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Posted: Wed Apr 18, 2012 9:40 pm
(LONG overdue log XD)
Rosciel: The walk back up to their dorms was spent in complete silence. Rosc hadn't said anything because he felt as if there was a fragile bubble around them, if he said something the spell would be broken and she would pull away from him, trying to be brave. And Sin... he was sure she had her reasons for not saying anything. He had been content to support her, he had even cautiously wrapped his arm around her waist to help her some more. Cautious once more because his fear of pushing her away was back. He needed to kill it before it hurt him, but right then it was still gnawing at the back of his mind.
They were at her door long before he wanted to be.
Sin: Sin was quiet, quiet because she could still feel the tears, because she was still guilty. At least no one else was around, that helped, except for Rosc...but he already knew her facades. She lifted a hand to try and remove the evidence of her pain. She relaxed a bit as she felt Rosc's arm around her waist, she leaned against him because her legs were shaking under her. The strength she had found to race through the portal, to survive this long, was finally spent. She was tired, so tired, but she still had so much to do.
She had to call her mother of course...tell her what had happened. She had to find some leggings to cover the horrible bruises that were forming all over her legs. She was afraid she had done some serious damage to her ankle, that would need to be wrapped at least. She really wanted a long hot soak in her bathtub, she might have to put her Unmentionables in the closet for peace and quiet.
Her door was suddenly infront of them and Sin looked at Rosc hesitantly. She looked back at the door at the triple 9's as if they had somekind of answer to what she should do.
"I'm...sure you're tired...but...but you could come in?" She finally said it because she didn't want to be alone yet. She was so afraid still, her fingers slid down to her pendant and she gripped it tight...protection.
Rosciel: "I'm not tired," Rosc replied softly. It wasn't a lie, not completely. His body was exhausted, but being with her gave him new energy and he couldn't leave her yet. He needed to tell her... so many things. And he wanted to care for her, to comfort her. The worst part of it all was that, when it all came down to it, he truly didn't know how. He could do his best to help the pain in her legs, her ankle must be hurting so much. But the pain that caused her tears... He wanted to kiss them away, but was unsure if it would truly help at all.
He dipped his head so that it touched hers. "I don't want to leave you just yet, anyway," he whispered, waiting for her to open the door so that he could help her inside.
Sin: "Alright..." She opened the door and felt her legs start to give out...ugh she had to just give up and limp. Sin leaned against Rosc a bit more thankful to have his support there. She moved to sit down infront of her vanity and then cringed at her own reflection. Oh what would her mother say if she could see her now? She frowned and bent to slide off her broken shoes...they had been designer too such a shame. Well it was Professor Winters loss not hers, but still, she usually had such respect for beautiful things. She sighed and tossed them aside, no point in being tender with them now.
She looked up at Rosc and then sighed and started to pull her hair down...well most of it was already down, but parts of it still clung pitifully to the fabulous updo she had originally had. "I'll...be right back..." She stood gingerly and headed into her bathroom. She closed the door halfway, she wanted it open enough to be able to speak to him still.
"Help yourself to anything in the kitchen...though I'm pretty sure I cleared out all my perishables before the trip. Should be drinks." She called past the door as she undressed and turned on the hot water to fill her tub. She glanced in her full-length mirror and winced as she saw her legs. Oh it was hideous, different shapes and sizes of darker purple and almost black bruises were splotched all over her legs. Her ankle...oh it looked even worse then she had thought, it was swollen pretty badly, perhaps even broken? She slid on a long robe and frowned, she'd have to dress a bit more conservatively until she healed up.
Rosciel: It pained Rosc to see her so distressed, he'd had to fight the urge to help her as she went about getting ready to bathe. When she kicked off her shoes, he had rather he had done it, she could have sat down and he could have taken them off, looked her ankle over. When her hand when to her hair, his hand twitched with the want to bat it away so that he could take it down. But it wasn't even a matter of him holding back, she was just faster than he was.
She was up and limping to her bathroom before he could say a word, though she left the door cracked and offered anything in the kitchen. He decided to just go with a glass of water, which he got and then sat down next to the door, his back to the wall.
"When you're done, I can take a look at your ankle," he said loud enough for her to hear him over the running water in the bathtub. His ruined jacket crumpled on the floor at his side, he could feel the steam from the room beyond on his arm and face. After taking a drink, he set the glass down and carefully removed the bracer. He could just make out the indented scars where his aunt's claws had dug into his wrist, where his pulling had dragged them across his skin slightly before coming loose. He rubbed them a couple of times, as if they pained him, before he replaced the gold band.
Sin: "Thanks...I'm worried I might have done more then sprain it." I'm worried I might be in love with you. Except she couldn't say that so she just slid into the tub instead letting out a low hiss as the hot water covered her skin. She lay there for a moment her mind trying to catch up with everything that had happened.
"It was horrible..." losing you She finally said loud enough for Rosc to hear as she shut off the hot water and poured her bath salts into the tub. "Much worse then ChristmasTown...and I don't think I've ever been so afraid..." Because I thought I had lost everyone, because I failed everyone who ever trusted me...just like I knew I would. It felt good to say some of these things outloud, but not face to face. Not where Rosc could see, because he knew her too well, he might understand, might realize all the things she wasn't saying.
