possible and just want to know a little more about her! Please give me a quote if you have any questions, comments or if you make any changes and I'll be back as soon as possible!


Questions are no problem I was just going by what other people suggested 3nodding
PostPosted: Thu Sep 04, 2014 8:32 am


Kyuseisha no Hikari
I made a couple of changes based on your suggestions ^_^

Midnightglow18

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Kyuseisha no Hikari

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Dragonslaying Dragon

PostPosted: Sat Sep 06, 2014 8:24 am


Midnightglow18

Awesome!

I just want to clarify one more thing (sorry!)! For her eternal attack, how long does she shoot raspberry thorns at her target? (Is it just at the beginning of the attack, where she gets to fire a barrage of them and then for the remainder of the 45 seconds the targets suffer from the stinging sensation?)
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