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Posted: Sat May 31, 2014 9:22 pm
It was a beautiful summer day in the Bahamas. The sun was out, a light breeze was blowing, and for Camille it would have been like being home again. Sure there was a certain charm and life that was missing on this island compared to the one she'd been raised on and it was a little emptier, less crowded, but that wasn't necessarily a bad thing. Yet instead of enjoying the sun the way she should have been the Sun trainee had not even gone out for her morning jog. She'd simply stayed curled up in bed, head buried beneath a pillow, closing out the sun for the first time in her memory. Even Kidana had been left on the bedside table which was unusual in and of itself. Cami had been told to never take her totem off but there she sat. The revenant had tried to call her hunter back, scolding her, but a loud cry of "SHUT UP KIDANA!" in the empty dorm apartment silenced the ghost. Snapping at the closest, best company she'd had, who was only trying to keep her safe and do her best to guide the Antiguan through the perils of being a hunter, only made her feel worse. Twitter had not helped. Why she'd sat on the couch and bothered with that toxic pool of hate-slurry when in a down mood, she'd never understand. Before she knew it Cami was digging through Otto's closet, pulling out every spare blanket she could find, piling them up and crawling into their heavy weight. Without even a moment of hesitation her phone was chucked onto empty carpet near his drum set and she settled down to feel like utter s**t. Hanna had thought she was ******** Otto. Did everyone else? Why did it matter so much to her? To them? To anyone? Why did it matter that Otto was sleeping with Maebe? Why had Maebe lied to her? Why was Rep such an a*****e? Letting out a sound that might have been a choked sob she simply grabbed one of the three pillows she'd dragged into her cocoon and settled into depression.
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Posted: Sat May 31, 2014 9:31 pm
Otto returned home from his long journey outside the base. He dropped his duffel on the floor, running his hands through his hair with a sigh. Muggy, muggy weather. It was Hell being on the island sometimes. He was ready for a cool soda and some rockin tunes.
But something was way off.
There was a lump on the couch, a phone across the room, and a sound similar to a sob within. That had to be Cami. And if it was, why was she sad? His thoughts were brought to Twitter. Had something been said to make her unhappy? Had she had no one to curl up with to chase the pain away?
Otto hurried to her side, leaning down beside her and gently reaching a hand over the lump that was Cami under blankets. "Cami? What's wrong?"
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Posted: Sat May 31, 2014 9:38 pm
Oh if she looked hard enough, long enough, it was possible that Cami could have found someone. Jasper was always willing to be a shoulder if she could hunt him down and no doubt Peyton could have understood some of her frustration. Yet there would have been so much explaining, so much talking, so much to get straight or get wrong that it hadn't seemed worth the effort. At the touch and voice part of the lump of blanket lifted, a muffled voice from inside. "Otto?" Shifting some more the blanket was pulled into itself almost until a dark hand reached out to pat the nearest part of him she could reach. He could hear her a bit better, though her accent was so thick that it was perhaps difficult to understand if he wasn't used to it by now. "What isn't wrong today?" Yep. It was one of those days. Where everything was wrong and nothing seemed right. Though at least she wasn't angry at him? If anything Cami was happy to see him even if emerging from her blanket cocoon was not something that was going to happen. She was no butterfly.
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Posted: Sat May 31, 2014 9:45 pm
She sounded miserable. He had a hard time deciphering her accent beyond the fact she was upset about something. Something that was wrong. He held the hand that came out, worried that she wasn't just coming up to hug him like she always did.
That was a big clue that things were bad news bears in Camiland.
"What happened?" His worry was easy to hear in his tone, sitting himself down beside the couch. Planted. He'd stay there even if all she did was cry.
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Posted: Sat May 31, 2014 9:53 pm
The hand holding Otto's raised so that it issued a clear invitation to come on in and join her. There was more than enough room if they kicked the blankets around to make it big enough for two, she had a pillow he could use, or he could use her for all she cared. Actually that might have made things a ton better but she had trouble asking. Cami actually had quite a bit of trouble asking for the things that were important to her, things that belied that she wasn't the happy, smiling, carefree woman she tried so hard to be. She cared. She cared so much that it hurt -- like today. It was impossible to win, to make everyone like you, but that nearly no one was listening or willing to try? She was too soft. Her mother had always said that. Soft and weak. Since meeting Mimsy again Camille often thought that she would have been the ideal child for Vanessa Ryland. Competent, confident, brilliant. Instead what she got was a sweet marshmallow of a girl who wanted nothing more than hugs from her mother and storytimes. The light from their raised arms showed that indeed Cami had been crying, just a little, and she was utterly morose. "People are stupid." It seemed to sum it up so well!
