The camera fades-in to show the Totalitarianism Champion, King Kartwright, sitting on his plastic throne and wearing a cheap imitation royal robe along with his paper crown backstage to cheers from the fans. He proudly displays his title across his left shoulder on top of the robe. He raises his 'gold' microphone to his lips, ready to speak words so regal, not even The Queen would understand him.
Kartwright: "YO LWL HOMIES WHAT'S UP Y'ALL?!"
The crowd cheers his royal and regal call. This guy is totally legit. The King looks at his Championship and smiles.
Kartwright: "Guess what dawgs? I have held this Totally Awesome Championship ever since I defeated Nuke Fusion for it in my debut match last year. It has been the most epic reign in the history of forever, all thanks to me being amazing, being the best and being a winner. I have defended this title every single show. I'm not just the most dominant champion here in LWL, but anywhere on this planet."
Kartwright listens to his adoring fans chanting, 'WE'RE NOT WORTHY! WE'RE NOT WORTHY!'. They are right. They are not.
Kartwright: "But tonight is something different. It's not a one-on-one contest and that's because management KNOW that they can't take this title away from me in a proper match. But that's OK because I have a chance to WIN BIG AGAIN! That's right, the Main Event you are about to see tonight features King Kartwright, The Totally Awesome Champion, facing a bunch of nobodies as he goes on to win The LWL WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP!"
Cheers galore from the public at the thought of King Kartwright adding another title to his collection tonight.
Kartwright: "This is what's going to happen tonight. I'm going to enter the match. I'm going to pin somebody. I don't care who. Then, I am NOT going to be pinned. When the bell rings, I will be declared your DOUBLE CHAMPION AND RULER OF THE WOOOOOORLD! It really is that simple."
Chants of, 'RULER! RULER! RULER!' are heard which makes Kartwright nod in agreement with them.
Kartwright: "Tonight, not only does LWL bow down to their King, but so does the entire world and it's going to be the greatest night of my life. Nobody has stopped me before tonight and nobody is stopping me now. I'm going to be your LWL TOTALLY AWESOME WORLD CHAMPION AND THERE IS NOTHING ANYONE CAN DO TO STOP ME! HAHAHA! HAHAHAHAHAHA! HAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!"
The camera fades-out with Kartwright laughing like he has lost his mind, rocking back and forth on his plastic throne until it tips over on to the floor with him in it.
Kartwright: "YO LWL HOMIES WHAT'S UP Y'ALL?!"
The crowd cheers his royal and regal call. This guy is totally legit. The King looks at his Championship and smiles.
Kartwright: "Guess what dawgs? I have held this Totally Awesome Championship ever since I defeated Nuke Fusion for it in my debut match last year. It has been the most epic reign in the history of forever, all thanks to me being amazing, being the best and being a winner. I have defended this title every single show. I'm not just the most dominant champion here in LWL, but anywhere on this planet."
Kartwright listens to his adoring fans chanting, 'WE'RE NOT WORTHY! WE'RE NOT WORTHY!'. They are right. They are not.
Kartwright: "But tonight is something different. It's not a one-on-one contest and that's because management KNOW that they can't take this title away from me in a proper match. But that's OK because I have a chance to WIN BIG AGAIN! That's right, the Main Event you are about to see tonight features King Kartwright, The Totally Awesome Champion, facing a bunch of nobodies as he goes on to win The LWL WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP!"
Cheers galore from the public at the thought of King Kartwright adding another title to his collection tonight.
Kartwright: "This is what's going to happen tonight. I'm going to enter the match. I'm going to pin somebody. I don't care who. Then, I am NOT going to be pinned. When the bell rings, I will be declared your DOUBLE CHAMPION AND RULER OF THE WOOOOOORLD! It really is that simple."
Chants of, 'RULER! RULER! RULER!' are heard which makes Kartwright nod in agreement with them.
Kartwright: "Tonight, not only does LWL bow down to their King, but so does the entire world and it's going to be the greatest night of my life. Nobody has stopped me before tonight and nobody is stopping me now. I'm going to be your LWL TOTALLY AWESOME WORLD CHAMPION AND THERE IS NOTHING ANYONE CAN DO TO STOP ME! HAHAHA! HAHAHAHAHAHA! HAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!"
The camera fades-out with Kartwright laughing like he has lost his mind, rocking back and forth on his plastic throne until it tips over on to the floor with him in it.