Rosciel: "I don't think you did. You could walk on it without screaming, that's a good sign. It may take longer to heal, though," Rosc replied, then listened to what else she had to say. He picked his glass back up, swirling the water in it for a moment. Jack, he wished it was something much harder. After what they had been through, they could use a drink.
"After I fell... I was nothing but my mind. I couldn't feel, but I could see the island. There was no fog, only the shades of children... And I was alone. And angry. But... All I could think about was you. If you were alright, if I would ever see you again. I told myself if I ever did, that I would kiss you like I wanted to when I first realized it really was you," he said, sighing as he let his head fall back against the wall. His head was starting to hurt; he pulled the tie from his hair.
"When we kissed in the hall, it wasn't the same. It was surprise and opportunity. I didn't want that. I wanted..." What did he want? He wanted to show her his longing, how he cared for her, how he needed her. It was strange to think of it, but he did need her. He didn't even know why, something in him just demanded so. "I wanted to show you how much you mean to me."
Sin: "I might go see Nurse Cricket if the swelling doesn't go down in a few days." Rosc was right though if it had been broken she wouldn't have been able to walk. She started to lather up and scrub and then Rosc's voice reached her. Every word made her guilt seem that much more justified. She had let go of his hand, she had crossed alone...and left him to fall. Ever ambitious, ever self serving, she knew it, but now Rosc did too. She scrubbed at her skin until it was raw and then she winced and rinsed off a bit more gently. She didn't want a trace of that horrid island left, she stood and drained the tub moving to give herself a quick cold rinse.
More shocking then the cold water though was what Rosc said about their kiss...or kisses as it were. She shut the water off and grabbed a towel then her robe. "Rosc...I'm sorry...I'm so sorry that I...I tried to reach you, but I was too slow...and I." She took a deep breath and paused in her drying. "When I thought you were gone...I realized how much you mean to me. I couldn't believe it, how fast you've come to mean so much to me. You don't know what it's like knowing that you..." She slid her robe on and tied it squeezing excess water from her hair. She slipped back out of her bathroom and looked down at where Rosc was sitting. "that you feel the same."
Rosciel: Rosc nodded slowly. That was a good plan, going to the nurse. Beautiful, caring, clever, intelligent, she was so many things he didn't deserve.
He frowned at the words that followed, looking up at her when she came out of the bathroom. "What are you talking about?" he asked before he stood. She was sorry? For not being able to grab him? He had called out, reached out to her as he had fallen, because he didn't want to lose her and he was being irrational. But now he wasn't falling to his death, he could think clearly.
"Sin, I could have dragged you down with me if you had," he paused to touch his fingertips against her cheek. "I don't know which would be worse, death or knowing that I had been the cause of... yours..." His hand shook slightly as the realization dawned on him. He had become his parents.
He understood now, the rage and guilt his father must have felt, knowing he had caused her death. His wings shivered as he bent his head slightly and let out a slow breath. "I don't think I could have bared it, even in death... Don't blame yourself for what happened, it was all that ghoul's fault, and I wouldn't have trusted the bridge to support both of us at the same time."
Sin: She moved to sit at her vanity and frowned as she took out her brush and looked in the mirror. Well it was a little better, but she still looked...tired. She started to run the brush through her hair working out little tangles and getting it back to it's usual perfect shining mass. "I'm talking about how I just...ran across and didn't turn around until I was safe..."
She got a bit more forceful with the hairbrush until Rosc touched her cheek. She slid the brush down and looked up at him. "I shouldn't have made it...not when so many others..." She broke off and looked down. "I got to safety, got free by stepping on the corpses of my friends. I'm...I'm just as ambitious as my mother had hoped I would be...maybe moreso." She felt a single tear slide down and quickly dashed it away. No...no more tears, everyone was alive, so why didn't she feel any better?
"Yes...those reapers...everyone thinks it's over..." She sighed and then tried to go back to brushing her hair. "You shouldn't say things like that Rosc...I...I'll start believing you."
Rosciel: When she finished speaking, arms wrapped around her shoulders from behind and Rosc rested his chin on her hair. He turned his vision off, he didn't want to see the mirror. "You didn't step on their corpses," he couldn't bare to say 'our'. "You could only say that if you had used the deaths. If they had been a shield or something like that. It was just chance, at any moment it could have been you, especially since you had run first across the bridge. In a way, you were risking yourself more than the rest of us had."
He thought it was over. But then, he hadn't been there at the end, hadn't seen anything, didn't know what had happened. "I take it the faculty didn't take care of the reapers, then, huh?" he asked, suddenly remembering how dirty he must be and quickly removing his head from hers. "I don't think I got anything in your hair- Wait, what? You don't believe that I mean what I said?"
Sin: "I didn't use them as shields, but I didn't stop them from being reckless...I should have. I could have told Mei not to try and make that jump. I could have held your hand when we crossed, I could have tried to push the others out of the way when I saw those blades..." She cringed for a moment closing her eyes as she remembered Riley and Malodore sliced by metal...gone. They were alive though, they were alive and back. She shivered and opened her eyes taking a deep breath.