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Posted: Sat May 31, 2014 10:03 pm
Otto's frown deepened at the sight of her. Someone had made her cry. This sweet, loveable lady. Idly, he wondered if he'd ever made others cry in secret from his blunt remarks. He told himself he didn't care. He told others he didn't care. He cared too much. Otto climbed in, wrapping them both in the cocoon she'd made, and snuggling close to the warm woman with a heart of gold. "Do'ya wanna talk about it?" He asked carefully, his hand cradling the back of her head. "Is it Twitter again?"
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Posted: Sat May 31, 2014 10:27 pm
The worst of it was she had made herself cry. One tear, maybe two, sneaked out again as Otto climbed into the nest she'd made to snuggle her in much the way she'd always flopped into the bedroom to grab him for quick hugs and a cuddle before dinner. It was becoming a habit to stagger in from training to flop down next to the full Hunter (the lucky b*****d), no matter what he was doing, and nap cuddled up to him. Cami felt she was often the comforter which was fine because it was a way to be needed, which she desperately required. Now it was Otto doing the comforting and it felt good that he cared enough about her to even try. Squeezing him once, tight, she tried to make her voice cooperate. "Sort of. I feel like a bad person. Like I'm doing something wrong because I keep somehow making things worse when I'm only trying to help." Again the blonde that had both entangled them flashed through her mind. "And even when I'm trying to be good I mess things up." They hadn't talked about it, had studiously avoided the topic, but it was making her ache. Yet there was still one worse. "You know I'm not...trying to take advantage of you, right? I think people think I seduced you so you let me move up here. I was asked how good at sex you were!" Which, again, seemed to bother her far more than it should have. Why? "They were all shocked when I said I was just your friend." Considering how they were cuddled up to each other at the moment she could maybe see how that could be misleading. But why was this bad? Why did it have to be like that? Always? "I don't like when they talk about you. I don't like it when they talk about me either but you're...you're nicer than I am." Dropping her head on his shoulder she let out a frustrated sound, swearing again and again in her native creole. "This is hard."
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Posted: Sat May 31, 2014 10:39 pm
Cami began to vent, and Otto felt his heart become heavier with each sobbing word. He felt terrible. She was in pain because of him. Because she cared so much. She was in some horrible position due to rumours, the judging and policing. "How could you make things worse? Cami.." He leaned in closer, brushing her hair away from her face. "You make them so much better." How dare they hurt her. How dare they make her feel this way. He'd known her for so short a time, but already she'd melted her way into his heart. Was it because he'd gotten softer? Or was it all her? She was worried she'd taken advantage, tried to worm her way in to get a nice room. He didn't give up his King size bed for just anyone. She'd made herself a cozy spot in his heart, and he was just fine with that. Because she shared the same morals. She was bubbly, warm and cuddly. She was everything he wasn't, and he needed it. He needed her. He needed warmth. "Nicer?" he was floored. "Cami, in what way have I ever struck you as a nice guy?" He just didn't see it. He huffed, giving her a warm kiss to her forehead. She was his friend, not a body to lose himself in. A heat he loved for what it was. Comfort. "I want you here. I like having you here. I like having someone who comes running for a hug to greet me. You keep me calm when I'm mad. You're just..." How could he make her happy again? "I'm so sorry you got hurt because of me. Please don't leave..."
