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 Posted: Wed Jan 01, 2014 3:40 pm
I'm 18, and would really love a Godly husband. People say I'm young and I agree, but there's this strong desire in my heart to fall in love.
My mother has stage 4 cancer and for most of my life she has been my main source of companionship. I didn't have friends and wasn't close to family most of my life, so I spent most of my time with her. No one else.
I feel when she goes I will be so very lonely since we have always been together.
It said in the bible that God sent Rebecca to Issac so he wouldn't be as lonely after his mother died. (I hope I didn't misinterperate that verse).
Please pray God sends me my companionship.
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Posted: Fri Jan 10, 2014 9:20 pm
First off, I'm so sorry to hear about your mother. I've never met you face to face, but I so wish I could send you a hug and lots of delicious cookies through my computer monitor.
Though my mother is alive and healthy, I can relate to your dilemma. Growing up I didn't make a lot of friends other than my immediate family (my mother and two siblings). I was always very shy, and had great difficulty - especially from the eighth grade on up - accepting friendship. For me it was both a combination of shyness and distrust of others that I wouldn't allow myself to open up to those around me who sincerely wanted to be my friends.
Even now, though it's much better than it once was, I still don't have any friends that are my own age that I can meet in real life. (I do have some amazing friends online, but I don't have anybody in my area that I can just go and hang out with).
I will certainly pray for you that God will send you someone, whether it be a husband or just a really good friend, whatever his will may be.
Also, if you ever need someone to pray with you, or if you just need an ear to listen, you can talk to me. I hope that doesn't sound creepy coming from a stranger. DX I sometimes never know how the things I say will sound to other people.
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Posted: Thu Jan 16, 2014 8:18 pm
Jewelies First off, I'm so sorry to hear about your mother. I've never met you face to face, but I so wish I could send you a hug and lots of delicious cookies through my computer monitor. Though my mother is alive and healthy, I can relate to your dilemma. Growing up I didn't make a lot of friends other than my immediate family (my mother and two siblings). I was always very shy, and had great difficulty - especially from the eighth grade on up - accepting friendship. For me it was both a combination of shyness and distrust of others that I wouldn't allow myself to open up to those around me who sincerely wanted to be my friends. Even now, though it's much better than it once was, I still don't have any friends that are my own age that I can meet in real life. (I do have some amazing friends online, but I don't have anybody in my area that I can just go and hang out with). I will certainly pray for you that God will send you someone, whether it be a husband or just a really good friend, whatever his will may be. Also, if you ever need someone to pray with you, or if you just need an ear to listen, you can talk to me. I hope that doesn't sound creepy coming from a stranger. DX I sometimes never know how the things I say will sound to other people. Thank you so much. That is very sweet and not creepy smile
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Posted: Sun Jan 19, 2014 11:12 am
It sounds more like there are some underlining issues that you are trying to use a husband as a way of not facing those issues. A husband isn't going to make everything better, he isn't a band aid. Don't let your emotions make you rush into something you aren't ready for. I suggest you get some counseling first due to the grief you are and will be going through before making such decisions. Find someone in the church that can counsel you and go from there. If you were to marry before dealing with this stuff then that relationship will start off rocky. Also, you already have a groom and you are never alone. BTW, it never says that in scripture.
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Posted: Sun Jan 19, 2014 7:14 pm
My friend wishes to reply due to her personal experience in this subject. Since she is not a member of this guild I am copying and pasting her reply for you. If you wish she says that you can pm her. "I want to say that I've been on both sides of this spectrum. The young woman wanting a man and now the young woman who had a man who left her.... I thought I had the man who loved God. He prayed, on his own and with me, and we went to church every Sunday. Marriage/a mate is not going to be your saving grace. Right now, your mother is fighting a terribly hard battle, you don't need me to say this to know it's true, but I want you to see that it's important that you focus on your heart and healing. Any man to come into your life during this grievous time will be a band-aid to your pain. And one day, that band-aid will wear off and it will not be easy to face your grief. Taking your time to deal with what's in front of you now will ultimately be the BEST thing you could do for yourself! You know who should be your husband? God! Isaiah 54:5 "indeed, your husband is your Maker-- His name is Yahweh of Hosts-- and the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer; He is called the God of all the earth." You must first and foremost fall in love with Christ. He is ALL the man you will EVER need. Don't discount the amazing power of diving into the word of God and losing yourself in him... That's what we are called to do, to deny ourselves and to follow God. Our focus as Christians, at ALL times, should be on Christ.. Our prayers shouldn't be so selfish as to ask for something to make us feel better! The prayers of our hearts should be like this "God, help me overcome myself so that I can serve you better!" God will provide for all your needs if you let him. You will have all that you want because Christ is enough for you. Everything I just said boils down to those 2 sentences... there are no if, and, or but's about it. I don't say it to be hard or mean. I understand your desire to love and be loved... we are all designed with that need and God is the only one who can truly fill it. No mate, no child, no job, no home, no adventure could EVER come close to it. My prayer for you is that you seek God with your whole heart. That your love for Him will exceed all else so that your joy may overflow from every part of you. That you are a light for Christ to shine through you and to bring others close to Him. I want your life to be blessed by the freedom to serve God how ever He may call you!" - faithful quenga
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Posted: Mon Jan 20, 2014 11:59 pm
I don't think she's looking for a band-aid. She just wants to meet her partner like most of us do. And I can understand because I was there. People seem to think 18 is young to be looking for someone to marry but dating is not. Dating is the point of finding someone to marry. And if it's not then you're just dating someone for company/sex/whatever. She genuinely wants to fall in love and however long her mother is with her shouldn't effect when it should happen. We don't know if her mother still has several years or her doctor gave her a countdown to expect. Either way there's nothing wrong with desiring to find your soul mate. I met m husband when I was 20 and I was looking for him before that age.
