((This took place before Das Gift.))

The harsh bite of winter had finally begun to retire. There were no more threats of snow days; instead, the ground was covered in a wet sheen of rain. Green buds had begun to return to the bare branches of trees. Before long, everything would burst forth with color. Even the sun felt brighter, warmer. And Renna Maddox was somewhere she hadn’t been in awhile: Baltimore, MD.

The BoltBus rattled over the pothole-ridden streets, flashing past condemned apartment buildings and sprawling fields of dead grass. She leaned forward, resting her forehead against the cool window. West Baltimore gave Renna mixed feelings. When her family first came to the States, they had lived there in a cramped, filthy apartment. It had taken years for her mother and aunt to save up enough money to move to a nicer place on the other side of town. She couldn’t help but put herself into the shoes of the little black girls who walked alongside their mothers, arms laden with bags from the grocery store. That had been her as a child. And Eden.

Her heart still hurt to think of her dead cousin, and it burned in her chest: a dark secret she could never share. Like her, he was a Negaverse agent. Unlike her, he was talented: a General-King. A General-King who had died at the hands of a senshi. It was the truth that had finally given her some semblance of peace with his missing person status; and it was that exact relief she would never be able to give to her mother or aunt.

When the bus finally whined to a stop, Renna shuffled past the other passengers, slipping her water bottle back into her purse. A mass of people huddled at the side of the hulking orange bus to get their luggage. She got stuck behind an older couple. It occurred to her that she should perhaps push past them -- wasn’t that what a true Negaverse agent would do? Wouldn’t they be fierce and driven at all times?

No, no, Renna chided herself. Serving the Negaverse did not mean cruelty, especially toward civilians.

This trip to Baltimore was long overdue. It had been a year since she saw her mother. Her 18th birthday had come and gone, which made living separately from her family a lot simpler. She was no longer a minor in the eyes of the government or her landlord. Unfortunately, her mother had become increasingly needy. She was no longer accepting “school is very difficult” as an excuse for not visiting. But what else could Renna say? She couldn’t very well tell her mother that she was part of a secret society of crime fighters who didn’t precisely accept vacation time.

And yet, that was exactly what they had done. After yet another argument over Skype, Renna’s mother began threatening to come down to Destiny City... and stay. Not only would that seriously cause issues in Renna’s life, but she also didn’t want her mom to live in such a dangerous place, even if she was part of the reason it was so dangerous. It had taken a lot of clearance from her superiors. In the end, she had a weekend free to pretend that her life was still as normal as it was the day she left Baltimore in the first place.

Her mother was too busy cooking to come pick her up so Renna hopped on the free city bus and then walked the last few blocks up to the rowhouse her mother shared with her aunt. The ran a small seamstress business and had already converted Renna’s empty bedroom to a work space. This put Renna at ease; it seemed like they might actually let her stay in Destiny City for good.

The Maddox home was two floors, plus a sundeck out back that overlooked their microscopic backyard. Before her grandfather passed, he had hoped to build a deck on the roof for the family. All that remained of his plan were stacks of unused 2X4s rotting at the side of the house. The front of the house was a faux-stone finish covering the much cheaper siding. The door had recently been painted a fresh green, which was an interesting change of pace from the dingy brown it had been previously.

Just as Renna lifted her arm to knock, the door swung open. Her aunt stood in the doorway wearing a white apron stained with butter and a smear of red-orange. Her closely cropped hair had been dyed red, and her lipstick matched it. “Renna girl,” she said quickly, her South African accent drenching her words. Two thick arms wrapped around Renna. “Too skinny, girl. You don’t feed yourself in the big city, do you? No problem, we’ll feed you.” She steered Renna into the house and quickly shut the door.

Her twin cousins, Beni and Ami, were sitting on the couch playing Call of Duty. Beni grunted with annoyance when Renna crossed in front of the TV. When his mother followed behind her, the preteen whined out, “Moooooom, come on! Ami is going to beat me!”

