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He'd had worse ideas.

There was that one time he really wanted to prove that putting a fork in a socket wouldn't do anything, because the fork wasn't turned on.

There was that time he saw a kit kat on the floor of the bus station. Just a single, untouched, unwrapped kit kat. Who would leave a perfectly good kit kat out like that?

There was that time he licked a basketball hoop pole in the middle of winter. That one was kind of cool, actually.

So when Robert showed up at the infirmary, after having requested that he get some special training to help give him some kind of focus in life, he was pretty confident that this was not the worst idea he'd ever come up with. In fact, this could definitely be a good thing. There was a chance, at least.

A little one.

"Hellooo. Is there a doctor in the house?" Robert chimed out, knocking on the wall of the doorway he bent in to walk through. At least he wasn't coming in for a physical, for once. Or in a coma. No, this was definitely the optimal situation for walking into the infirmary. Just coming in for some training. Nothing more.

Hopefully.

Robert fought the urge to scream NOT IT himself when he heard them go at it, if only because of his overwhelming urge to not do whatever kind of responsibility was at stake. But he held his tongue, and gave Stephen an elbow to the side as he walked past, before Sunny's cheerful greeting made him wince. "Yeah. Well. Let's try to keep it that way. I'm just here because, I want to learn some s**t." Hadn't she gotten the letter he'd sent? He wrote it himself - by hand. He'd even used a pencil, and only broken the tip twelve times in the process. He'd given it to Leon to -

.........right. Leon.

"So, uh, I wanted to learn how to do some of the s**t you do. Like, you know, on a more professional level?" Without the letter, this felt way more awkward to talk about, and his words hedged with frustration. "I need something to do around here. Something to be good at. Maybe I'm good at setting people's bones. Who knows. Don't ********' judge me." He felt you judging him there Sunny. "I just wanna try somethin' new."

Stashing booze? Robert was interested. Being judged? Robert lost all interest. His expressions rose and fell like picture cards, the feelings behind them so obvious that a child could read them. But in the end, when she gave up and accepted him, Robert fist pumped and grinned with a giddy air. He tried very hard not to lose the positive energy at the mention of a leotard - damn you Leon, damn you - and he took a few steps closer, nodding his head quickly at all of her demands. Unfortunately, he didn't need to be a doctor to walk around like Dr. ********.. but that just meant nothing would change. Working with Sunny was not, in his wildest dreams, something that he thought would make him sexier.

No, he was pretty sure this job was going to be disgusting most of the time. But he drove past that. He wanted to help, goddamnit. Just.. just once. Not being a ******** would be a nice change of pace.

If he could manage it.

"Got it, boss." There was no sarcasm in his words. Sunny was now his boss, and Robert took that very seriously. Jordan knew it, and maybe Dr. H did too - but Sunny had herself a new chore dog, for as long as she wanted him.

"Do I need to know anything before I start? Like clothing restrictions? What time you want me?"

This was getting.. super excitingly official. He didn't know what scrubs were, but he imagined they were something he had to wear to help clean s**t. Cause. Scrubbing. So he just nodded, saluting the woman stiffly. "You got it boss. I'll be here." And he would be. Despite the fact that Robert hated mornings, and would lament about it loudly and crankily tomorrow to Petra's sleeping body in the bed, he wouldn't be late to his first day on the job.

Maybe his second. But definitely not his first.

He also didn't know what bedpans were, yet.

Still, when she explained how things would progress, a big, goofy smile started to fill up Robert's face. He liked when he wasn't being rushed - he needed time to get things right. Even if it meant doing them a thousand times.. and here, he'd get a chance to. He snickered at the nickname, and saluted again.

"I got it. I won't let you down, boss."

Because as stubborn and dumb and luggish as Robert was, he was a hard worker. And he preferred when someone was making him work hard.

And then Sunny broke his heart.

When he reached out to take the binders, his hands pressed against them for a moment, before he flicked them open carefully. At least she was promising that he could get through it on his own time. But still..

"I'll.." He paused, crunched up his face, and then smoothed it out in a sigh. "I'll try my best. You should know that-" Wait a minute, how did she know about those games? His eyes flickered up to look at her, and a bright red blush flowered on his pale cheeks. Well, he guessed she did know about his reading problem, if she knew about those games. And here he'd actually thought those were a secret. As if anything in Life was. "Fine." He snapped the binder shut and put them under his arm. "I'll take a while, but I'll get it. I'm in no rush. Got nowhere else to be, right? 'Cept 6 feet under."

It was a good thing he wasn't the kind of guy who didn't like grunt work. It was clear he'd be at it for a while.

Robert's grin was back, and he looked happier when he was being punched. He was twice as happy to get the hell out of her way. He backed up, gave her one last, almost affectionate look, and then hopped away to go read through four pages of the binder for the rest of the night - which wasn't him being lazy.. it was him trying his very, very best.