[PRP] Begging for Forgiveness (Lizzy/Mac/Hel)

[Enoh Love]

Okay, he had to do it now.

Any longer and it would be too close to Prom. The situation was bad enough as it was, even without Prom being their anniversary of sorts. Telling her right before it made it seem worse, and that just wasn't okay to him. As promised he had texted Hel, alerting her to his plans. She insisted, he didn't want her to be there, but what they had done was good enough Blackmail for him to consider actually listening to her for once.

He waited outside of the Demon Dorms for Hel, and after a very brief, very awkward conversation he headed upstairs with her. Every step felt heavy, as though someone was filling his boots with lead; his heart hurt, his head spun, his mouth was dry; he didn't want to do this. Ignorance was bliss, his mind argued; but Hel wouldn't have it. The part of him that promised to be honest with Lizzy wouldn't have it.

He had no choice.

Mac gave one last glance back towards Hel, as if checking to make sure that she wasn't going to let him change his mind, and then reached out to knock on the door. "Lizzy, you in? I -uh, we, need to talk. To, uh, you."

Smooth.  

[Lucyal]

Every step towards the Demon Dorms made her chest tighten. Ugh. This was going to be hard, but doing the right thing was hardly ever easy. Thank Jack Mac texted, or she really would have kicked his a**. After meeting up with Mac, she clapped the Psychopomp on the shoulder in what she hoped was an encouraging gesture, and trailed in after him. Not only was she there to own up as well, but to make sure Mac went through with it.

It was the least they could do.

Hel was silent during the trek, and as Mac knocked on the door she rested her hands on her hips, her expression solemn.  

[Dragain]

"UH, COMING."

She sounded panicked, and there was the sound of things being shuffled from behind the door - namely, her prom outfit, as well as minipets Rosenthal and Jimmy, were shoved into her closet. It would be a shame if the surprise was ruined for Mac! She even made the dress a color she wouldn't normally wear, just to match his; prom was something she was really looking forward to... And she really did not want the minipets to bother anyone.

Opening the door, she was surprised to find both Mac and Hel there, giving the former a peck on his cheek, and the latter an affectionate hug; this explained what Mac meant by 'we' need to talk, rather than 'I'.

"Hi!" She greeted them both, although soon frowned when she realized how glum they looked, "Um... Is everything alright?"  

[Enoh Love]

Guilt hit him like a cannon to the stomach when she answered the door, giving him a little kiss and Hel a hug. Uuugh damn. This was...this wasn't going to be good. He was going to lose her, he just knew it. Reaching out he took her hand, linking his fingers shamelessly in hers, and drew her more into her room, to her bed where he sat her down.

"Okay I'm just...going to get this over with, like a bandaid." He said out loud, more to himself than the two ghouls in the room with him. With every passing moment he felt like his heart would thump right out of his chest; but not before his stomach twisted into literal knots. There was no backing out now; Lizzy was already curious, and Hel was at his back. If he didn't say anything, Hel would, and somehow that would be worse.

Why did he bring her along, again?

"Lizzy, I...er, we..." He glanced over his shoulder at Hel, guilt evident in his dark eyes. "...Made a very big mistake last night." Mac spoke slowly, as if every word was a battle; but after this point, it somehow seemed easier. "We were drinking, and...one thing...lead to another..." Nope, still difficult. For all his bravado, he just couldn't bring himself to outright say it, not to Lizzy. Sweet, trusting, beautiful Lizzy. "I slept with her." He emphasized the word, hoping she'd not go into that little place of naive denial in her head.  

[Lucyal]

As soon as she heard Lizzy’s voice, it felt like a countdown…where nothing good would happen as soon as it reached zero.

The hug just made it worse, but Hel patted the spider demoness’ back regardless, watching as Mac linked hands with her afterwards with a small sigh and followed in after the two, softly closing the door behind her. They definitely didn’t need anyone to uh…overhear what was about to be said. As Lizzy was sat on the bed, Hel stood next to Mac, taking a quiet, deep breath as he started. Like a band aid…it was best, really. The reaper had a grim resolve to see this through, for once her emotions feeling a little more in check and level than Mac’s, certainly. She knew what she needed to owe up too, whether it was good or bad.

The ghoul nodded her head as he started, trying to encourage him to keep going, and then shifted her gaze over to Lizzy. Hel frowned a bit, her brows furrowing as Mac said slept with…come on. Hel knew Lizzy long enough…she could completely mistake that for…less than what it was. While Mac may have started to peel the band aid…it seemed Hel would be the one to finally rip it off. It wouldn’t do to prolong this anymore than it needed to be. She cleared her throat, her tone solemn but firm.

