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 Posted: Mon Feb 18, 2013 12:16 am
Even after having freaked out on his pillow (note: buy a new pillow next time you're out) and venting about what an idiot he really was silently, Lex was still feeling damned stupid about his quick impulse decision to tell Ami that yes, he would date her. He supposed it was partially a want to not hurt the woman, but he did feel an attraction to her. He'd also felt attracted to Sarah, Jane, Jessica, Solia, Madeline, Kat, Jennifer, and Bianca. He'd cheated on all of them (save the Deus ladies; they'd been strictly casual) within a matter of weeks - in Sarah's case a day - and had left their hearts shattered. He couldn't do that to Ami, not when she'd just started to be happy for once.
But he just wasn't good with commitment. It scared him, it hurt him to think about. Staying with one person, leaving yourself vulnerable to them... He was never one to seek physical power over another, but the satisfaction of turning someone's feelings towards him was like a drug.
His routine in the labs and med bay done, Lex sat in his room with Regal, clicking the pen with a blank stare at the wall. What had he even done? Well, he'd ruined a good pillow with a bunch of FEAR bullets, for one...
A knock on his door, rather dainty. It could be anyone - they were all rather small, the girls he'd enjoyed time with. Well, maybe not so much Madeline... the girl was well built, very fit, but definitely not dainty.
"Come in?" He answered, his weariness masked. If it were one of the girls, he'd have to tell them that he couldn't.
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Posted: Mon Feb 18, 2013 1:46 pm
Eva was in a considerably good mood today. Of course, she wasn't not entirely without worries--she had had plenty of concerns about various matters lingering around the back of her mind--but in an effort to temporarily shove them to the side, she had picked up the cookbook that Lex had given her for Christmas and headed for the kitchen. Baking, she had reasoned, was a good way to get her mind off of things, right? And maybe she could bring a few of her creations to Lex as thank you for buying her the book in the first place.
Two hours later, the young woman had...arguably presentable cookies. Some of them were a little burnt around the edges, and the icing work could only generously be called messy, but she had made sure that they were edible. Arranging a third of the huge batch on a plate--the other two thirds would be split between Otto and Wilson--Eva made her way up to Lex's room and rapped on the door.
She poked her head in with a grin when he called for her to enter, all smiles and cheerfulness. "Hi, big bro! I brought you some cookies!" There was then a long pause as she actually looked at the man, her gaze sliding behind him and his pillow. Just what...?
Slipping into the room and being careful not to drop the plate of cookies that balanced precariously on the palm of her hand, she closed the door behind her with a little click. "You okay?"
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Posted: Mon Feb 18, 2013 5:43 pm
Lex's face lit up as a relieved sigh and smile both made themselves known at the sight of Eva, the young lady he called a sister. Her staring at his pillow didn't go unnoticed, and he rubbed the back of his neck in slight embarrassment. Yeah, new pillow next outing. He knew.
"Eva! Thanks for coming by, sweetie." He stood up to hug his little sister, taking the plate and setting them on the bedside table so they could have a proper hug. He wanted to just bury his nose in her shoulder, but he was supposed to be the strong one here. The big brother was always the strong one.
"I'm...alright." False. The pillow was enough proof for that, but Lex never was the person to just spill his feelings, not even with cookies. Feelings were something that could be manipulated, and he'd rather not be on the receiving end of that kind of offense. Not that Eva was even capable of twisting his emotions on purpose.
"Are you okay? How are you and Otto doing?"
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Posted: Mon Feb 18, 2013 9:00 pm
Eva eagerly returned the hug, jumping up to wrap her arms around her "big brother"'s neck and briefly lifting her legs off of the ground. When she let go and dropped back to the ground, she offered Lex a big grin and an airy wave of her hand. "Not at all! I thought I should try out that cookbook you gave me, y'know? ...I still need a little bit of practice though." Casting a glance towards the plate that had been set down, a small, sheepish smile spread over her lips. Well, she had tried her best.
Her brows shot up at Lex's reply, but rather than pry, she simply gave a little nod of her head, a faint smile tugging at her lips. "Oh, if you're sure! Though ah--" Another glance at the pillow, "Do you want me to uh, bring you my spare pillow or something for tonight?" Because his old one didn't really look usable anymore.
Perking up at the question, Eva lifted a hand and shyly scratched at her cheek. "Oh! Um, it's good! I mean, I almost had a heart attack when he landed himself in the infirmary, and it was a little awkward to visit when I was a guy, but...it's good! We're good!"
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Posted: Wed Feb 20, 2013 1:26 pm
Lex looked to his pillow too, clenching his jaw while smiling. Yeah...he probably should have hid that. Too late, the damage was seen. Regal chided him in his mind, telling him to just tell the little woman the truth and stop being a pathetic coward. Lex responded with a hearty dose of blank looks and telling him that he'd rather not look weak to his 'little sister.' Regal snorted but decided to just shut up.
