[R] Consequences [Lesath x Jett][FIN] | Page 1 | ♥ In the Name of the Moon! ♥ | Guild Forums

Orangeish Sherbert

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Posted: Sat Oct 12, 2013 6:44 pm


	She wasn’t happy. Or, was that an understatement? She was furious. After leaving the new Dark Mirror Senshi, Lesath had headed straight for a mirror, disappearing into it without a word. How could he have done this? Betrayed her trust like this? And what did it do, make her think less of him? Because she was damn well thinking less of him now. The eternal senshi prowled through mirrorspace, not really going anywhere. Should she cool down first? Or should she just go in there, guns blazing? To be honest, she was really tempted to just go in guns blazing. So. Off she went, climbing out of the mirror that was in the bathroom that the two shared. “Jett. You have a lot of explaining to do.” Boy. Did she ever sound angry.

Posted: Sat Oct 12, 2013 6:57 pm


	The downside of being freshly moved into an apartment was that there were still a lot of things they were missing. Like mirrors, in conventional places. Not that Jett was certain Raven would have even let him have a full-sized mirror anywhere but the bathroom. The steam filled, occupied bathroom. Jett was freshly out of the shower, towel in hand but not quite properly fastened. "Jesus, Raven, knock?" he asked, and while not normally the sort to bee modest about anything, her demeanor was enough to put him on edge. He looked over to her, wiping the wet hair from his face so he could better see her. "Since when did you start mirrorwalking up again?" he asked, perhaps trying to by a few seconds to collect himself. He knew she was mad. He figured he knew damn well what she was mad about.

Kyuseisha no Hikari

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Orangeish Sherbert

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Posted: Sat Oct 12, 2013 7:04 pm


	Lesath looked at Jett coldly, anger flaring in her teal eyes. “When did I start mirrorwalking? How about when did you start up again, Jett? Awakening new senshi are we? Well. Congrats. The new girl that you awakened took it upon herself to gather a bit of energy. From me. Tell me, can you even begin to imagine just how much I hate mirror wraiths? Despise them. Almost as much as I think I’m beginning to really despise you, my dear fiancé .” She spat the words, positively shaking with fury. “You promised me, Jett. You couldn’t even give me a ******** month. How many other times have you gone out? How many other times have you broken your promise?” Her hands were balled into fists and she shook her head still, turning her back on him, unable to look at his craptastic face. She wanted to hurt him, and right now she was damn sure that she could. Oh well. A hand came up, punching the mirror with a large amount of force. The thing shattered and Lesath let out a half mad laugh. How had the sound of breaking glass become her lullaby? Why was that even something that happened? Everything was just so ******** up.

Posted: Sat Oct 12, 2013 7:11 pm


	Jett's eyes narrowed. "Raven," he said sternly. He didn't know if she was inconsolable or not, but he was damn well going to try. A mess. Another mess for him to clean up. The glass was all over the bathroom. As if there wasn't already enough to be done around this place, now there was just one more. He couldn't tell her not to be mad; that was like telling a fire not to burn. "I went out once," he said slowly, eyes already going to her hands to determine if she'd hurt herself. He didn't think she was in any state to believe him. "Just once. I said I'd try, and I did. You were gone—busy. It just happened. I didn't think it would hurt. She was an accident. I didn't mean to run into her, and I didn't mean to awaken her." It just happened.

Kyuseisha no Hikari

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Orangeish Sherbert

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Posted: Sat Oct 12, 2013 7:16 pm


	She shook her head, the laughter continuing. She sounded on the verge of hysterics or tears. Or both. “That doesn’t just happen, Jett. You don’t just happen to decide to break your promise and go gallivanting out and just happen to awaken a heinous b***h who outs you. Things like that don’t just happen.” She still refused to look at him, choosing instead to look at the empty socket where the mirror stood. Lesath didn’t know what to do, not a damn bit did she know what to do. She felt hot and cold all over, and sick to her stomach, and she knew damn well her hand was bleeding something fierce. She could feel at least one large piece of glass sticking out of it. How could he have done this? Why would. The senshi closed her eyes for a long moment then turned to face Jett, shaking her head. “Whatever. Just. Just whatever. I guess we tried. We gave it a go. It wasn’t meant to be. You’ve proved that now. I can’t. We can’t. This just.” She trailed off, making her way to the door leading from the bathroom. It wouldn’t take too long to pack.

Posted: Sat Oct 12, 2013 7:26 pm


	She didn't have to spell it out for Jett to understand what she was implying. They'd done this once before. Sort of. "Why?" he demanded, this time more angry than before. He followed her from the bathroom, glancing again at her hand. "—Would you wrap that up before you bleed all over? Go back in the bathroom, I'll get the first aid and fix it up for you. We can talk," he said, trying to calm his anger. Getting mad wasn't going to make anything better. The air outside of the bathroom was much colder, though he was pumped up with adrenaline enough that he hardly noticed. His blood was hot; he could hear his heart thumping in his ears. He knew he was moving quickly but it felt like he was moving through molasses. Talking would have been ideal. He just didn't know if there was anything he could say to make this right. Maybe later. Maybe when she'd calmed down. Or maybe if he didn't say what he needed to now, he wasn't going to have another chance.

