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 Posted: Thu Dec 12, 2013 10:10 pm
This is a private RP between me, XxXPandamoniumXxX, and Tirokio. Do not post without our permission Teepee's: XxXPandamoniumXxX | Tirokio 
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Posted: Thu Dec 12, 2013 10:13 pm
The sun was so bright in the mare’s eyes that she had trouble seeing what was in front of her. Even if it was the wide-open plains, she wanted to see if there were any butterflies around and it was so blinding for her to see anything. So she trotted blindly over to a big oak tree loving the shade it provided because now she could actually see something and that made her a little more giddy then she already was. She looked around slowly seeing the short and tall grass sweeping from side to side from the cool breeze sweeping past. She didn’t see any butterflies though and assumed it was far too cold for them to be out, which made her a little sad. Her father told her they wouldn’t be around until the spring, but the spring-time was so far away and she couldn’t wait for that.
“Maybe I can find myself a butterfly?” She didn’t even know where she was going to start and she was always so optimistic about things like this. She never gave up and never backed down unless it really was hopeless. She had always been this way for as long as she could remember. Even before her fathers Hania Shen and Enitan adopted her, she was always this playful. She didn’t see anything wrong with it and honestly didn’t really care. She was who she was and would never change for anyone.
Flicking her tail, she ventured out from under the shade and was happy she didn’t suffer from temporary blindness from the sun. She was always this adventurous and hadn’t been able to get out as much lately with her family continuing to grow the way it was. She didn’t even spend that much time at home because of how crazy it had been getting. She didn’t want to be a part of the craziness and enjoyed the simper things in life. She still believed she was created from the butterflies just because she never knew her parents or where she came from. She only remembered waking up in a field of butterflies. It was where her belief came from that she was created from butterflies. That was where her obsession started.
“Oooooo rabbit!” She shouted as she bolted after the bunny that came into her line of sight. She didn’t run for it however. No, she was unique and tried hopping exactly like it even if she looked like a giant goof ball. She frowned when the rabbit completely disappeared into the long grass and she stopped her hopping.
Now she was bored again with nothing to do unless something else came about that caught her eye. After all, her attention span was like that of a gnat. Tirokio Let me know if her color is too bright for you.
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Posted: Fri Dec 13, 2013 7:03 am
Another season had passed successfully as the warm, near scalding rays of the sun had slowly begun to chill in preparation for an upcoming fall and winter season. The leaves had yet to change, but he could feel it in the way the wind currents had shifted and begun to bring down air from the northern mountains. Well, during the times he was awake that is...right now the stallion had taken a bit of a cat nap under a tree near the edges of an outcropping of trees in the vast, open plains. He hadn't taken much thought to conceal himself, not on a warm day like today, so his big brown body stuck out slightly from the green of the long grass which gave away to a shorter variety the closer one got to the trees.
It was lucky too that no one had fallen upon him by chance, or they would have seen what a wreak he was.
Amongst his slumber induced pain ran fresh, painful tears down his softly frowning face. Even in the world of unconsciousness he couldn't get away from what he'd done, it was simply in this world, what he did had the ability to come alive and haunt his every thought. He could see them, his beautiful mother's face painted with agony, the brother he'd lost all those years ago Alessio, his brotherly partner in crime Ahmzi, the demonic laughter of his older sister...Georgia.....and of course the cold, motionless body of his father. Blood stained the ground he lay on, dripping from his own hooves and splattered on his once clean brown coat. Reliving the moment had always been surreal, as if the fog his life had become lifted to display the gates of his own worst nightmare. Yet....at the time he'd done it he felt nothing but joy...success...his sister, who had raised him would be so proud! So....so.....deceitful. Everything she'd said...about his father had been lies. Lies he ate up like the little leech he was and he'd foolishly with all his heart believed every twisted word which came out of her mouth the moment she'd come into his life that night and stole him away. Yet....all of it, all the years of being under his sister's hooves vanished when he'd looked up from the corpse of his father and into his mother's eyes. It was those eyes which haunted him the most...the pain, the longing, the love, the blame....not for him....for herself.