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Posted: Sat May 31, 2014 10:54 pm
Otto said several shocking things in a very short space of time which, at the very least, stopped her from crying any further. Snagging the corner of a pillowcase she scrubbed at her eyes for a moment as he kissed her forehead, almost setting her waterworks off again immediately for an entirely different reason. "That's it, Otto, that's why you're so great. You took me somewhere I'd wanted to go my whole life when you barely knew me. You traded in your big bed for a second, smaller one and even picked out blankets you knew I'd like because you wanted me here. You like me. You let me run up and hug you, or flop down in bed to curl up because I'm tired and you make me feel so much less alone. You're the nicest guy and you don't even know it!" Apparently there were several topics upon which Camille could still be passionate and fervent, genuine to her core. Otto being one of the most generous people she'd ever met was apparently going to be one of them until the end of time. Or until he admitted that she was right. She was patient. Sort-of. "I'm never going to leave. You're the best friend I've ever had, Otto. I just...I'm sorry. I know I should smile and that's what I am and what I do but sometimes it's hard." Fingers curled into his shirt for just a moment as she tried to smile, tried to be the bubbly and warm person she was deep down. "I'm hurting because people are...they're cruel. They don't even try to understand you or think that you need someone too. And alright, maybe that girl is up to something or was up to something with a lot of people but they don't get it. It's not...you're not..." Lips pressed together. "They're mean and they're ignorant and it makes me angry. It makes me hurt for you. And...it makes me hurt a bit for me. I've never really had a steady boyfriend, or girlfriend, or anything. Lovers, sure. So I know I won't fit into their nice, neat boxes and one day they're all gonna turn on me too. It's a bit..scary." Her head found the curve of his shoulder, resting close to listen to them both breathe. "So I am hiding. You can hide with me if you want." Because, certainly, she would never hide from him.
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Posted: Sat May 31, 2014 11:22 pm
"You don't ever have to smile just to make me or anyone happy. ********, I never ********' smile, even if I am happy." Otto murmured, able to remain relatively calm just to try and be Cami's rock. So many friends in his time here had been his. Picked him up, dusted him off, patted his head and sent him back out. He could now do the same. He could help others. He could open up enough to allow it. "Hide all you want. I'll keep you safe." If he could keep her safe, in turn, maybe he too would feel the same. Through their bonding over Twitter drama, comforting one another as they raged, he'd felt it. That helping someone else made his own pain dimmer. His heart beat rapidly. Her pain was his own. "They don't matter. Forget them. I wanna understand you, so it don't matter if they never try, okay? I need you just as much as you need me." And oh how good it felt to be needed. Loved. He'd worried he'd never have it. He worried he'd jumped in too fast, so desperate to feel that love again that he'd been careless. But he didn't care. Someone like her was rare on this island. He cradled her closer, "Don't smile. If you're sad, just cry. It's okay to cry."
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Posted: Sun Jun 01, 2014 1:14 am
No, he never did smile and more and more she was staring to think that it was okay to not too either if she didn't feel like it. It was unlikely almost to the point of impossible that she wouldn't smile as much a she had before, that Otto was dooming himself to a best friend who became suddenly less bubbly and golden as she had always been, but there could be moments now. Moments when it was okay for her to be a little less bubbly than usual, where she could unearth the things that hurt her and work through them rather than bury them deep until they 'went away'. They never went away and no matter how many times she tried to bury them, no matter where she hid them, Camille could always find them. But Otto said it was okay. He'd keep her safe from whatever unearthed itself and it was the only time in her memory someone had said that. That someone had not only seen that the cracks under the smile but hadn't been afraid of helping keep them from getting bigger. He wanted to understand, he needed her, and it was the most wonderful thing in the world. Laughter trembled on her lips. "No, you don't smile, but that's okay. I think I smile more than enough for both of us. Most of the time." Puzzle pieces were falling into place, a few of them. It wasn't all of the pieces, not by a long shot, and it didn't explain half of her problems nor did she think she understood him so fully. Not yet. But he was willing to be there, willing to try, willing to accept and that was so much more than Camille had even bothered to hope for when she was nothing more than a lonely teenager in her island bungalow. Maybe, just maybe, her mother was wrong. Arms were as tight as she dared around Otto, head nestled into his shoulder in their blanket cocoon as she spoke very, very quietly. Almost so quiet that he might be able to say he never heard her and it was as brave as she could be. Camille Ryland was a coward, not a brave girl, but she was going to try. Because he was important to her. "I know...I know you lost someone important. I didn't know before but I know now and I just want to tell you: I'm here too." Her voice grew a bit stronger, more sure of itself, because this was something for which she had quite a lot of conviction. "Whatever you need me for. If you never want to talk about it. If you do. If you're sad or lonely or angry or happy or just plain want me around I'm always gonna be here for you." She smiled once, not as bright as usual, but genuine in its desire to be warm and reassuring. "I don't think I want to cry anymore but, just in case, can we stay here a little bit longer? It's nice." Nice to feel so very safe for once in a very, very long time. She didn't even notice that it was actually dark under the blankets because, really, she wasn't alone. And for a soft moment even Kidana reached out to remind Cami that she didn't have to be alone ever, ever again. Maybe she didn't want to cry but that didn't stop quiet tears from slipping down her cheeks to wet poor Otto's shirt but these were a different kind and they were very, very good. Bittiface Enjoy the tag it took me two hours to write because of feels.