Beside him, Ami cackled, her pigtails bouncing. “Do what you want, Mom. I’m going to beat him anyway.” Still she leaned hard to the right to try and see around Renna’s aunt.

But Renna’s aunt did not move. “Say hello to your cousin. She doesn’t come around much, you lazy things,” she snapped.

“Hi, Renna,” they said in unison, not looking away from the television.

Taking the opportunity, Renna gave them a quick wave and then disappeared down toward the kitchen. She could hear her mother clacking pans and utensils around in front of her, and behind her, she heard her aunt continuing to chide her kids for not being friendly enough. Renna didn’t mind. Beni and Ami were cool; they’d talk to her later. Frankly, she still resented sometimes being forced to socialize with them as if they were the same age. She was at HITS for college. They were in middle school. It was like being on different planets.

Her bag skidded to a stop just outside the doorway to the kitchen. From the open doorway, she saw her mother sprinkling powdered mustard and Old Bay into the base of the black steaming pan with white speckles. Renna smiled. “Aye, mama, you know how to make a girl long for home,” she said.

Her mother turned, immediately setting down the spices and rushing over to hug her daughter. Tears were already filling her eyes. “My beautiful girl! Oh, you’re no girl. You look the part of a woman,” she said, hugging Renna once more. It was true that Renna had intentionally dressed maturely. She knew she had to reassure her mother that living in Destiny City away from the family was both safe and good for her future. Renna needed her mother to stop seeking out visits and making demands of her time. She just hadn’t necessarily put together how she was going to do that just yet.

Once her mother had properly hugged her to infinity, Renna stepped further into the kitchen. There was a cooler on the floor by the oven. She crossed to it and squatted down, removing the styrofoam lid with a squeak. Instead, packed between chunks of ice, were three dozen of Renna’s favorite food in the world: Maryland blue crabs. Their green and blue claws twitched with excruciating slowness. The ice numbed them and made them docile. Docile enough to toss into a pan to be steamed alive. True, it was not the most humane of meals, but Renna didn’t bother herself over the specifics.

“You really are turning on the charm, ay, mama?” Renna said, tapping on the shell of a crab. “The crab they serve in Destiny City is all watery king crab legs. They don’t even put Old Bay on it.”

Her mother snorted as she went back to the stove, placing the top half of the pan on and turning up the heat. “If you came back here, I would make you crabs every day,” she said. Renna opened her mouth and then closed it again. Her mom broke the silence: “Alright, bring those crabs over here.”

They took turns digging into the styrofoam box with tongs and hands to drop the slow-moving crabs into the pot. Once instead, their tiny claws scratched against the side of the pan, a tiny chorus in the kitchen. Renna’s mom poured her a glass of sweet tea and they took a seat at the table. Renna regaled her mother with stories of school and city life, and her mother countered with all the things Renna was missing out on in Baltimore. It was two conversations at once: one, about the topic, and the other, each trying to convince the other about where Renna should live.

“Horizon Institute is an exclusive school. I’m lucky to go there.”

“Your little cousins will need someone to teach them to drive, you know.”

“In the city, I’m really learning more about being independent.”

“It can get so lonely here without you.”

Once the crabs stopped scraping the side of the pot, Renna’s mother got up to check on them. Beni and Ami were upstairs on the deck with their mother, covering the picnic table with newspaper and laying out crab claw crackers, knives, and tiny cups of melted butter. Renna took on the job of carrying the tray of steaming crabs from the kitchen to the sundeck. Everyone let out a collective murmur of excitement.

A chorus of hammers snapping bright red shells filled the backyard. Her aunt sipped on a beer, her mother water, the kids had sweet tea, including Renna. As the meal was winding down, Renna had managed to forget all about the things that wore on her heart: the Negaverse and the lies she had to weave to protect that part of herself. She allowed herself to be transported back to her former self: the girl who hung out with family all day, laughed without care, didn’t work out... period.