"I....I'm sorry..." He muttered in his sleep, his voice cracking in both emotion and his foggy state, and his his dream self turned and ran from the scene leaving nothing but teardrops and bloody hoof prints; Abraxas found himself awake once more with a start.
"Damnit..." He hissed, lifting his head before trying to rub some of the salty tears from his face onto his folded legs. He just couldn't sleep without having these dreams, sometimes varied, but all as painful as the last. Slowly lifting himself from the ground he let out a sigh, it would probably be best at this point to find a stream so he could freshen his face up; not that his messy mane made him looked any more attractive than tear stained face. With ears folded back he moved out from under the tree's shade, sure he'd seen some kind of body of water around here somewhere - completely unaware of the proximity he was to one vibrant female.
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Posted: Fri Dec 13, 2013 9:52 am
Nothing seemed to be catching her eye and it was irritating her a little bit. She was even thinking of going back to her family where she could find a little more amusement then what she was getting right now, but she risked the probability of not playing at all. Her family didn’t really play and she was really the only one that liked to have fun. Well maybe that was a bit of a lie. Her father Enitan was a little more playful then Hania and that was good. Then she occasionally played with whatever foals were around, but now everyone was grown up again. She even told her fathers to have more kids one time just so she could have someone to play with and it made Hania think about having more kids. It didn’t mean it was going to happen, but her just knowing he was thinking about it made her happy.
Perking her ears up, she looked around as she walked spotting a small stream in the distance and thinking maybe she should stop to have a drink for a moment. That all changed when she spotted a weary looking stallion walking in the same direction as her not that far away. Being who she was, she never believed in that no talking to strangers bull crap and liked talking to pretty much anyone. Hell she even talked to a kalona before that clearly wanted to eat her, but that didn’t phase her one bit. “Hello!” She shouted at the stallion before making her way over to him. She didn’t really know what personal space was or when others wanted to be alone. Unless she was told otherwise, that was the only way she was going to back down. “You look like your upset…are you alright? Do you need someone to talk or play with?” She grinned the widest grin imaginable as she walked slowly at his side.
She had the hardest time making friends because of her peppy nature. They didn’t want to be bothered with her and she was overly optimistic too, which was hard to find anymore. “I didn’t think I was going to find anyone around here today…But good thing I came across you! So what are you doing?” She asked flicking her tail behind herself. She didn’t know anything about this stallion, but was talking to him as if they had been friends for a while now. “Oh my name is Strawberry Panic, but you can call me Strawberry.” She told him feeling a little giddy meeting someone else for once. It had been a long time since she saw a new face and she was going to try not to scare him away as much as she could.
“Do you have a name?” She saw the stream was getting closer and closer to the two of them making her smile. “I’m thirsty!” She trotted over to the stream lowering her head to take a drink even though the inner child in her wanted to splash and roll around in it.
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Posted: Sun Dec 15, 2013 8:38 am
Stepping out into the longer grass he felt a little at ease as the swaying motion against his legs brought on by the chilled breeze tickled at his legs...small joys he'd not since remembered since the early days of his childhood. They were blurred, time and his sister's doing had eroded many happy memories he'd known in the short time he spent with his true family. While it may have been fleeting...it was really the only happiness he'd remembered feeling in his lifetime.
His ears immediately perked up as a loud, boisterous voice filled the silence of the meadow. Turning his head he was quickly met with the sight of what looked like a white, black and pink mare making her way quickly towards him. What was she doing? Immediately he felt his body shift and take a step back, knowing she didn't know the dangers she could face...but who would....he looked like any other normal stallion. "I uhh.." Deep tones struggled to find the words he was looking for...he'd never had any interaction outside his family before, it was just him and his brother under Georgia's care for so long. However, she did hit the nail on the head right away...he was upset; Abraxas was always upset though.