“Slept as in had sex.” She paused. Oh. Ouch. Okay. It was definitely out there now. The reaper didn’t flinch as she looked at the ghoul. “…I am truly sorry, Lizzy.”  

[Dragain]

She smiled when Mac took her hand, trying to ignore the feeling that something bad is about to happen, especially when he turned serious all of a sudden. The fact that Hel was there made her confused, although she didn't ask why; after all, she was probably going to find out-

"Slept with?" She echoed, her first instinct being to wonder if Mac meant he slept beside Hel; the denial was there, but then she remembered that this was Mac... And that Mac wasn't the type of person to say 'slept with', and literally meant slept with. When Hel confirmed it, she froze, and then pulled her hand away from Mac, as if she had been holding onto a hot iron this whole time.

She opened her mouth to say something, but nothing came out. Instead, tears welled up in her eyes as she inched away from both Mac and Hel, unable to look at them. Unable to comprehend why they would do something like that to her, when she saw them both as good friends.

"W-why?" She managed to choke out, covering her face with her hands, pulling her legs up to her chest as she sobbed, "I-it's... Our... It's our... O-one ye-ar..." Her sobbing covered up whatever she was trying to say.  

[Enoh Love]

There it was, the reaction he had been dreading.

His heart constricted painfully as she pulled her hand from his, only to have it sink further as she moved away from him. Yes, there it was. He was losing her. As she started to cry, be began to seriously consider going to Shun to force the other Reaper to make good on his promise; if done enough times, it might be permanent, right? He thought about it, but knew he couldn't bring himself to actually do it.

Their one year. Yes, it was. Uuugh.

"I know, I know! I'm...so sorry." Mac said weakly, an unfamiliar terror rising in his throat. "It was a mistake, we really didn't mean to, but...it happened, and I as much as I want to, I can't take it back." He shifted closer to her on the bed, knowing he'd done something unspeakably terrible but still willing to quietly beg for forgiveness. This wasn't the first time he had done something like this, but this was the first time he felt remorse for his actions. Incredibly remorse, that threatened to choke the life out of him.

"I'm so, so sorry..." He carefully extended a hand, trying to get permission to touch her again.
 

[Lucyal]

Hel had been expecting…shock…anger…but that…and the tears. It was like a kick to the gut. <******** could only stand there and watch this play out. Could only watch as Mac tried reaching out to Lizzy and hope that she wouldn’t do or say anything further to crush him. Oh…gods…they wouldn’t end over this, would they? She didn’t want to be the cause of that at all. One year anniversary? Jack damn it. Hel just went through all the cursing and belittling of herself in her head. She couldn’t approach Lizzy right now…or say anything else at the moment. It wasn’t her place…and what could she say or do for her now?

Nothing.  

[Dragain]

"You k-knew, and yet you-" She looked up, staring at his outstretched hand; the thought that he had touched Hel with those same hands when he was supposed to be hers made her sick, and she couldn't help but inch away again. She looked from the hand, to Mac, and then to Hel, before looking at Mac again, staring them both straight in the eye.

What about Mot? Her big brother, the boil who looked like he was going to die from heartache when she visited him that day. The boil who probably loved Hel more than he loved himself.

How long had they been apart? A few days?

"I'm so disappointed," She whispered, looking away again, still unable to look at them without being reminded that they had spent an intimate night together. Without being reminded that she had just been betrayed by two people she loved, one of whom she had given he rmany firsts to, "In both of you."  

[Enoh Love]

His fingers curled in, his hand sinking as if weighted.

"I know." He murmured again. "I am too, in myself." He admitted easily, taking her cues and sliding to sit again on the edge of her bed, leaning his face into his hands for a moment. Euuugh. He really was the worst; cheated on his ghoulfriend whom he loved, with a ghoul who was his close friend. The Reaper rubbed his face and then dropped his hands, his gaze still firmly on the ground.

"I promised I'd tell you the truth, to not hide anything from you...no matter how painful it is for either of us." He shifted just enough to look at her over his shoulder, not even bothering to try and mask just how much guilt he felt, how disappointed in himself that he was. "So here I am, not hiding anything from you...and ********, it hurts. I can't even imagine how you feel..." And that hurts even worse. His head dropped again, his hand coming up to grip the fabric over his heart. "I wasn't thinking. I'm sorry." He'd keep saying it, and he meant it every since time.  