Then her aunt set down her glass. “Renna, I have read some troubling things about your Destiny City in the newspaper,” she said. Renna’s mother clicked her tongue, but her aunt ignored her. “No, let me just say it -- I know you are at some fancy school and you are 18. But you can’t stay there. The gang violence there is worse than anyone we dealt with in West Baltimore. What good is your fancy education if you are dead?” Something hitched in her voice, and Renna knew immediately that she was thinking of Eden -- lost Eden, presumed dead. Eden, whom Renna knew was dead but couldn’t say.

Renna turned to her mother. “You think this too?” she said.

Her mother stiffened, then nodded. “At first, I was so excited about the school, I was. And I know you have been fine so far. But your aunt and I... we read the news. We see the things they say. Hasn’t this family lost enough already? I can’t...” Her voice cracked. Suddenly, both her aunt and mother were crying. Her aunt reached across the table to take her mother’s hand.

Her aunt was the one who found her voice. “Your mother doesn’t sleep well. She wakes up with nightmares. She convinces herself you have had something terrible happen. And so she calls.”

“And I’m fine,” Renna interjected. It was true that her mother and aunt called constantly. Renna didn’t mind chatting with them, but it had certainly become excessive.

The table shifted. Beni was wiping his hands clean on a napkin and reaching for his cellphone. Ami pretended to be deeply involved in the crab she was eating, but it was obvious she was trying to eavesdrop. Her aunt continued, “I know that you are fine so far. But that doesn’t stop the worry. Your mother will never stop being nervous about you as long as you live in that place. Now that you have that school on your resume, why can’t you transfer to a good school up here? We could have you back, you could be safe, you could still get your education. Life is so short, girl, and we shouldn’t spend it in pain.” She gave Renna’s mother’s hand a squeeze.

Renna took a deep breath. Gently, she sat down the crab claw that was pinched between her fingers. She knew before she came here that this would be a trap for her, but she had allowed herself to hope otherwise. On the bus, she ran through a hundred different scenarios for how she would handle this. Other Negaverse agents had even given her advice. Scare them off. Lie to them. Pretend you’re pregnant if that will make them disown you. Claim that you are in love. Vow that you hate the place where you are from. Threaten them. Kill them. Make them hate you. Make them so afraid of losing you that they cave. Not one person had given the response that she truly wanted: tell them the truth.

Her fingers were sticky and wet from picking apart the crab shells. She unfurled a napkin and began to slowly strip bits of slick white meat and grains of Old Bay from under her nails. “I love you both,” she said first. Her mother let out a relieved cry and wrapped her arms around Renna, staining the arm of the messy t-shirt she changed into in preparation for the meal.

But Renna stiffened, gently easing her mother away from her. “I love you, but...” she began, leveling them with a serious look.

"I have to live my life for me. If you try to keep me close or bring me down, you will push me away." Her voice was stiff, harsh. It would have to be. "You want me to live the life that you have -- but I don’t want to be a seamstress. I don't want to live in Baltimore and spend weekends babysitting relatives. I want more than that. And the only place that can give me that is Destiny City and Horizon Institute."

Her mother's eyes widened in annoyance. She began to open her mouth, but Renna couldn't let that happen. She had to hurt her, she had to hurt them both.

"Eden was pushed away by this. You lost him because of this need to force us to stay close. Are you really going to push me away to? Because if you try to push this issue, I will disappear just like him and you will never see me again." The words were like sandpaper on her tongue.

Everything happened fast then. Her mother burst into sobs, as did her aunt. The table was left dirty, and everyone went to their rooms, leaving it to rot. Later, when everyone else was asleep in their sadness, Renna went out to clean it alone under the moon. She had booked a new bus ticket for the morning.

So much for family.

A tear slid down her cheek. Renna promised herself that, one day, she would make this up to them. One day, she would make them understand why this had all been so necessary. Until then, she would stay separated -- a bud snipped clean from its twig.