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 Posted: Fri Apr 19, 2013 12:29 pm
There was motion in his peripheral vision. Jordan managed to ignore the glimpses of distinctive red most of the way to the building that housed the cafeteria. If Rep had any sense of self-preservation, he'd break off and head for the dorms and let Jordan cool down and have a cup of coffee and start sorting through the tangle of anger and rapidly growing guilt that was ballooning up in him.
Rep didn't, and Jordan's patched-together temper snapped all over again. He turned suddenly, planting his feet and again resisting the urge to summon Ferros and just make this into a fight. "What the ******** do you want."
Ferros rumbled unhappily.
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Posted: Fri Apr 19, 2013 12:36 pm
Rep wasn't sure why he was following Jordan, simply that all his instincts said to obey the command to go get changed and out of his way would be to lose whatever battle of wits this whole thing was. So he persisted, simply because it made sense to.
When the other man finally seemed to have had enough and rounded on him again, he stopped in his tracks, aloof as if he'd simply been walking that way and Jordan was making some kind of grave error of judgement. He'd twisted guilt into entitlement, the way he so readily did, in his head he was entirely in the right.
"I want you to ******** apologise to me is what." he said curtly. "Shouting at me in front of all those ******** people like that. I had s**t well in hand, I'm an adult." He pointed accusingly. "You Jordan Miller, were out of ******** order."
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Posted: Fri Apr 19, 2013 12:38 pm
"Bullshit I was. You do not get an apology when you were being an inconsiderate moron," Jordan growled back.
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Posted: Fri Apr 19, 2013 12:41 pm
"Inconsiderate? I only ******** went all the way out there because Melvin was being ******** depressed and drinking himself into a lonely stupor. So I said, we'll go out to the ******** bar. And we did. That was pretty ******** considerate of me." He narrowed his eyes. "But I get it, its no considerate if it isn't about you. Right?"
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Posted: Fri Apr 19, 2013 12:47 pm
"Oh no you don't." Rep wasn't permitted to spar with weapons, Jordan reminded himself. "You went somewhere that easily could've got both of you in major trouble, somehow managed to get yourselves into a brawl that got you tossed into jail, and only then shouted for help once you'd racked up considerable charges. That is not considerate! I might've bought that one if you hadn't gotten your stupid asses arrested!" He was shouting again, Jordan found, and he didn't really care.
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Posted: Fri Apr 19, 2013 12:51 pm
"I went somewhere I ******** knew my way about, I went home. And so what if I ended up in jail? Jail isn't a big ******** deal, it's as familiar as anything else there. Wasn't my fault either, if I'd started it people would be ******** dead!" He clenched his fists. "I wish I ******** had started it. ******** being nice, I'll just do stupid s**t all the time then, really give you something to be pissed about."
"If I'd known the ******** money was so important to you. I'd have asked someone else to ******** help me."
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Posted: Fri Apr 19, 2013 12:55 pm
"Well, it's a good goddamn thing you didn't start it then, because hey, last warnings?" Jordan growled. He hissed between his teeth in deep frustration, gave in to impulse, and smacked Rep hard on the shoulder, open-handed. "You could've avoided the whole ******** money thing by maybe bringing someone who could've, I don't know, calmed the situation down? Not gotten into the whole illegal and dangerous part of it in the first place? Going home sure didn't seem to keep it from being risky as ******** when it was risky as ******** anyway!"
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Posted: Fri Apr 19, 2013 1:03 pm
Rep wasn't expecting Jordan to hit him, but didn't actually seem too put off by it, rubbing said shoulder as he shifted his weight from one foot to the other as if considering retaliation. Instead he just seized Jordan's wrist hard and held it as long as he could. "Aye last ******** warnings. I know. Which was why no one got ******** hurt by me!"
He leaned in. "And who the ********> would I have brought? Melvin's the most ******** straight and narrow guy I know, I wasn't expecting the woman he was into to have a ******** jealous boyfriend, was I!?"
He let go of him with a snarl, just the physical contact screaming out for more in his thoughts. "Nothing I ever do is ******** good enough for you."