"Er, if you'd like to? I slept fine last night without one; it's your call." He smiled, sitting on the bed and patting the space next to him. "Sit down and talk to me; we'll share your creations." He picked said cookie plate up, putting it on the bed after taking a cookie that looked a little like Dakota. Its "head" was gone in a second. "Oooh, this is good!" Martha Stewart had taught the girl well.
A moment of comfortable silence, and Lex bit into the cookie again. "Ah...yeah, I don't think I got to tend to him while he was in the infirmary. I heard it was pretty bad, though." Bad enough to warrant scars, apparently. "Though it does add to his rugged factor." He teased, winking.
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Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2013 4:29 am
Eva's gaze flickered back to Lex's face as the man turned briefly to eye his pillow, her blue eyes narrowed as she scanned the man's face intently. When he turned back to face her, she immediately forced her expression back to the same, pleasant smile she had been wearing a moment ago. Hmmm, now that pillow sure as hell didn't shoot itself, and her big bro was acting a little weird today...
Well, she would just have to find a way to ease the answer out of him. Lips curving into a smile, she reached out to give his pillow a wary little poke, jerking her hand back immediately after as if she expected it to snap. "I...yeah, I think I'll bring you my extra pillow tonight. A good pillow makes a big difference in a good night's sleep, you know! I'll even fluff it up extra well before delivery!"
At the invitation, she sat herself down on the empty spot beside him, her expression lighting up a little as she watched him grab one of the cookies. She knew that they weren't the most attractive things in the world, but she had followed the recipe perfectly. Hopefully...
...Ah, he liked it! Eva tried to suppress her grin, clearing her throat as she attempted to retain a dignified [removed](which to be honest, really didn't suit her). "Is that so? I'm glad you like it." "Glad" was an understatement, but it would do. On the topic of Otto, the girl's expression changed, softening into one of worry as she gave a little shake of her head. "Yeah, he looked pretty bad. I was really worried, and--Lex!" Letting out a surprised laugh, she reached out and gently gave her friend a playful shove.
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Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2013 4:45 pm
Giving the girl a cocky grin, Lex lightly shoved back, chuckling at her reaction. "What? You're saying you don't agree?" Though honestly, Lex would prefer Otto not scarred. He'd prefer a lot of people not scarred, honestly. He couldn't exactly fix that though, could he?
He finished off the cookie, smiling pleasantly at Eva. It was nice, knowing that he had someone on the island who cared for him, but that he wasn't dating. His expression dropped again at the thought of dating Ami, briefly, before he slapped a smile back on. He could do this - he just needed to wait until Eva left and then he'd berate himself even more - without shooting the Death's pillow. Maybe he'd just shoot some targets late at night, or whatever.
Regal chided him for not paying attention to the young woman, prompting an odd look on Lex's face. Since when had the Gryphon cared about anything but his own featherbrained self?
"I appreciate the pillow sweetie - you're a good little sister."
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Posted: Fri Feb 22, 2013 2:26 am
Making a face, she rocked her body to bump her shoulder against his. "Nooo, I like Puppy the way he is now!" A pause, and then she quickly added, "I mean, it's not like I wouldn't like him if he somehow did end up becoming more rugged, but uh, there's nothing wrong with the way he is now--nothing at all--and--"
--Annnd she was obviously thinking too hard about this.
Lex's thanks caught her off guard, and she blinked up at him owlishly for a moment before her lips spread into another grin. "No prob, big bro! But on the topic of being a good little sister..." She turned to angle herself so that she could face him more comfortably, her smile fading as she reached out to gently jab a finger at the man's chest.
"You...have something that's bothering you right now, don't you?" For all his smiles and silly jibes, there was something about him that was different today, the whole pillow thing aside. It wasn't anything obvious per se, but Eva just had this feeling, and she had learned to rely on her guts to tell her when something was wrong.
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Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2013 10:09 am
At first, all Eva got was a skeptical look from her 'big bro.' He could play it off, make it seem like nothing bad was happening. He didn't need to burden her with this kind of this kind of information. All she needed to know was that he was dating Ami now, and that was that.
<< Would you stop being so asinine, whelp? Shooting things isn't going to help for this one. >>
< Since when do you care? >
<< I don't; but if you keep this to yourself you'll end up distracted on the battlefield and get yourself killed - and I'll go into hibernation again. >>
Oh, of course. Regal would never care about Lex and his relationships, but just himself. Typical birdbrain...
Lex loosed a heavy sigh he had been holding, guilty looking at Eva and dropping his smile. Talking about feelings was something he wasn't really comfortable, or even accustomed, with. He bit his lip, pinching the bridge of his nose, and "I'm dating Ami now." There was a bit of happiness to his tone, but it would take some digging through the shame. He wasn't ashamed of Ami, by no means! "I'm dating Ami and I'm afraid I'll cheat on her."
There, he said it.
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Posted: Wed Feb 27, 2013 9:47 am
She could see the doubt on his face, but she simply smiled back in response, locking her hands together and setting them in her lap as she patiently waited for Lex to say...well, something. She watched his facial expressions curiously, her own smile fading when his dropped away. My, this looked...serious, to say the least.