Before he could find any words to say though she kept going...going as if they hadn't just met. Strawberry....He'd caught her name at least, but found his legs moving slowly as he tried his best to even just keep up to her verbal speed....till well, they reached what he'd set out to find in the first place. Stopping in his tracks he watched the peculiar mare head to the stream to take a drink, letting everything she'd said sink in finally. Should he maybe feed her false info? Save her from knowing too much about him till he knew he was a 'better' stallion? No....he wasn't a very good liar, he knew that much about himself anyways. Perhaps though...she'd just get bored with him - he imagined he didn't make very exciting company; especially with how he'd been a leech his entire life - not anything worthwhile other than the traits he'd stolen from others.
"Abraxas." He'd stated, before correcting himself as his eyes fell to his hooves. "My name...that is. I wasn't really doing anything, just trying to find something I never really had." Oi...now that was depressing. Folding his ears against his hair he looked back up to her, wondering if this was what other soquili were like out here in the big wide world. Happy...carefree....kind of like how his mother was. "Do you...live around here, Strawberry...?"
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Posted: Mon Dec 16, 2013 4:46 pm
This stallion was an odd one and probably was one of the few that intrigued her. She could tell something was troubling him, but she was never one to pry or force it out of them. She would wait until they wanted to tell her or wait until she felt the need to ask. He didn’t seem happy and maybe that was because of something in his past. She never ever met anyone that didn’t at least smile and this stallion was the exception to that. She didn’t know what she could do to make him happy let alone smile, but she didn’t like anyone staying in this kind of state. It wasn’t good for his health and the health of others that would speak to him. “I live deep in the forest with my adoptive family. They are wonderful and so kind to take me in even though I don’t look like any of them.” She said smiling her usually wide grin.
She wanted to know what it was he was trying to find. Was it something he had lost? Was it something that was taken from him? She didn’t kno, but this only made her even more curious. “It’s nice to meet you. I haven’t had a friend in a very long time or at least someone that took the time to speak with me.” She nodded looking down at the water taking in her reflection a little bit. She never really felt like she belonged anywhere except for the family she was part of now. They treated her like she was one of their own and it was something she would never ever forget.
“So what is it your looking for? Maybe I can help you find it. I may not be good at certain things, but adventuring and finding things I am good at.” She nodded a bunch of times before stopping. She was overly energetic and the more she stood around the more she wanted to just run really fast across the field. She didn’t know how she was going to help him or if she was going to be able to. It was worth a try though, right?
“So what should we do? I want to cheer you up. You seem a little down or upset about something. I know I’m a stranger, but if you want to say what’s on your mind I am here to listen.” She told him in a soft caring voice. She wanted to help as much as she could and it wasn’t like she was doing anything anyway. “Oh then maybe later we can catch butterflies or watch the fireflies at night.” She grinned hoping there was something she could do to lighten his mood.
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Posted: Fri Dec 20, 2013 3:37 pm
"Adoptive?" Abraxas might have said a little too quickly before finding his cheeks go a little red, it was a term he'd never heard before....did that mean she had no parents? No...that couldn't be right, or else she wouldn't have been born; he knew about the birds and the bees and what happened between mares and stallions....but adopt.....he'd heard of such a thing. The stallion supposed though, that family was family....unless they were the devil's offspring like Georgia. "I mean....that's nice....that they're nice. They sound like good souls." Very smooth, Abraxas....very smooth. Yet who could blame him....social skills were near the bottom of his list, but he was trying right?
It...was nice to meet him? He? Without thinking he looked behind him just to make double sure she wasn't perhaps hallucinating and talking to the other imaginary stallion beside him. When he noticed that no, it was in fact him he looked back just in time to see her look into her reflection with a hint of what he could only describe as perhaps forlorn. Immediately he felt a little silly not knowing what to say, and it took him a little bit to find his words as he stood in silence; still not allowing himself the momentum to walk over to the stream as well. "I find it hard to believe. You seem like a really nice...person. I thought others flocked to those who are nice..." He paused, unsure if he wanted to say anything....but he did anyways. "I've never had a friend. So at least you're doing better than I am."
