<P> Aquarian (Eiji/Xun Jiang) [FIN]

[shibrogane]

Eiji was born a perfectly normal girl, except for the beautiful pearl she held in her hands. It was later that she grew horns, and then a tail, and though that wasn't normal for most people, it was normal at home. At fifteen, she should have been able to turn to a dragon entire, but she wasn't, and every lesson from her parents failed. The most she could do was hide the tail, and even that didn't always work...

"Maybe the blood's too diluted," her father said, braiding Eiji's long ash-brown hair down her back. "It has been thirty-four generations."

"But we're both ryuko," her mother said, "It makes no sense that it should dilute."

"Perhaps inbreeding," said Eiji's father, and they left it at that. He tied off her hair with a strip of leather and patted her shoulders.

Was it really any surprise that she'd decided to leave? Her cousins, her parents, all of them could become dragons just as easily as they breathed, and Eiji, well. She couldn't, and she wanted to know why.

So. She left, and now she had tracked stories of dragon gods across worlds, because since the near-end of the world everyone at home had been convinced of the gods' returns. If she could find the god who'd begun her line, maybe she could get an answer as to why she, and she alone, was broken.

But now that she'd finally found the source of all the rumors and the stories, she didn't know what to do. She brushed the end of her braid along her chin, chewed her lip and stared up at the imposing building. And it felt wrong to approach a god, even if he was her great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-grandfather, in sneakers, jeans and a hoodie. She put one foot on the bottom step, hesitated. What if she was wrong, what if she was misinformed, there were a million ways this could go wrong.

She was so close, and she needed the answers that this dragon--her grandparent or not--might have. So she climbed the stairs, uncertainly circling the wide-open spaces. "Hello," she called, uncertainly, her accented voice echoing oddly back to her. "Hello?"  

[A Wandering Esper]

Eiji was lucky and unlucky all at once. Unlucky that the person she would run into was not the dragon she sought, but quite lucky that he would be able to bring the young girl to the individual she sought.

Aysu had left to run some errands when he heard the unfamiliar voice, and turned, heading toward the stairs just as the young girl was headed up them. The first thing that struck him was the tail and the horns sitting delicately on top of the lady's head, and he could swear his heart skipped a beat.

She looked just like... But no, that was impossible­. He had traveled far and large, first out of sorrow and then to seek a new host for his lord, and he had seen a ryuko in ages...

"Hello ?"  

[shibrogane]

The voice startled her, for all she'd been listening for a response; she turned, blue-violet eyes seeking, and finding, the speaker. "Hello," she said, lamely repeating her greeting now that there was a person to actually greet. "Are you... this is the Pantheon, isn't it?" She gestured, spreading her palms out before her as she indicated the tall pillars and the open pools, the green grass all around them and the tea pavilions not that far off. Then she folded her hands before her, a demure gesture more suited to a young woman in traditional dress than someone in a hoodie declaring that they came to dance.

Going out on a limb, she said, "I seek Xun Jiang. One of the Dragon Kings? I have... a question for him."  

[A Wandering Esper]

"Yes, this is the pantheon." Aysu nodded, waiting for the young lady to speak and not asking questions. It was, ultimately, the name she used that made him certain. His lord had many names - every gods did - but before, he had been Kawagiri to most. The name Xun Jiang was the name the lord's closest children had used...

"....You are a ryuko, arn't you ?" Part of him still could not believe it. There was a ryuko right there, and of course, his Lord would not know, would not remember...

Xun Jiang had not remembered him, and some days it seemed for the best.

"I can take you to him." Aysu nodded. "But I must warn you... He will likely not remember. About your people. He does not remember a thing." He sighed. "But if he can aid you, I am certain that he will."  

[shibrogane]

He knew what she was? Eiji stiffened, staring at the long-eared man fixedly. How did he know? Her people kept themselves secret, it was why they'd learned to hide in human flesh in the first place. Why expose yourself to unnecessary danger by exposing what made you special, her parents had reasoned, although when she'd been small she'd believed that her special powers were something to share. It was only when they'd neglected to give her the most important power...