Kyuseisha no Hikari

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Posted: Sat Oct 12, 2013 7:31 pm


	”Please don’t touch me. I’m fine.” Her voice sounded far away and she moved rather slowly, letting her powered self fade back into plain ol’ Raven. She just didn’t have the energy to keep it up anymore. Didn’t have the drive required to keep it up either. She went to the closet and drew out her suitcase, beginning to throw her clothes into it, before finally just going and sitting on the bed, slumping over, staring down at her hand and wrenching the largest bit of glass out of it. “Why wasn’t I good enough, Jett? What did I do wrong?” Her voice sounded small and she wasn’t happy with that, but it felt like all of her anger had burned and fizzled out, leaving a gaping hole behind. A hole that she really didn’t think Jett would be able to fill again. Maybe not ever again.

Posted: Sat Oct 12, 2013 7:43 pm


	"You didn't do anything wrong," he said, though that meant accepting that he had done something wrong. And he didn't like to think that he had. She didn't seem at all interested in getting the first aid kit, so he took it upon himself and went to the bathroom, fetching the small box and presenting it to her. "You can't think about it like that. Like—like you weren't good enough. Why are you so mad when I power up? Why do you make it a competition, Raven? It was never a competition between that and you. It's like school—or my job, just something I do. You asked something of me—something you knew would be difficult for me, and you're mad that I went out, once?" Should he have told her? Confessed? Probably. It would have saved her from finding out like this. "Mad that I couldn’t live up to that expectation, mad that I had a moment of," he had to spit out the word, "weakness? I'm not perfect." He tried, but damn it. Sometimes even he fell short.

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Orangeish Sherbert

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Posted: Sat Oct 12, 2013 7:49 pm


	She shook her head at the offering of the first aid kit, flinging another shard of bloody glass onto the floor. “I just don’t understand. It feels like you just don’t…Jett. You broke a promise. And it hurts. It really hurts and I don’t understand and I just.” Another shard hit the floor and she felt the first tears start to dribble down her face. Well. Damn. “Weakness to do the thing that you love the most. I get it. I’m not it. I really do get it. It’s fine. I don’t care. We shouldn’t have gotten this apartment though. I am sorry for that.” And she was. She didn’t want to saddle him with all of the rent, but she wasn’t staying. She couldn’t. She was going to go back home to mommy and daddy, and have to realize that she was just a big fat failure. She couldn’t even keep a relationship going. How dumb was that? The blonde tossed another piece of glass to the floor and shook her head. “I was trying so hard. So hard to be enough for you, but I’m never going to be. I get it now.”

Posted: Sat Oct 12, 2013 8:00 pm


	"I'm happy with you," Jett said, again holding out the first aid kit. They had their ups and downs. But he was happy. "I fail to see where the problem lies. Why are you so insistent on beating yourself up? You wouldn't ask me to choose between you and my job, or you and college. So why this?" There was a sort of coldness about him, though it was not meant towards her. She wasn't screaming illogically. She wasn't throwing a fit. She wasn't cackling. She was sitting there, thinking, talking. She was aware of what she was saying. And maybe she meant it. "I have not asked much of you, Raven. In the grand scheme of things. Have I? Our relationship isn't…normal." He could admit to that. But how normal was it for people to have double lives like theirs? "But I never thought it was bad." Not bad enough to break up over. Not bad enough for this type of fighting.

Kyuseisha no Hikari

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Orangeish Sherbert

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Posted: Sat Oct 12, 2013 8:08 pm


	Raven continued to ignore the first aid kit, shaking her head again. “I don’t think you understand how it hurts me. How much it eats me up inside. You’ve always been better than me. Even when we were stuck on the surrounding, you saved me, and you almost died because of it, and I almost died inside because of it too. I thought I was going to be losing you, and it made me so sick, I just wandered around aimlessly. It was…still is one of the worst memories of my entire life.” She sighed. “I don’t know if you know, but I died up there. I died on the surrounding. And Ares brought me back to life. Brought Lesath back to life, that is. I had been a ghost. I remember tripping people and being so angry and resentful and pissed off…it is one of the strangest memories that I have, to be honest…But then when we met one another for real again. When we learned that we were both…both senshi. Both chosen for…For whatever. It felt right. It felt like things were right between us. Like we were meant to be. Or something dumb like that.” Raven let herself tumble over, curling into a ball on the bed. “You’ve been one step ahead of me ever since. And now you’re yards and yards away. I can’t compete with you, and I keep trying to, and I just get so depressed and angry, and when it’s just you and me…just Raven and Jett…I’m fine. I’m happy. But when you throw Remarque and Lesath into the mix…I’m just a sniveling worthless nobody who’s trying to keep up. You’re awakening everyone and you’re the leader of this ******** up group. And I honestly. I don’t want to be a part of the group. I haven’t for a long while now. And you being…what you are. That just. Sealed the deal on it. I’m sorry. I just can’t. I don’t think I can do this any longer, and I am…I’m just sorry.”