Slowly, very slowly, he found his hooves moving towards the stream as well; all the while listening to what she had to say. What he was looking for....well that was simple, in a sense. He was looking for the person he was always meant to be, instead of the leech he grew up to become. He wanted to be someone his mother could be proud of....not the stallion who'd ripped out a piece of her heart and left it laying in his own blood. He wanted to get the blood off his hooves....even if he wasn't sure how it was possible since the physical blood was gone but he could still see it. As the stallion looked down at his reflection he felt his body jolt; seeing an image of his father in his stead and quickly closed his eyes before dipping down and taking a sip. Damnit....not now. He didn't want to break down in front of her! Once he was done though, he took a step back before opening his eyes once more; looking her way.
"I'm....not entirely sure. I guess i'm looking for myself....trying to find who i'm supposed to be." Abraxas confessed, but found himself perking up slightly at her offers. He wasn't sure he wanted to say anything, he was sure if he did she would run off for fear of the monster that lurked under the facade of a normal stallion. Call him selfish, but he didn't want to hear any more screams....or have this company leave so soon. "Cheer me....up..?" No one had ever well....cared like that, outside of his family. With his head tilting down a little sheepishly he thrummed with the idea in his head a bit. "Well....i've never seen fireflies before..." He offered, but if that was all the way in the evening like she said...what could they do to bide the time till the evening came?
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Posted: Sun Dec 22, 2013 9:02 am
She knew Hania and Enitan weren’t her real parents, but the thought made her a little sad. She would never know her mother or her father and never know if she had siblings she could have played with. “Yes..I never knew my mother or father. All I know is when I emerged from my basket I was in a meadow surrounded by butterflies. I don’t even know what they look like.” She said in a slightly sad tone. She really wished she could have experienced some time with them at least even if they didn’t want her, they could have at least shared one moment with her. “They are nice because if I didn’t have them then I wouldn’t have any family at all or at least a family to go home to every night.” She nodded to him and really hoped one day she could meet with her blood parents even though Hania told her it could be a bad idea.
“You never had a friend?” This was something the mare could not believe. How could someone not have a friend? How could they really be that alone? She never understood that. Even the loneliest people were allowed to have friends or get a friend. “Well if you want I can be your friend. It must get lonely not have a friend or something to talk to.” She grinned looking at him as he drank feeling like she should help this stallion in some way. Even if she was his friend just for this day, it would make her happy to know he was a little less lonely for one moment in his whole life. She spoke of friendship like she had a million friends, but truthfully her only friends were family. She didn’t have the attention span for anyone else or they couldn’t keep up with her so she took it as it were. She didn’t get sad about it or become depressed like most would, but instead kept as optimistic as she possibly could.
She didn’t know how she could help him in finding out who he was and maybe she was taking on a bigger challenge then she would have liked at the moment. “I don’t know if I can help you find yourself…but if you let me I can try to help you? In a way I haven’t fully found myself either. I kind of have, but I don’t really know where I belong or what I’m suppose to do with my life.” She told him lightly feeling a little sadness sweep over her. She rarely became sad over anything except when she spoke of things like this. It only made her think and to her thinking was a bad thing. “Yes I will cheer you up somehow. I just have to think of what I will do.” She smiled and didn’t know what they could do until nightfall at first until it dawned on her. “Since we are waiting for night..why don’t we talk for a good while? I don’t really want to do much traveling because well this spot around here is the best area to see fireflies.” She smiled once more looking around for things that weren’t there.
With a small flick of her tail, she moved a little closer to him and looked into his eyes. There was something sad about his life. Something in his eyes told her that something happened to him and it wasn’t the most pleasant thing. “If you don’t want to I understand. I don’t normally talk and just..you know…explore and stuff so I’m fine with that as long as we come back here before night fall.” She told the stallion moving away from him, but only a little bit. It was kind of comforting being around someone else at the moment even if he was a stranger. “Oh and Abra..” She giggled a little bit at the nickname and hoped he didn’t mind it. “You aren’t going to scare me away.” She said lightly to him still smiling widely before turning away and walking further away from him to explore the wide open land.