JLP are you currently doing anything to be open for you and your mate to find each other? Sometimes Christians have a way of waiting without looking and God placing them at their doorstep. But personally I think a bit of effort is expected of us in order to be blessed with what God has for us. When I wanted to find my husband I didn't have many options. No friends who knew people, never went to high school so I didn't have a network of people available and there's nothing to do in my home town that would give me a place to meet people. I just had church and There wasn't a big group of young adults available. Not to mention I'm very shy. So when I saw a commercial for Christianmingle.com I ran to my computer and made an account. I finally had a place to level the playing field for someone that can't just walk up to people and conversate. And within a week I met Stephen and the rest is history. Online dating isn't for everybody but what I mean to say is if you want to make yourself available to men put yourself out there somewhere. Go bowling with someone and their friends or maybe look for events to meet new people. It might increase your chances. Even letting your relatives keep their eyes peeled for you could help. I hope whatever you do you find the one God made for you. I don't know how I would have made it through the last 3 years without him when I found out my dad died or needed someone to encourage me when I was down about jobs or family.
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Posted: Wed Jan 22, 2014 8:11 am
A-B0T
I don't think she's looking for a band-aid. She just wants to meet her partner like most of us do. And I can understand because I was there. People seem to think 18 is young to be looking for someone to marry but dating is not. Dating is the point of finding someone to marry. And if it's not then you're just dating someone for company/sex/whatever. She genuinely wants to fall in love and however long her mother is with her shouldn't effect when it should happen. We don't know if her mother still has several years or her doctor gave her a countdown to expect. Either way there's nothing wrong with desiring to find your soul mate. I met m husband when I was 20 and I was looking for him before that age.
JLP are you currently doing anything to be open for you and your mate to find each other? Sometimes Christians have a way of waiting without looking and God placing them at their doorstep. But personally I think a bit of effort is expected of us in order to be blessed with what God has for us. When I wanted to find my husband I didn't have many options. No friends who knew people, never went to high school so I didn't have a network of people available and there's nothing to do in my home town that would give me a place to meet people. I just had church and There wasn't a big group of young adults available. Not to mention I'm very shy. So when I saw a commercial for Christianmingle.com I ran to my computer and made an account. I finally had a place to level the playing field for someone that can't just walk up to people and conversate. And within a week I met Stephen and the rest is history. Online dating isn't for everybody but what I mean to say is if you want to make yourself available to men put yourself out there somewhere. Go bowling with someone and their friends or maybe look for events to meet new people. It might increase your chances. Even letting your relatives keep their eyes peeled for you could help. I hope whatever you do you find the one God made for you. I don't know how I would have made it through the last 3 years without him when I found out my dad died or needed someone to encourage me when I was down about jobs or family.
There isn't such a thing as a soul mate is not Biblically based, in fact it's from paganism. Please read my thread "The SINGLE greatest lie" for more information.
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Posted: Wed Jan 22, 2014 8:23 am
I read all your replies and they were truly helpful.
My mother just passed away two weeks ago. I am now focusing on church but still, my strongest desire is to find "the one." Please pray I may be patient enough to wait for God's match for me, however long or short that waiting period is for.
I crave male affection and want my partner in life.
My therapist had told me to start looking for a boyfriend, so I look around at all the single men I could be interested in, and am just seeing if any are God's match for me. I think one may be interested, but still, only Father God knows, so I'm trying to play it safe.
I understand in my heart I need to put God first. Please pray that I am able to. I just want to share my life with somebody who loves the Lord and has a kind heart.