"I am," she said. Sort of, she said in her head. They'd made it clear that she couldn't call herself one of them if she lacked her people's most distinctive power. "And... that's fine. It probably won't change anything, anyway." What kind of god forgot his children, she asked herself, but that wasn't really a question to pose to... whoever this was. She bit her lip again, chewing the end of her braid for a moment. "It probably won't be fixed." Pessimistic, maybe. But pessimism had served her well.  

[A Wandering Esper]

Aysu nodded. "I am Aysu... aoide and servant to Ti Lung. I worked closely with your ancestors, before..." Before everything went wrong, but he could not bring himself to say it. She would figure it out for herself soon enough.

"Come with me, then ?" He asked as he retraced his steps back to to a door ornate with the shape of a large tree, and slipped inside with her.  

[shibrogane]

Aoide was a term she wasn't familiar with, but servant was clear enough, and she thought there might have been a few stories about the one before her--she smiled uncertainly, and offered a neat bow before she followed him. "It is good to meet you, Aysu," she said, but she couldn't say anything about the claim to have served with her ancestors. Not until she looked into that lore.

"It's strange to be here," she told the elfin man's back, awkwardly. "It's very far from home, but I suppose I always knew it would be. Gods could hardly come back on Earth; the mortals don't believe in anything, really." Silence wasn't her favorite thing; she couldn't stand listening to it, she just really. Did not like it. "Well, I suppose they believe in things, individually, but the Gods died a long time ago, for them. Before they disappeared, even. I've made a study of it, from our libraries." Which went very far back, which she supposed Aysu would know. "I didn't have much else to do."

She fell silent when they passed through the door, though it was not really her way. Whatever they found, she resolved to treat it normally. She was ryuko, a child of dragons, and she'd grown up with strangeness. She would prove herself in that, at least.  

[A Wandering Esper]

The girl was talkative, but he did not mind that. "No, they did not... And that is true. The gods died." He sighed. "That is why he does not remember... We are lucky to have him at all." Especially since the first host had ended in failure... But he would not mention that. Could not.

But Ti Lung was so determined to learn the past... This might very well be the first step. He led Eiji through the winding paths of greenery and lush trees, until he reached where he had last seen his master - the lake. "My lord, you have a visitor."

The potion had worn out this morning and Xun Jiang was quite certain that he had never been so happy to have tail and wings in his entire rebirth. Either way, he had been busy with a good swim when Aysu's voice called out for him.

"Aysu ? I thought you were headed for the market ?" He blinked, turning back to look at the two of them. "And who might you be ?" He smiled.  

[shibrogane]

It really was not as terrifyingly strange as the lore had led her to believe. She'd expected a palace, but instead she was chaperoned through a beautiful park in full bloom. Was this really indoors? She hadn't seen anything like this on the outside, but she knew there were things such as hyperspace storage; hyperspace rooms did not seem that far out of mind.

She was introduced to a strangely ambiguous person with dragon wings and tail; some of her people could manifest wings, but it came with the true transformation, and so Eiji never had. Being envious of her own ancestor was ridiculous, so she hated that she burned with envy of Xun Jiang's clear draconic traits. Now wasn't the time to think of the things that her disability had deprived her of; she had other skills, skills that had made it possible for her to track this Dragon King down. She didn't have to be a dragon in every way that counted to have worth.

"My name is Mizushima Eiji," she said. "I am your granddaughter, though I've been told this is something you don't remember." She paused, and said, "We are separated by thirty-four generations, but the gods appreciate conciseness, or so I've heard." There was a subtle challenge there, if Xun Jiang wanted to look; its subtlety lay not in purpose, but in the challenge's accidental nature. Her doubt--could she really have found the Dragon King who had fathered her thirty-three times grandfather--manifested, in words that asked, are you truly a god?  

[A Wandering Esper]

...His... What ?

Yes, it was clear enough that Aysu had told the truth on this aspect - Xun Jiang clearly had no damn idea what Eiji was going on about. The Dragon King looked at Aysu, as if to ask for clarification. I.... had children ?