[Lucyal]

Hel didn’t shy away from Lizzy’s gaze, and stared right back at the ghoul when she looked at her. Listening to her and Mac go back and forth more and more was hard. It was painfully awkward and the air just seemed to get more oppressive the longer she stood there equally awkward with her hands on her hips. She didn’t want to leave if it felt like she still needed to be here, but maybe they’d want to be alone? She didn’t know right now…it was hard to read into the situation at the moment.

“As you have every right to be.” Hel murmured back at Lizzy. “I acted selfishly without regard to any consequences and I am once again, truly sorry.”  

[Dragain]

"This is one truth that didn't need to happen," She replied, tears rolling down her cheeks as she stared at the floor, her voice shaking; she should be angry and upset, but all she felt was crushing disappointment, "But it did... And how am I supposed to react? What am I supposed to do? Would you like to teach me? You're more experienced with relationships, after all."

Her sobbing was starting up again, as she wiped her eyes with the back of her hand.

"I'm not the only one you should be apologizing to. One day, it's going to come back to haunt you," She looked at the ghoul, making eye contact; she hoped that the reaper knew who she was talking about; she was so silly... To think that just a few days ago, she had told Mot that one day, he would be ready to woo her again. Naive. She was naive, and she was stupid.

Pausing briefly, she turned to look at Mac, her eyes moist and bloodshot. She probably looked terrible from all that crying, but she could care less right now, "Hel, would you mind leaving us alone please? I would like to talk to Mac."  

[Enoh Love]

He couldn't bring himself to answer those questions; he'd never been on that side of this type of relationship. He had been cheated on, but he didn't care enough to react other than It's over; this was the first mistake of this sort he'd ever made that he wanted to fix, and was willing to go to the human world and back to do it.

Instead of saying anything he just stayed quiet, knowing quite well he was in the metaphorical dog house. He did, however, cast a glance at Hel; as promised, he wasn't going to apologize to her, in voice or expression. Black eyes found the ground again, and he merely waited for her to leave, to hear what Lizzy had to say.  

[Lucyal]

Hel had been fine to stay as she was. Quiet after she apologized because she had done something wrong and she knew Lizzy had every right to be upset…but as soon as Lizzy locked eyes with her again and brought up Mot, that resolve to not say anything snapped. Her brows furrowed and her expression hardened.

“Of course you would take his side.” She replied, her tone terse. “Do not lecture me about mistakes coming back to haunt me, Lizzy. I know, but you remember this.” She pointed a finger at her. “He let go of me. He stopped trying.” Okay. Time to get out now. Hel met Mac’s glance, and while she did not apologize, her look to the Psychopomp said one thing:

Good luck.

Hel turned then and made her way to the door, but paused with her hand on the handle. She apparently had another two seeds to add in before she left. She looked back over her shoulder at Lizzy. “If you really love him…you will forgive him.” That being said, Hel opened the door and stepped out into the hall, closing it behind her as she made the lone trip back to the reaper dorms.  

[Dragain]

"He had never really stopped trying," She replied, sounding angry for the first time since they stepped into her room, but saying nothing more since they were not here to discuss Mot and Hel. They were here to discuss Mac and Lizzy; it was a good thing they didn't name that boat Mazzy.

Hel's parting words made her flinch, and she was close to tears again as she resisted the urge to reply with 'If he really loved me, he wouldn't have cheated on me'. When the door closed, she kept silent, staring at the floor; he had already said everything that he wanted to say to her, and apologized several times... However, an apology - or ten - would not turn back time.

"I do love you, you know?" She finally spoke, her voice barely a whisper, "I still do, but when I think about... You having touched Hel with those same hands that you used to touch me? I just want to push you away, and take a shower." And cry, cry a lot.

"A long time ago, when I was still concerned about the fact that you've had... Bedded other ghouls before me, Junko told me that I shouldn't be bothered, because those ghouls belonged to your past. They no longer matter to you now, but I do," She continued, tearing up again as she hugged her legs closer to her chest, "A-and I thought... I thought that if I tried my best to be a good ghoulfriend to you, then I wouldn't ever have to become one of the people in your past. That I wouldn't have to ever be jealous of anyone again, because the same way I belong to you, you would belong to me."

She inhaled sharply, "Why... W-why... Didyouhavetogoprovemewrong."