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3, 2, 1

Bated breath, a sea of faces smiling and parted for him on one knee. Looking at her. Waiting..

Bix woke up on the sofa, Ceres curled up next to him. He was staring at his own hand dumbly, it was extended slightly, open as if waiting for something to be placed in it... or perhaps waiting to give something.

Junior. Ferdinand Bolinsky Jr.

Bix sat up as his heart flurried in panic. A father. It was his father. A dead man who's name he'd inherited. Junior had known his face, but it was gone now, swept away with his consciousness and the awakening of Bix. Dissolved away in a whitish blur, like water swirling down a drain. The memories of life, childhood, island society just disappeared and left him with that version of himself- a stoic and intense version of himself.

Bix pushed off the sofa. They'd been waiting for midnight hadn't they? Small glasses of soda sat out on the table and had lost their bubbles overnight. He and Ceres had decided to stay in for new years and must have fallen asleep.

It had just been a dream.

He stood and stretched, hand slipping into his pocket to find a slip of paper that he didn't remember. The momentary relief, that it was all some fantastical dream, turned into a moment of panic and then followed by a dull throbbing pain in his chest. It had been more than that. 'What might have been'

He fell into his desk chair, glancing at his family portrait. Why did the faces hold such little meaning now? The little brother who he barely remembered, the step-father who now seemed stranger than ever. He knew now... knew he was a Junior because his real father had been a hunter. That the mysterious letter that Cael withheld from him was from his father. The face of the Moon Division lead, John, flashed in his memory. Scarred yet warm. Guiding him with a steady and friendly hand. A family on the island.

The concept was bizarre and Bix pressed his hands to his eyes as if they'd help him pull up the past of Junior, the memories, anything. He replayed what he remembered from the beginning of the dream to the end.

His father's jacket, Uncle John, Marcus being an a**, Julie and her owl clip, Ceres looking beautiful, nervousness, down on one knee, 'Will you marry me?'

He'd almost forgotten his girlfriend was on the couch behind him.

He heard his name, Bix (not Ferdinand or Junior), and his brain had to make the connection briefly. It was like one of those intense dreams that carry over into waking up.. except this one didn't have robots or super heroes. Where you wake up mad at whoever was in the dream or you wake up loving the person next to you because moments before they'd rescued you from a super villain.

But this one had been so real...

And his heart had been pounding and his emotions swelling. His palms had been sweaty and clutching that ring box and she'd looked so surprised and happy and his own bated breath....

And now Ceres (the real one) was talking to him and he had to snap out of it and get back with the real world. It was like trying to remember how you're supposed to act.

"Me too.." He turned with a smile. "And we missed midnight." Bix held up the piece of paper he'd found in his pocket. "And I found this weird paper too. But it was like ummm.. Wizard of Oz." And then put on his best Dorothy Gale. Almost as if he was putting himself as far from the personality of Ferdinand as he could. "And you were there.. and you were there and you were there too Toto!" He chirped, coming over to join her on the couch again before his gleeful expression softened to a more serious one.

"I don't know." Bix sagged slightly. "What ever it was," it was clear by how she was talking that they'd had the same dream. It wouldn't be the first time a shared 'vision' had taken the whole island (if that was the case, he couldn't know yet), "he was as much me as Ixb was in that other.. fog.. thing."

It was easier to think they weren't real or meaningful. Ixb had the freedom from memory, teaching Bix that they were only a burden. Ferdinand had his father and even if it was only to shape his future, he had him. He had a life on the island that was somewhat normal and operational.

Was the stoic and distant version of him really better than who he was? Should he be jealous that there were families on the island and children? That the town was whole and bustling? That he had a father figure in John who he could actually relate to?

The worst bit of it was, Bix thought to himself, that he could truly feel that Ferdinand was him. That stuttering nervousness with pleasing Ceres, the teasing of Mina that got him so flustered...

They were like ussss.. She made her presence known with an unnerved hiss. ..when we firssst met. Yess?
Bix affirmed it wordlessly. Almost nothing could ruffle Mina's feathers.

"He wasn't me. I mean.." Bix looked at her with lifted brows. "So quiet and serious."

"And he was a better hunter. But not as good with the feelings." Bix smirked wryly, finding it odd to be that way. He also found it strange that knowing his real father had made him that way. His arm slid around Ceres back when she shifted closer. His head leaned on hers comfortably.

After a silence his body hitched in a stifled laugh. "Should I grow a goatee?"

"I'll scratch you with it.." He teased and rubbed his chin a bit on her forehead as if the goatee where there right now. "How about your hair?" With the length she had it now, he didn't need to reach up very far to play with the ends of it. "It was like a free haircut preview. But I think I like it long." Of course he did. He liked all long hair.

Another silence stretched as he lapsed into thought. The dream still clung heavily to him, impossible to simply shake off. "So.. what was she going to say?" He asked softly.