Welcome to Gaia! ::

The Teen Sex, Pregnancy and Puberty Guild

Back to Guilds

A guild for teenagers covering topics centering around teen sex, pregnancy, puberty, and other aspects of teen life. 

Tags: teens, puberty, sexuality, pregnancy, life issues 

Reply Depression and Other Mental Health Issues Subforum
I dont know what to do..

Quick Reply

Enter both words below, separated by a space:

Can't read the text? Click here

Submit

Dark Queen Bubble

PostPosted: Fri Mar 17, 2006 12:56 am


My family is messed up. My sister in almost 19 and she's left home. My dad and my mum used to fight a lot about my sister because my dad didn't like the fact that my sister had an opinion and my mum liked it. So they faught about it, a lot.

My parents drink almost every night. They work all day then come home and b***h about their jobs. My parents own their own business but they're in a lot of debt and so my mum had to get another job. My dad is jealous of my mum because she has another job and he "has" to work 14 hours a day then wants my mum to come into work when she gets up at 6 am every working day and doesn't come home until 6 - 8 pm at night. They fight about it because my mum works in an office, sits at a computer all day and she's tired and doesn't want to go to another job and work. My brother and I work at their business, he works Fridays, I work Saturdays.

My mum, sister, brother and I are depressed. I'm the youngest in the family yet after my sister left home, I'm the one that is stuck in the most resbonilibty. I don't have many friends, practically all my friends are people that I talk to over the internet, so that means I don't have much of a life.

Last night, everything just went into s**t.. My brother stayed home from school. (My brother is 16, I'm 14 - 15 in sept) He's been playing his music for the past week in the lounge room and he plays it really loud. He has large speekers and he puts the base on really loud. Now, I don't care if he wants to listen to his annoying music but he should at least play into his bedroom when its that loud. Its loud enough that you can hear it at the end of the street. Anyway.. The day he stayed him, I came home from school and he was watching his movie but he had it up really loud. So I asked him really nicely to turn it down. He kept telling me to get ******** so I got really annoyed, then my friend called and I could barely hear her because the TV was up so loud..

Later on, he kept having it up so loud that I got so pissed off, I called my dad up at work.. Then he got all mad at me and my brother for bothering him.. Then my brother had this big huge freak.. He almost punched me and threw a chair at me. Later on that night, about 12 in the morning, everyone was still awake but me. My brother cooked dinner and he didn't put everything away. My mum told my dad, just mentioned it and because my dad was really drunk he started a fight with my brother. My dad threw all my brothers stuff onto the back lawn. I heard them yelling so I got up out of bed.. An hour or so later they were still fighting but it had gotten worse.. My dad was hitting my brother and hitting my mum. Lots of things were broke and a wall was punched in.

I called the police because I was scared and I didn't want it to be worse.. They finally came and talked to everyone and everything was some what ok. I found out that my brother cuts himself and wants to die. And I can't do anything to help him because he doesn't listen to me anymore.. This morning, I woke up and my dad ignored everyone. I went to school and whatever. My mum picked me up and said that my brother and I aren't working anymore and that my dad doesn't want to have anything to do with us.

My mum is planning on leaving my dad and there isn't anything I can do anymore..

I'm really sorry for writing my life story but I had to explain it some how..

I don't know what to do anymore. I've had enough of my dad and my parents problems. I can't stand it anymore. I don't know what to do. I've had messed up thoughts and it's driving me nuts! Help me with something.. Please?
PostPosted: Fri Mar 17, 2006 1:07 am


EDIT -

I don't just need family help.. I also have self problems. I hate everything about me. I hate how I look, act, I don't think I'm special, smart, attractive, anything good about myself. Some days I do but either I look myself in the mirror and think about negative things about myself.

I can't keep a relationship for the following reasons:
1. I date depressed/messed up guys who treat me like s**t
2. They want to know my problems, I tell them, they freak out
3. I don't want to tell them my problems because I don't want them to freak out and leave.
4. My parents make them feel uncomfortable.

Things really became bad for me when I dated this guy named James. He was depressed and really messed up. He was 4 years older then me and he used to blame all his problems on me. He also wanted me to fix all of his problems and used to treat me badly. While I was dating him he used to say "I'd kill myself if you left me" And stuff like that. While we were dating, he lied to me, cheated on me and other things.

He made my self a steam much worse then what it was to begin with.

I take too much onto myself, I stress about little thing too often and it's hard for me to talk to people about it.

Dark Queen Bubble


Nikolita
Captain

PostPosted: Sun Mar 19, 2006 12:47 pm


H'okay, long list. Here we go. 3nodding

1) There's not much we can do to help you, but you're welcome to post in here whenever you feel like you need advice, support, or just some kinds words. heart

2) If you have such serious personal self problems, you don't need a relationship in your life because it's only going to complicate things. I speak from experience on this, too. It's hard to have a stable relationship with another person when you yourself are so unstable in general. And as you've already said, you don't seem to make good choices within a relationship anyways - you date guys who treat your badly and who aren't supportive of you regarding your problems, and you can't trust them because they'll leave you when you tell them about the problems in your life. So perhaps it might be best until you've sorted out yourself personally, and grown up a little bit and matured too before you attempt to have serious romantic relationship with someone. smile It makes all the difference in the world to have yourself and your life sorted out before you get into a relationship with someone. It also makes a huge difference when your partner is mature and caring enough to support you and care for you based on who you are, not what they want you to be.

3) Since you're not old enough to live on your own, is there someone else you could live with until your parents can sort out their problems? An aunt or an uncle, or perhaps even a really close friend? Alternate living arrangements (finding someone else to live with) might be something to look into.

4) Thinking negative things about yourself isn't going to do anything except make you feel worse about yourself. And if that's the case, why bother doing it? Work at changing your throughts from negative ones into positive ones. Every time you think something bad about yourself, erase it from your mind, or tell yourself that it's not true. If you need to think of good qualities that you have, you can sit down and write out a list each day - try to find 3 things that you like about yourself. Once you can consistently write 3 things, you can up it up to 4 or 5.

For example, just from reading your posts, I can say that you seem like a very nice person. You're helpful, and you seem like a very responsible person (you had a job at your age).

If you find you can't change your thinking by yourself, counselling or therapy might be something to consider. You can try going to a school counsellor, or you could ask your parents to take you to someone.

5) Counselling for the family might be something else to mention to your mother, sincen everyone is depressed, and your parents might be seperating. At the very least, you can still ask her for counselling for yourself if you feel it's necessary.


I hope everything works out for you. heart
PostPosted: Sun Mar 19, 2006 1:16 pm


Thank you. ^-^

Dark Queen Bubble

Reply
Depression and Other Mental Health Issues Subforum

 
Manage Your Items
Other Stuff
Get GCash
Offers
Get Items
More Items
Where Everyone Hangs Out
Other Community Areas
Virtual Spaces
Fun Stuff
Gaia's Games
Mini-Games
Play with GCash
Play with Platinum