Welcome to Gaia! ::

Jordan had gone down the hall to the nurses' station and retrieved a cup of coffee. Now he was leaning against the wall with the cup in his hand, eyes closed, looking very tired. When Melvin spoke, he opened his eyes with a jolt, looking startled and lost for half a moment before he got his expression under control again. "You okay?" he asked.

Jordan nodded a little. "More than we know, I suspect." He looked over at the door, unwilling to go back into the room just yet. He'd seen too much of the infirmary this year already.

In response to the question, he shrugged a little. "Okay enough." He hesitated. "Sorry I yelled at you this morning. I was tired and I lost my temper."

Jordan took a sip of his coffee. "If I knew you better, I'd have more information to work with," he said, eyeing Melvin, "and I'd be less likely to be mistaken." He put on a slight smile. "That'd require you being willing to talk to me, though."

"I would imagine not," he commented, recalling how tightly wound Melvin had looked when they arrived. At the time, he'd been too tightly wound himself to give it much attention, but he'd noted it.

"I wouldn't mind. Intelligent conversation is the exception rather than the rule around here," Jordan said, and took another sip of coffee, grimacing at the taste. It was stale and bitter, barely drinkable, but he wasn't dealing with this - any of it - without coffee, both for the soothingly familiar effects of caffeine and for the psychological reassurance of having something to keep his hands busy with.

He shrugged again. "Everyone makes assumptions and fills in conclusions based on the information presented. If you want to call that profiling, I guess I can't stop you." He gave Melvin a curious look. "If you don't want people calling you a cold, emotionless b*****d, why are you presenting that way as a public facade?"

"From what I've seen, you either don't see or don't care when people are getting uncomfortable with the line of conversation you're pushing; that implies a certain coldness. As for emotionless, you're extremely reluctant to share any kind of personal details, which makes it difficult for others to empathize, especially when you're failing or refusing to empathize with them. You're often abrupt and forceful in your conversations. Do you see why people might start getting those ideas, especially if you refuse to let them close enough to get other ideas?" Jordan studied Melvin curiously. Trying to figure out what made Melvin tick was a good distraction from the dull ache of emotional pain that waited in the background.

"I don't," he answered. "And he likes you, so you and I are going to have to come to some sort of agreement, even if you decide you can't stand me. You're his friend, and I happen to think that's a good thing. Take that as you will."

"Pressing someone for what you want to know puts them on the defensive and makes them resistant," Jordan pointed out. "Taking the time to make polite conversation and establish a rapport with the person you're talking to encourages them to open up and share information voluntarily." He gave Melvin a sharp look. "You did the social equivalent of twisting his arm in that case, dude. You put him in a position where he could either answer your uncomfortable questions or be rude to you. Many people are socialized to avoid rudeness at all costs, even if that means putting up with intrusive actions or conversations. However, they'll probably then avoid the source of that discomfort."

He shrugged. "I'm not necessarily telling you you need to be more polite. But you wanted to know where people are getting these ideas about you that you feel aren't true, and I'm telling you what you're showing them to give them those ideas."

"No. I'm saying that your socialization was clearly different, and that this is where people are getting those assumptions about you." Jordan gave Melvin a long, even look. "You asked, dude."