"I was so stupid...I trusted that reaper, Famine, I gave her that key. I should have kept it...and no. No the staff came...they intervened, but they didn't defeat the reapers...and it seemed they were growing in numbers. Who knows? That portal though...all those portals...one appeared here at school. If it happened once what's to say it won't happen again? They seemed to want to protect their home, but what if they choose to attack us? We went to save some missing Trick or Treater didn't we? Who knows if he was ever rescued? No...I'm afraid...I want this to be over, but I'm worried it might not be." When Rosc pulled away she jumped a bit, was he leaving? No...no he was just worried about being dirty.
"You can use my shower...and it's not that. I mean it's not that I don't believe you feel that way now...but...things change." Once it sank in, once he realized how self serving she was he wouldn't want anything to do with her. Rosc needed a ghoul he could trust, someone who wouldn't let go.
Rosciel: Rosc didn't know how to tell her it wasn't her fault. She couldn't have done more than she had. If she had held his hand across the bridge, her heels would have caused her to fall with them, he had no doubt of that. "It wasn't your fault," he said softly and kissed the top of her head.
She offered her shower and he looked away. Could he do it? Could he take a shower knowing she was there, just beyond a door he wouldn't be able to bring himself to lock? Part of him screamed against it, that it was too risky, that she could- That she could what? Sin wouldn't hurt him, he believed that now. There were things he just wasn't used to yet, things that would take time, but in this he could trust her.
"They change for the better, too," he replied, turning away as his vision flicked back on again now that he was facing away from the mirror. He reflected on his life after the death of his parents. There had been downs, but when it all came down to it, his life had improved since that night. He'd learned to use his powers to see, had something of a support system if he put that kind of faith in Nic and the others, he had Sin.
He slipped into the bathroom, taking his coat with him. It took him a bit longer to get undressed because of the bandages he wore, but soon the water was running on the other side of the cracked-open door. He was too determined to stay with her to remember that unlike Sin, he did not have clean clothes here.
Sin: Sin felt her lips twitch in a flicker of a smile as she felt Rosc's lips against the top of her head. Jack! what was wrong with her to smile at a time like this? They had just been put through the ringer. She nodded at his words and watched him head into her bathroom. She finished brushing her hair out 100 strokes as usual then she stood and moved to her closet. She had loose black pants that might fit Rosc, well the hem would be a little high, he was too tall. She smiled as she pulled out a black dress shirt, it was for a boil, but Sin found that it was perfect lounging wear. She draped the clothes on the bed and then rummaged around for bandages. She only had a small roll, it wouldn't be enough for Rosc's chest, heck it might not even be enough for her ankle.
"There's spare towels in the cabinet!" She called out to him and then limped into her kitchen to grab a bottle of water. She frowned then and looked around noticing her Unmentionables weren't present. It wasn't that surprising, but Sin was always curious where they got off to.
Rosciel: It was a nice shower, though he felt a little silly using her soaps, but he wanted to get clean, so beggars couldn't be choosers. He always took quick showers, but he took this one a little slower than usual. He needed to think, after realizing that he didn't have clothes to change into. And on top of that... Should he just forget the bandages? The blindfold would be too much, but the bandages... She needed to see them. It would kill him if they changed her view of him, but she would see them one day, now was the best time.
He turned the water off and retrieved a towel from the cabinet she had told him about. Quick-dry of his towel and hair and then wrapped it around his waist. He quickly washed his blindfold in the sink, rung it out as best he could and tied it on. "Sin..." he said, peeking his head around the door. "I..." But he saw the clothes she had set out just as he started to speak.
Sin: Sin moved to her closet again this time finding black leggings, she had a pair of sheer...but the bruises would still be visible. She went with solid black and tugged them on wincing a bit and then sliding on a black tank top. She had to search her shoe collection to find her plain black flats, she almost never wore them. She poked her head out when she heard Rosc and pointed at the bed.
"I think those will fit you...I couldn't find a lot of bandages...I don't think I have enough for my ankle." She spent a moment trying to find an accessory before giving up and just sliding the pendant back on out of habit. She pinned her brooch on a slim black sash and gave it a quick tie around her waist.
"They fit?" She limped out and sat on the edge of bed frowning at her ankle. Ugh it was throbbing in pain, she probably should stop trying to walk on it.
Rosciel: Rosc walked out of the bathroom after he had run out to grab the clothes and then back in to put them on. The pants fit well enough. But he hadn't put the shirt on, he held it in one hand, the rolls of bandages and tape in the other. Raised and indented scars from claws littered his chest and stomach, some larger or more pronounced than others. A couple had faded well enough, but most hadn't. It looked like some large cat had gotten a hold of him and dragged its claws across his skin as he tried to wiggle free. Some even disappeared below the top of his pants, mostly on his hips.
He kept his vision on her so that he could see her reaction. He needed to see it. "They fit fine," he replied, his voice sounding just a little strained.
Sin: Sin looked up from her ankle as Rosc stepped out dressed...well half dressed. The shirt hadn't fit? That was surprisi-oh...she realized he hadn't put on his bandages revealing...his scars. She was stunned, she knew Rosc always did his best to hide the scars, and his eyes. She tried to tear her gaze away worried that she was staring...hmph. Who was she kidding? She WAS staring, she followed each horrible scar across his body with her eyes and bit her lip. It was one thing to imagine the scars her Raven might have, but it was another to see him standing there with so many. She finally stood and limped over to him to wrap her arms around him.