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Posted: Thu Jan 02, 2014 12:32 pm
Abandoned....that's what she was, more or less. Either that or something happened to her parents, but either possibility wasn't a significantly greater outcome than the last. A part of him almost wished he'd been abandoned somewhere by Georgia, but that wasn't part of her plan till he'd succeeded; then he'd been dropped like a bag of dead carcasses. When she wasn't looking he found himself gazing to her with sadness in his eyes...which his childhood had been awful, he'd known love, he'd known his parents. Although it seemed her adoptive parents were the best thing that happened to her, there was just something about knowing where you legitimately came from that burned in the souls of many. "Family isn't always about blood...its about who loves you. That's really the most important thing..." He had family who didn't love him or really any other of her kin, so Abraxas at least could speak from experience.
Shaking his head a little, it wasn't really that he probably couldn't make friends, no...he was sure if he tried he could. "No, I didn't. My brother and I were hidden away, you could say. We didn't see other foals, but we had one another. I wasn't really lonely then, so I never thought anything of it - to be honest." Yet....when she spoke he felt a little thud of his heart, looking at her as if she'd proclaimed the sun was rainbow colored or something obsurd like that. "You....would really want to?" No.... she didn't know. He couldn't risk it with her, what if Georgia's constant brainwashing kicked in...what if he went and atta- no. No he wouldn't let it. Abraxas would throw himself off a cliff if he ever got into that mindset again. Shaking his head profusely to get such thoughts out of his head he felt himself began to mutter quickly. "No....Friends are great, but not everyone is fit to be a friend. You shouldn't risk yourself, Berry, some soquili aren't what meets the eye and I wouldn't want you to get hurt..."
Was it really her he was worried about, or was it him?
However, spending time with others occasionally wouldn't hurt....she seemed very nice, and Abraxas was enjoying himself. "B-but I mean...hanging out never hurt anyone. Even if you can't help....I am feeling better..." That was important too, he'd never really had 'fun' for a long, long time...and this was as close as he'd gotten. When she moved closer he felt his eyes widen in surprise, wondering what was going on in her head till she spoke of talking...or maybe just exploring around this area. He didn't mind either, although he was sure he wouldn't be able to talk too much without revealing things he wasn't quite ready to share...but as his brain ticked to think about it his ears perked at the sound of....a nickname? Abra? He wasn't against it...but he was so used to his full name he knew it would take a little getting used to. Yet....her light words next drew him into a stupor, feeling a bit of the color drain from his face.
How did she...? His eyes darted down to the ground while following, slowly his tail swayed as his mind raced a mile a minute. She may have said so...but would she be able to live by those words if she truly knew the dark truth?
"Berry...." Abraxas said perhaps a little too quietly, "...have you ever seen...a monster?"
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Posted: Sat Jan 04, 2014 8:02 pm
The stallion was definitely right. Family was always about who loved you. They could be blood related and never even love you, which was something she didn’t understand. How could a child hate their parents or vice-versa? It just seemed so crazy in her eyes. “You are right. I’m very happy they took me in instead of just leaving me to fend for myself with no family at all. It would have probably led me to a darker place I think.” She didn’t know how she could be a dark hearted individual because she was so optimistic and peppy, but anything was possible. That is what she believed anyway.
She heard what he had said and felt a little sad by his words. He didn’t want to be friends with her? What was so bad about being friends? Was she a bad friend? She didn’t want to force friendship on him, but she also didn’t want to give up. She never gave up with anything and she wasn’t about to start now. “So…you don’t think your worth a friendship or that I don’t deserve to be friends with you?” She asked him a little puzzled at why he wouldn’t want to be friends. It wasn’t a normal thing to really say unless there was a deeper underlying meaning to it all. “I’m not going to force you to be my friend, but it’s something to think about. You don’t seem that bad and I think you could use it.” She smiled trying to keep the mood as chipper as she possibly could while they continued on their way.