When he finally answered her, Eva's expression immediately lit up, a mixture of glee and confusion. On one hand, she was fond of Ami and was more than happy to hear that two of her friends were now dating. However, on the other hand, she was puzzled as to why this would bring Lex such worry.
Of course, that matter was quickly clarified. "You're afraid of...?" The corners of Eva's lips curved downwards in a faint frown, but she reached out take one of her "big bro"'s hands in both of hers, meeting his eyes evenly. "Why do you say that, Lex? You like her...right?"
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Posted: Thu Feb 28, 2013 1:08 pm
The warmth Eva's small hands provided was surprising, comforting. He was unaware, but the Life trainee's hands were actually beginning to shake. He let out another deep breath at her question, face falling a little more. Now he was ashamed, when he thought about it. He'd been a jerk back then; it was why he stopped dating. People got hurt through dating. "Well...back in High school and Freshman year of college, I had a reputation." A snort of distaste. "I never had just one girlfriend. There was always one or two girls on the side." His voice bellied his shame and disgust. He'd been cheating, like his mother had done to his dad.
Lex bit his lip a little, eyes narrowing. He made a little hissing noise, shaking his head. "At one point, I was caught up with eight different women. That lasted for about a week, and I had to lay low for about a month."
Regal may have made a light cough of astonishment in the back of his mind. Eight? Dear Jack...
Clearing his throat, Lex did his best too look Eva in the eyes. "Basically, I can't commit. I've never tried, and I'm afraid I don't know how." A pause, and "I don't want to hurt her."
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Posted: Mon Mar 04, 2013 9:40 am
When she felt his hands quiver, her grip tightened ever so slightly, gently patting the back of one of his hands in a reassuring manner as she attempted to encourage him to relax. As he spoke, she remained completely silent, her attention fixated intently on her big brother's expression and his words. No matter what he said, she took care to keep her face relaxed--she wasn't here to judge his past, after all, but simply to listen.
Thus, although it did surprise her, Eva outwardly didn't even bat an eye when he told her that he had been dating eight different women at one point. It wasn't until he finished that she let out a thoughtful hum, sitting back slightly as she attempted to process everything. Finally, the corners of her lips curving upwards in a small smile, she turned to look at him.
"As I see it, Lex...the you from then and the you from now are very different." Deus Ex had changed nearly all of them after all, but whether it had changed everyone for the better or for the worse was debatable to be sure. Without removing her hands from his, Eva shifted so that she could face him a little more comfortably. "Isn't the fact that you're so worried about this a testament to that fact? From what you've said, I don't think worrying about commitment was something you would have done when you were younger...but here you are thinking--fretting--about it." That was already a pretty big change in Eva's eyes.
Expression softening, she gave his hand another pat, "If you've never tried to commit, how can you say that you can't? Maybe it'll take a little bit of effort, and maybe it'll be a tad difficult, but if you really like Ami...?"
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Posted: Mon Mar 04, 2013 11:55 am
Lex's face softened while Eva talked, giving her hand a little squeeze just to keep himself focused on her words, and not get lost in his own self pity and hate. She was speaking truth, he knew it, but his fears told him otherwise.
What if he tried and failed? He'd grown up in a home tainted by an affair, certainly he couldn't know anything different. He wasn't capable of commitment. What if she hurt him? What if he gave her everything, and she just threw it out like a three day old roast?
He gulped, shaking his head to rid the fear. Eva was right - if he really liked Ami (he did), then he would be able to weather the storms that might come with changing his lifestyle.
A deep breath, and Lex gave Eva a shaky smile. "You're right, sweetie. It'll be tough, I know that, but if I really do care for her..." His hold on her hand lightened, the quivering settled. Drawing the petite woman into a bear hug, Lex pressed a kiss to her temple. "Thanks; I love you."
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Posted: Wed Mar 06, 2013 8:53 pm
Eva knew that a mindset like that would be very hard to overcome and that, ultimately, her support would only play a tiny part in trying to shift Lex's insecurity. Still, she was happy to listen and encourage him, even if it would only help him a little. Ultimately, how things went would depend on him.
Should he want or need it through, the Death trainee was most definitely intent on continuing to be a supportive presence along the way.
She smiled when she was drawn into a hug, immediately wrapping her arms around the man and giving him a tight squeeze back. "Aww, I love you too! You know that I'm always here for you, right?" Drawing back, she lifted her hands and squished his cheeks between them, her lips curving into a wider grin. "Just lemme know, any time, day or night."
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Posted: Thu Mar 14, 2013 9:28 pm
More than likely, Lex would need a few of these "little sister and big brother" talks. This was going to be rough water, after all. Still, he would do his best to persist against the storms.
Giving her another bright smile, the tall man moved his face and flicked Eva's nose in retaliation. "The same goes for you, sweetie. If you ever need to talk about Otto or anything, my door is open." Day or night, sunshine or rain; he was a good listener - a trait he'd picked up in the club. Maybe it was time to start using his listening to benefit others.
"Just...text ahead of time." Because, knowing Eva, she wouldn't catch the tie on the door.
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