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ADHD, terrible twos, late bloomer? Goto Page: 1 2 [>] [»|]

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PlasticStars

PostPosted: Mon Mar 13, 2006 12:06 pm


My boyfriend and I were talking about my son when I brought up that my mom was thinking he was autistic.
][ Autism: Autism is a form of pervasive developmental disorder with an unknown origin. It can range from high functioning to severe in nature. Symptoms are a marked lack of awareness of the feelings of others and little or no social interaction or communications with others. Children with autism are often described as "within themselves" and may seem to avoid affection and love. Many children with autism will not talk, are self-isolating and self-stimulating. Routines are important because many children with autism cannot easily handle changes in their environment. They can be taught self-care, social skills and language skills. ][
And reading that, it just doesn't fit my son. He's "talking", he'll say HI and sometimes BYE, and his most spoken words are COOKIE and NANI. We don't know what NANI is, or where he could have heard it. He's VERY affectionate when he wants to be. He loves to hug and be tickled, loves to be kissed all over his face. He's definitely not "self-isolating." He interacts pretty well with other children. But, he's 2, so he doesn't know how to PLAY with other children.

So, I found the definition for ADHD.
][ Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD): Similar to ADD in that the child with ADHD has difficulty concentrating. In addition, a child may also demonstrate disruptive, overstimulated or aggressive behavior and have trouble controlling impulses. This impacts school performance and makes it very hard for the child to stay on task. This disorder is typically more common in boys than girls. A child with ADHD can be challenging to parent. Medication and therapy can help to manage the symptoms. A specialist and not a teacher must do the diagnosing of ADHD. ][
He's beyond hyper, he cannot sit for longer than 2 minutes, even in his high chair. He is aggressive, he angers easily. He headbutts and slaps if he doesn't get his way, or he'll bang his head against a wall or something close to him.

I'm very worried about him. He's finally sleeping through the night, has been for the past ... 5 months now. His eating habits are weird. He doesn't want to eat meat, eggs, noodles, anything good for him. He'll eat cream of wheat, oatmeal, peanut butter sandwiches, crackers.. and of course, junk food, which I limit... a lot. I don't like him to have candy, unless its like Vday, or Easter or his birthday.

I just don't know what to do with him.
PostPosted: Tue Mar 14, 2006 4:09 pm


Talking: I wouldn't worry about it. The average for putting complete sentences together is 3-4 years old. 2 is when they are supposed to be just starting to discover proper syntax, but mostly working on expanding their vocabulary. Honestly though, I wouldn't worry about it. Getting all panicky and doing the doctor rounds and all that might make it worse if he is just a late bloomer.

Attention: He's 2!! Of course he can't sit still! I'd recommend doing some calming excercises with him just so he doesn't get trouble when he starts school, but other than that, I'd say he's fine.

Aggression: That can be a problem. I had a huge issue with this when I was a kid (and, really, about until I was 16-17). In my school, we made these boards with photoes and drawings that were laminated to draw on so that we didn't get marks on our desks. One day, my mom came in for a parent-teacher night and wrote on my board "remember, count to 10." It meant a lot to me. Whenever I would get angry in class and want to yell or hurt someone, I had that little note in my mother's writing to remind me to calm myself down. It didn't work all the time, or even most of the time, but it did some of the time and I'm glad for it.

Mostly, though, I think it's completly normal for parents to always wonder if something's is wrong or if they have someone "broken" their child. But it's important to remember that humans are amazingly resilient. Do what you feel is best and right, and trust that you are a good parent doing the right thing. Everything will be ok in the end smile

NOTE: I'm 20 and I've never had any kids of my own (or younger siblings, or even nieces or nephews). Take my advice with a grain of salt.

Akhakhu


Nikolita
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PostPosted: Tue Mar 14, 2006 6:21 pm


There's some information on ADHD and autism in the Depression and Other Mental Disorders Subforum in this guild, if you're interested.

I have no children/nieces or nephews of my own either, but if you're worried, all I can think of to suggest would be to take him to a pediatrician or someone who could diagnose something like autism.
PostPosted: Tue Mar 14, 2006 10:22 pm


I am currently an aunt...8 times now, no kids of my own.

My seven year old nephew is autistic. If you're worried, take him to a specialist, otherwise theonly advise I can give you is, look up information on autism and watch for the signs.

BrokenWing



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PostPosted: Wed Mar 15, 2006 2:37 pm


You're describing perfectly normal toddler behavior at this point, and I thought I'd point out that those disorders you brought up can't even be diagnosed until a child is 5,6,7 years old. So while I'm sure the ADD one has you worried, he's too young to even be diagnosed. So try to remember that he's TWO and two year olds are far from socialized, can't sit still and frustrate very easily. Add the lack of ability to communicate and you get violent tendencies. Toddlers are notoriously picky and vexing, so take a few deep breaths, do what you can and talk to his pediatrician if you'd like some suggestions and see what happens in the next couple of years.