A monster? Had she ever met a monster before? She assumed he meant something gruesome and completely evil, but there were different kinds of monsters. She, however, hadn’t met one yet and never wanted to meet one. “No I haven’t seen or met a monster..why have you?” She asked looking over to him with innocent eyes not sure why, but she felt like something was wrong. “Is there something you want to tell me?” She didn’t know why she even asked that. Maybe something was bothering him and it was something he would tell her?
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Posted: Tue Jan 07, 2014 10:17 am
No family at all....would that have spared him, or lead him further down the rabbit hole he'd called 'life' till he set out on his own. He believed it probably was tied more with whom you shared your life with, rather than in what condition. If Georgia hadn't been in the picture his life would have been spent in the comfort of his parents and both his brothers. Darkness wouldn't have touched his soul....or would it? What if it was always there...and Georgia just was the one to shed some light on it?
No...he didn't want to believe he was a bad soul....but he was. He'd killed, and not only killed...it was his own father.
"N-no!" Abraxas shot his head up from his spiraling thought process, his heart already accelerating in his chest with each passing moment his brain refused to stop. "Not you....its me. You're such a kind soul, Berry...you shouldn't have anymore hardship in your life." Wasn't that what he was doing though? Abandoning her and her kind offer of a friend for his tired soul? Abraxas felt he was already showing horrible potential for a friend, this was not how they were supposed to treat others. Once more he felt his heart ache against his chest as he slowed his steps to a halt, his eyes falling to the ground at her final question.
He....he shouldn't drag it out....it was fun while it lasted; he'd have to catch the fireflies some other night by himself.
"Berry.....er....." Abraxas swallowed, hard, the images of that day in his head making his legs feel weak again. Unable to look her in the eye he kept his vision down, a rattling sigh escaping his lips. "The monster is me. I'm not a good stallion....I've brought nothing but tragedy to my family - and I don't want to do that to you. I may not be a skinwalker, or with claws and fangs....but my hooves have also been stained with blood." Closing his eyes tightly he felt his shoulders shake with the images replaying once more in his mind. Jaw tensing so hard he could have sworn he might break a tooth or two from the pressure, voice cracking slightly. "I don't want to turn on you too!"
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Posted: Thu Jan 09, 2014 11:25 am
Feeling a bit taken back by everything his had said, the young mare took a deep breath trying to wrap her head around the whole situation. It was obvious that something happened in his life that made him like this. He even said that his hooves were stained in blood at one time. Even though this frightened her, she wasn’t going to push him away and not be there to help him. He needed a friend and so did she. “I am a kind soul yes, but I also can do what I want with my life.” She said feeling like she grew up so much in the little bit of time she was with this stallion. Her fathers Hania and Enitan would be so proud of her. “Life is hardship at times..I was told not everything is like a fairytale and even though I haven’t believed that ever in my life…I do now. You are the first individual that has opened my eyes and I am grateful for that because now I know that not everything is happy or perfect. It’s something you have to work for.” She told him flicking her tail behind herself and thinking of every work he had said before.
He really was troubled. “You are not a monster. If you were you would have attacked me already or hurt me in some other way. I just think you are troubled and need someone to love you or be your friend. It’s sounds like you haven’t had a true friend in a long time. As for the blood…the past is the past. Look towards a brighter future Abra..you can do it and you can break away from everything that is crippling you.” She told him feeling herself getting a little emotional in the process. She never told anyone things like this before. It was so scary, but so liberating at the same time. She was going to help him as much as she could. She had to.
She could see and hear that he was upset. It was beginning to upset her. “You will not turn on me.” She said in a stern voice standing her ground as she looked at him with slight tears forming in her eyes. “You would never turn on me. Your friend and the only person willing to help you!” She shouted back not meaning to, but it just came out. She couldn’t control it and the shock shown clearly on her face. “I’m sorry…I didn’t mean to yell at you.” She said to him as her head lowered and she looked down at the ground. Her heart was racing in her chest. She never had such a complicated friendship with someone before, but she felt like this was worth fighting for. “Please…let us try to be friends. I don’t care what you did in your past. I want to be there for you and help you.” She was going to be persistent with him. She really wanted to try and help him as much as she could.