Posted: Sat Oct 12, 2013 8:21 pm


	For a long moment, Jett was silent. It took him longer to process several things than he cared to admit. He had not known Raven had died. He had not known Ares revived her. He had not known what the core of their problems were until now. There was an idea that he could not find the words to voice. A thought, he wished he could share with her. A conversation he wanted to have—a conversation that would fix everything. But he didn't know where to start. Every thought he head ended abruptly—every sentence ended prematurely. He wanted to reach out and hold her, to stroke her hair and tell her it was going to be all right. But he was the problem in a way he couldn't imagine. In a way he couldn’t change. Instead, he set the first aid kit down at the foot of the bed—within reach, but in a position where it wasn't in the way. "I might have understood if you had told me," he began slowly, though he couldn't know that. Even now, he didn't understand. "But I don't understand how you've come to that conclusion. You've never been a sniveling, worthless nobody. I don't know where you got that idea, or why you insist on competing." But it was a competition. It had always been. If not for her, for him. He had always classified her differently—she wasn't a rival, she was Raven. Raven, who had won his heart. Raven, who had wormed her way into a corner he had reserved only for himself. He had competed with others. He had always been that way. Always tried to be the best. You didn't lose when you were in first place. You weren't supposed to, anyway. "I don't know why we can't just be happy. If you don't like it—don't…don't power up. You don't have to, no one is going to force you. If you don't want to do it, fine. Don't. You don't have to think about Lesath, or Remarque. Just us. I'll worry about the rest."

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Orangeish Sherbert

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Posted: Sat Oct 12, 2013 8:30 pm


	”I know I don’t have to power up. And honestly, the only reason that I had my pen on me, and thank god I did—was because I ran into Acubens the other day and couldn’t do anything to help her and I thought she was going to die. So I resolved to just bring it with me in case something like that happened. Jett. I know I don’t have to power up, that’s not the issue. You don’t get it. The issue is you powering up. Because you’re going to take care of everything. Sure you are. You’re going to bring in more pretty girls, and I know if I don’t power up, I’ll lose whatever thin string of fate holds us together and you’ll go to one of them. A stronger one of them. Jett. I can’t do it. I can’t keep hating myself like I do. I can’t keep hating you.” Because she did. She resented him every moment he sat there. Every moment he even so much as thought about powering up. Every moment he thought he was the best. She just…resented everything. “It’s not going to work out. I know that now. I really do. You can’t give up being a senshi. It’s who you are. And I can’t…I can’t accept that. I know I can’t accept that, and I am truly, deeply, sorry.” To tell the truth, right now she just wanted to crawl under a rock and cry. Maybe forever.

Posted: Sat Oct 12, 2013 8:44 pm


	Jett hardly felt like he was in his own skin. He was there, but he felt so far away. It felt like he had a sunburn—like his skin wasn't quite his own. He had never thought of Raven as weak. Never thought of Lesath as weak. They just were. And they were perfect, just like that. But Raven didn't see it like that. It didn't sound like she ever going to see things differently. She was just going to go on hating him. And herself. Hating herself because of him. He was only now aware of the cold in the room, only because it shot through him. Numbed him. Maybe to staunch the hurt of Raven's words. Maybe he just didn't want to think she meant them. Logic told him to get up and get dressed. None of his muscles wanted to make the effort. "You're set on this," he said, mulling it over. It was almost a question, though he was losing hope that she had any intention of changing her mind. He wanted to look at her, to try and read her. He didn't. His eyes wouldn't move from the blank spot on the wall across from them. "…Then what do you want me to do?" …What were the options? If nothing was going to work, what was he supposed to do. Leave? Help her? Sit there and watch? …Beg?

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Posted: Sat Oct 12, 2013 8:54 pm


	”I don’t know, Jett.” She hadn’t replied when he mentioned her being set on the decision, but couldn’t just ignore him when he asked what he should do. If she had known that, she would have told him long ago…though. She had told him, and he hadn’t done it. It was all a waste. Everything was just…a waste. “I just feel. Empty inside. Numb. Everything feels numb right now…and I don’t know how to fix any of it. Not any of it at all…” She curled up a bit smaller, though glanced up and grabbed the first aid box, pulling out a band-aid and slipping it around the biggest cut on her finger. Futile. Everything just…was a waste now. What was the point? The point of anything. “I guess I should keep packing…”

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