Welcome to Gaia! ::

Sitting beside the fire pit, watching the way that the fire was dancing before him, the young halfbreed was trying to decide upon what his next move would be. He had gotten something so important as a rank, got a weapon, he felt as though he should feel a little more elated... instead he just felt a bit the same as he had before when he was back home. He was sitting around doing little, he was on the bored side, and he got the feeling that he should be doing... more. What though? Should be doing more practice with his spear, perhaps? He'd started to do that, trying to move more fluidly with the weapon since it's weight wasn't something he was used to carrying but still it felt as though that wasn't enough. Maybe it was because for so long it didn't seem as if they were doing anything in Zena? Had the journey, or at least this half of it, ended? He was getting the feeling that it had.

A little squeak escaped from his lips as Jera plopped down alongside him suddenly, dragging him closer to her, and told him that he needed to save her from the cold. His eyes got a little wide, his cheeks colored, and his antennae gave a twitch, "I-I have a b-blanket in my pack if you need it." He said, more then willing to get it out and wrap it around his sister if he thought that she might want or need the item. He was quite well prepared, and the Ice Tribe had been only more then happy then share with them what they had, blankets included, since they weren't exactly ready for such weather as what they had in Zena, "I can get it for you if you like." Though he didn't move to get it, finding that he kinda liked the hug of sorts she was giving him. It wasn't something he was used to getting being the outcast of the village so he would take the affection where he would get it, even if the hug was given only because Jera wanted to steal his warmth.

At the mention of being tired of the landscape and the colors white and gray he tilted his head to the side, "I guess it is a little dull here compared to home." Tale had been the same way though with shades of brown instead of grays. At the mention of going home though his antennae twitched that much faster, "H-Home, huh? Yea... maybe? Though there are t-the other lands to e-explore..." He said weakly, not sure he wanted to go home yet given who was waiting there for him, likely someone that would want to either give him a swift kick in the backside or lock him up again where he would be safe... he didn't know if were ready. Couldn't they just keep wandering for a while longer? Given they were both given rank though perhaps that wasn't something that would be looked upon very well. What should he do then?

Rishima's cheeks went that much brighter as he was told that she didn't think the blanket would help and that they should just stay as they were. As he was pulled over all but into her lap he couldn't help but to marvel over how much bigger she was then him. It was only natural, she was full blooded Alkidike, but at the same time he felt a little odd in this position. He'd seen others, those of the other tribes, snuggling in such a manner but it was the female sitting in the larger male's lap, not vice versa. The thought was one that he instantly shoved aside, cheek getting even brighter, antennae wiggling like crazy now, "Ahhh... i-if this is h-how you want t-to stay then it's f-fine." He said, his voice barely above a whisper, finding even that difficult to get out at the moment.

Glancing up at the girl he couldn't help but to feel a touch of disappointment when Jerarda announced that she was done with exploring, that she wanted to go back to Jauhar, but figured that just because they were going to Jauhar that didn't mean that he had to go home, right? Jauhar was a big enough place after all. He was somehow certain though that the moment that he stepped back into their homeland that his mother would know about it and find himself instantly. He shifted in place before he leaned into Jerarda, "If you w-want to go b-back then we will... I j-just hope she d-doesn't drag me home." He whispered. He didn't want to go home, didn't want to go back to being overly protected and kept like he needed protecting, he wanted to be Alkidike even if not all of his sisters would be as accepting as Jerarda had been of him.

At the mention of the mother tree, Aisha, his eyes got a little wide, "M-Me? G-Go there? I don't know... I don't know i-if I would be welcome." He murmured, he wasn't a pure blood, wasn't even a female, what if they didn't want him around? What if they attacked him or chased him off for getting too close to the mother tree? There were those after all that likely thought him a spy, even with an Alkidike rank he would still appear suspicious to those that really hated the Shifters, "I... I wouldn't want to get you into trouble because you were the one that brought someone like me there."