Rosciel: Rosc was frozen, he couldn't move as he watched her stare at him. He couldn't see where her eyes were looking exactly, but he knew she must be looking at them. He was just about to turn away when she stood, walked over, and hugged him.
He wrapped his arms around her, too, placing the side of his head against hers. "You're the only person who's seen them since I left the hospital. Only Nic and the doctors and nurses." The words were soft against her ear. He didn't know what else he should say to her. What more could be said?
Sin: "Jack...Rosc these are so deep...you could have been killed..." She slowly moved her hand down his side her fingers gently grazing some of the scars. She knew what he meant though, he meant he trusted her to see them. She leaned up to kiss his cheek. "I'm so glad you're alright, alive, here...with me."
Rosciel: Rosc shivered when she touched them, it had made a light tingling sensation. If she moved her fingers off of the scars, she probably would have had an easier time tickling him, considering the nerves were buried beneath the scar tissue. He slipped one hand to wrap around the one that was somewhat tickling him. "She hadn't wanted me dead. I was her brother's only son..." Even now he couldn't tell her that he was ticklish. It would make him lose manly-points.
"I'm glad I'm here with you too. I... never thought that I would trust someone this much."
Sin: "Well that's obviously not what she was thinking when she did this..." Sin frowned and then moved her hand away realizing he would probably be uncomfortable with the touch. "I'm sorry I couldn't find any bandages..." She leaned against him a little her ankle protesting having to stand.
"I...thought I could earn that trust...and I failed you completely at the first sign of danger..." She looked down her fingers tingled with the memory of grazing his, too late to save him from that perilous fall.
Rosciel: Rosc bent slightly and lifted Sin off her feet when she leaned against him, scooping her up as he had on the island, and carried her to her bed, setting her down upon it so that she could sit with her back against her pillows. He then moved to her feet and lifted them so that he could sit down and place them in his lap.
"I caused most of it, squirming to get away... But she was insane so..." He glanced up from inspecting her injured ankle, his damp hair falling in his face and around his shoulders. He shook his head and returned to inspecting it. "I had enough. I wanted you to see them, though," he added, feeling the swollen areas and pushing very gently. Nothing seemed broken. He leaned down to give it a kiss before he pulled his own bandages over and started wrapping it up for her.
"You... I hated the thought that you would see them and be put off by them, I hide them from everyone because I don't want to see the looks on their faces. Demons shouldn't look like this. I'd cover my wings if I could. I had to show you, had to see how you saw them, to know if this," he gestured between the two of them, "even had a chance of working."
He taped the end of the bandage down and rubbed the bottom of her foot with his hand, sighing a bit. "You didn't fail me, Sin. I don't feel that you did. You forget, when we were separated in the fog, you came looking for me when you could have left me behind. I was distracting the reaper who could have turned on you after it was done with me. When the fog was driving us mad, you could have struck me, but you trusted me to be who I was." His face turned towards hers, the look somewhat sad. "You tried to grab my hand when I fell, even when it could have meant pulling you over, too."
He looked away, trying to figure out how he could make her feel better about this, to understand how he felt. "If it had been you... If I had gone over first, like I had wanted to, to test the bridge. I would have called for you to come across when I found it safe. If you had fallen, and I tried to catch you and failed, would you think I had failed you, betrayed your trust in me?"
Sin: Sin clung to Rosc as he lifted her and then relaxed back against her pillows and sighed. This was nice, she felt home, and having Rosc there just made it a million times better. The guilt was still there but now she felt she could handle it, it wasn't overwhelming every other sense. She winced a bit as Rosc moved her legs and pushed the swollen ankle. The kiss helped though and he bandaged it far more skillfully then she could have managed. Sin was excellent at quoting procedures for first aid but when it came to actual application she couldn't stitch, wrap, or set to save her life...or anyone elses. She had made crude bandages for friends before but it was more a quick wrap and a knot, a fix when there was no other.
"Well you could hardly be expected to just lay there and suffer..." She murmured softly and found her eyes again drawn to the scars...and the way they seemed to continue into his pants. She was curious just how extensive the damage was, poor Rosc, but the worst was knowing it was his own aunt.
"I don't know what to say...you know how I feel...about you...what I told you in my eee-mails wasn't a lie. Your scars...their...horrible, but it's not your fault, and I can get used to them if you just...give me a chance. I care about you Rosc...writing to you it was the best thing in the world for me. Finding out you were here all along...the illusion...it was hard, but not because you didn't look how I expected you to. I just thought that everything else had been a lie too, but it wasn't so no matter how you look...what we have...it'll always be there." She moved to hug a pillow close still feeling off balance, feelings were hard to admit when you knew how badly they could hurt.
She gave him a wry smile and looked down "One hardly expects to see a demon looking as angelic as you either, you seem to break all conventions. I stick to my original opinion that you simply appear intimidating."
She frowned and plucked at the edge of the pillow unhappily, Rosc might think she hadn't failed him, but she knew. She knew how important trust was to him, she knew how hard it was. Showing her his scars, using her shower, letting her touch his back...they were small simple things to some, but for Rosc it was huge. She looked up at his question and frowned.
