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Being healed by Virtus was a blessing. Carnelian had no idea where he might be if he hadn't been saved by the Dark Mirror. He was fully healed and felt as if he'd never had that fateful encounter with Sailor Tsui - that damnable senshi who attacked him without provocation. He wondered if Euclase knew about her and would hunt her down at a moment's notice. Carnelian's only concern was that Tsui outranked them both. Even if they teamed up, who knew what other atrocities the tiger senshi would commit against them?

For doing nothing!

He was running. Carnelian knew that his renewed strength would allow him to cross distances much faster than if he had powered down but it was much more dangerous. The corrupted senshi was counting on his aura attracting other Chaos members to help defend him to bring him down to the Rift to recover. He was running as fast as his legs could carry him.

He couldn't get caught. Not again.

s**t.

Carnelian felt her fractions of a second before she landed on top of him, sending him tumbling from his route onto the street below. He thanked the gods for his coat for it shielded his skin from the pavement, but not by much. The corrupted senshi grunted and cursed his foolishness. Sure it was a blessing to run into Virtus, who was able to heal his wounds. But with Tsui now atop him, it seemed like the blessing was utterly wasted.

"Get off of me!" he spat, teeth clenched. Poor Virtus... this was all just a waste. "I did nothing to you and yet you insist on stalking me? Why? What sort of sick pleasure do you get out of beating me to a pulp? Huh?!"

If Euclase was here, he would feel better about this fight. Euclase would inspire him to do his best. She was strong where he was not. Carnelian simply followed and catered to her every whim. Now he was wondering whether he'd ever see Euclase again. Her sultry smile, her deep blue eyes... oh how he craved to see her one last time before this b***h snuffed his life out.

The corrupted senshi cowered behind his arms in an effort to protect himself from more injury. She'd gone and torn up the sleeves of his coat and bruised his back, shoulders and forearms but thankfully hadn't hit him in the head just yet. He wouldn't fight back. He couldn't.

"What good would it do?" he hissed, peering from his arms periodically to cast her a venomous gaze with bright green eyes. "You'd just hunt me down again if I tried to escape... you'd just beat me more. Do you feel better now, Tsui? Do you feel better knowing that you're no better than we are? You're picking on someone far less powerful than you!"

A few more swipes made him curl tighter into a protective ball. "How does it feel to be a bully, Tsui?!"

Carnelian spat blood on the ground and looked up at her, opening his arms wide. "I have a family. Siblings, a mother. I have a girlfriend. I have a life just like you, Tsui. But if you want my starseed so desperately, take it." As if on cue, his dulled starseed shone a rusted red in his chest, hovering just out of Tsui's reach. It was a tempting target, especially since Carnelian was simply offering it up. He knew it was pointless - Euclase would avenge him somehow but he didn't want to leave her. Not when he had so much he still wanted to do.

"When you feel it in your hands, when you see me turn to ash, ask yourself - was it worth it? Do you feel better knowing you snuffed out a life? Would you feel vindicated, Tsui? Would you feel like a hero for murder? Those are very important questions, Tsui. How would you feel? How do you feel now?" He sniffed back some blood pooling in his nostrils.

Her desperate cries for retaliation were scoffed at. "No. I won't fight you. Pick a fight with someone willing, maneater."

Carnelian was stifled for a moment. He had hoped beyond hope that his words would allow him an avenue to escape. Maybe have the vicious Tiger leave him be for a moment. Eyes fixated on her for a moment, the young man forcing his breathing to steady. It had worked. Whatever she was feeling now wasn't bloodlust, but confusion. Perhaps anxiety, guilt, shame. Suddenly it mattered not what she was feeling but rather her next command.

Leave.

The corrupted senshi stood, shaky legs supporting him despite threats of collapse. The redhead wrapped his coat around himself and found he didn't have the strength to ascend the buildings nearby. Instead, he slowly crept by the tiger out into the open streets. Cautiously did he throw another glance back at her to be certain the tiger would not give chase. When the Super didn't move, Carnelian nodded to her and made his escape, dropping to a quick sprint to give him distance. He had to power down and blend into the crowd in case the huntress changed her mind.

Even when Carnelian fled the scene, Tsui felt absolutely horrible, and Pippin's sudden arrival and his harsh, tear-stricken words certainly didn't help. In fact, it made her feel so much worse, but what could she say or do to defend her actions? What could anyone say to defend their actions, when they knew they were in the wrong?

Sure, she could have easily have gone the tough warrior route, claim that there were technically no innocents in war, so long as they continued to power up and roam the streets. The only innocents were civilians that were dragged into the conflict, but even they seemed eager to defend themselves and the Negaverse from her... in war, were there ever innocents? Who had said 'War is Hell'? Tsui couldn't remember his name, thanks to her terrible habit of skipping school, but she was certain that she had heard the phrase before, and she completely agreed with it.

She could have also tried going down a less noble path, claiming that there were getting no where if they continued to hold back, that the war would never end without casualties on either side. Why should she hold back when the Negaverse and Dark Mirror Court didn't? Carnelian may not have killed others, but Benitoite, Painite and others had... if she were to be clumped in the same group as the terrorist group, why couldn't she do the same with the Negaverse? This kind of hypocrisy and a pathetic attempt to keep some damn code of honor would get the White Moon no where except an early grave! Why couldn't others see that?!

The third route she could have gone was throw the blame onto Pippin, and others in her own court. When he asked if it was his fault, she could have EASILY have tried to push the blame onto him. No, she didn't feel as if she was properly prepared to be brought into this war, and even now, a seasoned Super, she had no idea what her goal was. It was to defeat the Negaverse and Dark Mirror Court and protect Destiny City, but how could she do that if there were so many shackles and limitations? She spent most of her patrols alone. Spent most of her fights against them alone. She had no one guiding her all the time, no one to push her in the 'right' direction. She could have easily thrown the blame elsewhere.

But in the end, she could do neither. All she could do was look down at Pippin, tears streaming unbidden in her eyes, and she couldn't bring herself to speak. If she could muster the words without breaking into a sob, it would have been 'I'm sorry', but she was still too damn proud, though that act was quickly fading. She never thought of the consequences of her actions before, and now the hindsight of everything was stifling and crippling to her. Finally, she was able to mutter something, before turning away from Pipping to cry. "I'm sorry... I... I screwed up again."

What was the point of having pride if it only got in the way of things? Tsui wanted to drop all of her defenses and just sob her heart out, but still, she was trying to hold onto the illusion that she was strong. Yes, only an illusion, because she certainly didn't feel that strong anymore, and now, with only Pippin to see her so raw and exposed, she finally allowed the act to drop.

Without warning, she scooped up the smaller but pudgy cat and held him close to her chest, trying to be conscious enough not to hurt him but wanting to try and hug out all of her misery.

"I'm angry... because I feel like it's pointless..." Tsui admitted to Pippin, not trying to sound like a depressed, sorry-for-herself brat, but she was certain that she came off that way. "How can we win this war... and not be just like them? How can we get anywhere if we keep holding ourselves back...? Will it ever end?"

She buried her face into his fur and confessed, "I want to fight, but... I don't want them to be right. I don't want to be a monster..."