I'll Be Home for Christmas
"I'll be home for Christmas," I assure myself while running through the sandy terrain of Afghanistan. "For my wife, for my daughter, for my-" BOOM! Suddenly everything is a blur; I hear someone yelling. At me? No, they're yelling for help. I look around and find over thirty men lying on the ground, at least ten men standing trying to aid them. I shoot around aimlessly in the direction the bomb came from hoping to hit somebody. Finally, I give up, the ringing in my ears slowly fading away.
"Everson! Everson, over here!" I look around trying to find where the voice of my fellow soldier is.
"Berkly!" I cry back still looking around and keeping my guard. Finally, I notice him. He's on the ground with the other soldiers. I run to his side and squat down, gun aimed in case of attack. "Are you all right?"
"Yeah. Fine," he says, but I know he's not. "Listen, you gotta get outta here. Get help, but don't get yourself hurt. You got a family, I don't. You have to get outta here."
He's right. "I know. But, man, I can't leave you here. Hell, I can't leave anyone here. You'll all die. I can't do that." I say, getting to my feet. "I'm standing guard here until help comes. No excuses."
I look back at Berkly. His eyelids are heavy, and I can tell he's going unconscious. He gives a slight nod and mouths, "Thanks, man." before he completely shuts his eyes.
I turn around and see something flying through the air. "Take cover!" I scream running the opposite direction with the few other men. It's no use. In an instant, we're all down on the ground. All I remember is hearing a gun fire and seeing the last bit of daylight fade away before I black out.
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I wake up in a hospital bed, IVs and tubes running from a machine to my arm. I try sitting up but find it difficult. I then try looking around me, but I can't seem to move my neck. A nurse walks in a checks the machine. "What happened?" I ask.
"Bomb," she replies faintly. "Killed thirty-seven, seriously injured three." She walks out as quietly as she came in, and I'm left alone with whoever else is in here.
Immediately I think Berkly. He died, most definitely. I don't think I can stand that. He was a good man. Then I think, Cecelia, my daughter, and Quinn, my wife. "Home for Christmas...home for Christmas." I say.
I lie awake for a few more minutes before dozing off into a dream that will not let me awaken. First, I see a Christmas tree, my Christmas tree, with it's lights and ornaments beautifully shining in the dark. Then, I am looking out a window to see a land covered by snow. And my wife is baking, my daughter playing in the light of the fire. t's a perfect Christmas, perfect family, perfect everything.
I wake up with a start, and I know that was suppose to be this year, my family, my life. And it will be. I'm determined to be home for Christmas. Oh, how I long to see my wife and daughter. The nurse comes back in (I must have been out for awhile) and I ask her if there's any way I could see my family.
"I can try contacting them, but I doubt they'll be able to travel due to the weather. Maybe I can get a video chat for you. I know other soldiers were doing that earlier." She says, a glisten in her eyes.
"Okay. Thank you. By the way, are we still in Afghanistan?"
"No, we're in Florida at a special hospital for injured soldiers." She replies. "I'll go see about that video chat." She turns and walks out of the room.
Florida. Completely across the country from my home in Oregon. I say a silent prayer that my family is safe and I can talk to them before dozing off again. This time, I have no dream, but I feel like I've been asleep for days when I wake up.
The nurse comes in with a laptop and adjusts my bedd to a sitting position. That's when I notice I've lost both of my legs. All I see are stubs where my thighs should be and bloody bandages where my knees should be. I take a deep breath and hold the thought as the nuse sets the laptop on my lap.
My daughter is on the other end. "Daddy! Oh my gosh! Are you okay? I miss you so much. When are you coming home?"
"Hi, CeCe. I miss you, too. I'm fine, but I don't know when I'll be home. I love you, and hope to be home by Christmas." I say, her eyes lighting up. "Is Mommy there?"
"Yeah, hold on." CeCe jumps up from the desk and runs to find her mother. Quinn sits down and smiles.
"Hi, Honey. How are you?" She asks.
"Better. I miss you. It's great to see you." I say smiling. "Can you fly down here with CeCe. I want to be together for Christmas."
"I don't know," she replies her face looking sad. "All the airlines are closed and don't plan to be open for about a week."
"Well, Christmas isn't in a week, is it? I've lost track of time."
"Tomorrow is Christmas Eve, sorry." She says looking down at her hands.
"Oh," I say, "Then I guess I'll see you by New Year's?"
"Hopefully," she answers looking around. "Cecelia, come say good-bye to Daddy."
CeCe comes back in view, "Love you, Daddio! Please come home soon."
"Love you, too, Sweetheart. I be home soon, I promise." I kiss my hand and put it to the screen, CeCe and Quinn do the same. "I promise." I whisper one last time before exiting the video chat and handing the laptop over to the nurse.
"Thank you," I say as she takes it back.
"Anytime." She lays my bed back down and leaves.
I stare at the ceiling repeating, "Home for Christmas. I promise." Over and over again.
I'm soon served a meager supper and fall asleep.
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The next time I wake up, a doctor and two nurses are standing over me. The doctor unwraps the bandages and says, not knowing I'm awake, "He's still bleeding, I think there might be blood poisoning."
"Blood poisoning?" I ask, startling all three of them.
"Yes, I'll do all that I can," the doctor replies.
"Thank you, but can I at least talk to my wife and daughter again?" I ask the nurse who gave me the laptop last time.
"Sure. He's just going to clean out the wounds, so I'll go get it." She replies leaving the room. She returns with the laptop, and I see the shining faces of my wife and daughter.
"Hey," she says. "You holding up?"
"Yeah, I'm pushing along. Doctor says I might have blood poisoning." I say feeling the sadness in my voice.
"Oh, that's not good." Quinn replies, her voice small.
CeCe breaks the silence, "Daddy, you'll be okay. You are strong, I know you are. Please be home soon?"
Yes, Sweetheart, of course." I say.
I hear the doctor say, "Oh, no." And I move the laptop to see what's going on. The doctor is over my legs and the nurses are handing him gauze and bandages. I bleeding again, I can tell. I pull the laptop in front of me again, but everything begins to get hazy.
"Hey, Quinn, find that christmas CD." I say.
"Already have here, why?" She asks concerned.
"Play 'I'll be home for Christmas' please." I tell her, everything hazier by the second.
"Okay." hurriedly she puts the CD in a begins the song. "There you go," her voice is rough, she's starting to cry.
The song plays on and we all listen. As it gets to the last verse, I can barely hear it and the room is a complete blur, but I sing along:
"Christmas Eve will find me,
Where the lovelight gleams.
I'll be home for Christmas,
If only in my dreams."
My eyes begin to close and I hear my Daughter screaming, "No! Daddy, don't go! Daddy! Wake up! Wake up!"
Quinn is crying to hard to say anything.
"I'm going home, Sweetheart," I tell Cecelia. "I'm going home..."
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