"That's different, you wanted to go over first to test the bridge. I an over first because I wanted to get out...I wanted to get myself out, and I didn't even think about you or Alcie until I was over safely. Rosc...you don't get it...I always think of myself first."
Rosciel: "Well, I suppose intimidating is a good thing," Rosc replied, leaning back a bit si that he had to prop himself up on his arms. He watched her as she spoke. She looked so insecure holding the pillow like that, so vulnerable. He knew he shouldn't, it was her bed and he really shouldn't even be sitting on it, but he had decided that he wasn't going to hold back from her anymore.
So he slipped out from under her feet and crawled up to sit next to her, reaching an arm around her shoulders. "We're all taught that, Sin. I do it, too sometimes..." He didn't care about admitting it. He would certainly put himself before Arachne and that patchwork kid and... Well, probably most of the students in the school. Sin was special for reasons he couldn't yet really comprehend. "I wanted to get out... but I wanted to get you out, too. To be honest... I'd put you and myself before... pretty much everyone here."
Sin: She watched as he moved and her lips started to curve into a smile again before smoothing back into a serious expression. Rosc's presence should not be making her smile! Her mother would be mortified if she could see her now snuggling with a boil in her bed in her dorm! Her father...well he'd probably go ballistic on Rosc, but her parents weren't here. She had just suffered a traumatizing ordeal, and besides her Raven was a gentleman. She snuggled against his side and rested her head against his chest.
"I find that being selfish is less and less gratifying...and I don't think I like the change. It's not that I want to be completely selfish...or selfless for that matter. I just...wish I didn't feel this guilty." She moved one hand away from it's grip on the pillow to lightly touch Rosc's fingers. "You....and me...it sounds amazing, but...I'm afraid I just end up disappointing you. When I thought you were gone...dead...it hurt so much Rosc. I thought that even if I got home...I wouldn't even know what to do...your friendship means everything to me."
Rosciel: Rosc let his vision flicker off as if he closed his eyes when she snuggled against him. It was a good feeling. He didn't want or expect anything from her, not at the moment. He liked getting to hold her like this. "I know you don't want to feel guilty. We can work on that together," he replied, trying to be encouraging. But then his world started to fall apart as he heard her next words. His vision snapped back on and he turned to look at her.
"My friendship... What are you trying to say?" He shouldn't have asked, he didn't want to know. He had a feeling he already knew and it was just going to hurt him.
Sin: Every word made it harder, she already felt so attached to Rosc. She had all these deep and frightening feelings, intense and uncontrollable. She frowned and looked up at him uncertainly, she bit her lip for a moment and then just said it.
"I'm saying...that I don't want to destroy our friendship by making it something more. I'm not the kind of ghoul you'd actually want Rosc, if your honest you'll realize it yourself. I have all these goals, I love being in the spotlight, I have my mother ambition...and you just want to be left alone. I get it, I respect your desire for peace and quiet after everything you've gone through. If we date...sooner or later you're not going to like it, you're not going to like me, when you see the way I really am. I'd rather us stay friends then have to lose you...again."
Rosciel: Rosc's hand shook once before he retracted it from around her shoulders, moving away from her to get off of the bed. It hurt, oh Jack, it hurt so much, after everything, after all he had tried, he'd finally lost. He had been attracted to her at the ball, when they had first met, he'd become enamored with her through their correspondence. But they had been so different, and there were so many other boils out there, he was certain there was no way he could obtain her affections. And yet somehow he had, for a time.
He'd revealed who he was and he had almost lost her. It had taken her friend Morton and his foxsquirrel Ripley to bring her back to him. He had tried being careful, being slow so that he didn't chase her away. She had watched him die, this felt so much worse than dying had.
"I knew... But somehow I fooled myself into thinking..." He shook his head and wrapped his wings around himself like a cloak, hiding most of his scars. It was his turn to feel vulnerable, bare. He had dropped the shirt she had given him on her bed before he had bandaged her foot, so he had nothing but the pants she had given him.
"I should probably let you sleep, I'm sure you're really tired..." he said, grabbing his clothes from her bathroom and heading to the door to her room. He placed one hand on the doorknob and couldn't turn it, not just yet. Something was holding him back, something clawing at the nest it had made within his chest. Vile little creature, Hope.
Sin: Sin frowned as she suddenly felt his arm move away, the warmth by her side was gone. She sat up and felt her grip on her pillow tighten as she watched Rosc stand. He was leaving?!
"Rosc wait! It's not that..." She watched as he wrapped his wings around himself and then she sprung off the bed. She couldn't just let him walk out thinking...thinking...OH JACK! She let out a low hiss of agony as the shock of landing on her ankle traveled up her bruised legs and finally connected with her brain. Oh why had she sprung off the bed like that? Ugh...she had done it a hundred times, her muscles were used to the motions of moving constantly, flexible, agile, but oh that hurt.
She fought past the pain and limped over to him, she couldn't just let him go. "Rosc...please..." This was hard, harder then walking on her sprained ankle, maybe worse then sprained now, possibly fractured. "I...I don't want you to go...I don't want to lose you because..." She bit her lip and struggled, three words Sin, it's just three words. Except she had casually said them before, but she had never meant them quite like this. She had never been afraid of having them rejected. "because...I...I love you..." Her voice came out a whispering whimper, half out of fear, and half because her ankle REALLY hurt.