Let his mother know how well he was doing on his own... well he wasn't exactly on his own, he'd been traveling with a group, not to mention trying to emulate Jerarda, but at the same time he was doing all of that under his own power, right? What would she say though? How would she react? She was bound to be upset with him for sneaking off while she was away from home but at the time he had felt it was the only option that he had, he'd wanted to become more after all then just someone doomed forever to be in the position of a youngling, "P-Perhaps... though I-I have to admit's daunting... t-to think about facing off with my mother like that." He murmured, the woman wasn't going to be all that happy and he was going to need ever last drop of his courage. Maybe if he started to gather it now then he would be ready to face her by the time they got back to Jauhar from Zena?

When talk turned from one mother to another, he found himself tilting his head to one side, thoughtfully. Would the great mother tree, Aisha, actually accept him despite half of him not being Alkidike? Surely there was a chance since he was born from a lotus that came from the mother tree just as all of the pure bloods were. It was an interesting thought, "I... I think a pilgrimage there would be beneficial." he murmured after a time. The idea of seeing the tree he came from, to pray to the great mother for guidance, it might make him feel more as one with his people. Surely, as a Blade, he had the right to visit the tree, didn't he? He knew that being male and Alkidike made him... strange, something not often seen, but it didn't mean that he wasn't of the tribe. He just... well, he had a lot of work to do so that he could close the ground between himself and the others of the tribe. Not only was he smaller but he'd been held back by his mother's over protective streak... it was something that he had to overcome if he wanted to continue to rise in rank he thought to himself.

"I want to go to the tree." He finally said, Jerarda had a point, if she thought that they should accept each other to really be able to protect the earth then he had to be as willing to open up to his other sisters just as they had to open up to him. He couldn't hide behind Jerarda forever, even if it were something that he preferred to do since he was so in awe of her. She was the led him forth from where he'd been hidden away and encouraged him to become more then he was, he owed it to Jerarda and her belief in him to grow strong.

When it was pointed out to him what he'd done in facing Yansa and getting her approval, someone in a position of power who really didn't know all that much about him, he gave a nod, "I hope she will see things the same way that you do, sister." He murmured, giving a bit of a smile when Jerarda nuzzled against his hair in such a sweet manner. She really was nice, wasn't she? She acted tough and always appeared ready to knock the life out of those that she met, but he really felt that she was also a good, kind person, one that was always helping him out. It made him want to get stronger so that one day he might be able to help her in kind. It would take some work to get to such a level but he would do his best to reach that level.

Letting his eyes sink closed he thought on her next words, that it would be a great way to be at peace with himself and that he was only as different as he thought he was. He couldn't help but to give a little chuckle at the last part, antennae twitching a bit, "Well... I think I am quite different then the rest of our sisters but I will do my best to bridge the gap." He told her, perhaps the visit to the mother tree would help him discover exactly how to do that? He couldn't be certain but it was worth a try he decided before tilting his head back against Jerarda's shoulder so that he could look up at her, "Shall we go to visit the mother tree together? Ahhh, after I deal with my own mother of course." As much as he would love to skip that part it might be for the best if he went straight to the woman instead of trying to sneak all the way through Jauhar and then some, all the way to Aisha, without the woman hearing about him and the fact that he had returned to Jauhar. He was pretty well certain that the warrior woman would be even more upset with him if he tried to skip out on her.

At least he had time to prepare himself for the meeting though the question was, how much time? His next question to his sister being about that, "When are we wanting to head for home?" She said she didn't want to be here anymore, did that mean that she wanted to leave as soon as they were packed? He didn't mind that, more then eager to be out of the snow and back to somewhere at least a bit warmer then Zena was.

Rishima gave a little smile, antennae giving a bit of a twitch, as she offered to go with him when he had to go and face off with his mother. It really was a scary idea, having to deal with what was coming, but that she would offer to go with him helped. He leaned against her for a moment, his mismatched eyes sinking close, and he gave a smile, "Maybe, it might be nice having someone other then Itzal there when I see her next." He murmured, "I love her, I do, but that doesn't meant that I am not a little scare of her as well. Scared that I might end up stuck at home once more like a tiny Youngling."