“Now…tell me everything that happened? I won’t run away or judge you.” She was being honest and her determination as well as her expression made it known.
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Posted: Thu Jan 09, 2014 12:12 pm
Work for....that was all he'd ever done with his life. Abraxas had tried so hard to emulate what he saw in others....it had made his mother smile to see a smile on her children's faces so he'd always made sure to wear one in her presence. When Georgia had come into his life he'd tried so damn hard to be like her, and what she asked of him...that attention, affection he craved had come at such a high cost...one the little colt at the time had no idea would cost not only he but his family so much. He longed for the world of fairy tales and magic of his early youth...and not the long path of twisted darkness which became his life ever since that fateful night.
"But I am..." He tried to reason, his face not lifting from its downwards position as he tried his best to quell the emotions bubbling up in his chest. "I've hurt those you should never hurt, if I cannot even be trusted around them how the hell am I ever to be around anyone else." It was an order...a simple, plain order and he'd leapt into action without a second thought, without any kind of conscious other than the possibility of letting Georgia down if he'd failed. All that training...all that mind altering talk had left him but a drone to be beckoned to command. He'd turned on those who gave him the very life he currently lived...without even a tear or guilty pang of his heart till the deed had been done and the realization sunk in on his actions. All he'd striven to receive from his sister was the affection he'd missed so much from his mother, and instead it was slapped in his face that he had been nothing but a tool from the start.
Abraxas' eyes widened though as her voice raised in a shout, looking up partially to see the shock spread across her face. However, something was breaking in him; the pieces too small to gather back together in such a short time to allow himself to remain subdued. "I turned on them!" His own voice raised, a strength hidden in the deep tones that was clear he could get things done when he was focused in his resolution. "I turned on them because of a simple command, because she wanted me to." He nearly spat out the reference to his sister as if it was venom on his tongue. "I had no other thoughts other than to end his life, there was no remorse, no second thought till my own father was dead at my hooves in a pool of his own blood...." Suddenly, he could see it, as his eyes swept down to the ground to the figure only his eyes could see. Oh no....
His voice dropped, that terrified quiver lacing each word as he could swear he could hear the sticky splash of his hooves on hot, freshly pooled blood. "...I....killed him in front of them all..." Georgia, Ahmri, Alessio....his mother....
Slowly his hooves began to step back, drawing him away from the mare, away from the image of his dead father on the ground. He shook his head desperately, the tears returning with a vengeance and burned at his eyes as if they were acid. "I am....nothing but a monster..." His breaking voice whispered; there was no escaping it....his past would always live on with those he loved most in this world. If he could not even face them, what point would there be in trying to repent for what he'd done...how could they ever forgive him for what he'd done. It would be for the best if he'd use the remainder of his life to face off against another monster - and try to drag them both into the fire brimmed underworld where they belonged.
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Posted: Thu Jan 09, 2014 1:10 pm
Feeling shocked from everything he had just mentioned before her, she didn’t know what to feel right now and for the first time in her life she felt scared. Not scared of him, but more scared that he would go into one of those state’s again and end up hurting himself. It sounded like it was something similar to a trance or brainwashing and he couldn’t break free of it. It saddened her so much that he went through so much hardship to the point where he killed his own father. The person who brought him into this world and someone you should hold the most love for as well as your mother. “I..” She didn’t know what to say and felt as if her voice had been taken from her right now at this very moment. But something in his words made her hopeful. He was commanded by someone else to do such a horrible thing. He wasn’t the monster: he was used and tossed aside by this evil being. She never thought she would actually think of someone as evil until now. This was a moment when it proved itself useful.