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Posted: Wed Apr 18, 2012 9:41 pm
Rosciel: Rosc couldn't help himself, he rushed to her when she stumbled. Foolish ghoul, she shouldn't be doing that, not with the state of her ankle. She told him not to go, clung to him, told him she didn't want to lose him and all because...
His hands on her upper-arms, he let his head fall down enough to touch their foreheads together, careful of his horns. "I love you, too, Sin. I love you in a way that terrifies me and makes me feel empowered at the same time, like I could surpass any obstacle to get to you. But please don't do this to me," he sighed, his forehead and cheeks wrinkling as if he was squeezing his eyes tightly shut, as if he was in pain.
"I can't... be a yo-yo. I can't change my feelings for you, but it hurts when you run from me. Please, if you love me don't push me away. It hurt to lose you on this trip, but it only made me want to hold you tighter..."
Sin: She clung to Rosc half in agony, half because she was afraid he was going to walk out the door. She relaxed as she felt his forehead against hers. Then she tipped her head up to brush her lips against his. "I'm so afraid...I've never felt like this...and I don't want to ruin it. Rosc...I don't want your feelings to change...I'm just...I don't know what to do." She moved her fingers up to slide through his hair and then sighed.
"I can't...I can't push you away...and that's part of what's so terrifying. I've come to care so much...I don't know what to do."
Rosciel: "I'm afraid, too, Sin. You're beautiful and ambitious, you could have any demon in the world if you wanted and I'm..." Rosc trailed off there and shook his head once. One hand rose and alighted under her chin, holding it up incase she decided to look away at what he was about to say.
"Forget everything, my swan. For a moment, forget our families, our goals, our backgrounds, everything. Our feelings alone, you know your own and I hope you know mine... Don't think about what you should do. What do you want to do?"
She had changed him, in part. His still wanted his secluded life, running his investments from the safety and comfort of his home, shying away from the public eye as much as he could. But he also knew that if she was with him, he could do it. He could go to parties, he could socialize, he could make allies. But not alone. He needed her.
Sin: She looked up at him listening to his words trying to forget. She was back in the first moment, just a Raven and his Swan. Identities had been the cause of all this turmoil, but if she just let go and thought about what she really wanted...there was only one answer. Rosc and she belonged together, they were honest with one another, they cared about each other.
"Rosc...all I want is to be with you, to have you there always...you mean everything to me. You really see me for more...maybe even more then what I see myself for. I know I can trust you, but I don't know if I can trust myself not to end up hurting you." She brushed her fingers up against his cheek and frowned. "but...despite that...I know we belong together."
Rosciel: Rosc smiled when she finally spoke, really, actually smiled. It wasn't a smirk, wasn't a grin, nothing of the sort. It was a true, sincere, and all for her. "We'll figure this out, together," he said, then leaned down to give her a small kiss. He pulled back to smile down at her. His wings pulled from around him and he looked down at her feet.
"Come on, you should get back in bed," he finally added, rubbing his thumb over her chin affectionately. He should probably leave her alone, but it was hard to leave her. Things were so filled with turmoil between them, back and forth, back and forth, they probably did need some time to really think about things... but maybe that would make it worse. Maybe too much time to think about it on their own with just their thoughts would make the doubts grow.
Sin: "Together...sounds really nice." She smiled and had a hard time letting him break away from the kiss. Then she sighed and nodded her leg lifting gingerly and then slowly she tested her ankle and gave a soft gasp.
"I think I actually fractured it this time..." The pain throbbed outward and even as she lifted her leg relieving it of all weight she could still feel the ache. She sighed and turned to limp back towards her bed.
Rosciel: The smile faded from Rosc's face when she said she might have fractured her ankle when she jumped off the bed. Now he felt horrible. So he lifted her up, not into the way he usually carried her, dipped a bit to wrap his arms around under her butt to lift her off her feet. He carried her to her bed and set her back down on it.
"Stay there, I'm going to get you some ice. Do you want any pain-killers?" He walked back to her kitchen, his wings folded at his back once more, though the torn one hung a little more limp than the other, as it usually did. He would carry her to the nurse's office if he needed to.
Rosc headed to her kitchen, rummaged around for a bag and filled it with ice. He brought it back to her and placed it on her foot. "Well, then I'll just have to stay here so that you don't have to get up to lock the door behind me," he replied giving her a small, teasing smirk as he grabbed the shirt she had given him, slipped it over his head and wings, and walked to her side. A hand reached out to weave his fingers among her hair.
"I'll go if you want to get some sleep, though..."
Sin: She smirked at his logic and settled back relaxing as the ice began to numb the ache from her ankle. Ahhh that felt much better, she slowly smiled up at him and then pat the side of the bed.
"Don't go...I'll sleep better knowing you're here..." She reached to touch his hand. She wasn't sure how to explain how safe he made her feel. She was still afraid, even to just close her eyes and sleep.
Rosciel: Rosc was a little surprised that she wanted him to stay, and to stay the night. But it would make her sleep better and he would feel better, too, at her side and knowing that she was okay.
