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[Q] Ada Donohue - Lt. Rosasite (ready/crits please!)

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chiickadee

Princess Hoarder

PostPosted: Thu Feb 06, 2014 8:19 pm


Name: Adelaide Marie Donohue

Nickname: Ada

Age: 23

Birthday: September 4

Sign: Virgo

Gemstone: Sapphire

Blood Type: O

Fav. Food: Take-out Chinese

Hated Food: Avacados. Too many jokes about her name. The word "adacado" still haunts her.

School: Citizen. Ada graduated from DCU with a major in economics. Currently working on a masters as well. She works at the firm where Zia got fired from as an assistant. So basically she took Zia's job when she was fired. You snooze you lose.

Hobbies:

Work: Though it's a bit strange for a hobby, Ada actually performs work even outside the office. She likes double checking things, running tests again, proof-reading everything three times. It might sound a bit perfectionist, but she actually just likes numbers enough that even outside of work she finds herself ... working. Even if she has to occupy her mind with a sudoku puzzle, she enjoys any fragment of work she has to do. It makes her a very efficient person, but also a slightly tired one.

Card Games: When she isn't working, Ada is a rampant gambler. She adores any sort of card game, even if it's not played for money. Probability is a huge component of card games, and with how invested she is in math, it's only an advantage for her. It's a really nice contrast to all of her work in that it's a bit looser, a bit less frigid. She doesn't like slots or lottery tickets or any of that flimflam (she believes it's all simply rigged anyways), but card games amongst friends are something she loves because the game is relatively different every time. She doesn't like Yugioh or Magic or any cards that aren't like a normal deck of cards- if you asked her, she wouldn't even know what those things were. If you're not careful, she might bilk you out of a few dollars though.

Yoga: Being that she's incredibly controlled, Ada practices yoga to relieve her tensions and stress. With all of the working and activity going on in her mind, it helps ease all of the tensions that come with working so hard. She actually teaches the occasional yoga class as a side job, but not very often and not horribly professionally. She likes stretching herself out after a long day at work.

Virtues:

Resolute: Ada has a very strict sense of wrong and right. She is resolute in each decision she makes, sure of each flick of her pinkie. This doesn't necessarily mean her moral code is a righteous one. Her moral compass leans far closer to anarchy than most, but the point still stands that she is a strong decision maker. She stands behind the choices she makes, and will defend them voraciously. It doesn't necessarily make her stubborn, as stubbornness implies an unwillingness to change; she's welcome to changing the plan at any time, so long as it still remains a plan that she decided on. Things that would make her change her mind include logical deductions and reason; she follows whatever is most beneficial to herself. While this isn't entirely virtuous, her virtue lies in her decision making abilities and her concrete determination.

Industrious: If you couldn't guess by her hobbies, Ada is a hardworker. She always finishes what she begins, never ceasing to outdo herself. She is a mild perfectionist, and feels uneasy if she isn't working or being productive- it's very rare to see her slouching around. Of course, like every human she gets tired and overworked, but overall Ada enjoys being on top of her game.

Farsighted: Accompanied with her industrious attitude, Ada has a knack for planning. She hardly ever does anything unless she thinks it through- there's a plan for everything! She tries to see the consequences of actions in advance, preferring foresight to acting hastily. It makes for occasionally second-guessing herself, but overall she simply seeks to use her mind over her gut.

Flaws:

Stingy: Ada isn't thrifty, to say the least. She has expensive tastes, and doesn't mind spending a pretty shibboleth on herself. The problem is that she doesn't like spending on other people. She's incredibly parsimonious with not only money, but her possessions and her time. Ada has a major problem with giving selflessly- to her, everything has a price tag. Her entire scope of vision is very egocentric and it makes it hard to see past her own needs and wants.

Opportunistic: Everything is a stepladder to a place where the grass is greener. Ada will, unfortunately, use every opportunity she's given to rise in the ranks of whatever she's doing. Like stated above, her moral code isn't the most righteous device; it's slightly tilted because she uses others' downfalls to her advantage. It doesn't mean she lacks a heart- she still loves and feels pity, but if something is to her advantage she will use it. Whether that means co-workers that are behind on their sales, or a sales clerk that accidentally returned to much change, Ada will always choose the path that is most advantageous to her.

Sanctimonious: Following in suit, Ada believes that she is destined for greater things. Since she's always striving to be one rung higher on the ladder, there's a definite complex with her thinking she's higher up on the ladder than others. She recognizes superiority in officiated positions (such as boss, parent, nega-General, etc.) and is obedient to that hierarchy, but for her peers she believes she is somehow better. It isn't so blatant that she walks in the room and declares herself queen, but rather it comes out through subtle nuances in the way she talks to certain individuals.

PHYSICAL DESCRIPTION

Just gonna casually link this before you read the rest: bim bamity bop reference.

Eyes: A light seafoam color.

Hair: A tight updo that hardly ever comes undone. It is a light blueish green color. It is swirled on the sides of her hair, and clipped up in the back with a straight clip. When it's down, it curls something like General-Queen Laurelite's~

Face: Caught somewhere between being mature and being babyfaced. She has a tiny beauty mark below her left eye. She also has chronic bitchy resting face.

Clothes: Office clothes. Inspiration: 1 2 3 4. She likes empire waist pencil skirts a lot.
PostPosted: Thu Feb 06, 2014 8:20 pm


Negaverse Alias: Lieutenant Rosasite

Challenge: I don't have time for this.

