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 Posted: Mon Nov 04, 2013 12:52 pm
Mark had not bathed for exactly one month, ten days, and four hours counting. The last time he had bathed, it was more like drowned, on one of the earlier mission attempts, when the Death lead had thrown him into a fountain to cushion his own fall as they were escaping from a flaming burning building with a mob of angry Horsemen occultists behind them -
- But that was another story for another day.
Today was simply the story of Mark not bathing for over a month. And also, Mark not bathing for over a month. And, as he walked from the main headquarters to his second home in the Life labs, pretty much clogging everything within a good radius around him with the stench of not bathing, and his clever attempts to get rid of it with Axe chocolate body spray, which might have made a difference had he not sprayed it on his clothes - saturated it even - and left it like that for a few weeks before spraying more Old Spice on top.
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Posted: Mon Nov 04, 2013 1:04 pm
Molly was well aware that Mark hadn’t bathed for a while…you know, aside from the stench…Lots of Hunters were talking about it…and that just wouldn’t do! Not to mention it wasn’t safe. That’s right, as a safety specialist, Molly knew it was up to her to make sure Mark was clean once more…and not just for his own good, but for the good of others! That’s why the Mist trainee was serious business as she stepped into Mark’s path. Her coat was left in her room and her sleeves were rolled up. Not to mention her holsters for various mission items were replaced with bars of soap and liquid soap. Her stern mother face was on. “Now Mark…it’s come to my attention you haven’t taken a bath in quite a while…and that just won’t do…okay?” She frowned. “I think it’s in your best interests to take one now, alright? Please?” Fingers flexed above a bottle of liquid soap.
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Posted: Mon Nov 04, 2013 1:18 pm
Something had to be done. The smell was getting worse - worse than it already was! How could she torment the death assistant, if she couldn't even get near him? Mark may not know it, but that smell was probably the greatest self defense he had against her. Unfortunately, Kat would not let it stand.
Peeking around the corner, she had in her hand, a bottle of febreze air freshener. She was hoping to spray it at him every chance she got, but judging from that smell that was coming from all the way down the hall, she was out matched. For the moment, she merely watched, as an orange haired girl spoke to him about his current hygiene problem, trying to convince him to take a bath.
Yes! A bath! That was the perfect solution for this!
Creeping up on the pair, she waited for Mark's reaction. He would most likely decline Molly's suggestion, and if he did... well, he would pay for it.
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Posted: Mon Nov 04, 2013 4:10 pm
Mark's Kat Sith Lord Evil Rays of Evilness radar was tingling, but unfortunately he was distracted by running from Molly approaching him, and fast. Like a possum, he considered playing dead, and was still considering it until she started talking about baths.
Mark thought about his bath tub for a long moment. He thought of how it was covered in haphazard wires and battery fluid. He thought about how the remains of the Argus project with Lucky was still amassed in the bathroom. He thought about the biohazard sign that was still taped to the door of the bathroom. He thought about the giant mutated Insanity squid that had manifested into his men's shower room the last time he had tried to take any semblance of a bath.
"Uhhhh...." the Death assistant inched a little further away from Molly, "Wow, gee, thanks for the offer, but I'm like, way too busy doing Death assistant... ninja... Jedi things so I'm going to have to pass." He saw that soap Molly, and the answer was no. It didn't help that Kat was looming in the background waiting for him to be weakened before she stepped in, like the sneaky dark evil Sith Lord she was of dark great forbidden evilness.
Mark calmly turned around, and when the thought he had correctly dismissed Molly, started bolting the other direction. Yes, Mark was fleeing.
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Posted: Mon Nov 04, 2013 4:43 pm
Mark was thinking about his tub, and Molly was thinking about the tub she usually used to bathe Canon Cats, for Mark. It was pulled out of the enclosure, and waiting in a corner…filled with nice clean water all for Mark. Molly frowned and her brows furrowed as the Death assistant seemed keen on refusing the bath, and as he took a step back, Molly took a step forward. Her hands were raised, as if this would help to assure the wild and scared critter that he was going to be okay. “Um…Mark…I’m really sorry, but I’m going to have to um…insist…you see, it’s not really safe to not bathe for that lo—“ Molly yelped as Mark spun around and then took off and then she was immediately bolting after him. “PLEASE MARK I REALLY INSIST THAT YOU TAKE A BATH! I EVEN PREPARED A TUB WITH WATER FOR YOU!” She cried, running after him, nearly in tears…from the stench of being in the tail wind of the Death Assistant.
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Posted: Mon Nov 04, 2013 5:19 pm
When the death assistant turned to run, that's when Kat made her move. Stepping out from behind the wall, Kat held up the febreze in hand. "Not so fast!" Without another warning, Kat sprayed the death assistant in the face with the cleaning product, which most likely resulted in getting his eyes. Whichever the case, it should at least keep him from bolting.
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Posted: Mon Nov 04, 2013 5:23 pm
The second the Febreeze hit Mark's face he screamed bloody murder, mentioned something about his eyes, clutched his face, and then proceeded to roll over in a fetal position, whimpering softly, rocking himself back and forth on one side.
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Posted: Mon Nov 04, 2013 5:41 pm
“OH MY GOODNESS!” Molly’s hair stood on end at that scream, and she skidded to a stop as Mark fell to the ground, and could now only stare between the fallen Death Assistant and Kat…and then the bottle of Febreeze in her hands. Well…on one hand, she utterly sympathized and felt sorry for Mark. She could only imagine how much it burned his eyes…and he should probably flush them out! But on the other, guilty, hand…she was kind of glad Kat was there to stop him…Mark really needed that bath. Which was still going to happen. “Um…” Molly tentatively waved her fingers at Kat, and then offered the Sun Hunter a nervous smile, and then pointed at the bottle. “…A-are you trying to get him clean too…?”