Aysu simply nodded. What Eiji had said was true.

...He had children. He had children and he never remembered. Was this...

...Was this what he felt had been so important ? The one thing he had reached out for all this time ?

...Well, he could think on this, later. This was not quite the right time to ponder this. He had company, after all. And so he rose from the water completely. "I am pleased to meet you, Eiji." He wanted to reach out, hug her - but was that really such a wise idea ? He had not even known about her existence seconds ago ! But, deep in his heart, he knew what his memories had forgotten. The challenge had not gone unnoticed, but what could he do to prove himself, other than being himself ?

So in the end, he gave in - and pulled Eiji close to himself, hugging her. "...Welcome home then, Eiji."  

[shibrogane]

She watched the silent exchange, itching to say something, anything, to break the silence, but if nothing else ancestral respect was important to her people. Aysu looked like he might be her age--her apparent age, not her true age--and it was alright to ramble, but you didn't mouth off to ancestors.

You did let them hug you, even when they were soaking wet. She had dragon blood, she'd practically grown up in the water, so she let him hug her, even uncertainly hugging him in return. "I am... glad to be here," she ventured. This isn't a social visit, she told herself, and she also told herself: He wouldn't greet me so warmly if he knew. Even her parents had been displeased; oh, they loved her, but there was only so much she could do within the family if she couldn't become a dragon and watch over the waters of the world like everyone else. Having a daughter who knew all the lore would be excellent, if she could also become a dragon like the rest of them... "But I didn't intend this to be a purely social visit."

Oh, yes. She needed answers, and she needed help, and she would have never sought out Xun Jiang if she hadn't required those things. Even just knowledge as to her own, personal defect would be welcome. She could work towards a cure on her own from there if she had to, if he couldn't fix it...

"You see, I'm... not right," she said, uncertainly, waiting for the flinch. "I thought..." But if he didn't remember they even existed, how could he know what made her different than all the others? Her face flushed red and she looked away, mumbling, "...I suppose it was a stupid idea, anyway." Louder, she added, "Nevermind."  

[A Wandering Esper]

The flinch that Eiji was expecting simply never came. Instead, Ti Lung only looked confused. Not right ? Why should she think that ? Eiji looked perfectly fine to him.

"No, please." He said, finally letting go of her. "Tell me. If this was so important to you that you came all this way to see me, then I wish to hear it." Maybe he could not help. That was possible. He was far from full power, and it was becoming just the slightest bit irritating. Xun Jiang had to sharply remind himself to be patient - a lesson harshly learned - but he could not help the feeling that he was stagnating.

At least now the irritation came from the tangible present, rather than endless what-could-have-beens. This was an improvement, as far as he was concerned.  

[shibrogane]

Eiji hesitated, looking to Aysu; Xun Jiang might not know that her problem was, in fact, a problem, but Aysu seemed to remember what it meant to be ryuko. She backed away, tucked her hands into the sleeves of her hoodie. Of course, that would deform them, but it was a nervous habit that she didn't even want to fight right at that moment. "My people--" A false start. She swallowed heavily, bowed nervously. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to claim what's yours. Your people, descended from the ancient dragons, we can take the form of..." Still avoiding eye contact, she shrugged uncomfortably. "Well, dragons. All of us can."

She didn't think spelling it out would be necessary, but because she hated silence, she admitted it, haltingly: "Except me. I can't. I never have been able to. The elders, that is, my grandparents, and my great-aunts and great-uncles, all of them tried to show me how to reach the power that makes the transformation happen, but they couldn't find it." And if that did not make it clear enough, she said, "They couldn't make me right."

There was just a momentary pause as Eiji looked back to her many-times great-grandfather, deep blue eyes searching his face for any sign of rejection or hope or--something, she didn't know. Because of what she saw--or despite of it, she said, "I don't know if you meant this when you... made us, or sired us, or whatever you did, and I guess you don't either anymore, but there is literally nothing I can do without being able to take a dragon form. We don't really talk to people and we don't do human careers but I couldn't do anything else so I left, I thought, if I found you you'd know why I'm broken--" She cut herself off, face red with humiliation. She hadn't wanted to go and appear pathetic, but real anguish had slipped into her voice near the end, and she knew she had to calm down.

