Sukanya was curled up on her own, like she often was now days, staring out at the savannah with a sorrowful expression. What was she even doing anymore? Makosa was gone, even Dysi had found someone! She was simply on her own, wandering for no purpose, and wandering was now hurting her lungs more than she would like to admit. She coughed heavily at night, most likely giving away her position to any who was wondering around nearby. It was lucky she was not dead yet! Truly!
It was time, she supposed. Time to make a decision about her future. Makosa and Tega were happily mated, settled in a pride that protected them. Dysi had found someone to love him, even if she feared his heart was still not healed from the heartbreak it had gone through. Was there a reason for her to still be wandering? Maybe it was time for her to stop.
Her decision made, the dark leopardess rose to her feet, moving out into the darkness that surrounded her. The cold hair hitting her lungs made her cough so hard her eyes watered. It took a moment before she could catch her breath again, her eyes clearing.
She set out into the darkness, with one place in the back of her mind. It took her a few days to make her way there, but sure enough, the male she searched for was there, playing with a male pink fluffball that could only have been his newest offspring. Why did Dysi get so many cubs to love? She couldn’t help but think, almost bitterly.
“Sukanya!” Dysi called out, his eyes lighting up at the sight of his old friend. Her bitterness faded slightly, seeing his joy. The young cub turned towards her, the smile on his face fading slightly, but coming back in full force when he saw his father’s joy.
“Dysi,” she called back, and couldn’t help the tears which came to her eyes almost instantly. Even across the distance which still remained, Dysi saw them. Dysi always saw her pain.
“Suki,” he gasped, and crossed the distance, unknowing that his young son followed him. “Suki, what’s wrong?”
“I’m so tired, Dysi,” Sukanya couldn’t help but reply, her ears drooped and her posture stooped. She was tired of this, of everything. “What can I do now, Dysi? What is my purpose anymore?”
“Oh Suki, is this still about Makosa?” Dysi asked, rubbing his chin against the top of her head. “HE’s happy, he’s safe –“
Suki cut over him this time. “I know he is, but why aren’t I?” She demanded. “I have given EVERYTHING to EVERYBODY and now I am TIRED, but where is my happy ending? Dysi I walked for DAYS to get here, and not a single person spoke to me. I cannot find a friendly face anymore, and I am tired, and what am I even doing anymore?”
Dysi looked stunned at his friend’s outburst. “Oh Suki,” He cuddled her close, unable to stop himself from drawing his closest and oldest friend to him. “I am so sorry. I should have been here for you, I cannot believe that I have left you by yourself for so long.” He felt horrible. Sukanya had been there for him through a lot of the most horrible parts of his life, and he knew she was sad, damn it he knew! And he still left her!
“It was not your place to fix me this time, Sissy,” Sukanya whispered. “I Thought I could fix me, but I hurt and I’m tired, and I just don’t know.”
“We’ll figure it out,” Dysi promised her firmly. “We will. I will not abandon you again.”
Kilua, the young cub who had been watching quietly, as he often did, wiggled between his father and the darker female. The two adults glanced down at him, and he stared up at Sukanya with a deep seriousness in his face. She held her breath, waiting for the ball of pink fluff (so much like Dysi, and yet not at all) to speak whatever words of wisdom had popped into his young mind.
He took a deep breath, before confessing, “you’re pretty.” Sukanya blinked for a moment, and then began to laugh. A deep, belly shaking laugh that vibrated her body, and that sound set Dysi off as well. The adults began to laugh together, smiling down at the cub fondly.
“Oh Lua,” Dysi gasped. The young boy was so feminine in his colouring, but Dysi had been shocked to discover that – really – he was just like all the other boys. A bit rough and tumble, and a bit too ready to jump into muddy puddles. It was…so strange for Dysi but he had come to love his sons just as he had come to love his daughters.
“Thank you little one,” Sukanya told him gently, brushing the beginning of his mane back from his face. “I needed a compliment.”
Kilua smiled softly, a strangely old look on his face. “I know,” he responded, before flopping against her fur with a slightly petulant expression. “I’m tired too. We should nap.”
Dysi chuckled again. “Good idea, Lua, why don’t you take Sukanya back to the den and I’ll rustle us up some berries as a snack, before Maleficar gets back.”
“I don’t want to intrude,” Sukanya began to excuse herself, feeling weird about interrupting the family home, and especially if Maleficar would be there. She had never met the other female, but she felt odd about it, she’d heard stories from Dysi and the two females had very different personality. She didn’t want to upset Dysi.
“Come on!” Kilua interrupted Sukanya without hesitation. “I’m tired, remember? Stop arguing,” he huffed. Rising to his feet, he flicked his father with his tail before wandering back towards the den.
“He’s very stubborn,” Sukanya remarked, rising to her paws slowly.
“I blame his mother,” Dysi responded instantly, but cracked a cheeky smile at Sukanya. He placed his paw over hers. “I mean it, Suki, we will figure this out. You are not alone, and you never will be. I swear to you.”
“You can’t make that promise, Dysi, but thank you for trying,” she responded, before setting off after Kilua. The young male had been staring her down from not too far away, impatiently waiting for her to hurry up.
She felt better being back near Dysi, but still, her tiredness was yet to fade. It probably never would.