“Your not the monster..She was. The one that ordered you to do such a horrible thing. I don’t know if your family will ever forgive you since I am not them and don’t really know them..” She felt her voice shaking a little bit. She felt sorry for him and wanted to cry for him. She couldn’t explain this feeling right now and it was something she didn’t fully understand. “Just let your past go. It’s horrible what happened and it won’t ever bring your father back, but dwelling on it will just continue to make your life miserable. Be a better stallion. Redeem yourself and go after the one that did this to you. Prove to your family that you have changed and that your not a puppet to this mare anymore. Do it for your mother and your brothers..do it for your first friend..me. I know we haven’t known each other that long, but I feel as though I want to help you. To see you smile and be happy. To actually love yourself like you should.” She said to him feeling her eyes get all watery again.
She moved closer to him and looked into his eyes seeing the sadness of his life dwelling there. She wanted to see him happy and cheerful someday like she was. No one should be this stressed and filled with so much anguish. “You should be happy that you’re alive. You have the opportunity to change your life before you end up…dead.” She didn’t like saying that at all. It made her think of depressing things and it was something she really didn’t want to think about. Death made her sad and she didn’t want to think about her friend as dead. “I’m not going to abandon you. If you want I can go with you..if you do decide to go back.” She didn’t know how she would be able to help the whole situation, but maybe being there for him would give him the strength he needed.
“Does your mother miss you or know about what happened?” She hoped his mother didn’t blame him for it all. He was manipulated and it was something he couldn’t control. He needed to build his own will power and self-love though before he could take her on again. “You should work on loving yourself. I think it’s the first step for you to become a better stallion.” She nodded smiling only a tiny bit. She felt sad, but she was going to fix it. She had to.
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Posted: Mon Mar 31, 2014 6:53 am
Gritting his teeth for possibly the umpteenth time since he let out a little of his life, the stallion couldn't help it. As much as he was so sad and distraut about what he did...he was equally part enraged and seething about Georgia. In the end, it really was all her doing, all her fault but he was the one who couldn't fight the monsters and in the end became one himself. "She..." He gave a pitiful laugh, his brows drawing down into a deep frown. "She is my sister."
Sister. What a betrayal of a word that was, one which would usually belong to a trusted and loving family member...but boy was he wrong. Really, he supposed if she became the way she was that it would be in his blood to be able to do the same thing - something she possibly knew and played on. When she began to speak he looked up, the frown faltering back to a sad expression....would they ever forgive him? Could he honestly forgive himself for what he did? "But Berry....do I really deserve to have a happy life, after what I did to destroy the happiness of others? I....I can't go after her. Although I would love nothing more than to see some act of justice carried out on the one I hate to call my sister....i'd be ending yet another of my kin...my blood." It would really, in his eyes, be a reincarnation of that horrible day, shedding blood of one you called your own. As much as he grew to hate the very name Georgia....she was still his sister.
And she was still a sister and a daughter to his brother's and mother.
When he thought about going back, it nearly made him even more depressed if it wasn't for her approach, getting right up into his space and looking him in the eyes. Blinking for a moment as he tried to remain calm, he would be lying if for some reason he felt a little more vulnerable than the first time she got this close. Was it always this frightening to let someone in to such a tender wound he called his life? Yet...he had. He'd told her everything and she still remained. "I...." He swallowed, perhaps a little too hard. "I can't promise anything....but i'll try." To be happy, and love himself was a far stretch from his current state...but he also didn't want to completely push aside the wishes of Berry....his first friend in...well, ever.
"I....Don't know. I don't think so." Abraxas thought hard about this, he'd never really given much thought to the situation after it happened. He'd been numb for so long, he wondered was he truly missed or where they just thankful and hopeful he may have died himself? "I don't think she would know what happened, I'd only seen her before i'd....done what I did....and after I just ran. We didn't exactly talk." However he didn't blame her one bit, she had every right in the world to hate the son who took away her love. Yet when he looked down to Berry, he gave a bit of a pitiful smile....her optimism was rather contagious. "Do you really think I can...?"
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