He's still learning and you're learning how to socialize him, give yourselves time. ^^
PostPosted: Wed Mar 15, 2006 2:54 pm


I have a 2 1/2 year old. Sounds like par for the course.

Remember that EVERY DAY and EVERY SINGLE MINUTE of a toddler's life, expecially around two years old where they're finally starting to reason abstract concepts like object permanence is about CONTROL. About who has it and how they can get more of it.

It is then perfectly normal for your average two year old who is well behaved, sweet, listens pretty well, to just FLIP OUT because they can't have ice cream and throw an all out blow out screaming fit on the floor with kicking and head banging and the whole shebang.

And on eating. Welcome to the freaking club okay.

Here's "Ask Moxie's" index of child related food questions
http://moxie.blogs.com/askmoxie/food/index.html

I'm sure you'll find oh about a BAZILLION questions where some kid won't eat something or will only eat three things.

Just put it in front of him and if he doesn't eat he doesn't eat. Perhaps offer some kid friendlies like goldfish crackers or something along with it.

I don't know how much food I throw away but it's ALOT.

Lissa likes Bacon, cheese, noodles...all the things in Spaghetti Alla Carbonara, and sometimes when I make it she eats a heaping bowl and asks for more, sometimes she picks at it says "I don't like this" and gets up from her table. Sheesh....toddlers. So contrary.

Finally on speech...I'll quote my favorite internet boyfriend Dr. Greene of http://drgreene.com

Several warning signs along the way suggest that this powerful process may need some extra help. There may be no problem at all, but a child should definitely get a hearing and speech evaluation if any of the following applies (Nelson Textbook of Pediatrics, Saunders 2000):


12 months no babbling or jargon
18 months no single words
24 months vocabulary of 10 words or less
30 months vocabulary of less than 100 words or no 2 word phrases
36 months vocabulary of less than 200 words, no sentences, clarity less than 50%
48 months vocabulary of less than 600 words, no complete sentences, clarity less than 80%

See how from 2 years to 30 months they go from 10 words or less being a concern to less than ONE HUNDRED? Yeah...they really really start speaking in that 2-3 range.

Nopenname

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Akhakhu

PostPosted: Wed Mar 15, 2006 7:54 pm


I just want to add that you want to be careful about diagnosing your child. Unless it's a real handicap, I'd almost say it's better to just be extra careful about nurturing self control rather than just medicating.

I went to a High School for "special" kids and we had a lot of autistic kids. Frankly, most of them weren't autistic at all. They had trouble socially because their parents were so convinced that they had "broken babies" that they sheltered them (in one case, all three brothers were homeschooled until they were 14-15 and not allowed to have any friends outside the family because the parents were so afraid that they would be teased because of their "problems"). Talk to them, treat them like actual human beings, and they'd very quickly stop stuttering and have a perfectly healthy/normal conversation with you (except that they didn't understand half of references made because they weren't allowed to watch TV or anything else).

So like I said, even if your child does have a learning disability (which, to be fair, we all do to a certain extent), let it go and teach your child to survive despite it. Only if it's a serious problem would I say you should start doing the doctor rounds and popping pills.

It's natural to worry as a parent. But as our other moms have said, this is completly normal. I think your son is 100% fine.
PostPosted: Wed Mar 15, 2006 10:10 pm


I agree! He's two! My son did not eat hardly at all when he was 2 and was speech delayed. He is currently in speech therapy (but he's closer to 4 now). He's just starting to become aware of himself and what he can do and not do. It's stressful for us moms, but take a deep breath!

lunashock


PlasticStars

PostPosted: Thu Mar 16, 2006 9:52 am


Thanks you guys.

I've been reading up on the feeding and right now, if it isn't sweet or mashed potatoes, he refuses to even look at it. He'll eat bananas, cookies, ice cream, all that sweet junk normal (like every child would), but no meat (the texture probably turns him off, though he'll let you place it to his tongue before he completely turns it away).

I'm no longer worried about his speech or any of that. I'm just concerned now for his eating.

Thanks everyone. heart
PostPosted: Thu Mar 16, 2006 12:25 pm


PlasticStars
Thanks you guys.

I've been reading up on the feeding and right now, if it isn't sweet or mashed potatoes, he refuses to even look at it. He'll eat bananas, cookies, ice cream, all that sweet junk normal (like every child would), but no meat (the texture probably turns him off, though he'll let you place it to his tongue before he completely turns it away).

I'm no longer worried about his speech or any of that. I'm just concerned now for his eating.

Thanks everyone. heart


Sometimes you have to get reaaallly creative.

Start out with some tacos, or chicken SOS (gravy over buiscuits or mashed potatos with chicken bits in it), Lasagna with loooots of cheese, spaghetti, tuna sandwhiches, anything that would REALLY hide the meat. You can hide protien in the form of eggs and see if he'll eat bacon if you make spagetti Alla carbonara, PM me if you'd like the recipie (My daughter seems to love it more than hate it, because it's noodles and cheese which...are like her favorites). OH and don't forget peanut butter, peanuts, put them in anything you can if he's not allergic to them, Add them to stir fry, try them just straight in a trail mix, you might even get him to eat the raisins and banana chips or whatever, too. You could even make Peanut butter cookies if you're desperate to get some protein in him.

