[META - Ru] The Sky is Falling!

[Myrsky Syntynyt]

A Whale of a Tale

Triumphant after acquiring a sea monster's tooth, Ru and his band continue traveling along the coast, heading toward the Maestros del Mar. It is not, perhaps, what Ru would like to do next with his band, but as he still has no idea how to acquire a piece of the sky it seems the most sensible thing is to go after one of the items they do know how to get, namely a jewel from the Pirate King's hoard. The thing is, no one in the band has actually been to the pirates' territory and they don't really know what to expect.

Enter a pirate.

As the group is discussing its options, a lion perched in a nearby tree loses his balance and lands on Galning, who naturally threatens him with extermination. Thinking quickly, the lion says that he'd overheard the band's plans and, as he is no friend of the pirate king, he'll help them get into the Maestros del Mar and even help them get the treasure they seek. All he asked is that, in exchange, they please don't kill him. And also that they spend the rest of the afternoon telling stories, since they can't do much sneaking in daylight anyway.

Despite the obvious option of torturing the lion until he does what he's offered to do anyway, Ru agrees to these terms. He has gotten a good look at the lion and now has an idea that he keeps to himself. Aloud he answers that since they're a Stormborn band, it shouldn't be too challenging to spend a night telling stories, right? After all, they lead lives of violence and adventure!

Part 1|Part 2|Part 3|Part 4

 

[Myrsky Syntynyt]

How It Works

Being Stormborn, boasting is as much a part of storytelling as actually telling the story, so these stories have to be chock-full of excitement, even at the expense of truth. To that end, members of the band might want to add their own one-upping at someone else's story, just so that everyone knows they, too, are awesome.

The first lion tells a story and afterward everyone has the opportunity to say how they've seen or done or heard about something better, meaner, stronger, scarier, or whatever.

So if Toothgnasher tells a story about a seven-foot pike that tried to take his tail off, Guppynose will say something like, "Yeah, well I had a ten-foot pike actually bite me." And then Horneater will say, "Psh. That's nothing. A twelve-foot pike really did take my tail off and I had to hunt him down to get it back." Finally Kittenbreath will tell them that they're all wusses and launch into the story of how she convinced a shark to give her a ride to visit her grandmother, and after that there will be more one-upping.

 

[Myrsky Syntynyt]

OOC Notes

This RP will end one week after the GO post, or if the RP goes for 24 hours without any new posts.

There is no post order, but no new stories can be told unless two hours have passed since the last one is told, though there is as much chatter and one-upmanship allowed between stories as you all like.

Anyone may participate, even if you do not own a Stormborn on this viking. You may post as some sort of non-lined animal who is welcome to tell stories, boast, or just listen in. They're near the shore, so it could be a shore creature, but in this case it doesn't have to be. Keep in mind, though, predators will be treated as enemies.

Oh, and there may be participation incentives.

 

[Myrsky Syntynyt]

Go.

 

[Princess_Feylin]

From the moment the lion had fallen out of the tree, Ru had already begun to plot what would be done with him. It had been obvious from the very first that he would turn out to be of use to the band one way or another, if one used their imagination a little, but his claim that he could get them to the Pirate King's treasure was an unexpected bonus.

"I will begin," Ru said. "That way we can get the worst story teller out of the way first, and everything else will have to be better."

It wasn't that Ru was a bad storyteller, or that he was in the habit of using self-deprecation to ingratiate himself with his followers. He didn't believe in that nonsense. He just wanted to get his story told and out of the way so that he could spend the rest of the afternoon making plans.

"Several seasons ago I was a new reaver, my paws still sore from my first viking, and being worn sorer by the frequency with which I was called out to go viking after that. During that time I fought under a number of different captains, but mostly under Captain Nordik." So far, everything he said was perfectly true and some of the reavers present might even remember it.

"On one of the vikings led by Captain Nordik, the band found itself on a wide mountain ledge surrounded by a shrieking mob of leopards who wanted revenge for some paltry offense we'd committed on an earlier raid when three of us slaughtered a hunting party of twelve from their pride."

