A little over half a year had passed since his family had returned to him, but he barely needed the fingers on both hands to count the number of times he had been alone with Hadan since. After spending a very satisfying day... and night... catching up, Mmur had gone back to his new life, expecting his friend—now lover, he supposed—to join him in learning about Halloween and building a new and better life than the one they'd shared on the island of Famine. Instead, he'd been met with abrasiveness when he had sought Hadan out, even undisguised hostility, and it didn't take long for the cheerful horseman to begin avoiding his friend entirely as a result. It was why he was so very surprised when Hadan found him instead.

"I need to speak with you alone," the soldier said, taking Mmur by the forearm and leading him on a long stroll through the clans' camp then through a flickering portal. Hadan's grip was gentle. He could have broken away easily but Mmur was so delighted by the attention that he followed along willingly, if cautiously, running his fingers over the skin Hadan had touched before he had let him go.

"Yes?" Mmur replied. He spoke as if they were on a stroll in the country rather than... "Where are we?"

"Why does it matter?" As soon as Hadan snapped back, Mmur could see him formulating another more pleasant response to gloss over his first. "It's Morocco. Sorry."

"Did you get clearance for this, or—"

"I just want to know what you think you're doing. What this is." Hadan had moved so close that when he gestured between them, his knuckles rapped against Mmur's skinny chest.

"What do you mean? This is... us. We are together, aren't we?"

"No one would know it from the way you act."

Mmur couldn't help the confusion that touched his face, nor the brief hurt that followed or the faint, knowing smirk that eventually ended up there.

"Are you jealous?"

Hadan swallowed, his eyes narrowing dangerously as he leaned away.

"No. I'm humiliated. You made a spectacle of yourself not only with Na'ima, but with some... Conquest colt as well. It's unseemly. Disrespectful."

"And clearly just for fun!" Mmur snapped, turning away. Golden sand stretched under the setting sun, illuminating a sparkling amber village in the distance. He was drawn to it, tempted to send a small army of moths in to stir up a little chaos, but he resisted. They were on lockdown. They would be punished.

He forced himself to breathe, facing Hadan with a sullen scowl. Hadan, who had slept with more clansmen than he could count, who had never been concerned with appearances or with possessing him wholly and absolutely, holding him so close he couldn't breathe.

"What happened to you?"

"I died. I learned I was mortal. That's what happened. I have figured out what I want to do with the time I have left and who I want to share it with." Hadan took him by the shoulders again. "It is not you."

Mmur drew in a shaky breath, wavering on his feet as he soaked up the look of pity in Hadan's eyes.

"I didn't... what did I do?"

"Nothing. You sit in the Sanctuary dreaming when you should be taking matters into your own hands and trying to make things right. I know we are meant to follow the queen, but your lack of care is pathetic. Did you even think to take revenge after I was killed? Did you do anything at all?"

Mmur wanted to tell him about the chaos, how many of their kind hadn't known what to do beyond drinking themselves unconscious. How he'd thrown himself into Amityville activities and mingled and discovered a side of himself he hadn't even known he possessed.

"You did nothing, Mmur. That's the problem."

Hadan let him go.

He didn't remember falling to his knees, but when he became conscious of his surroundings hours later, that's where he was. He knew what the other soldier had said was true, but that didn't make his words hurt any less.

It took a while, but he eventually made it through the portal and back home. Or at the very least, to Halloween.