Name: Gretchen Hoffman
Nickname: Gretch.
Age: 19
Birthday: October 8th
Sign: Libra
Gemstone: Opal
Blood Type: AB
Fav. Food: Apples. Brie. Filet Mignon. Salmon Fillet. Oven-roasted tomatoes. Crunchy asparagus. Pearl onions. Potato salad. Quail eggs. White Russian and espresso chocolate truffles.
Hated Food: Spray-Cheese. Spam. Bologna. Spicy foods.
School: Destiny City University (Gender Studies!)
Hobbies: 
xxxxxHypnotism Gretchen’s semi-secret pastime. Though somewhat inexperienced in hypnotizing others, she constantly searches for self-hypnosis videos on the internet for sleep, self-confidence, true love attraction, etc. because erasing stress with merely self-reflection and deep thought seems awesome/convenient/wonderful. Anyone who hints at interest in hypnosis, trances or even self-reflection will suffer (or thrive!) when met with Gretchen’s unbearable fascination. She will hypnotize them or ask to be hypnotized or inform them of its basics, what it means, how it works, etc.
xxxxx Opera Why are you crying, Gretchen? Oh. You watched Ernani again? Why do you watch it so often if it makes you cry? Oh, it makes you feel better that humanity isn’t like that anymore? Oh. Okay. Opera relieves Gretchen’s stress via THE FEELS. The complex, emotional turbulence of opera plots (Kidnap! Romance! Murder!) and the singers’ screaming compels Gretchen to watch and provides *catharsis!*. She studies, analyzes opera and enjoys it terribly—so much that if anyone mentions it, she flies off, listing her favorites, asking for thoughts on the plot, the characters and the overarching meaning. The opera means beauty, romance, freedom and intellect to her, so anyone who cares to enter her little world of music and joy is more than welcome!
xxxxxLITERATURE BOOKS. GIVE HER YOUR BOOKS. NOW. Gretchen reads everything. She loves culture, the arts, the sciences, cookbooks, history books. Just feed her your books, okay? She wants to know what you know. She wants to study human nature and track its development. She really loves old and rare books too because they suggest material worthy of timelessness. She reads quickly, so no worries, she’ll return them soon.
Virtues: xxxxxCompassionate GRETCHEN FORGIVES YOU. She knows you didn’t mean it, and even if you did, you’re still a beautiful person with a good heart, even if it harbors murderous tendencies…or malice…Yep! No matter! Gretchen will empathize and understand how that victim completely deserved it. Maybe she’ll even suggest active listening next time, so no one has to die, but no, she totally understands. This circumstance forced you to act. Her heart goes out to you! You poor thing! Let her make some tea and buy you a muffin. Her mercy and understanding no know bounds. She knows you try. There. There.
xxxxxGentle Shhhhh~ Wakey Wakey. Oh hello most smiley person. Gretchen will appease and comfort you. Yes, everything is good. Nothing is bad. Gretchen is soft and nice, and will never let a nasty thought enter your beautiful head. To her, everyone is a most perfect angel, even if they are misunderstood or make her feel sad, but that’s okay! Gretchen will never use a tone or snap. She’ll run away if upset, but even if there’s nowhere left to run, she’ll back against the wall and beg you to reconsider your actions, and she’ll do it gently, in a hushed tone or a whisper, like a spring breeze.
xxxxxStudious Read this book. Read that book. Read this link. Read that article. Gretchen studies anything and everything, from war to philosophy to magic to science (especially neurology, she loves that). Mostly, though, she studies ideas—wonders which motivates compel world-wide schemes, ponders and examines behavior, picking it apart like a meal. She applies this investigation to her academic pursuits and her major beliefs. She studies personalities to learn her friends—to glean information from them about becoming a better person—and she studies the weather, life, philosophy to apply it to her behavior and self-improvement as well. Though her terror leaves her a sheep, at least she can be a sheep who questions, right?
Flaws: xxxxxEntitled Why wouldn’t you give her the best of everything, though? She’s…she’s Gretchen! And she’s nice! And she only wants that $3000 purse. Surely, you can muster enough cash to grab it for her. No? A-alright, but she understands! She does. She knows that if you had the money, you wou—No?! NO?! ALRIGHT. NO IT’S OKAY. DOESN’T MATTER, BUT WHY WOULD YOU HURT HER LIKE THIS? WHY?! She’s a good person, and good people deserve nice things, right? Like caviar and mango-sauced pâté and gourmet chocolate truffles, or maybe luxurious Parisian throw rugs with crystal chandeliers. It’s not too much to ask. Surely you can make do. She’s earned it after all. Through her suffering. Life is unbearable, and for dealing with this monstrosity, well, it would be preposterous not to give her the world’s finest!
xxxxxSensitive You hurt Gretchen’s feelings. Why would you make her suffer? She only wanted a hug, not one of those throw-arm-across-shoulder-squeeze-and-release “hugs”. Now she stares at the ground, wondering why you hate her. Why do you hate her? You were mean too, when you pulled away three seconds in. Obviously a great hug lasts 30 seconds. Why would you treat her this way? Do you not like chicks in glasses? That’s fine. She’ll take off her glasses. Better? No? Oh no. Gretchen, don’t run away in tears. Do you see what you did? Poor girl can’t take it. She won’t even stay to tell you the problem. She flees—terrified of your hurt. She won’t push you away because, well, that would be rude, so she’ll take her leave, forgive you, and return for more punishment. She deserved it, after all. No reason to spare her feelings, even if they destroy her.
xxxxxTerrified Everything is suffering! Everything is terrible! Don’t…Don’t make her leave your side—even as she clutches your skin, fingernails driving deep, deep into your flesh. She trembles at the flickering of streetlamps and shrieks at the pop of a balloon. Don’t horrify her with your killing, your simper, your merciless gaze! She really wants to survive somehow. Maybe a friend will defend her—protect her from badness? Don’t mind the cling. It’s not permanent. Mostly. She’ll only use you as a meat shield sometimes. Otherwise, she’s eternally indebted, grateful, weak, too afraid to punch or scream or kick or move. Maybe she'll stammer out a thought. Poke you with a proposition, but then run away or cower or pray you won't hurt her.