"We had selected the spot because it was elevated and had only one way on or off it, which as everyone knows, makes it much easier to defend against most foes. Except, of course, for foes that can climb." He waited for a moment for the import of his words to sink in. They were surrounded by leopards in a position that was defensible against non-climbing foes. But leopards, of course, are climbers.

"There were leopards below us, climbing up, and leopards at the pass we had been guarding. I was not on watch duty at the time, and so it was not my fault that we had ended up in this unsavory position. Nevertheless, with Nordik growling orders at everyone except me, I felt that it was my duty to do something to make amends for the laziness of our guard."

"Before I continue, I ought to mention that it had snowed through the night and there was enough snow on the ground to cover a lion's paw. This is important for what happens next." Ru grinned. "You see, we might have been able to hold that space indefinitely except for the fact that we were tired of being snowed on and there were a lot more leopards than reavers. Sure, we could have just stayed there and killed them all off, one by one, but we had better things to do."

"Keeping this in mind, and not having much else to do, I helped out with killing leopards that tried to climb onto our ledge, but mostly I was thinking about how we could get down other than simply walking over the bodies of the slain, since someone could twist an ankle that way, bodies being squishy and unreliable for walking on. And then it came to me. A way to get down and keep all the loot we'd already acquired."

Once more Ru paused for dramatic effect. He looked around to see if his audience was still with him. No one had interrupted him yet, so he supposed that they were.

"I told Nordik my plan, and although he was skeptical, he was every bit as eager not to spend another night freezing our balls off and fighting leopards, so he gave it the go-ahead. At that point I began lashing our together as flat as I could and then I wrapped a worn, kind of stiff hide around it. When I was finished, I'd made a kind of slide-y thing that could move over snow without sinking into it, providing there wasn't too much weight placed on it."

"I was still an adolescent at the time, and so I was the smallest one in the band, thus it fell to me to ride our booty-sled over the snow and off the ledge to draw away the leopards. I went so fast, I think two leopards' heads snapped off when they tried to watch me. Of course, the whole thing was a great success and while the leopards were chasing me the rest of the band got down and made quick work of the leopards who had stayed behind."

He waited a beat. "The end."  

[Andranis]

Princess_Feylin

Munyu listened to the story, before letting out a laugh. "Really, Ru? I find that hard to believe! I don't have any boasts to top that, since this is my first Viking, but Uncle Yu would tell you you're full of it if he were here! He told me about that Viking, and how he fought off twenty leopards on his own!" He thought about his life, and a story he could tell. After a moment, he sat up and held his paws up. "I once saw a rabbit this big!" He held his paws rather far apart. "And it had huge fangs that dripped in saliva and blood, blood-red eyes, and it would let out a HORRIBLE shriek of a roar!" He put one paw down, using the other to make a sweeping motion. "There I was, just south of the pride's border, not more than just reaching adolescence. I was out exploring the area, having escaped being cubsat...." He made a face at how coddled he was at such an age. "When I saw it... I still remember the look on its FACE as it tried to catch and eat me! I ran left, I ran right... I ducked into a hole in a tree, JUST out of reach of its huge claws! And just when I thought it was going to get me, I found the strength and courage to charge out of that tree and tackle it!" He held both paws up in fists. "It put up a really good fight, but I beat it back! And now..." He shifted, showing off the pelt on his back. "I wear its pelt as a prize for defeating it. It tasted something awful, though... I guess it had to do with eating meat, eh?"  

[Princess_Feylin]

Ru didn't mention that Yu wasn't here because that was too obvious a point to bother articulating. He just settled back and regarded Munyu with an expression that invited him to contribute something better, if he could.

"A rabbit?" he muttered incredulously. "Your great story is about being terrorized by a rabbit."

He shook his head and was very glad that his plans for the pirate did not involve the tales of this band's prowess being spread about.

"Please, somebody tell me killer rabbits aren't the most interesting thing to happen to all of you."  

[Annchen]

Halvdan had settled down on his side in a very relaxed position. He laughed and hollered in response to the stories being told. He too was fairly unimpressed by the rabid rabbit. Prey animals could be feisty, but he highly doubted that a rabbit could cause trouble for anyone but a cub.