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Posted: Thu Jan 23, 2014 6:22 am
emorhconom esor A-B0T
I don't think she's looking for a band-aid. She just wants to meet her partner like most of us do. And I can understand because I was there. People seem to think 18 is young to be looking for someone to marry but dating is not. Dating is the point of finding someone to marry. And if it's not then you're just dating someone for company/sex/whatever. She genuinely wants to fall in love and however long her mother is with her shouldn't effect when it should happen. We don't know if her mother still has several years or her doctor gave her a countdown to expect. Either way there's nothing wrong with desiring to find your soul mate. I met m husband when I was 20 and I was looking for him before that age.
JLP are you currently doing anything to be open for you and your mate to find each other? Sometimes Christians have a way of waiting without looking and God placing them at their doorstep. But personally I think a bit of effort is expected of us in order to be blessed with what God has for us. When I wanted to find my husband I didn't have many options. No friends who knew people, never went to high school so I didn't have a network of people available and there's nothing to do in my home town that would give me a place to meet people. I just had church and There wasn't a big group of young adults available. Not to mention I'm very shy. So when I saw a commercial for Christianmingle.com I ran to my computer and made an account. I finally had a place to level the playing field for someone that can't just walk up to people and conversate. And within a week I met Stephen and the rest is history. Online dating isn't for everybody but what I mean to say is if you want to make yourself available to men put yourself out there somewhere. Go bowling with someone and their friends or maybe look for events to meet new people. It might increase your chances. Even letting your relatives keep their eyes peeled for you could help. I hope whatever you do you find the one God made for you. I don't know how I would have made it through the last 3 years without him when I found out my dad died or needed someone to encourage me when I was down about jobs or family.
There isn't such a thing as a soul mate is not Biblically based, in fact it's from paganism. Please read my thread "The SINGLE greatest lie" for more information.
It's just a word I use ok. You don't have to take it literally. I also use words like karma and luck for convenience but that doesn't mean I believe the universe controls itself or anything like that.
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Posted: Thu Jan 23, 2014 8:12 am
A-B0T emorhconom esor A-B0T
I don't think she's looking for a band-aid. She just wants to meet her partner like most of us do. And I can understand because I was there. People seem to think 18 is young to be looking for someone to marry but dating is not. Dating is the point of finding someone to marry. And if it's not then you're just dating someone for company/sex/whatever. She genuinely wants to fall in love and however long her mother is with her shouldn't effect when it should happen. We don't know if her mother still has several years or her doctor gave her a countdown to expect. Either way there's nothing wrong with desiring to find your soul mate. I met m husband when I was 20 and I was looking for him before that age.
JLP are you currently doing anything to be open for you and your mate to find each other? Sometimes Christians have a way of waiting without looking and God placing them at their doorstep. But personally I think a bit of effort is expected of us in order to be blessed with what God has for us. When I wanted to find my husband I didn't have many options. No friends who knew people, never went to high school so I didn't have a network of people available and there's nothing to do in my home town that would give me a place to meet people. I just had church and There wasn't a big group of young adults available. Not to mention I'm very shy. So when I saw a commercial for Christianmingle.com I ran to my computer and made an account. I finally had a place to level the playing field for someone that can't just walk up to people and conversate. And within a week I met Stephen and the rest is history. Online dating isn't for everybody but what I mean to say is if you want to make yourself available to men put yourself out there somewhere. Go bowling with someone and their friends or maybe look for events to meet new people. It might increase your chances. Even letting your relatives keep their eyes peeled for you could help. I hope whatever you do you find the one God made for you. I don't know how I would have made it through the last 3 years without him when I found out my dad died or needed someone to encourage me when I was down about jobs or family.
There isn't such a thing as a soul mate is not Biblically based, in fact it's from paganism. Please read my thread "The SINGLE greatest lie" for more information.
It's just a word I use ok. You don't have to take it literally. I also use words like karma and luck for convenience but that doesn't mean I believe the universe controls itself or anything like that.
I didn't mean the word, the concept itself is pagan. The idea that God made someone for everyone is false. When stating such stuff you are saying what other people have said and haven't tested it with scripture. This leads to false teachers, false prophets, and false doctrines. The punishments for such things are immense and you are too precious to go through such things.
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Posted: Fri Jan 24, 2014 3:57 pm
I will pray that you will have companionship, but you should recognize the fact that God may not plan for you to marry. Scripture even says that is some cases, staying single (and therefore more devoted to God) is better. Of course, God knows each of our hearts, so He will deliver what is best.
I don't mean that you should stop looking or even praying for a mate, but you should definitely keep soul searching for yourself. Think about all the aspects that come with marriage (I have been married for almost 8 years), not just the good and loving parts, but also the bad parts too.
I will pray for you that you will be happy.
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Posted: Fri Jan 24, 2014 4:33 pm
I'll pray for God's will to be done. :3
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