Welcome to Gaia! ::

I'm not very good with words but I'd just like to say that time heals almost everything. Give it time and focus on the more positive things in life. I think that deep down, you already know all the answers to the questions you are asking but are afraid to come to terms with them. Good luck and I hope that you feel better.

The biggest thing I can tell you is that no matter what, if someone offers to be there for you, allow them to be. There really is no way you could be a burden. I've spent most of my life(though still young) befriending and being there for many. As a person who has gone through some hard times I can tell you these things.

1. Having at least one friend who you can vent to, online or irl is crucial. It is not healthy for you to keep it all locked up because it will build up and you will lash out at someone or yourself.

2. Keep a journal of all that is bothering you, it's a way to give relief to yourself and allow yourself to take a breath and examine the issues.

3. A good place to put anger and frustration into is multiple pillows line them up enough where you can punch them but not hurt yourself. Maybe even just pound your bed in the center.

4. I also have a hard time letting people go, i still haven't found a way to cope with that, I usually turn to music and believe that somethings just happen for a reason people come and go and that's life.

5. Meditation and inspirational videos help with motivation, setting goals for your life and writing them down in present tense (i.e. I am making better choices) I have found to help a lot.

6. To stop distancing yourself from people is on you, life is about taking chances, if someone offers a kind hand in friendship fight any doubt you have and give them benefit of the doubt. I know it's tough, but it's worth it. Some will be worth it, others will betray you. The best thing to do and realize they just aren't worth it.

I think I covered anything. and hey, if you ever need anything I'm always an open ear. Feel free to add me ^-^ happy to help anyway I can

Well, before I try to answer your questions, I should say that it's commendable how self-aware you are. Many people will go fall into vicious cycles and never accept or even realize the idea that they have a problem with their lifestyle in any way, and end up damaging themselves and others to a point where the backlash hurts harder than the initial problems. Being aware of your cognitive-behavioral functions (but more importantly, the dysfunctions) is one of the keys to bringing yourself to a state of peace and harmony.

1. This is a three part process: A) Avoid narcissistic or attention-seeking emotions. These cause the need to "flaunt" yourself on the internet. B) Don't resort to checking social media or the internet to relieve boredom. Instead, the next time you have free time, try practicing a skill you enjoy, or flood your senses with the awesome stimuli of movies, games, or music. In short, try something you haven't done before. C) Don't concern yourself with the possibility of missed notifications or messages. You check it often enough, you'll see them. And even if you didn't click it the moment it appeared, it'll be there waiting for you next time you check it. And maybe if you wait longer, you'll have even more notifications and messages. Doesn't it just feel great when you get a whole bunch of them at one time?
2. Know why you're distancing yourself, first of all. Do you wish to wall yourself off because you're distressed? Or does it have to do with the individuals themselves? If it's the former, you really need to be cognizant of the idea that you are being overprotective of your emotional well-being because of your past experiences, not because of what you're afraid to experience. If these people are your friends, they are certainly not your enemies. You don't have to hide from them internally, you know that. Just get in touch with them, and be honest with how you feel when you're spending time with them. If it has to do with the individuals, however, you don't have to feel bad at all about breaking the chain. It's important that you do so. All it takes is a single message: "You are not healthy for me to have in my life right now. Please don't contact me again." If the individual wants to keep you as a friend, they may protest. You should respond with whatever feels appropriate. If they truly respect you, they will be understanding of your wishes. You can still come back to them when you feel ready, because they are worth keeping around.
3. Realize that every small thing you do that contributes to your overall success as a human being is part of your entire career. I know what I'd like to do after college, but that's not an option right now. At this time, working towards bettering my future is something as simple as doing my chemistry homework. Washing dishes, doing the laundry, brushing your teeth, showering, putting clothes on, making improvements to your living space, tuning your vehicle, all of these things are tiny little segments of reaching your overall goal for how you want to make a living and be happy doing it. Sticking to a functional daily routine also helps turn these tasks into an autonomous process.
4. You don't. The percentage that you cared about them slowly trickles away, but I don't think it ever truly reaches 0%. Everyone you still think about who's no longer in your life has touched you in some way or another, and emotional impacts are the hardest things to forget. Having them in your memories is not something you can control at this point, those experiences are in the past. Don't regret that you ever got involved with them. Just try to think of the good qualities in people rather than how they hurt you. If you can only think of their malicious or abrasive qualities, you have to try to forgive them for what they've done to you. Furthermore, you must not only forgive them, but love them as well. I know that sounds kind of crazy, and it is no doubt difficult to do, but the idea behind it will make more sense after you read this. Believe me, forgiving those who've hurt you, even if it's a thought you keep to yourself in your heart, will put the memories that haunt you to rest.