"I've ate worse things," Halvdan said and yawned, "Have you tasted sea monster? Now that's foul."  

[Andranis]

The younger male let out a mock-scoff. "Well, remember that I haven't been out Viking before now... So the only real story I have is anything I've experienced with you all. It was getting too quiet, anyway... Though I still swear it was the biggest rabbit I'd ever seen." He folded his paws, closing his eyes in a matter-of-fact way. After a moment, he turned and looked at the blue vulture preening on his back. "And what about YOU, you got a story oh mighty little vulture?" He reached up, giving her a poke. What was her name again...? Oh, yes. "Nondo..."

The vulture looked up, blinking at the question. She then peered at Halvdan. "Sea monster not worst tasting thing." She gave a flick of her wing, motioning into the savannahs. "Two month old dead hyena, now THAT smell bad and taste bad! Nondo sick for days!" She then started preening on Munyu, much to the lion's chagrin, before she looked up again. "Lions have silly stories!" She clacked her beak in amusement. "Try something better! You eat two month old dead hyena? Meat all dry, hard to pick at!" Never mind how it could have lasted that long. But her time could have been completely off, too.  

[wooga Paes]

"Two month old bodies don't smell bad." Aluka pointed out, finally deciding to speak up. There just wasn't much left to smell on bodies so old, with how dry they were, and exposure to the elements. It would probably just smell like everything around it with a vague hint of...something else, if someone really took a strong whiff. And anyways, it would be a miracle there was any meat to be eaten! Aluka had never seen meat last long, vultures were usually quick, and aside form them there were still many scavengers.

Not being born into the pride, this sort of gathering and storytelling left Aluka a bit out of her element. She had never been on vikings or gone on fantastic, strange adventures. But once she got the gist of it, the thrall figured she could manage. Her grandfather was the god of Deception, after all. "I've got better than a bunny." Munyu's story had at least been amusing, but like Halvdan, she simply could not take a threatening rabbit seriously.

"Where I grew up we had this lake. And in it we there was monster. He was a crocodile, he was as long as a giraffe is tall and as heavy as an elephant. He could eat a lion whole – and he did. Many times. I had a cousin who got eaten by him, but he really went too far when he swallowed me." She shook her head. Evidently a big mistake for the (fictitious) crocodile.

"See, I didn't like it very much in there, and he made the mistake of not chewing his food. So naturally, I clawed my way out. He couldn't really do much about it, since I was inside him and all. So I claw my way out and I cut through his belly, and next thing you know it's giant crocodile for dinner. Fed the entire pride, but you can bet I ate the most of that b*****d."  

[Annchen]

Quote:

"Better not get into an eating contest with a vulture," he commented dryly, "I was in a mint contest with an elephant once and I had a headache for three days. But I was the last one standing."

Halvdan laughed at the tale of the crocodile swallowing more than it could chew. He enjoyed the tall tale, and had to admit that Aluka was a good storyteller. Ru's ragtag group was starting to feel like a proper band out on a regular viking. However, liking the crocodile story didn't stop him from trying to convince everyone he had seen worse.

"I've seen a crocodile swallow an elephant in two bites," Halvdan boasted, "Your monster-crocodile sounds small in comparison."

He had done a lot of boasting and not a lot of storytelling of his own, but Halvdan was waiting for the right moment to share his story. Oh, yes. He had a good one!

Quote:

"Stupid lion!"

The sound came from above, but all that the lions below could be seen was a few branches moving in the tree above. A genet that had been napping in the tree had been disturbed by the chatting and boasting below. She was usually active at night and was very cranky to wake up like this. Perhaps she could scare them off? They had no business sitting under her tree anyway!

"I eat crocodile! I eat lion!" the voice said, failing to sound very frightening. "Now go away!"

 

[Princess_Feylin]

Ru had laughed at Aluka's tale of being eaten by a crocodile and then slashing her way out. He didn't believe a word of it, but he'd enjoyed it. It had been better than his story, certainly, but he really didn't care about that in the slightest.

It wasn't as if this was a competition. It was a way to pass the time, and to give Ru an opportunity to cement his plans. At some point he would have to pull aside one of his reavers, perhaps Don, and share his thoughts with him. Under the noise of everyone else's storytelling and mirth, perhaps.