But he couldn't do this, there were too many things that could happen. Someone could see him coming out of her room, either in the clothes he wore on the trip or in the ones he was borrowing from her. He wasn't going to give her any problems. A hand reached out and smoothed some of her hair out of her face.
"Let me go check on my pets and get something to put on tomorrow. I'm right down the hall, I'll be right back. And I'll bring Ripley, too, I'm sure she'll be very happy to see you," he replied, though he didn't move quite yet. He wanted to know what she thought of the idea.
Sin: She yawned and nodded slowly everything as catching up with her. "Right...of course you want to change..." She smiled at the mention of Ripley. "Yes of course, bring her over...I don't know where my Unmentionables are off to..." She felt her eyelids start to slid shut and snuggled into her pile of pillows. "I'll be here..." She murmured sleepily.
Rosciel: Rosc nodded and bent down to kiss the top of her head. "I'll be right back," he said and left her side to grab his things and head out the door. He didn't peek out or anything that made him look guilty, he just walked out and shut the door behind him, walked down the hall and into his room. He was greeted by a large, furry body, namely Ban, jumping up, pressing her paws to his chest, and effectively knocking him back against the door so that she could lick his face. "Alright! Alright! You're glad I'm home! Geez, Ban, relax. It's not like I... died or anything." But he had. He'd died, right in front of Sin's eyes. Jack, how that must have killed her inside. He would have gone mad if he had been in her place.
He shook the ideas from his head and pushed her off of him, walking to his closet. He set the dirty clothes in the basket he kept and grabbed some of his own things, including pajama pants and a t-shirt. He quickly changed out of the clothes he'd been in into some more him, grabbed some extra bandages and his pain-killers (In case Sin changed her mind). He had everything but Ripley, now, but he saw hide nor hair of her. He did, how ever, hear a mewling sound from under his bed. A frown on his face, he knelt beside the bed and looked under. There was MC, curled around something small and fuzzy. "What do you have there, MC?" he asked, and his cat meowed back, ushering the other shape out from under the bed with him.
It was a small cat, like MC, only it was torn up and bleeding, it shied away from him at first, but when it saw MC rub against him and the affection he bestowed upon the other cat, it approached slowly. Rosc was careful, treating it with slow care and soft tones. It, or she as he soon found out, had been badly hurt, so he used some of his bandages to fix her up, wrapped her in a towel, and picked her up.
"I can take it from here, buddy," he said to MC, who meowed back before hopping to his bed to go to sleep. He patted Ban's head as he walked back to the door. "I'll be back tomorrow," he added and headed back to Sin's door, cracking it open slowly so as not to startle the hurt cat in his arms or Sin if she had fallen asleep.
Sin: Sin had started to drift off even as Rosc was slipping out of her room. Her eyes closed and the fringed of a dream begun. Slowly though the dream turned to fog...and darkness...the town...the school...and Rosc...falling. She woke with a gasp as her phone rang and fumbled to unplug it and answer her breath still erratic. Oh Jack...oh jack...was she ever going to get that place out of her mind? She shivered and pulled her covers up around herself.
"Hello?"
"Sin darling! I'm furious with you! What are you thinking ignoring all my calls! I've been calling and calling worried sick especially after that Christmas holiday fiasco! Where have you been? Did you remember your sunscreen? Don't tell me you've been sleeping on beaches and ruining your delicate complexion?"
"Mother...mother! MOTHER! Stop..no...I haven't. There was an accident...the boats crashed...and..." She took a deep breath and then slowly proceeded to explain what had happened. "Then Rosc...fell into the chasm...I felt so guilty mother...so many dead. Reapers everywhere..." She sobbed softly and then tried to compose herself as she finished telling her mother about the pendant, the key, the deaths of the others, and finally their rescue. Sin's mother went from concerned and panicked to worry and then relief that her daughter was alright. As all those emotions begun to settle she focused on Sin's guilt, her voice was still heavy with it and the way she said these names...Alcie, Riley, Malodore, Vivi, and...Rosc. There was care, there was love, compassion, and her precious baby girl seemed to suffer at the thought of these deaths and perils. Had Sin forgotten already everything that her parents had taught her? One made alliances, friends had their use and place, but bonds formed too quickly could create weakness. "Sin...this Rosc...you're close?"
"Rosc...rosc and I...yes...we're...we're dating mother."
"DATING!? Sin you didn't tell me that there was someone..."
"I was...confused mother...but loosing Rosc has shown me how much he means to me. I'm not going to throw away a chance to be really happy with him. He's a good demon mother, an incubus, beyond reproach."
"Hmm we'll see about that...you know how your father and I feel Sin...your studies should come first. This passion you feel is probably just because of all the stress of this horrible trip. Why not just take some time away from the boil and see if you don't feel differently..."
"No...no mother, I'm not going to let anything slide. I still have the club to worry about...and my studies...but I'm sure about Rosc."
"Sin...reconsider my love you're young. You should think of this as an experiment darling."
"Rosc isn't an experiment mother, I've had my fun flirting with all sorts of boils, but this is different."
"Of course it is...you should rest darling, you probably look a mess. I'll call you later when you've had time to recover and get your head straight..."
"Until then mother...tell father that I'm alright...and that I handled myself against those reapers..."
