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[Q] Siobhan Morte // Senshi of Familiars Goto Page: 1 2 [>] [»|]

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Lavender Hues

Hatted Fatcat

PostPosted: Mon Sep 30, 2013 11:47 pm


User Image

Name: Siobhan Morte (Shi-vawn Mort)

Nickname: Fawn, Mort, Morty

Age: 16

Birthday: October 31st

Sign: Scorpio

Gemstone: Topaz

Blood Type: O

Fav. Food: Hazelnut coffee, lemonade, artisan chocolates, ribbon candy, licorice (both red and black), sesame chicken, popcorn

Hated Food: Mushrooms, cherry or grape candy, powdered orange juice mix, shrimp chips, super salty anything, green beans

School: Crystal Academy

Hobbies:

Movies: Fawn loves watching movies and the entire "experience" of going to a movie theater. Even if the movie turns out to be an utter flop, just being able to get popcorn and sit in the theater makes her happy. It's fun!

Oddities: It seems that being born on Halloween has had an effect on Fawn's interests, and has manifested in her love of all things weird, creepy, and out of this world. From creepy dolls to skull themed clothing, all the way up to an actual hand in a jar, if it's freakish and for sale, Fawn wants it.

Knitting/Sewing: You know that one pink scarf Fawn wears that you can't find in any store, no matter how hard you look? Well, chances are, Fawn made it herself! She loves making clothes and accessories for herself and for others, and can easily spend hours of time picking the perfect colors. Her favorite time of year to knit is in the fall and because of that her family calls it her "knitting season."

Virtues:

Outgoing: It doesn't take a rocket scientist to see that Fawn is an extrovert. Fawn is an absolute go-getter who thrives in social situations and seeing what the world has to offer her. Life is an adventure with tons of things to do, places to be, and people to meet, and Fawn wants to be right in the thick of it all.

Supportive: Fawn is someone who does her best to support people and the things she cares about. Be it volunteering at a bake sale for a charity or cheering for a friend at a soccer game, if you need someone to boost your morale, Fawn is more than happy to help.

Reliable/Trustworthy: Along with helping people do their best, Fawn is someone you can trust. She'll keep your secrets (unless it's something life threatening), hold her promises to her heart, and do her best to get her work done in time. On the off chance she can't get something done or she can't meet you when she said she could, she'll apologize and do her best to make up for it.

Flaws:

Gluttonous: Fawn bites off more than she can chew, both figuratively and literally. She has a habit of filling her schedule and her belly so much to the point of bursting that no one really knows how she can handle it. Oh well, a girl needs to keep busy and well fed, right?

Excitable: Having enthusiasm is one thing, but when Fawn is excited about something, it's difficult for her to keep it to herself. She'll squeal and bounce, like a toddler during the holidays, and just... Generally be annoying and loud.

Naive: Despite having a dark taste for all things creepy and horrifying, Fawn is surprisingly naive. Like a child, she still thinks that she can make friends with everyone around her and that everything can be fixed with pillow fights and ice cream. The world is small and simple, and any information to the contrary is met with a dumbfounded expression and a plethora of questions. Gullible is always on the ceiling, no matter how many times you make that joke in front of her.

PHYSICAL DESCRIPTION

Eyes: Halloween orange, wide and excited

Hair: Short, spring green, and curled to the point of disbelief

Face: Heart shaped and sweet

Clothes: Cute and creepy Bright and casual Clean and fancy
PostPosted: Mon Sep 30, 2013 11:57 pm


Senshi: Virginiaterése, Senshi of Familiars

Challenge: "Say hello to my little friends!"

User Image

Fuku Colour:

Main Color: Orange
Secondary Color: Black

Fuku:

Collar -- Normal collar, Orange with three black stripes
Bow -- A simple front bow and a frilly back bow (Lace?), Both black
Bodice -- White, laced up, like a corset
Sleeves -- Long black sleeves
Brooch -- Cat shaped, orange and shiny
Bottoms -- Orange skirt. Princess-y and just above the knee. Wears black leggings underneath that are tucked into her shoes.
Tiara -- Orange gem, black for band. Woods-y feel, elvish.
Choker -- Choker is optional, not needed. If equipped, it's simple black velvet with or without a cute cat-paw accessory dangling from it. (Like a cat's collar; Paw accessory would be orange)
Shoes -- Orange lace up boots that reach a little below her knees
Gloves -- Nope!
Accessories -- Black studs are optional as well as a black ring with an orange gem on her left hand.

Attacks:

Sailor Scout Attack: Boo-Boo Buddies

If Virginiaterése or one of her teammates should sustain a minor injury, she can summon one hand sized familiar to heal the wound. (Like a sparrow or a tiny frog) The wound can't be anything larger than the forearm or too deep, or the familiar won't be able to help.


Uses: 3
Duration: 30 seconds

Super Sailor Scout Attack: Contusion Comrades

Virginiaterése can now summon up to two moderately sized familiars (Like large bunnies or cats) to heal a large wound or soothe an internal injury, such as a concussion. These familiars need far more concentration to command and tend to be disobedient, which means Virginiaterése needs to be fast, but firm with her words to ensure that they listen to her.

