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 Posted: Sun Jun 23, 2013 8:47 pm
There was something odd about knowing there was someone on the island that cared deeply for her. It made Stormy feel as light as a feather, more openly affectionate, and far more positive than the teen normally was. There was also a newly planted, deep seated need to spread that happiness to others.
Considering she had two friends in limbo on her list, and especially considering the rather awkward and abrupt way they had parted, Stormy decided that day that she was going to start mending bridges and checking up on them. Jake was the more injured party (literally), and thus she started with him first.
And by started, she meant stand in her room and stare at his name on the cell phone for a few minutes and debate whether to do it now, or possibly in half an hour, an hour, maybe after lunch, maybe before dinner, maybe tomorrow--
No, now, Stormy told herself, and with a breath she fired off a text before she second guessed herself again.x[A.V.] Text to Jake:Hey. Are you busy right now? I want to talk.
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Posted: Sun Jun 23, 2013 9:05 pm
Every minute, hour, day... they all blended together. He could no longer tell what time of day it was anymore... let alone what day of the week it was.
... Had it even been a week yet?
There was nothing keeping him anchored, nothing motivating him, nothing driving him. With his weapon out of commission, he had barely touched the training grounds, and with no one to talk to... he found little motivation for anything. Each day was a blur, mundane and pointless. Belated mission reports, minipet duty, pod duty, there really wasn't much he could do on the island, as what could one do when they couldn't even fight?
Why was he still on this island? What did he exist to do? Each passing day, his resolve seemed to grow weaker and weaker.
... was there still any point to living? How come Caelius hadn't taken care of him yet?
... Why did it even matter? To the death lead, he was pretty much dead in his eyes. Useless. Trash. A burden on society. He gave up what little he had left to become a hunter, and he couldn't even call himself that now.
When his phone buzzed, he jumped, the sound of it rattling on the desk startling him.
Who would text him? It couldn't be...
His eyes glossed over the letter. No... she had been quite clear, hadn't she? And after everything... of course she wouldn't be calling him, so who...
Part of him still hoped, and so, with shaky fingers, he reached for the phone, flipping it open, and when he saw the sender, he froze, a chill running down his spine.
Stormy
He hadn't seen the mist trainee since... that cruise mission, but at that time, he had only gotten a glimpse of her. Was she fine now? Was she... still mad? His stomach twisted into knots when he remembered her angry voice, her mangled body. Of course she'd still be mad. But... he couldn't keep avoiding this. He had to talk to her, sort things out. Apologize. And perhaps ask her advice on something, because as he was now... he couldn't go on like this. Not anymore.Ol-j-man Text to Stormy: ... Yah, sure. Where do you want to meet?
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Posted: Sun Jun 23, 2013 9:12 pm
What a funny little ellipses he had there. Stormy squinted at it, trying to divine a meaning from the physical need to give a pause, and then quickly typed in a reply.[A.V.] Text to Jake:Maybe somewhere quiet? There's a few study rooms in the library if you want, and Capn needs me to work on something anyway.
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Posted: Sun Jun 23, 2013 9:21 pm
Jake squinted at the text.
... Captain? Who the heck was that?
Certainly not a certain life hunter that bossed them around during some mission in a library...
But.. he was glad she opted for someplace quiet. Surely there wouldn't be much people there... hopefully. He wasn't sure if he could even face anyone in public in the state he was, but at the very least, he owed Stormy an apology. A much overdue apology.Ol-j-man Text to Stormy: Sounds good. I'll meet you there in 5.
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Posted: Sun Jun 23, 2013 9:33 pm
Quote: Text to JakeOkay, see you then
Who knew how awkward they'd both be, considering she hadn't seen Jake in at least a couple of weeks . . . The glimpse at the cruise barely counted.
In mere minutes the mist trainee was in one of the study rooms, leaving the door open as she set her bag down and went to grab the small pile of books Ami had left at the front. Sure, she could have gotten it on the way over, but this was more time consuming and therefore better for her nerves.