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Posted: Sun Jun 01, 2014 9:40 am
That was all he could hope for. His friends usually understood, the closer they got. It wasn't that he was never happy, it was just that smiling wasn't how he expressed such an emotion. He felt it, deep inside. It came out in other ways, other than smiling or laughing. He did those too, but they were rare lapses in his armour. He may not smile, but he did have happiness in his life. It was how he could keep on going. "Havin' a friend like you... it makes me feel strong." He cradled her close, despite the tears. He ran fingers through her rich locks of shortened hair, wanting with all his heart to make her feel loved and wanted. She was his friend. "I did lose someone very special to me. And all I wanted to do was bury myself and never let people in. But yanno.. none of my friends were havin' any of it. Then a month later I meet some silly girl who tried to convince me to see a doctor for a made up disease. Who knew she'd end up being so important." He wouldn't leave or let go, not as long as she needed him there. They could hide away in their blanket cave. Let the world think they were lovers or whatever else their narrow minded wickedness allowed them to think. He knew what they were; the best of friends, who clicked so well so fast it could only be destiny. "The closer I get to people, the more I'm scared they'll get taken away. I wanted so bad to cut them out and be alone. But.. I can't live like that. I wanted to, and I tried. I really, really tried. I wanted to convince myself I could live without someone's love and warmth, and without friends. But that kind of life? It ain't livin'. Life is pain, and misery.. but having friends who care is what makes it bearable." He had so many friends now, and he'd never be able to thank them all properly. "I won't hide myself from the world anymore, and it's cause I got someone like you keepin' me from drownin'." nesshime woefpwjegpwgj Y ARE U SO CUTE
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Posted: Sun Jun 01, 2014 2:24 pm
Camille didn't know what she'd done to get to this point in her life where she was almost directly star-crossed with the best friend she could have ever hoped for but she was so thankful for it. Would continue being thankful for it. In a strange way she was now thankful for the fact that she'd fallen into the Sahara titan, had been infested, been burned alive. Without all of that she wouldn't have even thought of something as ridiculous as d**k centipedes and wouldn't have been so genuinely afraid for Otto. Wouldn't have ever interacted with him at all! So she actually laughed when he mentioned the made-up disease, the laughter just a little bit too loud for their confined cave. "Hey, d**k centipedes turned out to be one of the best things that ever happened to you!" Because without it there would be no Cami in his life and, goodness gracious, that would have been a tragedy! Sincerely meant! Thinking of Otto alone in his big room without anyone to bring life to it, just him kicking around all that space by himself, almost physically hurt. Certainly her heart constricted in her chest at the very thought of him trying to shove everyone out -- she didn't doubt he could do it if he tried hard enough. She could even understand why he'd tell himself he wanted it, why it was preferable because losing someone was an ache that you could never prepare for, almost never got over. But you could soften the edges and try to lighten the burden of it which was something Cami knew she was going to be doing as long as Otto would let her. Just as he was going to do for her. Pushing a finger lightly against his chest Cami smiled again, because she was so happy to have him, so happy that he was going to understand and encourage her, and scolded lightly. "You can't hide from me, Otto Graves. I'm going to be the best best friend the world's ever seen. I'm gonna make you happy, even if your face is grumpy I'll know you're happy, and we're going to be there for each other. Forever. No drowning, no hiding." She hesitated and grinned, the smiles becoming wider and more normal by the minute. "Unless we want to hide from everyone else. We can do that as long as it's both of us. Deal?" She held up her pinkie-finger in a gesture anyone who had ever watched a single anime would recognize: pinkie swear.
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Posted: Sun Jun 01, 2014 4:04 pm
There, he'd made her laugh. He wasn't really any good at being funny, or bringing joy. But somehow, he'd made her laugh. "Best thing?" Otto retorted, cringing at the mere thought of anything like that near his... well. "Okay fine you were worth it, but gross." She couldn't truly promise forever. But for the remaining time they had together, however long or short it might be. That much he could promise. He made some small huff of amusement, clasping his pinky finger to hers. A pinky swear. "Deal." nesshime Wrap? Moar rp after of course fouof
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