All Aubrey could see were the flames, they were hot, burning her skin, drying her throat out as she screamed, screamed without end, but no one heard. Images clashed and collided in her mind, merging into something truly terrifying. She could hear tires squealing, the crunch of metal, the sounds of sirens, then silence. She could hear shouting and see flashes of lights, people running around, as if they were ants and their nest had just been kicked. She followed them numbly, not seeing what was really happening not knowing that her world was ending. Then all she heard was a flat line, and a shout of “Clear!”

She could see in her mind the match lighting in his hands, then falling into the trashcan, a flash of light, and everything she loved went up in flames accelerated by gasoline and lighter fluid. Screaming, she struggled against a force greater than herself and the arms that held her tightly in place, helpless to stop anything.

Falling, feeling the cold ashes in her hands as she dug frantically for something still whole, and at the bottom lay the twisted metal of so many beautiful things, now destroyed, melted together, never again to sing. Crying, Rage, Terror, Anguish, so many emotions that cannot be contained, ripped from the chest in terrible heaving sobs.

Two small pairs of hands clutched her own, pulling her back to reality.

When she woke it was to peer into the two concerned faces of her sisters, her cheeks were soaked with tears and the bed sheets were wrapped tightly around her body as she had thrashed against them in her dreams causing the feeling of being trapped in place. Wiping her face with the sheet she sat up and looked into their faces, she could see her own pain mirrored in theirs. They felt the pain, but not so much as she did. How could they possibly? To them he was a distant figure, cool, grown up, a model of what to be… To Aubrey… He was her life, her childhood happiness, the closest friend she could have ever hoped for, ever wish for.

And he was gone.

Aubrey opened her arms and her sisters crawled onto her lap and she held them both close, rocking back and forth. She glanced at the clock, it read 3:30am, but she could still hear their father downstairs. He was yelling again, it wasn’t a good sign. All three of them winced when there was the sound of breaking glass and an increase in the volume of shouting. She stroked the two girls’ hair murmuring soft, gentle words. She promised them happiness, and safety, knowing full well she could provide neither now. She only could keep repeating “It’s alright, it’s going to be alright” They took whatever creature comforts they could from it and slowly drifted to sleep.

She continued to stay up, guarding her siblings sleep, staring at the wall, seeing the flames without even closing her eyes. She could hear even now the twanging as boxes broke and keys melted and bent, twisting into a molten shape at the bottom of an ash filled trashcan. She remembered the last thing placed on the pile, the first thing to be soaked with accelerant and first for the flames to consume. Her first music box that her brother had given her almost 7 years prior followed by the collection he had built for her, with one more music box for her birthday and Christmas every year.

When Aubrey heard the dull sound of a punch connecting followed by a whimper of pain she carefully slid out of her bed, making sure her sisters settled down to sleep then walked carefully to the door. She slid out of her room and made her way silently down the stairs. The kitchen and living room lights were on, but the stream of cursing came from the kitchen so that is where Aubrey headed.

Pausing in the doorway she observed the scene in front of her as if she wasn’t there, an outsider looking in observing the plight of man. The sound of an open handed smack brought her back to reality and she saw the creature that was once her father in a drunken rage, he held her mother in a firm grip and had just slapped her in the face and was getting ready to backhand her again.

The time for observations was over. She crossed the room and grabbed his hand before he could bring it down to hit her mother again, she twisted it, using her weight to force his hand behind his back. Drunk, her father was not very coordinated and he stumbled, losing his grip on her mother who sank whimpering to the floor, begging them to stop. But words were lost in this monster. With a guttural growl he pulled his arm free from Aubrey’s grasp, and this time his blow was aimed for her.

She dodged the first blow and parried the second away from her body, so it merely grazed her shoulder. The kick however uncoordinated connected and she felt her leg twist from under her, she fell all the way to the ground and used her momentum to roll away from her father and stand back up to face him. He lunged towards her, grabbing with both hands and shoved her backwards, she landed hard against the kitchen counter and felt the wind go out of her. While trying to recover she attempted to sweep his feet out from under him. It worked and he took the fall hard, but the pain was lost on him in his rage and he rose far too quickly and was after her again.

This time the blow landed on her face, she could feel his knuckles connecting and bruising, and knew she would have a hell of a time explaining her shiner at work the following day, but at the moment she had more important things to worry about. He threw another punch at her and she parried it away, throwing him off balance enough for her to land a blow of her own, jabbing him in the chest with her elbow hard enough to push him back a step or two. While he was still off balance she pivoted and sent a kick towards the same spot in his chest, it landed with less power than she’d have liked but it caused him to fall. He groaned trying to stand up but fell back down, either exhaustion or drunkenness did not allow him to rise.

Aubrey glared at him with contempt then went to her mother to check on her. She waved away her concern and went to her husband’s side, speaking soothing words and helped him to his feet, then towards their bedroom. Her father glanced back at her before they disappeared up the stairs, and the look was filled with so much loathing and contempt it took her breath away, she knew this wasn’t over.

Aubrey stood in the kitchen alone, she pressed her fingers to her face and they came away bloodied, so she went to the bathroom and carefully dabbed at the cut over her eye with a paper towel soaked in cold water. Her reflection stared back at her, offering no words of advice or comments at all. Just a bruised girl who was not yet beaten, just trying to take care of her family, even if that meant taking the punches for them.

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