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Posted: Fri Apr 19, 2013 1:11 pm
"Oh, that's reassuring," Jordan muttered. His hand jerked in Rep's grasp, curled into a fist again. "Nobody you can think of, huh? Nobody at all?"
He drew his hand back as Rep let go, blunt nails digging into his own palm, tired and irritated and feeling trapped and backed into a corner by his own lapse in judgment. "Nothing I do is ever going to convince you otherwise," he gritted out.
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Posted: Fri Apr 19, 2013 1:18 pm
Rep was momentarily derailed by Jordan's question, temporarily wracking his brain for anyone who could have calmed down the situation in the bar. He didn't come up with anyone straight away but finally, absolutely finally got the hint. "You?" he said, perhaps a little more incredulously than was wise.
"Why would I bring you to a Scottish bar? You don't even drink, I mean aye you drink. But you don't drink drink. You don't like, join in, not the same way. Because it's all about control. I wanted to relax, I didn't want to be controlled or to feel like. Guilty. Melvin's a d**k but he still lets loose sometimes." He shrugged almost indifferently.
"I can't think of anyone else who would have wanted to come, Ace was in bed too that late at night or would have been soon." He raised a brow. "But if it is you you are implying here like. No. Never doing anything impulsive ISN'T going to convince me you can be relaxed."
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Posted: Fri Apr 19, 2013 1:26 pm
"Yeah, I'm just not that kind of guy. No fun at all," Jordan said, incandescent fury scaling down and back rapidly into exhausted hurt, into jealousy that he couldn't keep pretending was anything else. "And that wasn't what I - never ******** mind." His pride was already shot to pieces and thoroughly tattered.
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Posted: Fri Apr 19, 2013 1:33 pm
Rep was confused, something that didn't often happen to him, normally he had fairly incisive insight to how others were feeling. But right now all of that normal clarity was absent. "Did I say you weren't fun?" he said, "You are just ******** better than me. That's all there is to it. You aren't into the stupid s**t I'm into, you don't do stupid s**t like me, I get it. Which is why I don't ask you to lower yourself to that when I do."
He wouldn't let him back out of saying what he was going to. "No. What were you going to say? Because I don't ******** know what's going on right now."
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Posted: Fri Apr 19, 2013 1:40 pm
Jordan looked away, his shoulders hunching miserably. "I'm not better than anyone," he said. "I'm just a guy. Maybe I want to do stupid s**t once in a while. Or be good enough to hang out with. Jesus. This is pathetic," he said suddenly, sharply. "Can we just forget I said any of that?"
He sighed. "If you don't think I think you're good enough already," he explained tiredly, "I don't know how I'm ever going to convince you."
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Posted: Fri Apr 19, 2013 1:51 pm
Rep furrowed his brows as if wrestling with a very complex and difficult problem. He held up a hand as he spoke, gesturing along with his words. He knew Jordan was human, just a guy like him, but at the same time there was the fact he was so sure he wasn't interested in the childish and often reckless things he did. Explaining it was difficult. "But. Like. I. I don't mean you have to be like superhuman or anything, and it's no pathetic."
His own anger was ebbing away in the wake of distress, leaving a deep seated sort of panic. "I always want to hang out with you man. Why wouldn't I? That ring's no just some ******** joke. I just don't like asking you to do s**t I feel like you wouldn't be comfortable with. And I always figured like, getting completely ******** drunk was one of those things, just like fighting on a whim, just like most of the stupid s**t I do and enjoy. You never say."
"I'm no a ******** mind reader." If he was, he thought, maybe he could have helped Melvin some other way and avoided this whole debacle.
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Posted: Fri Apr 19, 2013 1:58 pm
"I don't even know, I don't - I haven't done this s**t, I haven't done much stupid s**t since I was a kid," Jordan crossed his arms defensively, embarrassed that he had to admit it, not entirely sure himself what he was feeling, "and then, I don't know, I feel like this and it's shitty, I didn't know I even wanted to, and nobody thinks I would so nobody asks."
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