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Posted: Mon Nov 04, 2013 5:50 pm
Part of her cringed when Mark dropped to the ground screeching. The sadistic side of her was highly amused by the display. Thankfully, the febreze did its trick, if only a little too well.
"Ahaha, well.. I had originally planned to febreze him every chance I got, but your plan is so much better." If anything, Deus would be breathing fresh air after this was done. "You grab his arms, and I'll grab his legs. Mark, you're getting a long overdue bath!" Though, she was unsure just how long it would be until this smell came off.
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Posted: Tue Nov 05, 2013 12:04 am
Upon hearing their plan and seeing the dark corruptive influence of Sith Lord Kat in person in full view, Mark sprung into the air and summoned both his lightsabers.
"I will no longer let this dark evilness pass!" Mark shouted. "Prepare youself, for yesterday was like darkness and stuff but today the Force wins!"
With that he used one lightsaber to destroy Kat and the second one purify Molly, who fell right into Mark's waiting arm.
"Oh Jedi Mark," said Molly, in shock. "I didn't know what came over me! I'm so sorry! But I will now offer my sexy, hot body to you because I am a Mist Hunter and-"
- In reality, Mark was still curled up in a fetal position. He might have gone into slight shock. He was also lightly drooling. ooc Roll to grab a hold of Mark! Roll 1d4 to see where you grab (just roll once!) 1: you get his feet. A nest of cockroaches burst out from one shoe. 2: you get his arms. It smells like a skunk and a third world country bathroom died all up in his armpit, so you better have some crazy good endurance 3: you get his helmet. It comes right off! That grease on his hair could supply a whole said third world country 4: you grab his belt. Oh hey goodies! You walk off with a few Runes, an extra twenty dollars, and a custom lightsaber (it changes colours depending on the dial)
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Lucyal rolled 1 4-sided dice:
1
Total: 1 (1-4)
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Posted: Tue Nov 05, 2013 6:19 am
Well, Molly definitely had to commend Kat’s efforts…though spraying him only with Febreeze wasn’t going to cut it. Regardless, the trainee looked utterly grateful and thankful that she now apparently had help in this endeavor…after all, this was a lot for just one to handle…Mark would have gotten away if it wasn’t for Kat! Molly beamed at the Sun Huntress. “Oh, I’m so happy you arrived! Thank you so much!” Though Kat suggested she grab his arms, Molly instead reached for his feet, since they were closest to her. “I have a bath tub with water set up in the same corridor as the Canon Cat enclosure, so if we can get him there then—“ She grabbed his ankles, and a whole nest of cockroaches burst forth from one of his shoes, and scuttled over her hands before scuttling away. Molly suppressed a squeal, though it whistled out between her clenched lips as she did this:
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LividPeas rolled 1 4-sided dice:
1
Total: 1 (1-4)
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Posted: Tue Nov 05, 2013 7:54 am
Kat, cringing as she watched the nest of cockroaches swarm out from Mark's leg. How.. how could he live with all of those up his leg!? "We need a roach motel! Stat!" Sucking in a breath, she moved to help Molly by reaching for his other leg, which only signaled the other nest of cockroaches to flee out from his pant leg. "Oh my God!" This was so gross! So gross Mark! After this, she was going to make damn sure you suffered! And he was worried about what she would do to his little hulk action figure! Hmph! At this point, Kat believed she had liberated that dinky toy.
"Please.. please tell me you have flea and tick shampoo or something. God help me, I think he probably has those as well.." Among other things..
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Posted: Tue Nov 05, 2013 11:25 pm
Mark muttered something about his babies as he was dragged by both feet belly down, his arms clinging fruitlessly to tufts of grass. Random electronics and Runes as well as some spare change started to fall off his bodily being.
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Posted: Wed Nov 06, 2013 5:19 am
Molly wasn’t sure if she’d ever seen anything so…dirty…in her entire twenty something years of living. She shuddered again, especially as Kat grabbing his other leg sent more roaches scattering. “W-well…uh…I don’t have flea and tick but…it’s good stuff…I promise!” Loot from her tournament win a few weeks ago. With Kat’s help, Molly helped to drag Mark by his feet back to the Life Labs, though once in, they veered off to the corridor containing the Canon Cat room, and there…the holy grail. The bath tub. It was here Molly let go of Mark’s leg, reached into her holster, and handed Kat a vial of liquid soap. "It's dangerous to go alone." She informed the Sun Huntress with a hushed whisper. "Take this." She then pointed to the scrub brushes that were nearby, for when Mark was in the tub. She then moved to grab his wrists, and she gave a serious, solemn nod to Kat. “On the count of three, alright?” Yes. On three, they were going to swing him and drop him in.
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Posted: Wed Nov 06, 2013 5:01 pm
Kat may, or may not have snatched up a certain lightsaber which fell off of Mark as they dragged him to the tub. After all, a dark Jedi needed her own lightsaber, after all.
Once they had reached their destination, the Sun hunter straightened herself out, if only to attempt to get a fresh breath of air before bending back over to help Molly. Taking the vial of soap from Molly, she nodded. It was too bad she didn't think to bring in face masks or something, or even gas masks. Mark was literally a walking bio hazard.
"Alright, on three it is. One.. Two.. THREE!" With Molly's help, they swung the death assistant into the tub, probably less than delicately.
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