A little squeak escaped from when Jerarda set to teasing him, something that made him give a bit of a chuckle, "I appreciate it... and I do want you to come, but I will likely need to have a sit down with her on my own once we find her." As much as he wanted to cling to Jerarda, to seek strength from his sister, he would need to actually talk with his mother on his own. Jerarda had helped him, had been the only one to hold a hand out to him and pulled him out of his dull life and into the world, allowing him to see so much. He owed her everything but he also owed his mother as well, owed her because she was the one that had raised him when his father vanished. Still, having Jerarda there on the way home would help, it would aid him in keeping himself from running which was what a part of him wanted to do at the moment. Something that he would allow himself to do.

Drawn from his deep thoughts as Jerarda set to tousling his hair Rishima gave a squeak, looking up at her, then gave a smile, "Thank you, sister." He said to her in a happy voice before he nodded when she said that they would be heading out in two days, "Yeah, will give us time to say goodbye to people." While he knew that he wasn't supposed to talk to the Shifters, that they were the enemy, he might sneak over before it was time to leave so that he could say goodbye to Chalcedony. He had been very kind to him in the past and this was likely the last time they would see each other until Jauhar where they might be considered enemies. It wasn't a thought he relished and made him hope one day that their two tribes might be able to get along so that he could be friends with Chal out in the open.

Rishima let his eyes sinking half closed for a moment in a thoughtful manner, thinking on what she was saying. She really was so nice he thought to himself, it was something that made him want to snuggle her in the same manner that he did Itzal only he worried that she might give him a thump on the head for being too cuddly. Best that he just try to keep those urges to himself, "I will do my best, I really do want to travel to Aisha with you, to see what she is like, to see what I can learn from her as well as our other sister that are going to meet with her." So long as he was allowed near to her. A part of him still feared that due to what he looked like, his coloring as well as his gender, might make it so that he wasn't permitted... but surely, because he was a Blade, they would need to let him pass? He really had no idea and figured that he could only hope for the best as far as such things were concerned.

When Jerarda mentioned that it was probably a good idea that he speak with his mother on his own he gave a smile, "I will do what I can to get her to understand." He wasn't a child any longer, he was a grown man and a Blade, he should be able to travel around Jauhar at his own leisure, to get stronger, to serve his tribe in the same way that his mother did. He wanted to get strong like she was, to be respected and loved as she was, the biggest test though to date would be the conversation with her. If she could understand even just a little that he wanted to spread his wings, so to speak, then he would be happy.

"Eh, eh? Duels?" He found himself asking, his mismatching eyes going wide, turning in Jerarda's lap to look up at her to see if she were being serious. The look on her face said it all, didn't it? She wanted the two of them to spar and he supposed that there was nothing for him to do but agree to it, huh? It was a little worrisome, he knew he wasn't anywhere as good as she was, but maybe the journey back would help him prepare not only for the conversation with his mother but also with the duels against Jerarda? He sure hoped so...

"Yeah... I really do need more practice." He said, glancing over to where Itzal was lazing around, the spear on his back along with Rishima's pack. He really did need to do more with it then solo practice. While he could learn the right way to hold it and the various motions he could make with it he really wouldn't learn any battle worthy skills on his own. With the help of his sister though he should be able to do it, right? He gave a smile and a nod at long last. A duel or three would be a good thing for him, he was a bit soft after all especially when put side by side with any of his other, stronger sisters, "I don't want my spear to grow dull so perhaps a duel or two would be a good thing." He mused, half to himself.

When Jerarda commented on how he wanted to be stronger he nodded his head in agreement, "Yes, I do want to get stronger. I want to be able to stand alongside you and our other Sister." He murmured, he didn't want to go back to doing nothing all day at home, he didn't think that he would be able to do it again. He wanted to be allowed to travel with Jerarda! If that meant dueling to sharpen his skills and to get stronger then he would do so even if it was the last thing that he really wanted to do.

He gave her a smile, "I will be sure to ready myself for our duel." He said, then gave a twitch of his antennae, "Though, given that is for when we get back home to Jauhar perhaps we should plan for things closer to the present? We need to see about getting supplies for the trip back and there aren't really any lakes that I have seen in Zena so that means no fishing this time." He said, figuring that if they had lakes here they were likely frozen over so there would be no fish to gather and smoke. That meant they would need to... what? Hunt maybe? Smoke some sort of animal, perhaps? He would look to Jerarda, to see what she thought.