"Yes...I will...sleep now Sin we'll discuss this further later."
"Goodbye mama...I...I love you."
"Yes of course...goodnight."
Sin sighed and ended the call sliding her phone back to charge and then looking up as Rosc opened the door. She peered curiously at the bundle he had in his arms and decided not to mention the phone call.
Rosciel: Rosc had heard part of the conversation, something that made all the doubt in him relax and a new worry grow. He was not an experiment to Sin, what they had was real. But her mother was going to be a problem, he decided. He had asked her once if she had any crazy relatives or anything like what his father's family had been and she had told him no. He started to worry that she hadn't seen where her mother's opinions lay.
"Ripley wasn't around," he said as he carefully closed the door behind him and locked it. He moved to her vanity and set his bandages and medicine down, put the clothes she had given him, as well as the change of clothes he had for tomorrow, onto the chair. That done, he walked over to her and sat down on the edge of the bed, moving the towel back slowly to show her the scared little white cat, its large red eyes flicking from one student to the other.
"MC must have found her, they were hiding under my bed," he explained, carefully stroking the top of her head with the tips of his fingers.
Sin: Sin watched Rosc set things down and then leaned up worried to hear about Ripley. "I hope she's alright..." Then he sat down on the bed and revealed a very frightened looking little white kitten. It looked like a wish, those fluffy sweet feline-esque minipets. She frowned at the bandages and looked back up at Rosc. "Poor thing...I wonder what happened to her."
She slowly extended her hand to see if it would allow itself to be pet. "What are you gonna name her?" She tried to gently stroke the little wish under her chin.
Rosciel: "She's probably in the closet. She does that sometimes, to get away from the boring that is Ban and MC," Rosc replied with a chuckle and reached out to stroke Sin's hand. The Wish took that as a sign that the ghoul was on the same level as the boil that had bandaged her up, so she carefully set her head under the outstretched fingers.
Rosc watched the cat-creature with a small smile. "I wonder that, too... I donno, maybe Nightingale," he added, bringing his hand back so that it wasn't in the way of Sin petting the Wish nor crowding her. He didn't want to scare it. Now that he had time to think about it, he wondered how they were going to do this. She wanted him nearby, but... He didn't mind sleeping in a chair as long as he could prop his feet up. He could sleep above the covers, too, or sitting up if she wanted him even closer. It would be up to her.
Sin: "Nightingale...that's very pretty..." She smiled and pet the wish softly behind her ears before slowly moving back. She didn't want to smother the poor little thing. "You have the sweetest pets...." She yawned then and covered her mouth before looking at him with a soft smile. "I suppose everything is catching up with me and making me tired..."
She glanced at him uncertainly and then around her room, she wanted to snuggle with him. Except of course she knew how that would seem. Too much, too fast...but it wasn't like that, she just wanted Rosc nearby, to feel the safety of his arms. She glanced at the chaise lounge in the corner of the room and then smoothed the covers down beside her. "I...I appreciate you staying....I promise I won't make a habit of it...I know your not comfortable in strange places." She looked down and then glanced back at the lounge. "You can sleep there...or you can sleep on the bed...I don't mind...as long as you promise to be a gentleman." She gave him a soft teasing smile, but she hoped he would choose to lay on the bed with her. Maybe if she could feel Rosc nearby the nightmares would go away.
Rosciel: "Sin, you wound me!" Rosc exclaimed softly, putting a hand over his heart and giving her a teasing smirk, trying to make her smile. "I'm always a perfect gentleman," he finished, moving to the open spot on the bed that she had indicated. She had offered it, so he felt less bad about it. Besides, he would feel weird not having something there with him, he generally had all three of his pets with him at night. Though Sin was a much better option in his opinion.
He settled down, on top of the covers, and tucked Nightingale between them. She seemed to be okay with it, he noted as she yawned and curled up between the two demons. His smile turned soft as he offered his arm for her to use as a pillow. She had good taste in bedding, it all gained his approval.
It was weird, he didn't feel so uncomfortable. When he had been younger, when he had bad days or gotten sick, Rosanna would stay with him. And he had hated it. It was the worst nights he had ever had. But this... He wasn't troubled. It was as if something was telling him that this was right, that he should try.
Sin: Sin relaxed and smiled at Rosc glad for his teasing, glad that he didn't seem too put out. She knew he wasn't very trusting, having to spend the night in her room was probably going to be unpleasant for him. Hopefully he'd be able to sleep though, she didn't want to make him miserable after all. She moved to rest her head against his arm and snuggled down happily. "Rosc...you're...the best..." She yawned and then felt her eyes slide shut. She was so tired that she drifted to sleep with ease her fingers lightly moving against the little wish before going still.
Rosciel: Rosc smiled as he watched Sin fall asleep. There was no way he'd be able to stand it without her. He really did need her in his life. There had been a time where he thought he would have been fine on his own, no family, no friends, nothing. Had his mother felt that way once? Was that why she had been so distanced from her family? No, she had made a new family in the club. She had trusted them, had trusted Nicodemus not only with his word on the value of a blonde flirt he had introduced to her, but also with the life and well-being of her only child.
"I love you, Sin," he whispered, kissed her forehead, and turned off his vision, letting himself relax into a dreamless sleep.
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