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Posted: Sun Jun 23, 2013 9:41 pm
With that, he flipped the phone closed, and looked around his room, feeling as if he was forgetting something.
Chester, I-
... oh right.
Sighing, he slipped the phone into his pocket, and picked up the artifact that was on his table, eyes lingering on it for a moment.
What was even the point of carrying this thing around? Part of him wanted to say he felt safer with it, considering he was weaponless as of now, and... part of it... was because it was the only positive reminder he had of...
No, he couldn't dwell on these thoughts anymore.
Pushing himself out of his chair, he stepped out of his room, not caring to lock it, and made his way to the library, standing before one of the open study rooms.
Catching sight of Stormy, he paused, swallowing nervously, before stepping inside.
"...Hey."
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Posted: Sun Jun 23, 2013 10:04 pm
On Stormy's part, she'd become remarkably calm despite her initial nervousness and hesitation. It was always waffling this or that before something happened, but once committed (and especially for the sake of friendship, or whatever it was she had with Jake) she knew she'd never allow herself to back out--not without a very heavy conscience anyway.
So it was that Jake found her just a few pages into the book, a looseleaf paper at her left with a few translated sentences she thought were pertinent for Ami's research.
"Hey back," she greeted, lifting her pencil. "Thanks for coming." She paused, then scooted her chair back to go and close the door for want of something to do.
"So, um . . . how have you been?" More like are you healing okay?
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Posted: Sun Jun 23, 2013 10:13 pm
He watched as she got up to close the door, shifting slightly to move out of her way, and then when the door was closed, he realized there was no running away.
... hadn't that been what he had been doing all the time? Running away from problems? Chester had always been the one to help him out of tight situations, but now... he was on his own, no one to bail him out or take the blame. Just as it should be. He had to learn to deal with this on his own.
"I'm... alright." There really wasn't much to say. His wounds were... almost fully healed. Visibly, there would always be a scar, but... most of the pain was gone now, as long as he didn't go jabbing things into or whatnot, considering he seemed to have a knack for repeat injuries, but, asides from that, he was doing decently well for a guy without a shield, no steady healing help from a weapon.
"... How are you doing, or, uh, feeling?"
This conversation couldn't possibly get more awkward.
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Posted: Sun Jun 23, 2013 10:32 pm
More pausing. Stormy gave him a neutral, investigative look, her back to the door still. For once, Jake didn't feel hostile . . . More like tired. Repercussions of that mission and the cruise, or something else? Or both? His weapon of course played into it, and she had to wonder what it must be like to feel like there's a fraction of yourself missing.
"Better than I've felt in a long while," she answered truthfully, her expression softening. "Which is why I thought it was good timing to talk to you about things. And stuff." She paused, then gestured for him to take a seat across the table from her before moving back to get to hers.
"I guess the first thing I should ask is, uh . . . Any news about your weapon?"
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Posted: Sun Jun 23, 2013 10:57 pm
Her response made him blink in surprise, and a small smile curled up on his lips.
Well... that was good to hear, especially... after everything he had put her through. He only hoped his being here didn't damper her mood again. It seemed he couldn't do anything right.
He followed, sitting down, glancing off to the side as his hands fidgeted nervously, as if he were being interrogated. No, this was Stormy, there was nothing to be nervous about. If she said she was feeling good, that meant... she didn't harbour a grudge against him anymore? He could only hope.
Though before he could say anything, her question caught him off-guard, and he looked down again, frowning.
"...no, between getting my own injuries taken care of and that mission we had recently, I haven't had time to see about getting it repaired, but I'm thinking of doing it soon." He wasn't sure if there was any repercussion from being cut off mentally from a weapon for too long, but the sooner it was fixed, the better. He sorely needed the nergal's advice once again, his mind much too empty and dark, only allowing negative thoughts to brew within.
"I, um..." Oh geez, why was this so hard to say? "I'm... sorry. About... the mission."
