alright, here goes...

so, with my depression over Shandrel leaving me, I got realy excited over the Masquerade ball that Nerd Society was throwing... I went there wearing my dress, and had a blast. mostly because Emly got all excited and happy and wanted to dance with me and Warren (who was also wearing a dress). we hadn't realy talked before, her and I. we became friends that night, and hung out pretty much every day since then (especially when I crossdressed, which I have been doing more often). thing is... I think I'm developing MORE than just a crush on her... and she knows that I have had a little crush on her that I won't follow up on.

well, there was this big mess with like 6 or 7 girls all crushing on Warren... and then Lady-Blake, Brandon and Warren were all trying to play cupid, and gossip, and meddle... justifying it by claiming to know what's best for everyone. I opposed this, for personal reasons. I think gossip and meddling are terrible ideas that always end up hurting people. turns out, Emly was one of those girls, but none of them knew it. at first.

they also plotted trying to hook her up with Clifford. when I told her there was a plot to do that, she asked who it was. I was hesitatnt to tell, because Brandon is one of my close friends and there's a bond of trust there... but she was hurt and needed to know... so I explained it all. she asked if she could bring it up publically and I let her do so.

she announced that people need to stop meddling, to stay out of her love life, that she was actually about to tell Cliff to stop getting so close, and that she was about ready to flip tables. I jumped in and said that I tattled. so, everyone was pissed at me, and Brandon feels betrayed, but he's still being an awesome friend... I was scared that I was gonna be ostracized, but turns out that the group is pretty tolerant.

anywho, I've been helping Emly with her feelings, and we've been getting close. but I'm nervous that I'm gonna end up scaring her away. I realy just wanna keep being her companion, not have a romance, despite my feelings... so I'm hoping that she can sense that much. and yet, I keep finding myself wondering if she is experiencing similar thoughts, or if I'm making her think that I'm hitting on her like everyone else who isn't who she's interested in...

and on top of that, Warren had the nerve to tell her that she has poor self-control (when she's been bottling this up the whole time, and only FINALLY even said anything on my recomendation)... so I'm pissed at him, but I'm not going to get involved... cause then I'd be a hypocrite. and I'm still being polite to him, I don't think he even suspects that I know he said that, let alone that I'm angry about it.