"I didn't know elephants ate mint," Ru said. "Are you sure you weren't just seeing elephants because of how much mint you ate?"

The interruption by a preybeast of some kind forestalled any further ragging on his reavers as he shifted to fix it with a terrifying glower. He'd learned to tolerate the vulture that had attached itself to Munyu, but that didn't mean he was thrilled to hear input from every creature with a voice.  

[Andranis]

The vulture clacked her beak, looking up into the trees. "Nondo eat all that, but Nondo vulture - Vulture eat anything laying around!" She then paused, tilting her head as it clicked that someone had addressed her tale of an old carcass. "Maybe it two week... It long ago, Nondo not remember well old dead thing." She gave a wave of her wing, as if dismissing it, then shifted to a better position on Munyu's back. "Elephants eat anything green. Nondo see elephant eat MEAT once! Now THAT funny sight!" She then shuddered. "Elephant go mad after that, though, make big crashing in trees..."

"Now hold on, I can believe the crocodile eating an elephant thing..." Munyu stretched out, making himself more comfortable. "When I was a cub, I went digging near a river... I found a crocodile skull buried deep down in the dirt, it alone was as big as the biggest lion back home! I couldn't even begin to imagine how big the BODY was! It looked long dead, mind you..." He shuddered, happy for this fact. He did NOT want to meet a crocodile that big.  

[Ravvlet]

The noise of their conversation hadn't just upset the nearby arboreal residents. A dense pile of loamy sand near the group of chatting lions-et-al shifted ever so slightly. A bit of freshly-grown grass clumped off the uncertain turf as something nudged its way out ponderously. At first, it just looked like another chunk of dirt, but as bits of sand sloughed off it revealed itself to be the wrinkled and scaly visage of a very large tortoise.

"You."

It croaked the word ever so slowly, pausing for many seconds afterward.

"Younglings." Its annunciation was almost painfully unhurried, but the derision in its voice was clear. It gave a long, rattling sigh and lumbered placidly to its feet, sending soil and rocks cascading to the ground in a steady, hissing stream.

"Crocs. In ocean," it wheezed, dragging out the syllables.

"...Much. Bigger. Saw one. As hatchling..." As it droned on, it started to dig out a little divet next to it's previous one with its large, horny forelimbs. "Size of. Two elephants."

It dug in silence for few seconds more, before pausing to crane its long, serpentine neck back at the group of apex predators. If it feared for its life, it didn't seem to show it. Its beak gaped in amusement, and it emitted brief coughing sounds.

It was laughing.

"Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Two elephants..." It settled into its new, shallow basin, turning toward the lions and drawing its head and limbs back into its shell.

Before its face disappeared underneath, it added, "That is... Almost. Three. Ha... ha... ha..."  

[Princess_Feylin]

For the first few tales and boasts Skremmende Galning had been content to listen. Well, mostly. Ru's story had gone on and on and he had lost track of it at points, but the ending seemed to be something about building a sled and knocking off some leopards' heads. Too much build up for too little excitement, in Galning's less than humble opinion.

"Gah!" he exclaimed, springing to his feet as he realized that the odd smelling mound he'd been resting near was not, in fact, an earthen mount at all, but a talking earthen mound. Just the sort of thing not to sit near if a fellow didn't want to end up sprouting tails from his ears and whiskers from his arse.

He stalked huffily to sit down beside Inyoni, where he didn't think he was likely to encounter any further talking bits of foliage. Even if they were just tortoises, as this one had turned out to be. Also, she was the only non-Thrall female on this viking and Galning had half a mind to see if he could convince her to sleep with him at some point.

"Huh? What?"

As with Ru, the tortoise had simply taken too long to get to his point and Galning had lost interest and focus before he reached it. In fact, by the time the tortoise finished speaking its piece Galning had forgotten how it had begun.

A part of him wondered how a group of obviously fierce Stormborn lions kept managing to attract other animals who were clearly intended only to be killed as prey. Didn't these stupid animals have any sense of self-preservation at all? Not that Galning had any plans to try to take on that tortoise's shell. But really!