That brings me to the REALLY creative part. If he'll eat something like spaghetti you can hid mashed up baby peas, or carrots in the sauce. He won't taste a thing, but he'll be getting his veggies. Also if you can get him to think of muffins as a treat give him blueberry, strawberry and cream, pumpkin, you can even make carrot, or zucchini or banana.

Finally once again things that are sweet and seem like candy but arent, banana chips, dried fruits of any kind, yogurts with chunks of fruit, dude, if you HAVE to give him something sweet to get him to eat the rest of his food negotiate a trade off and give him marshmallows (no fat, just sugar).

Also Salsa is fantastic for them, combine with tortilla and cheese or crackers, or dude if you have to chips, whatever! because of the veggies and it also has zero fat.

I know it's a lot of work but sometimes you have to try and outfox them because like I said it's a power struggle.

Nopenname

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PlasticStars

PostPosted: Thu Mar 16, 2006 1:03 pm


Nopenname
PlasticStars
Thanks you guys.

I've been reading up on the feeding and right now, if it isn't sweet or mashed potatoes, he refuses to even look at it. He'll eat bananas, cookies, ice cream, all that sweet junk normal (like every child would), but no meat (the texture probably turns him off, though he'll let you place it to his tongue before he completely turns it away).

I'm no longer worried about his speech or any of that. I'm just concerned now for his eating.

Thanks everyone. heart


Sometimes you have to get reaaallly creative.

Start out with some tacos, or chicken SOS (gravy over buiscuits or mashed potatos with chicken bits in it), Lasagna with loooots of cheese, spaghetti, tuna sandwhiches, anything that would REALLY hide the meat. You can hide protien in the form of eggs and see if he'll eat bacon if you make spagetti Alla carbonara, PM me if you'd like the recipie (My daughter seems to love it more than hate it, because it's noodles and cheese which...are like her favorites). OH and don't forget peanut butter, peanuts, put them in anything you can if he's not allergic to them, Add them to stir fry, try them just straight in a trail mix, you might even get him to eat the raisins and banana chips or whatever, too. You could even make Peanut butter cookies if you're desperate to get some protein in him.

That brings me to the REALLY creative part. If he'll eat something like spaghetti you can hid mashed up baby peas, or carrots in the sauce. He won't taste a thing, but he'll be getting his veggies. Also if you can get him to think of muffins as a treat give him blueberry, strawberry and cream, pumpkin, you can even make carrot, or zucchini or banana.

Finally once again things that are sweet and seem like candy but arent, banana chips, dried fruits of any kind, yogurts with chunks of fruit, dude, if you HAVE to give him something sweet to get him to eat the rest of his food negotiate a trade off and give him marshmallows (no fat, just sugar).

Also Salsa is fantastic for them, combine with tortilla and cheese or crackers, or dude if you have to chips, whatever! because of the veggies and it also has zero fat.

I know it's a lot of work but sometimes you have to try and outfox them because like I said it's a power struggle.

Wow, thanks, thats great advice!! He won't eat noodles, or cheese. He loves yogurt, and bananas, he won't eat strawberries or any type of berry. But in yogurt, he will.
Have never tried salsa, and he likes peanut butter, of course we went through a time when he would only eat peanut butter, so he's burned out on that.

Any other food suggestions? He's a VERY picky toddler.
PostPosted: Thu Mar 16, 2006 3:59 pm


well I wouldnt worry about it. Patly becaus I have been there before. When my sister was two, she was a picky eater, threw fits, and couldnt sit still. Now shes six, and shes perfectly fine. Me and mom also called her "terrible twos" Also, I heard that having your child watching TV constantly can cause ADD or ADHD, so keep that in mind next time hes in front of the TV.( Note: Most ADD or ADD patients develop it early when they are young) Good luck!!! 3nodding

-samrox8

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Nopenname

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PostPosted: Thu Mar 16, 2006 6:20 pm


[ Message temporarily off-line ]
PostPosted: Fri Mar 17, 2006 7:45 am


Ivan rarely watches TV anyway. He'll sit still for Elmo's World on Sesame Street and Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, oh, and Cops. So, I don't have to worry about that, lol.

PlasticStars


wotfan

PostPosted: Sat Mar 18, 2006 7:41 pm


I would agree witht he late bloomer Idea it is not uncommon. My son (though he had medical problems till about a year) barely talked and refused to walk until about a week after his second birthday. He exploded into walkign and started talking saying little as your son does. You cant tell he was ever that way now he talks all the time. I dont mean to joke about a situation that worries you but you may want to enjoy the quiet while you have it. I hope it all turns out ok keep us posted.
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