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 Posted: Fri Jan 03, 2014 11:08 pm
Delete. I am unable to post at the rate needed for a Vice-Captain. In which cause for the guild it would be better for someone else to have the position.
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Posted: Sun Jan 12, 2014 3:56 pm
xxxxxxPERSONAL INFORMATION▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃ ▃▃▃ ▃▃▃▃
xxxxxxZANPAKUTO DETAILS▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃ ▃▃▃ ▃▃▃▃
**I'll be reviewing the Shikai and Bankai separately
SHIKAI
My major issue with the Shikai is that you've essentially doubled the maximum abilities by making there three phases with two abilities each. Please chose one ability for each of the weapons unless Onin has approved this structure. I will be reviewing both attacks if you have gotten the okay for six Shikai abilities from the guild Captain.
Weapon One:
Attack One
Seventy five feet is too great of a maximum distance for a Shikai attack, please reduce it to a maximum of fifty feet.
Attack Two
Furthermore, please either lengthen the cool down of the shield or make the spell blocking Vice-Captain ranked spells or lower.
Weapon Two:
Attack One
"Blood boil" refers to angering, correct? Literally boiling someone's blood is too OP. Second, when you say "those around her" is that the same distance as the blood boiling attack?
Attack Two
The second ability is just way too OP; blowing off limbs is way too much for a Shikai attack. Lessen the strength of the explosion.
Weapon Three:
Attack One
It's too much for a Shikai attack to be able to break another character's weapon as well as do damage AND heal your character. Maybe one of those three effects would make the attack less godmoddy. Furthermore, "so quick its hard to even see" makes the attack even more over powered. All of these things in combination make the last sentence of this attack, that it cannot be parried, even more ludicrous.
Attack Two
This is a lot too much over powered. A decay attack and power boost is too much for a Shikai attack, not to mention the fact that there is additionally a fog that makes it difficult to see.
All in all, these attacks all seem way too overpowered. Some of these abilities would even be overpowered in a Bankai, even more so in a Shikai. I like how it's like in Castlevania with that glyph system, but I would say only have one attack per weapon. If you were to ask me which attacks to keep, I would say the first attack on weapon one with a reduced distance, the first attack of the second weapon with specified changes, and a less godmoddy version of either of the third weapon abilities.
xxxxxxSHINIGAMI ABILITIES▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃ ▃▃▃ ▃▃▃▃
Please specify a weakness in at least one of the skills other than Kido; you can't really be this good at everything... right now her skills sound more like those of a Captain than a Vice-Captain.
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Posted: Sun Jan 12, 2014 6:45 pm
Thank you. I think I make the correct changes.
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Posted: Sun Jan 12, 2014 7:26 pm
Everything looks good ^^ I will move it to the approved profiles thread.
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