Uses: 2
Duration: 40 seconds

Eternal Sailor Attack: Furious Friends

Virginiaterése is able to summon illusionary familiars for help during battle. These familiars are infused with some of Virginiaterése's power, giving them super sharp claws and increased agility. Virginiaterése can only control up to five familiars at a time and once they disappear, Virginiaterése can't use them again.

Uses: 1
Duration: 45 seconds

Lavender Hues

Hatted Fatcat


Lavender Hues

Hatted Fatcat

PostPosted: Sun Jul 12, 2015 9:47 pm


WELL, it's only been two years, but she's finally ready for critique! Come at me! 8D (But please be gentle, yes? ; U; )
PostPosted: Mon Jul 13, 2015 4:32 pm


Hello, Lavender! I'm here to leave you some crit and get your senshi in working order.

The civ portion is good, so onto the powered section. I'm afraid there's some work that needs to be done- first, Felines is too broad of a sphere. Yes, we have Canines, but that sphere would not be allowed if the character had been made today. We ask that you pick one type of feline and use that for your character's sphere.

For completeness, I'll give you some notes on your attacks. You need a number of uses for each attack (I suggest a 3-2-1 pattern of uses, but of course it depends on the attacks), and you need an amount of time that effects last. If you're doing an area attack, you also need an effective range for that attack. If Scratching Post and Cheetah's strike are kept, I suggest that the claws be magical, not physical in nature, and they only last for a certain period of time.. For Furious Friends, I'm afraid this attack simply won't work- you can't possess anything in the environment, especially not living beings. You could make an attack that conjures a bunch of illusionary felines and makes them attack (and eventually disappear), but no actual cats.

That's it for now. Quote me if you have any questions or once you have made changes.

Lavender Hues

Sami-Fire

Devoted Senshi

9,325 Points
  • Magical Girl 50
  • Over Easy 100
  • Invisibility 100

Lavender Hues

Hatted Fatcat

PostPosted: Wed Jul 15, 2015 4:11 pm


Sami-Fire


Hi! Thank you for critiquing her! emotion_kirakira I hope my edits are up to par!
PostPosted: Wed Jul 15, 2015 6:04 pm


Lavender Hues


Sorry, there's still work to be done. First, Black Cats as a sphere is both too specific and too broad at the same time; you need to pick a species of feline. I suggest Housecats or perhaps Cheetahs.

Second, your magic durations are way too long. Even at Eternal, senshi magic rarely lasts for over a minute. I suggest 30 seconds for Basic, 40 seconds for Super, and 45 seconds for Eternal. By the way, what is the difference between "duration" and "effects last?" I don't see any unusual remnants from your attacks that would require a timing on how long the effects last (for example, Megrez's basic and super attacks leave egg goop behind that disappears after a certain amount of time)- duration by itself does just fine.

That should be it. Quote me when you're ready or if you have questions!

Sami-Fire

Devoted Senshi

9,325 Points
  • Magical Girl 50
  • Over Easy 100
  • Invisibility 100

Lavender Hues

Hatted Fatcat

PostPosted: Wed Jul 15, 2015 6:14 pm


Sami-Fire


Alright, how does she look now? o uo
PostPosted: Wed Jul 15, 2015 6:30 pm


Lavender Hues


Good! Here's your stamp, and a GM will be by to give extra crit or a full stamp eventually!

User Image - Blocked by "Display Image" Settings. Click to show.

Sami-Fire

Devoted Senshi

9,325 Points
  • Magical Girl 50
  • Over Easy 100
  • Invisibility 100

Lavender Hues

Hatted Fatcat

PostPosted: Wed Jul 15, 2015 6:35 pm


Sami-Fire
Lavender Hues


Good! Here's your stamp, and a GM will be by to give extra crit or a full stamp eventually!

User Image - Blocked by "Display Image" Settings. Click to show.


Awesome! Thank you! emotion_kirakira
PostPosted: Fri Jul 24, 2015 12:29 pm


Bumping this because it's been over a week~

Lavender Hues

Hatted Fatcat


Lavender Hues

Hatted Fatcat

PostPosted: Tue Jul 28, 2015 11:31 am


Just posting to say that I won her powered art in Natsu's raffle on the 27th! >w< -So excited-
PostPosted: Thu Aug 06, 2015 9:13 pm


Bumping because it's been another week! o uo

Lavender Hues

Hatted Fatcat


Orangeish Sherbert

Lonely

PostPosted: Thu Aug 27, 2015 6:44 pm


Lavender Hues

Hiya Lavender! So sorry this has taken so long to get to you, life has been stupidly…stupid lately! Siobhan’s civilian side looks just fine to me, but her sphere is still too broad for the shop’s standards, I think! Housecats encompasses literally all of the domesticated cats in the world, and that is just too much! I would perhaps focus on a species of cat, such as a large cat, I did see you had an attack previously with cheetahs in it? Why not make her the senshi of cheetahs?

Please quote me when you have made any changes <3
PostPosted: Thu Aug 27, 2015 6:59 pm


Orangeish Sherbert


Thank you for getting back to me! ; u;

I've hit a huge roadblock here. While I do love cheetahs and they would make an epic Senshi, I have a wip of the art Natsu is making of Sio's Senshi form and... It's not cheetah like at all. I want her sphere to make sense with her art.

Would the sphere Bombay Cats be acceptable? It's a specific breed of house cat that I think would fit well with her theme.

Lavender Hues

Hatted Fatcat

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