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Posted: Sun Jun 23, 2013 11:02 pm
There was a word for his description as to his activities, she knew, but it escaped her. Just one little word to mean a whole state of being; what a strange thing language was. Missions and recovery, while legitimate reasons, also felt at the same time like excuses in a way. Or maybe she still held a bit of bias against Jake, a final frail knot that was slowly undoing itself inside her. But Stormy nodded nevertheless, because she could sympathize with procrastination--in all honesty, that's what she had done for this meeting.
Scooting the book and paper aside, she clasped her hands and regarded Jake peaceably. "Sorry about what part exactly?" she asked, sounding neither bitter nor accusatory but, rather, curious.
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Posted: Sun Jun 23, 2013 11:17 pm
Part of it had been that he didn't want to accept the truth. Every time he saw the broken weapons, his gut twisted into a know, immense guilt welling up inside of him. Another part was the possibility that even if fixed... would he be able to talk to Chester again? Or was their bond severed forever? This thought terrified him more than anything, and so he had decided to live with the truth rather than false hope, that his weapon was broken and he couldn't do anything about it, but... wasn't this the equivalent of giving up without even trying? If he didn't try to fix it, how would he even know that it wasn't possible?
He looked at Stormy, blinked, and sighed.
"Well... for... everything. For not looking after you in the Sahara. For running off and leaving all of you guys behind in the desert. For letting you get hurt by the horseman." He laughed bitterly. "Seems like all this time, I still can't do anything right."
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Posted: Sun Jun 23, 2013 11:26 pm
A list was good. A list meant he was aware of specific problems, and thus they didn't have to spend time extracting them. Stormy wondered just how much Jake had thought about that mission and, more importantly, how much emotional energy had been spent because of it.
That last sentence wasn't promising. It ached with familiar pang in her chest.
"Have you ever been a leader before, Jake?" It was far easier to enter this topic through a question, for through questions lied answers, or even more questions. Questions that generated conversation, stirred the pot of the mind, and brought out what might lie at the bottom.
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Posted: Sun Jun 23, 2013 11:48 pm
At the question, Jake shook his head, a miserable chuckle escaping his lips.
"Hell, I rarely follow instructions properly myself, and here I am being made a leader? To be honest, part of me was somewhat hoping the whole thing was a joke. Gale a leader, maybe. Marcus even. But me? What was the death lead even thinking? I can't lead a team. I can't even follow instructions myself!" He groaned, burying his face in his hands. "I admit, I screwed up. I didn't think of the consequences, and just let you guys pick up all the pieces. It... it would have been better if I had just let myself die back there. If only you guys didn't come, and left me there... perhaps that horseman would have been satisfied with just me..."
He knew dying didn't solve anything, and really, it would have been a cowardly way to go, dumping his problems on those who survived, but... just... what could he do? How could he fix what he had ruined? Was it possible to take away the pain and suffering they all felt because of him? Heck, even the horseman didn't think he was worthy as a fear harvest. What WAS he good for? He really didn't know anymore.
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Posted: Mon Jun 24, 2013 12:22 am
This was . . . not exactly what she'd been expecting. Considering how Jake normally was, Stormy would have imagined it would have taken a little longer to actually hit the problem, thought his forward manner did facilitate things. But something Jake said in particular touched a nerve, and though her expression didn't change drastically, her brows knitted.
She took the paper she'd been using to write down translations, balled it up, and tossed it forcefully at his head.
"Please take a moment to take a deep breath for me," Stormy said, her hands blindly groping for each other's security once more atop the table. "And then I want you to think about what you said. The parts at the end, I mean. And I want you to think about what that would have really meant, Jake."
She looked calm, and yet inside there was a stirring.
"We wouldn't have left you because you were our leader, whether you were prepared for it or not. I don't think anyone ever really is . . . But people put their trust in you, and you decided not to take that seriously."
[So, how seriously are you taking your own death, then?] Stormy had switched to Spanish in case there were people near, and her voice grew a little softer. [Are you saying you need to die because you made a mistake? Because you keep making mistakes?]
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![[A.V.]'s avatar](https://a1cdn.gaiaonline.com/dress-up/avatar/ava/8d/f2/221070ca3ff28d_flip.png?t=1546143856_6.00_11&pl=15)