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 Posted: Wed Oct 09, 2013 12:02 pm
It seems like a lot of guys my age still aren't out of the closet, as all that guys I've met recently who've been prospective boyfriends and such have wanted to keep things very discreet.
I'm not necessarily out to the world yet, but I'm open when prompted. I'd say if it wasn't for anything all that long term or for anything short and sweet I wouldn't mind it... but if it came to a long term relationship I'd prefer to be with someone who's out.
What do you guys think of guys on the "down low" and whether or not you'd still see/date/bomchikawowow them?
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Posted: Wed Oct 09, 2013 12:15 pm
As a general rule, I don't necessarily approve of staying in the closet. I'm a big believer in people being who they are and true to themselves.
But being in the closet is different than being on the down-low. You can be honest and open with yourself and those close to you about your preferences without advertising or being obnoxious about it. Like when strait people like to boast about just how strait they are, it annoys people.
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Posted: Wed Oct 09, 2013 12:16 pm
Well, as someone who is not out yet, I wouldn't mind if they were out or still in hiding. But usually when I hear them wanting a relationship discreet, I always think of someone who wants to live a double life and not wanting to ever come out, like ever. I try to avoid these relationship just because you never know when they will abandon their secret life for another. Now I'm not saying everyone is like that but it's just my opinion.
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Posted: Wed Oct 09, 2013 12:23 pm
Renkon Root As a general rule, I don't necessarily approve of staying in the closet. I'm a big believer in people being who they are and true to themselves. But being in the closet is different than being on the down-low. You can be honest and open with yourself and those close to you about your preferences without advertising or being obnoxious about it. Like when strait people like to boast about just how strait they are, it annoys people. I think I get it, kinda like being totally open and self-aware but not making your personal exploits the subject matter of all you have to talk about. A good example of the opposite being somebody putting up the whole "In a relationship with [INSERT NAME HERE]" thing on facebook?
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Posted: Wed Oct 09, 2013 12:41 pm
Chartreusethewaterdemon Renkon Root As a general rule, I don't necessarily approve of staying in the closet. I'm a big believer in people being who they are and true to themselves. But being in the closet is different than being on the down-low. You can be honest and open with yourself and those close to you about your preferences without advertising or being obnoxious about it. Like when strait people like to boast about just how strait they are, it annoys people. I think I get it, kinda like being totally open and self-aware but not making your personal exploits the subject matter of all you have to talk about. A good example of the opposite being somebody putting up the whole "In a relationship with [INSERT NAME HERE]" thing on facebook? Right. Or the obnoxious strait guy who has to brag about every woman he sleeps with and is soooo proud of his p***s. rolleyes Basically, to not be so "open" about it that you start to get on the nerves of everyone around you. I've met guys like that before. They take "gay pride" to an extreme that really hurts more than helps.
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Posted: Wed Oct 09, 2013 12:44 pm
Renkon Root Chartreusethewaterdemon Renkon Root As a general rule, I don't necessarily approve of staying in the closet. I'm a big believer in people being who they are and true to themselves. But being in the closet is different than being on the down-low. You can be honest and open with yourself and those close to you about your preferences without advertising or being obnoxious about it. Like when strait people like to boast about just how strait they are, it annoys people. I think I get it, kinda like being totally open and self-aware but not making your personal exploits the subject matter of all you have to talk about. A good example of the opposite being somebody putting up the whole "In a relationship with [INSERT NAME HERE]" thing on facebook? Right. Or the obnoxious strait guy who has to brag about every woman he sleeps with and is soooo proud of his p***s. rolleyes Basically, to not be so "open" about it that you start to get on the nerves of everyone around you. I've met guys like that before. They take "gay pride" to an extreme that really hurts more than helps. Yeah... its like dude, did you win the world cup? Didn't think so, stop hollering all day like you're some kinda penile champion. XD Some people are just the definition of Flaming gay and as joyflly enthusiastic as it is I really feel like no matter what orientation you happen to be there's just somebody who wants to be attention central.
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Posted: Wed Oct 09, 2013 1:39 pm
Where I'm from, being on the DL has a derogatory sense where they will only make themselves known when they are looking for a hookup. I would never give a person on the DL the time of day, not because of the stigma here, but because I'm openly gay and I don't find it reasonable to date someone who isn't. I like to go out and introduce them to friends and family and a lot of people who are DL can't go into LGBT+ places for general fear of being discovered.
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Posted: Wed Oct 09, 2013 2:21 pm
Well speaking as one of these guys, I'd say this is how I'm most comfortable and I imagine with a lot of other guys on the dl its the same, I don't really go in for relationships so whether they're hiding anything or not wouldn't really bother me
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Posted: Wed Oct 09, 2013 4:05 pm
If he's on the DL how would we cuddles in public o.o ....I can't even imagine Dx Sheer torture.. I'm nay xP
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