Uniform:

Again, linking this for ease

Top -- This bad boy of a coat.
Bottoms -- Slim, leg-tight pants that are fitted into her boots.
Gloves -- Simple black riding gloves
Belt -- no belt~
Shoes -- Heeled boots in appropriate, matching colors. They are slightly pointed, but not aggressively so.
Shoulders -- none yet~
Accessories -- a line of blue roses on the back of her head, like so: xxx

Weapon

First Stage: An incredibly scary fairy princess wand. Use any of these as inspiration. Should thematically involve flowers, but can also just be a crown or something. IDC have fun.

Second Stage: A dagger with a rose hilt- something that is like a shortened/dagger version of the final stage (see below).

Final Stage: This sword, aptly colored to her color scheme. It's is thinner, so it's lighter and more nimble in her hands. The trade-off is that each blow doesn't inflict much damage compared to say a greatsword or a cleaver. But hey, it's still a sword!

chiickadee

Princess Hoarder


Kaori_luv

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PostPosted: Mon Feb 10, 2014 7:28 am


chimarii


Hey Chimarii,

Kao her to do your critique and get your girly stamped. She is quite lovely, the concept art is beautiful!

Civilian:

Hobbies-
For card games, I am just curious as to weather she would play something like yugioh or magic the gathering. It says all card games, but reads more like it would be exclusive to spades, poker, black jack and games like that.

Virtues-
For principled, it talks a lot about how she is a strong decision maker, but her decision making needs to relate more to her sense of right and wrong. Right now it reads more like she is resolute.

Flaws-
Rapacious reads less greedy and more self centered of stingy. I would suggest changing the name or tying the flaw more towards greed.

Santimonious is basically saying she kind of high and mighty in her attitudes, very holier than though, but in a somewhat subtle way?

Her powered side looks just fine to me! Just fix those things and your good for a stamp!
PostPosted: Mon Feb 10, 2014 1:44 pm


Kaori_luv
chimarii


Hey Chimarii,

Kao her to do your critique and get your girly stamped. She is quite lovely, the concept art is beautiful!

Civilian:

Hobbies-
For card games, I am just curious as to weather she would play something like yugioh or magic the gathering. It says all card games, but reads more like it would be exclusive to spades, poker, black jack and games like that.

Virtues-
For principled, it talks a lot about how she is a strong decision maker, but her decision making needs to relate more to her sense of right and wrong. Right now it reads more like she is resolute.

Flaws-
Rapacious reads less greedy and more self centered of stingy. I would suggest changing the name or tying the flaw more towards greed.

Santimonious is basically saying she kind of high and mighty in her attitudes, very holier than though, but in a somewhat subtle way?

Her powered side looks just fine to me! Just fix those things and your good for a stamp!


Er, yeah card games meant poker and blackjack and the like. I thought that was kind of given considering her age and occupation, but ill wsit that in!

And i will edit the virtue/flaw titles when i get home

And yeah ... Thats what sanctimonious means so XD by subtle i just meant that shes not brazen about her superiority. She doesnt run around telling people they aren't as ~amazing~ as her, but she does it in subtle ways. Like if a coworker made 20 sales that day, she would casually pipe up that she's made 30. Its sort of like being a one-upper, but in that its concerned with her mindset, not so much her actions. I hope that makes sense.

chiickadee

Princess Hoarder


chiickadee

Princess Hoarder

PostPosted: Tue Feb 11, 2014 12:36 am


Kaori_luv


i believe they're all fixed <3
PostPosted: Thu Feb 13, 2014 8:52 am


chimarii


The changes you made look great. I just have one question/revision for resolute and then your good for a stamp!

Are you trying to say the while Ada might not have the best/ strickest/ straight and narrow moral code, she sticks to it and follows it no matter what? If so could you reword it to that effect. If not the bits about the moral code clutter the virtue up a bit and are not really needed.

Quote me back when you are finished.

Kaori_luv

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chiickadee

Princess Hoarder

PostPosted: Thu Feb 13, 2014 11:19 am


Kaori_luv
chimarii


The changes you made look great. I just have one question/revision for resolute and then your good for a stamp!

Are you trying to say the while Ada might not have the best/ strickest/ straight and narrow moral code, she sticks to it and follows it no matter what? If so could you reword it to that effect. If not the bits about the moral code clutter the virtue up a bit and are not really needed.

Quote me back when you are finished.


Er ... Im sorry but i believe the quest form already states that. And i quote:

"Her moral compass leans far closer to anarchy than most, but the point still stands that she is a strong decision maker. She stands behind the choices she makes, and will defend them voraciously."

In other words, exactly what you just stated. She has a moral code that doesnt point absolute north but she sticks to it. I wont claim that she "stands by it no matter what" because that would be too extreme. Most people arent so stubborn that they arent willing to change their mind. I dont want to say rosasite wont change her mind, because i dont believe that to be true to her character or the human mind in general.

Apologies, but i hope you can stamp it as is. If you need further clarification, please let me know.
PostPosted: Mon Feb 24, 2014 8:44 am


chimarii


So, I don't think I explained that right, no I dont want you to use the absolute "no matter what". I just wanted you to reword it so it was more clear. I think what I'm tripping over more than anything is where you say her that doesnt mean her moral code is just one. Also since you changed he virtue to resolute but you say she's willing to change her mind, try to note what it would take to change her mind, since a resolute person generally would be stubborn, but you say she not, which is fine, just note what it takes to change her mind. I'm not try to change her at all, she is lovely, I'm just trying to make sure the virtue is totally clear.

Quote me back when your ready, or if you would rather you can aim me for clarifications. My aim is Shizu6616.

Kaori_luv

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chiickadee

Princess Hoarder

PostPosted: Wed Feb 26, 2014 9:49 pm


Kaori_luv


I've made the aforementioned changes.
PostPosted: Thu Feb 27, 2014 7:15 am


chimarii


The changes you made look good! Congrats on winning the concept contest and have fun playing her!

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Kaori_luv

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