She took a few deep breaths, and said, "But you don't remember anything. So I guess... how can you know what's wrong?"  

[A Wandering Esper]

Xun Jiang now had the feeling that he had some grandchildren to b***h-slap. Broken ? Really ? He did not see her as broken, not that all.

That frustration had to come from somewhere... Maybe it stemmed from from her own frustration, but it did not sound like her family had been all that supportive if she had felt the need to run away like that.

The idea that she had been made to feel so worthless was breaking his heart. The rejection Eiji feared so badly never came. Instead, he crouched down to be at (roughly) eye level, one hand rising to run through what was left unbraided of her hair. That always seemed to help calm Adi, at least.

"No, I do not know what is wrong." He admitted, frowning. Surely... surely he could not have willingly meant it like this. "But I know how you feel. When I was reborn... I could not remember my own scales. I reached out for them, but I could not even remember what I was even reaching for." He remembered it well, the blind panic. The look of pure terror on Tian Yue's face when he admitted the fact. "You are not broken, Eiji."

If she was broken, then he was only mere shards.

"Maybe the mana diluted with time." He had been dead and gone, after all. He had not had any mana to live himself, much less to provide to his own children. That it had lasted so long seemed remarkable in itself. "The fault is mine, and not yours. If it is the mana then I..." Could he, really ? Poking out a wellspring was still harder that it should have been. There has been progress... But was it truly enough. "...When I am more myself, I will make up for this. All of it." His hand moved to trace loose circles on Eiji's cheek with the flat side of one nail. "I will find a way. I will give you the prettiest scales, shining brightly like the lining of an abalone shell. You will be a lovely wyrm, slender and agile. You will swim with me and they will realize how mistaken they were for ever making you feel like this." It just was not right. It did not sit right with him at all.

He had done this once. He would find a way to do this again. "Right now, through... No, I am the one that is broken, Eiji. It takes nearly all my strength to create a wellspring... If I could do this right now, I would."  

[shibrogane]

It wasn't something she would have told anyone else; Eiji was prideful as hell, all of her kind were, but this was the progenitor of almost everyone she'd known as a child. They all harkened back to Xun Jiang and his brethren, the Dragon Kings of old lore, and if there was anyone she could tell about her predicament, anyone who could help, it would have been him. She had hoped, but in all the scenarios she'd imagined, her thirtyfour-times grandfather forgetting about her entire people hadn't factored in at all. Not thought of, maybe, she'd considered that--that he just might not be interested in them anymore. But forgotten completely...

She did calm when he ran a hand over her hair; even in its complex braid, the ash-brown locks were still impressively long. She untucked her hands to grab on to the end of her braid, watching Xun with blue-violet eyes gone wide with surprise.

Another thing she had not accounted for was compassion.

"You didn't," she asked, in a small voice; something in her rejected that, said, you're almost forty years old, you might look like a teenager but you're not, but even so she was extremely young for her kind, and no one had commiserated with her over her brokenness before. "You truly didn't?" If Xun Jiang had forgotten his scales, maybe hers were just lost. Maybe she could get them back, and be a true dragon like he said. If it were just the mana diluting... there might not be enough for a whole new dragon to come into being. Ryuko children were rare, a new one arriving only perhaps every one hundred years; all of her cousins were well into their hundreds, and there she was, nowhere near.

The promise was calming. She wouldn't stop looking for other solutions; through her travels and on her search, she'd learned much about the many worlds, and had explored many avenues that might have given her a wyrm's shape. None of them had panned out, but that didn't mean one of them wouldn't, someday.

"Do you mean it," she asked, "I'm not... I'm not broken?" If it wasn't a problem with her... she hardly dared hope that she wasn't the product of diluted blood, that she was truly everything she was supposed to be, just lost... "I..." She paused, crinkled up her nose, and sniffled a bit--even if she hadn't shed a tear, that didn't mean her eyes hadn't watered. "I don't know what to call you."